wandering towards dawn

my& name is yíxù (“wandering towards dawn”). 21, chinese, non-TMA. i eat sertraline for breakfast and testosterone for dessert (header by manuhamu, icon by Kiliko_)

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reading umineko chapter 6

this theme reoccurs so much in umineko. this is also bernkastel and erika

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reading umineko chapter 6

:(((

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reading umineko chapter 6

:(

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reading umineko chapter 6

is he calling himself an incel im crying

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life has gone to shit so i'm back to umineko

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reading umineko chapter 6

i really like the interactions between the two sister beatrices

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reading umineko chapter 6

thinking about human-beatrice trapped in kuwadorian... to have it drilled into you so early on that your only purpose of existence is to serve your father by being just like his past romantic and sexual victim is so deeply harmful, it feels like a miracle if the pain of it can be understood by another person at all

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reading umineko chapter 6

ueeeehhhghh

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reading umineko chapter 6

um this absolutely sounds like one person (one system) talking to themself. ???

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reading umineko chapter 6

:(((( i really like kanon

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reading umineko chapter 6

so is it like, game-master battler is trying to "revive" beatrice by birthing a new person who looks like the previous beatrice and raising her from scratch to turn out just like the previous beatrice... just like kinzo did in real life by sexually and romantically grooming his child human-beatrice ?? i'm going to maybe throw up

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reading umineko chapter 6

is this version of beatrice like a copy of the human-beatrice trapped in kuwadorian who talked with rosa in her childhood? she assumes that this battler must be kinzo, the main figure (maybe only male figure) in her life? why is he going along with it and acting like kinzo would?

this is probably supposed to feel intensely gross in the way that kinzo's incestuous abuse of human-beatrice was intensely horrible

this line below especially reminds me of the way an abusive father will talk to bystanders who question the nature of his relationship with his victim. "it's a personal family matter, you're outsiders, it has nothing to do with you"

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reading umineko chapter 6

EW?

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reading umineko chapter 6

early guess, this is the witch form of hanyuu's painful time as an observer of hinamizawa in the same way that bernkastel is the witch form of rika's painful time rolling for a miracle to escape hinamizawa

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reading umineko chapter 6

i have no idea where this is going but i'm liking the frank depiction of what marriage really is

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reading umineko chapter 6

who the fuck are you people

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might start umineko chapter 6 soon, a whole lot has happened in my life and i’m feeling like it might be time