two for flinching.

Audrey Rocio Ramirez. 6th year. 17. Ravenclaw. I have a pet toad named Cookie, a pet rock named Edgar, and a pet Slytherin named Flynnigan.

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I still stand by the violence and scaring. 

No. No pudge. I can have no pudge. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

You've never been to one of my practices, you wouldn't know.

What if I like it?

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

No, you can just ‘cause you’re violent and they’re scared of you. 

*winces, rubbing his stomach sadly* …excuse me while I go work out for three weeks. Straight.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

I found a way that works.

Awh. Don't worry about it, Flynny. It's just a little pudge.

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I do do that! And then they get angry and accuse me of yelling all the time! Shut up. I am a real captain. 

I - am - not - squishy.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

A real captain could control their team is all I'm saying.

You're a little squishy. Just here. -Audrey reached out and pinched his stomach.-

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I do so play! It’s hard to play when they’re all just hovering there, not getting anywhere close to throwing any Quaffles at me!

…are you - are you insinuating that I’m…squishy? 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

Then maybe you should get your team in shape too. Run some drills? Like a real captain?

No! I'm just.. implying it.

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

Okay - that’s just not fair. They all say I always yell, but I only yell when they’re being idiots and that’s all the time. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

But you could also, you know, play.

Not that I'm complaining. You're much softer now.

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

Your mocking face is sure telling me to be ashamed - but I’m not, because I’m not pudgy! I’m still Quidditch captain, I work out. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

Last I heard, you spent practice yelling at everyone from the hoops. I don't think screaming does much for burning calories.

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

How dare you. I am not!

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

You've just not had the time to work out as much since you've been head boy. It's nothing to be ashamed of!

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I swear these trousers fit me three months ago...

The hell happened? 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

You are getting a little pudgy around the middle.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

*groans dramatically* Ugh, whyyyyy. *mouth gapes for a moment before he lunges at her, twisting off the cap and pouring half of it down the back of her shirt* Not so funny when you’re the one bathing in comfortable stickiness, is it?

I am not! You’re not a pancake. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

I'm from Spain. You do realize that I'm from Spain, yeah? Try not to sound like it's a bloody punishment to visit or I'll just go on my own and you can spend the summer with Hercules and Phil! -Audrey jumped when the stickiness started it's slow descent down the back of her shirt.- Fucking hell! -She turned back on him with the whipped cream and aimed it at his nose.- TAKE THAT!

I AM THE PANCAKE OVERLORD! YOU SHOULD FEAR MY BREAKFAST POWER!

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[workingon-my-roar]

*stands on the end, balancing himself with one arm so he can hold his wand out* No problem - Nemesco! 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

-The cart took off flying and Audrey let out a loud 'whoop' of appreciation.- HEY! D'you think we could make it between those two pillars there then jump that wall to land?

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[sofamous-ivegotmyownactionfigure]

*takes a bite of his own pancake mask* So good. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

I think that constitutes as cannibalism, love.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

Doesn’t count. Naveen’s bloody house was a country in itself, s’not like I went out much. *glare of doom* …give me that. 

No proposals at all. But I still prefer a non-pancake girlfriend. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We're going this summer then! -Audrey grinned with a mischievous glint in her eye.- No. -She turned the bottle upside down on him.- MY PEOPLE WILL HAVE THEIR REVENGE!

Then you're shit out of luck, Flynny.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[workingon-my-roar]

Neither ‘m I. 

I’ve been dying to try this since - the other day - but still. You seem fun. This should go swimmingly. *ponders for a moment before pulling off his shoe, quickly transfiguring it into a somewhat lopsided but functional cart* …good enough. Hop in. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

-Audrey shrugged and got up, jumping into the cart more gracefully than the lopsided cart should have allowed. She braced herself at the front, ready for anything.- C'mon. Let's see if we can beat Nearly Headless Nick down the corridor!

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

Do I look like I’ve been to Spain to you? Well - you know, not in the middle of the night and only in your bedroom? M’not ignorant, but Hogwarts isn’t exactly an area big in Spanish cuisine - oi! Away from the hair!

I just said m’not. There will be no pancake proposals. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

Naveen ring a bell? Any of those summers at his place? That's Spain, buddy. -Audrey grabbed two more handfuls of syrup and ran it through his hair-

No proposals. Pancake or otherwise.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[workingon-my-roar]

Ah, seems sensible enough. M’definitely not part horse, so that probably won’t work, unless you want a very slow trip to the kitchens.

Well, girl…I did learn how to transfigure one of those Muggle shopping carts the other day - reckon being pushed across cobblestones in one of these would be painful? Or if we used our wands to blast some air it’d go so fast that we fly over them - 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

I'm not very fond of slow.

If you're suggesting flying to the kitchens in a shopping cart... I'm game.

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[here-comes-the-smoulder]

I don’t think Spanish pancakes exist, nor do I think they have the bone structure to navigate ships. *steals some more syrup* And I get that you meant bending the knee as a sort of saluting my allegiance, but I definitely took it in a proposal sort of way - and I’m not proposing to a pancake. 

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

Do you actually know nothing about Spain? Seriously? Two. Two of your best friends are Spanish. It is amazing you are still this ignorant. -She takes some of the syrup and pours it on his head.-

You're not proposing to anyone!

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

We are from the land of pancakes, and

[workingon-my-roar]

What’s Herc got to do with it? I’m sure we could find some sort of creative transportation to the kitchens…

[hardlyaudreyhepburn]

Herc is part best friend and part horse. I'd just have him carry me if he were here. It made sense in my head.

What are you thinking...boy?