[[Closing]] Coming Home.
Nanami sat still on her bed, staring blankly on the letter in her hands. It was raining outside thus she was soaked all over by the time she arrived in her dorm room, but she couldn't care less.
The letter was a letter of rejection.
Long story short - she didn't get accepted into any voice acting roles she has applied to.
Her only choice, as her promise, is to leave Bunkyo. She already told her parents that if she failed the audition, it means the end of her voice acting career and she will go back to her family in Osaka. It was a risky move, and for her it meant failure is not an option- it was the only way for her to pursue her dreams since her parents greatly disagreed with her being a voice actress.
Hence, she worked so hard for it, dedicating herself to become a real voice actress like she dreamt of. She sacrificed hours and days that she could have used socializing with her new friends to enrol in a voice acting class, and juggled up with all part time work to sustain her living since her parents refused to support financially. She practiced for hours, read books, watched videos to learn from the experts all to improve her skills.
Yet all of those, through a single letter, were proven to be not enough.
She still failed, she felt all her hard work were all for nothing. It made her feel stupid for not realizing her own capacities that no matter how hard she work, she just won't make it. If only she knew it'll end like this, she would have preferred to enjoy her high school life peacefully like other people who are still not thinking much about their future.
Her hands crumpled the paper in frustration, mixed emotions began to rise inside her. Anger. Disappointment. Sadness. She already put up with so much, why didn't they want to take her for even a single role? Talent and connections trumped over hard work, she thought bitterly to herself.
She wanted to have fun too. She has met many kind people here in Ouran, and yet she couldn't fully get to know them because she was too fixated on her dreams. If she wasted time on nonproductivity she'll only regret it later when she fails, or so she believed. Now she didn't build close friendships and failed her audition - she just lost it all.
So what was all that hard work for?
The young girl, unable to contain herself anymore, began to cry. She cried and cried, even though she knew it would change nothing and it's a sign of weakness, the tears just won't stop. After awhile, she finally started to feel tired and laid down on her bed, feeling tired of everything. As her consciouness faded, she wondered if it's a good thing or not that her roommate wasn't around to watch her break down like this.
--
Morning has arrived, and she had to get herself together. She felt empty and she didn't feel like doing anything, but her body still moved as if it's on emotionless autopilot. She packed her things, cleaned up her room, and left the dorms to take care of whatever she still needed to do before her leave.
Her steps felt heavy. She still remembered when she first arrived here, full of hope and courage that she will be able to change her life here. Yet it's all over now. She's going home, meeting her parents, and settle with another line of work she has yet to know what. She tried to convince herself that it's not that bad.
Turning back on her heels, she paid another look to the grand building that used to be her school for the past few months.
"Goodbye, Ouran," she whispered, another tear finally came out as she managed a weak smile, "Thank you for everything."
