she amantia on my agaric til i fly

harley | they/he | 21 personal yapping and non-art blog! (main is @fulshrum) profile pic by @aespriterico !

[pukicho]

The masculine urge to eat food to live

[mushroomburial]

The feminine urge to fucking starve and die I guess?

[pukicho]

Yeah

[pukicho]

The masculine urge to eat food to live

[pukicho]

There is literally nothing more powerful on this planet than taking a 15 minute walk twice every day.

[pukicho]

If you have ADHD like me, walk 15 minutes twice a day like your life depends on it.

[opossumofdoom]

should we not be on our phones during 15 minute walk, boss?

[pukicho]

That phone is better off dead than in your hands.

[pukicho]

Take a musician's advice: without.

[austinthewise]

But... but it's cold...

[pukicho]

Jacket

[pukicho]

The purpose of The Walk is to factory-reset your brain from the effects of overstimulation. The fewer things hindering your ability to think is best. Music is an external influence on your brain. As great as it is, it still hinders self-motivated thought and blocks you from attuning to the outdoors as easily. Everyone's different, but that's me.

[harharharleyshroom]

MERLIN SHELDRAKE AND COSMO SHELDRAKE ARE BROTHERS?????????

HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS!!!!!!

[pukicho]

tell me what to draw

[doa333]

dog riding a bicycle

[pukicho]

[im-a-rock]

Why is the Bike Hyper-realistic.

[pukicho]

Which one?

[pukicho]

Quarked up white boy

[pukicho]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

not my circus however the monkeys appear to be holding me hostage

[harharharleyshroom]

the lion does not concern himself with failing a class with a 68% grade.

[i'm going to start sobbing uncontrollably.]

[lowpolyanimals]

Rat from Max Payne

[harharharleyshroom]

have you every wondered what you would be if you were a low poly animal? perhaps a crunchy little squirrel, or maybe just a fucked up guy? if the answer is yes, this quiz is for you! made by lowpolyanimals.tumblr.com

YEAAAA... YEAAAHAHAHAA!!!!!!!! THANK YOU @lowpolyanimals​

[pukicho]

My retirement plan is to be dead in a pit

[riogrrl]

is there any extra room in the pit? i am interested in joining u in this plan

[pukicho]

I can't even get my own pit

[pukicho]

Kids these days are too soft. Back in my day, life was like War. Bloodshed and War. I was so scared. I want my child to experience that too for some reason.

[pukicho]

You're a fucking PUSSY if you think this is bad parenting

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

so what you're gonna do is you're gonna trim the top off a bulb of garlic, using the knife's edge to take off the tip of every individual clove, that's important. you're gonna place the garlic face-up in a square of tinfoil, drizzle with olive oil, wrap completely in foil, place in baking tray, repeat with a copious amount of garlic bulbs. you're gonna put that baking tray in an oven set to 375-400°F, for 30-50 minutes, until soft and browned. you're gonna toast some good bread, slather generously with butter and honey, maybe a tiny lil bit o' salt. and then. you're gonna SQUEEZE. OUT. THAT. ROASTED GARLIC. onto the butter honey toast. and you're gonna eat it. food stolen directly from the plate of the gods. that's what you're gonna do.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the garlic. it beckons you

[landsccape]

[harharharleyshroom]

taking a page out of the tried and true Tumblr Dreamposting(TM) (mirroring the minds of @biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist and @one-time-i-dreamt) because holy shit i need to see if other people's brains are built as incorrectly as mine.

so, i have premonition dreams. basically just super mundane, boring dreams that i have one day and think "huh, weird" and then some span of time later that exact thing happens. it isn't just a phrase or a familiar thing, it's a beat-for-beat perfect recreation of the exact scenario and exact "scene" that actually unfolds wayyy in the future. sometimes these things happen years before the event takes place; one i can think of off the top of my head is a dream i had of me just lazing around in my apartment by myself in the present day that i had in 20-GODDAMN-20, when i was SIXTEEN!!!! (this one accidentally gave me a lot of hope that i was gonna be ok later in life because holy SHIT that year was rough in a way that was completely unrelated to the whole "major historical event" superhell)

in spite of this, sometimes my brain likes to throw me red herrings. i have dreams that LOOK like premonition dreams, that FEEL like premonition dreams, but in them some random analog-horror-lookin motherfucker pops up and kills me at the end of it. sometimes it's the same guy, sometimes it's just A Random Nondescript Guy, sometimes it's some basic cookie-cutter scary monster, but one these fuckin' things just seem to pop in on me watching a video essay or some shit with the intent of munchity-crunch my bones.

the worst part is, these ones STILL predict some random event in the future, just without the scary monster, and every single time the paranoid little rat in me does a full-body turn in the direction where the monster would normally be, like it's a television show and it's waiting for its queue to enter the scene. and obviously, because i'm still here, the monster never appears.

i'm sure this is just my particular breed of paranoia, but like. please, god, tell me someone vaguely relates to this, or at least understands what the hell is going on.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

on the one hand, hate to be that person who forces people to listen to their dreams

on the other hand, the clowns have been getting INCREASINGLY vocal

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

we all have killer clown dreams from time-to-time but mine appear to be developing a plot. don't love that. second-to-last-dream ended in a bloodthirsty clown catching me (as usual), unhinging its jaw and fangs and so-forth, dangling me over its gaping maw yada yada—before interrupting the established narrative to give me a thumbs up and hand me a brochure???

at which point my Dream Brain decided i retroactively realized all the clowns chasing me had simply been aggressively trying to hand out promotional fliers.

[harharharleyshroom]