[throathole]

[localvillagecryptid]

Shen Yuan transmigrates into a widower (demon or cultivator, idc), and immediately sets about using this aspect of his character as a convenient excuse to protect him from being perceived as a threat to one Lord Binghe the Harem-Builder. He commits himself so hard to the bit that people genuinely think he's still in deep mourning for his wife and can never get over her. Luo Binghe falls for The Hot Widower and desperately tries to convince him to open his heart to one more, and see beyond his late wife. His many attempts at wooing only convince Shen Yuan even more that Binghe is testing Shen Yuan's likelihood of attempting to steal Binghe's unethical amount of wives, which pushes him to commit even harder to the bit. He completely ignores the fact that Binghe doesn't even have a girlfriend, let alone a harem. Rinse and repeat until someone dies.

[takeholdofthesun-deactivated202]

So I kinda thought what if Shen yuan was like a middle aged widower who settles down in a nice little town on the border of the demon realm and becomes a farmer. He picks up unconscious Binghe who just climbed out of the abyss while he‘s traveling back from town. Figuring that if he takes him in a nurses him back to health (even giving him the clothes off his back, or what little he has) it will protect him from future torment at the hands of the demon emperor.

This is my contribution….

[t0riop]

cold...but warm?

[kav3h]

moshang rkgk… the losers

[sunderwight]

Gigantic super stacked polar bear but it has a collar and leash and holding onto the other end is this perpetually terrified-looking hamster.

Every time the polar bear decides to go charging at something the hamster flips up off the ground and has to hold onto the leash for dear life. But every time the hamster goes somewhere the polar bear just sort of begrudgingly follows along as if it has to.

Onlookers uncertain why the polar bear is wearing the leash + collar in the first place OR why the hamster doesn't just let go.

This is moshang. To me.

[sunderwight]

Shen Yuan, recently transmigrated into one of Luo Binghe's wives, gently brushing out the protagonist's hair and cuddling him and chatting softly about a book he read after their "marital activities": gotta be convincing as one of the wives who adores the stallion protagonist!

Luo Bingge, who figured out like eight weeks ago that some otherworldly spirit has possessed one of his wives because she's treating him like none of them ever has on any occasion: so it's looking like sex isn't going to "cure" this affliction but who is to say for certain better just keep trying that and nothing else ever

[acrylicae]

theyre so dumb

[juicedpeachy]

his king is quite heavy…

[chkrschss]

Imagining some kinda plot line where SY developing his next AMV and SQH is delivering his food. From the door, SQH can clearly see SY’s computer with a drawing of Luo Binghe with his harem in some video editing software

[confuzing]

Liu Qingge:*feels the shifting spiritual energies of his students sneaking up on him*

Liu Qingge: Hey!

*most of the students flee, one particularly bold one steps into view though*

Liu Qingge: Kssst! *he pulls out a spray bottle*

*the last student scurries off*

SQQ (who came over for tea): ...Shidi has such an interesting relationship with his disciples.

[confuzing]

It's traditional going back to the first Bai Zhan Peak Lord, who was a crazy cat lady on top of being extremely badass.

[confuzing]

SQQ: Ok that's it! *pulls out paper and a brush*

SQQ, narrating his letter out loud: Dear Liu Qingge, please accept Ming Fan into Bai Zhan Peak-

Ming Fan: Shizun no!!

SQQ: As he has decided he knows better than this master he must continue his cultivation elsewhere.

Ming Fan: I'm sorry Shizun!

SQQ: I trust you will be able to handle any further uncouth-

Ming Fan: *gasps*

SQQ: and unfilial -

Ming Fan: *starts crying*

SQQ: behavior. He is good at organizing things perhaps you can put him in charge of the armory.

Ming Fan: *falls to his knees* This disciple was wrong Shizun! Please don't send me away!

SQQ: *folds and seals letter dramatically*

SQQ: *hands it to Ming Fan* take that to the kitchens and burn it- then I don't want to see you again today!

Ming Fan: *sniffling* Yes Shizun. Thank you Shizun! *leaves*

SQQ: Oh hello Shidi I didn't see you there.

LQG, who is just here to show SQQ the weird bug he found on his last mission: Shixiong has such an interesting relationship with his disciples.

[konjiang]

Luo Binghe trying to court Shang Qinghua goes worse than him courting Shen Qingqiu. (Of course courting with permission of SQQ and MBJ) Shang Qinghua misinterpreted everything Luo Binghe does.

He gives SQH a nice necklace, but SQH reads between the nonexistent line and thinks that LBH wants him to find out the mystery behind it. LBH cooks for him, only for SQH to think he's sampling the food before LBH could present it to his shizun. With no other strategy, LBH kisses SQH. He expects some sort of reaction, but SQH’S responded with, "Very nice kiss, maybe a little less teeth. I'm sure Shen-shixiong would like it." He whines about it to MBJ and SQQ, trying to find ways to make his feelings known.

LBH: "MBJ, how did you do it?"

MBJ: "Noodles"

LBH: "But I already tried food! Shizun, how did you do it?"

SQQ: "I yelled at him"

LBH: "I can't do that. He starts shaking and hiding whenever I slightly show any displeasure."

With the help of his shizun and MBJ, they managed to manipulate SQH into a wife plot with LBH. Even then, SQH thinks LBH slept with him out of necessity.

"..."

[jackie-q]

you need some active rom-com techniques for this one fellas- honestly the main issue is just the fact that sqh genuinely does not believe the Protagonist could ever be into someone like him or even that anyone could ever be into someone like him-

like for the other two he can rationalize it: Mobei-Jun is his literal dream man, he probably subconsciously made him mbj's exact type cause he never would've liked him otherwise or even just the fact that he thinks he earned that relationship with his years of service, and then sqq can easily be chalked up to Stockholm syndrome or codependency on the only other person who can ever understand what a meme is- they're stuck together so obv sqq is a bit sticky, he's only been here 10-ish years tops, he'll probably get over it or it'll become normal background noise they never have to talk or think about too much.

Binghe tho? He has no such excuses or reasonings for Binghe- The Protagonist does what he wants and the world bends to accommodate him- that's how it works! He genuinely can't think of any reason lbh would want him that way unless maybe if they were like the last people on the planet, and maybe even then Binghe would probably either kill him or leave him there to hop over to a dimension where his precious Shizun is still alive and well

[ryokan-yh]

BAMF Shang Qinghua is my favorite trail..

[problemsleuth]

i just think more 30-40 year old men should be more whorish. act your age for once.

[problemsleuth]

unbutton your shirt and show off some cleavage and wear some sexy underwear and maybe then youll feel better.

[nibbelraz]

Mobei jun appointing a bunch of little hamster demons as Shang Qinghua's secretaries

[i-suggest-scumplane]

CW: discussion of kinks

Love it how if Shen Qingqiu and OG Shang Qinghua were to date everyone would assume Shen Qingqiu was a deviant taking advantage of Shang Qinghua but really Shang Qinghua is freaky in ways Shen Qingqiu couldn’t even fathom before they met.

Shen Qingqiu isn’t innocent by any means, he has heard things from the brothel ladies that would make most squirm. It is simply that Shang Qinghua had access to the internet and wrote porn for a living. Shen Qingqiu thinks a weird kink is wanting to be stepped on, Shang Qinghua knows what vore is.

[sugartz]

BooBas ～✿♡