The conference room sat at the top of the buildingâfiftieth floor, windows blacked out, curtains sealed, lights dimmed to a corporate haze. The room was long and unusually casual, plush coaches set around circular tables carved from some endangered hardwood varnished into extinction. Twelve men sat around it, each one the kind of billionaire whose biography was always described with the phrase âcontroversial but effective.â Their suits were tailored, their ties crisp, and their souls collectively accrued from several centuries of monopolies, exploited workforces, and very well-hidden offshore accounts.
At the head sat Grayson Stone, founder of half the worldâs largest logistics chains and owner of the other half. Thick-fingered, gray-haired, and somehow always sipping a drink that was never empty. He tapped on said glass.
âGentlemen. Letâs begin.â
The room settled. A few of the men checked their phones. A few adjusted their watches. All of them carried the same bored, heavy certainty that nothing in the world could possibly surprise them anymore.
Slate cleared his throat.
âAs you all know, the world isâpardon my languageâfucked.â
Several men nodded solemnly, while others smiled in amusement.
âEconomically, geopolitically, socially, ethically⊠pick a category. We have a crisis in every one.â Slate gestured lazily to the curtained windows. âRevolutions, pandemics, wars, the dissolution of attention spans, the collapse of traditional family structures, the rise of freelancingââ he shuddered ââand donât get me started on democratic participation.â
A ripple of disgust moved across the table.
âSociety has reached uncharted levels of âfreedom,â added Elliot Brand, the tech mogul whoâd cornered the cloud computing market. âPeople donât want to follow rules. They want their own opinions. Their own facts.â He sighed heavily. âAnd they argue. All the time.â
âThey think,â muttered Holmes Price, the pharmaceutical giantâs CEO, as if naming an unspeakable sin. âEven when we tell them not to.â
âAnd worst of all,â chimed in Bruce Dallow, owner of the largest construction conglomerate on the planet, âthey die.â
âMortality,â he explained. âMakes them unpredictable. Scared. Panicked. They do stupid things. They riot. They vote incorrectly. They write think-pieces.â
The table collectively winced at that last one.
Slate leaned back, folding his hands.
âExactly. People are too complicated. Too varied. Too⊠human.â
The word hung in the air like an uncomfortable truth rather than an obvious fact.
âAnd men,â Slate continued, âare⊠wellâŠâ He made a vague motion, a half-hearted shrug. âImprovement is needed. But you know.â Another shrug. âWe can work with that.â
Several of the men snorted. One of them whispered âBetter than dealing with women,â and the whole table chuckled with the casual, oblivious cruelty of men who had never once been told no.
âBut!â Slate lifted a finger. âWe donât have to tolerate complexity. We donât have to tolerate intelligence. We donât have to tolerate personalities that arenât immediately useful.â His voice gained momentum, the tone of a man revealing the twist to a plan heâd been crafting for years.
âWe can fix all of this.â
Elliot leaned forward. âWith what? Psychological conditioning? Behavioral nudges? Targeted propaganda? Weâve tried and tired, it hasnât worked since the late 90sâ
Slate smiled. âMore⊠direct methods.â
A silence swept across the table. Then:
âWhat, exactly, are you proposing?â Holmes demanded.
Slate pressed a button beneath the table.
The lights dimmed. A projector hummed to life. On the screen behind him, a massive slide appeared in stark white letters:
THP: THE HOMOGENIZATION PROJECT
Several of the men squinted. A few adjusted glasses. One or two nodded in premature approval, as if the name alone had sold them. Slate clasped his hands behind his back.
âGentlemen⊠society has failed. Democracy has failed. Education has failed. The market,â he cast a look at Elliot, âhas not entirely failed, but the customers have.â
âThe problem is that people think too much, feel too much, disagree too much. They innovate incorrectly. They aspire incorrectly. They vote incorrectly. They form relationships incorrectly.â
âAnd some of them,â he added, âare women.â
(Nods. Several satisfied sighs. Somebody muttered: âFinally someone says it.â)
âWe need a society that is simple. Predictable. Obedient. Unburdened by high cognition, existential dread, or excessive personality traits.â
He clicked to the next slide:
PHASE 1: UNIVERSAL TRANSFORMATION
âAnd the solution,â Slate said, pacing slowly, âis to remake the worldâs population into something more manageable. To eradicate variance. To standardize humanity.and to do this we must transform them.â
The room buzzed with various reactions of shock, amusement, and lots of confusion. Holmes Price gave a suspicious glance at Grayson, waiting to see where he was going with this.Â
âWe will transform every person, across all nations, all ages, all identities, into a narrow demographic range: approximately sixteen to thirty-seven, all male, all engineered with predetermined personalities that are simple, agreeable, predictable, and entirely loyal to the new world order.â
A complete silence. Then someone asked:
ââŠLike⊠like NPCs?â
âBetter,â Slate said cheerfully. âLike influencers. But stupider.â
The room erupted in impressed murmurs.
âAnd what,â Holmes asked, âwill these⊠men⊠act like?â
âWhatever we tell them to,â Slate replied. âThey are perfectly content doing what they are told. Â To be quite crude theyâll be dumb, the kind of dumb that will maximize our profits.â
Bruce let out a low whistle.
âThatâs beautiful,â he murmured.
Holmes leaned forward.
âAnd how do you propose we accomplish this?â
âTransformation technology,â Slate said casually, like it was the kind of thing one might pick up at Target. âIâve partnered with some specialists. Ancient biotech. Experimental materials. Nanostructural behavioral rewriting. A little alchemy. The details donât matter.â
âSo they donât get a choice in the matter, I assume,â Holmes asked, at a confirming nod from Stone. He leapt to his feet, going off at the CEO. âThis is completely unethical, Grayson. I donât understand whatâs happened to you. I donât know about the rest of these men, but it will have no part in this.â He left out the conference room door in a huff.Â
Garyson tapped his foot. He said something into his ear piece. All of a sudden a scream could be heard, echoing throughout the conference room. The distinct sound of Holmes muffled curses gave the men lounging around the room a vivid picture of what had just happened in the hall. The room grew tense as Stone gave the rigid room a big grin.
âWhat matters,â he continued brightly, âis distribution.â
And suddenly the screen shifted again:
PHASE 2: PRODUCT-BASED DELIVERY
Elliotâs eyebrows shot up.
âYouâre going to transform people with⊠consumer goods?â
Slate nodded. He gestured to a large screen set into the wall.
Manufacturing details: produced by Jeep then customized by Graystone detailing
Key transformation components: Saltwater Infusion - Vehicleâs metal frame pressure-washed internally with Pacific seawater containing dissolved surfer archetype energy signatures.
Leather Treatment - Interior leather soaked in Sex Waxâderived conditioning compounds, optimized for inducing neurological chill-out responses and cognitive downgrades.
Cabin Vapor System - Emits micro-mists of sunscreen, ocean breeze chemicals, and âperpetual vacationâ pheromones.
Drive-Cycle Activation - Transformation accelerates with vehicle movement; vibration synced to mimic wave motion, inducing identity regression and brain reprogramming.
Testing: an oversized, aggressive, slate-gray Jeepâwheels raised, surfboard rack attached, smelling faintly of saltwater was parked on the side of the road.Â
An intern stepped towards it, you could tell he was an intern based on the way he carried himself, with meek manners and a sense of humility about him, his small body shoved in an ill fitting pair of pants and oversized blazer.Â
Obviously confused, rummaging around himself only to find keys that matched the unknown car in his pants pocket. Clearly exhausted, he shrugged and got in the car. As he drove, something started to happen.
The wind tossed his hair as it became sun bleached. His clothing tightened around growing muscles, before reforming entirely into a bright T-shirt and shorts. He grinned in a dopey sort of way as he cruised down a coastal highway.Â
âBrooo,â he said, voice cracking with surfer slang, âlife is literally vibes, man.âÂ
He didnât even know what an accountant is anymore. Totally carefree surfer dude. His brain just⊠washed clean. All he cares about now is waves, suntan oil, and saying âheyyy brahh.âÂ
The Jeep horn beeped with a jaunty little rhythm.
File Name: (F)JOK-SE-Football
Manufacturing details: manufactured entirely by Graystone Labs: THP division
Key transformation components: Injected Youth Hormones - Leather panels infused with proprietary AdoLEssenceâą hormonal cocktail engineered to induce teenage-body regression.Â
1/3 âbiological extractâ from retired NFL donors
1/3 stabilized adolescent athletic pheromoneeÂ
Contact-Triggered Hormonal Aerosolization - Heat from handling releases micro-particles targeting muscle density, aggression, and ego inflation.
Second Testing: Holmes Price sat on the metal bleachers, very angry at being forced against his will to come to such a place. The sixty-year-old CEO stood with arms folded defensively.Â
A football was tossed at him. He caught it reflexively, turning it over in his hands. It looked like a standard-looking varsity football. Except it wasnât: The leather pulsed faintly, like it had a heartbeat.
Instantly, his wrinkles began fading. His shoulders broadened. Hair thickened, then fell into the perfect teenage-quarterback flop that was quickly covered by a hat. His suit vanished into thin air. His brain rewriting itself in real time.
He blinked, confused.
âCoach?? Practice already?? I didnâtâuhâI didnât hear the whistle, dude.â
He jogged onto the field, shouting âLETâS GO, BABYYYY!â Not a single thought to his old life.Â
File Name: PR-EB-Gray Goose vodka
Manufacturing details: sponsored by Gray Goose liquor and developed in partnershipÂ
Key transformation components: Posh Chemical Additives - Infusion of investor approved synthetic preppy pheromones.
Youth Hormones - Same AdoLEssenceâą base as [REDACTED], reformulated for oral absorption.
Bottle Composition - Glass blended with micro-shards from upscale Vineyard Vines store displays, containing residual âcountry-club brainwave patterns.â
Blood Alcohol Delivery - Alcohol carries identity-lowering compounds that target verbal processing and color preference centers through bloodstream.Â
Testing: The glaring, ice-filled wine chiller caught her eye. She was in her forties,a mid-level marketing executive, at a company party that she was NOT enjoying, but something on the drink cart had kept her from leaving. Inside the chiller sat a single glass bottle of vodka.
It fizzed faintly, even unopened. The woman opened the bottle and took a sip from it directly. Her eyes widened, it was delicious. She quickly moved to mix it around with some fruit juices on the bar cart.
As he did so, her hair shortened, then turned sandy-blond, then popped upward into the perfectly obnoxious swoop favored by boys named Chase. Her frame sharpened into lean teenage athleticism, her face youthful beauty Her blouse rewove itself into a colored polo layered over an expensive jacket.
His voice cracked as she stared at the party of people he no longer recognized.
âBro⊠what the heck⊠itâs time for lacrosse practice??â
He left the party in a rush. Now a dense preppy teenage boy. The kind to grow up in a private school and never be told no. Sweater-over-shoulders energy. A bit clueless but completely harmless.Â
Slate walked between the presenters, hands clasped behind his back.
âGentlemen,â he said, âthis is only the beginning. If we can transform individuals through cars, sports equipment, beveragesâimagine what we can do when we distribute these globally.â
He clicked to the final slide:
PHASE 3: MASS ADOPTION â FULL WORLD CONVERSION IN 18 MONTHS
âAutomobiles. Footwear. Sodas. Toys. Gym equipment. Household appliances. Toiletries. We partner with every major manufacturer. We embed transformation catalysts into the supply chain.â
âWe donât need to force anyone. Theyâll transform themselves.â
The men around the table began whispering excitedly, the overlapping hum of eleven egos seeing their legacy written across the next century and the fear of ending up like Holmes if they declined.Â
Someone asked, âWhat about resistance?â
Slate shrugged. âTheyâll be too stupid to resist.â
Elliot asked, âWhat about government interference?â
âGovernments wonât be able to function now,â Slate said dryly. âImagine how easy theyâll be to manage when every world leader is a twenty-year-old dude named Kyle.â
Laughter rippled, cold and certain. The businessmen leaned back, satisfied. Every one of them imagined a world shaped like a beer commercial, run by the least threatening demographic imaginable.
A world of bros. A world they could finally, perfectly control. Slate raised his glass.
âAll I need from you is your funding.â
Eventually, a full scratching of pens filled the room, as every single businessman signed a contract, giving Greystone industries full access to their funding and resources. Yet as the last lines were signed, something began to happen.Â
Their faces began to get smoother, their appearances more youthful. A couple tried to sound the alarm, but their panicked shouts quickly turned into mindless grins. Their suits transformed into tiny shorts showing off massive legs. Their jackets becoming an assorted mix of tops: tank tops, t-shirts, oneâs button down shirt melted away completely leaving behind a bare chest, showing off thick muscles.Â
Stone watched all this with a grin, he already had their money, he had no need for these men now. He poured himself more whisky, as he watched his old friend Elliot complete his transformation. Elliotâs gained muscle quickly becoming a sun darkened tan, his hair gaining a touch of the sun as well with streaks of blonde running through it. He lifted his tie dye shirt and grinned up at Grayson flirtatiously but without recognition. Stone looked over the rest of the men as they finished as well. Their hair styled in various trendy dos, some covered by baseball caps. Some glanced at him with dull, glazed over eyes.
 He gave them all a final glance as he left the room. Knowing that his transportation department would teleport the room and the boys inside to a frat house in a coastal town. There had been many discussions on what would be the best to transform the investors to, options ranging from boy band to hockey team had been discussed before landing on the idea of a frat house. An addition that would be unnoticed wherever they relocated them, but soon people would notice the growing number of young men. Things were about to change, and Grayson Stone had many many many plans.Â
(New series, so excited!! wanted to do like short stories to help get my creativity pumping. This is an introduction so itâs more cohesive, but I will have more anthology kind of stuff in this series. Will probably continue this whenever I kind of just feel like making little one shots. Obviously this story is inspired by dumb and jockedâs the businessmen, all credit to them with the original idea. )