“Why did you treat me like you loved me, when you didn’t love me at all. Why did you fill me up with love, just to rip it all away in an instant?”
— and why did I let you?

JBB: An Artblog!
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Not today Justin
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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AnasAbdin

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Today's Document
noise dept.
cherry valley forever
YOU ARE THE REASON
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Janaina Medeiros

Kaledo Art
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

if i look back, i am lost

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@haveyouanyidea
“Why did you treat me like you loved me, when you didn’t love me at all. Why did you fill me up with love, just to rip it all away in an instant?”
— and why did I let you?
Crumbs
When you’re drunk
Is it her name on your lips?
Is it her intoxicating your brain?
Is it her you think of in our intimate moments? Do you see her in my eyes? Do you hear her in my laugh?
You have me wholly, I’ve given you all of me,
I am the banquet, laid out just for you, and all she served were crumbs.
You know how I taste, you’ve devoured me time and time again.
You only tasted the slight seasonings of her crumbs though, do you long to know her taste as you do mine?
It’s the not knowing though, isn’t it.
You know me. The sweetness, the savoury, the bitterness. But what of her?
The light salt left on your tongue, the staleness of the crumbs.
The mind runs wild with imagination of what it doesn’t know.
I’ve been you. I’ve felt this.
The longing of someone you hate,
Missing that person who ruined you completely.
I know how it empties your soul and makes you long to go back to those moments.
Anyone who doesn’t know, won’t understand.
The moments you were made to feel so worthless,
Then the crumbs come, and once starved you’re now full. Full of crumbs.
But the crumbs are delicious in comparison to nothing at all.
When you go to bed, Is it her you think of?
Is it her you want to kiss and lick every inch of?
Is she your last thought at night?
Please say no. I don’t want to go.
Please say I’m enough or
Am I too much? Do you miss the coldness? Is my warmth a climate you can’t handle?
I can’t be her.
I can’t be crumbs.
I want to be the whole meal.
I hope you love me for along time. I hope you don’t hurt me like I’ve been hurt before. I don’t want to start over again, I just want that wholesome love and I only want it with you.
You’re not even my greatest love, yet it’s been 10 years and I still think about you and how you broke me. I still think about the lovely moments we shared, even though they are heavily outweighed by the heartache.
I wonder if there will be a time that I’m free of the scars you left on my heart and the memories burnt into my brain.
“Knowing your worth isn’t always plain sailing. Knowing your worth is really fucking difficult sometimes. It’s saying no to something your heart really wants, over and over again, to the point that your insides ache because you know you deserve more.”
— Just because you deserve more doesn’t mean your heart will understand.
“And so, you’ll look for me in every person you’re with, and you’ll be disappointed because I shan’t be found. There is only one me. There is only one you. There was only one ‘us’.”
— you will never have another love like mine, for it belongs to me. And I will never have another love like yours.
“On a rare occasion I’ll smoke after I brush my teeth, usually when I can’t sleep and the silent hours of the lonely night take its toll on my mind. When I do this, I wake up with the taste of your nicotine kisses.”
— you’re in everything I do.
“Remember how we would lay in bed, and I would trace the edges of your hands? Remember how you would look at me, like you actually cared? Remember when I said I wasn’t attached and you knew I was lying? Remember how you never cut me off like you said you would? Remember how you would stroke my face, and run your fingers through my hair after fucking? Remember when I asked you to fuck me “lovely”, not rough, and you did? Remember how you told me I wasn’t to fall in love? Remember how I fell In love?”
— Remember how I was never enough, even though I gave you my world? Remember how you tore me apart?
““I love you!” I cried. “Love? I don’t think you love me. Lust for me, but not love.” You replied, like you had rehearsed it over and over in your head. You knew damn well I loved you, you were just too greedy to stick to your words and cut me off when I got attached. How dare you belittle my feelings to lust, when I was the one who cried every train ride home, I was the one curled up on my bed howling at the moon to ease the pain in my heart, begging the silence of the night to let me breathe easy again.”
— lust does not break hearts like you broke mine.
read me!!!!
Hallstatt, Austria | by jamesrelfdyer
“Being in love with you felt like being stuck in a trance. It was sleep paralysis only I couldn’t wake up Being in love with you hurt so much I became numb to my feelings for you and now I am left in a state of confusion. Am I over you or over feeling?”
— Untitled (Via @spilledinkandtears)
“All I want to do is get drunk or high and forget your name.”
— I don’t want to remember anymore.
I dont think anything hurts more than your heart aching for the one person who fucking shattered it
“Still got me on your strings, even though you don’t even know it. Still got me wishing you’ll message me, even though it’s been years. Still got me wanting to be your entertainment for the night, even though you broke me.”
— still got me.
“On a rare occasion I’ll smoke after I brush my teeth, usually when I can’t sleep and the silent hours of the lonely night take its toll on my mind. When I do this, I wake up with the taste of your nicotine kisses.”
— you’re in everything I do.