Thanks for your kindness, Nonny, so I hope you take it with the same kindness when I say, sometimes I wonder if canon and fanon get confused here.
Mostly, because, canonically, Carlos doesn’t do that much chasing of TK. Mostly, he lets TK go when TK leaves and TK comes back of his own accord. Or whatever happens, happens off screen. Also, TK offers Carlos emotional support in spades in the show, and I’m very confused by this narrative.
I suppose there are three major events I’d even consider under the realm of chasing:
We can argue Carlos chases TK in 1.01 when he is standing behind him at the bar watching TK have a good time before he asks him to dance. But TK doesn’t require a lot of convincing beyond Carlos’s sweet smile. He hops right out into the dancefloor and if 2x04 is to believed, things got hot and heavy within fifteen minutes.
In 1x03, you could argue it’s chasing, as Carlos verbally worries about having to chase TK and Michelle points out Carlos is just sitting on his ass, and he won’t know unless he asks TK out. Carlos asks TK out for a date to the bar and TK says yes, without apparently, much chasing necessary.
And then, we’d consider 3x04 chasing? But is it chasing if your ex-boyfriend’s work partner called you under false pretenses, because she knew that you would want to be there if he died? And you stay, but you’re not sure you should be there, and it takes your mom coming and knocking some sense into you before you say what needs to be said.
In other instances:
1x10 - TK says he has no idea what he wants or what he’s doing or where he wants to live. Carlos immediately backs down, saying if it’s not meant to be it’s not meant to be with the saddest Carlos cow eyes, and TK immediately hates that but was honest. Carlos insists on paying and doesn’t push, doesn’t chase. They spend the day working on that intersection when the solar storm hits and...we have no idea what transpires between Carlos calling TK impressive to Owen and when Carlos comes to pick TK up. Clearly they have a conversation, but who initiates it and what is said...Your guess is as good as mine. But as Owen points out, TK made a life decision that day. Then, they go sit out under the northern lights and it’s TK who takes Carlos’s hand and tells him they make a good team.
In 2x04, TK is very rightly upset by the fact that Carlos and he run into Carlos’s parents, and not only is Carlos very weird but offers no explination and is very surprised TK is upset. Carlos tries very hard to pretend that was a normal interaction. Bless his heart. TK only walks out after he says the line “Someone who loves you who you supposedly love back?” and Carlos flounders, unable to form words or sentences. We don’t know what transpires between them after TK leaves and before he comes back, but it doesn’t seem like they’ve talked much as TK knocks and Carlos throws out the passive agressive “Are we breaking up? Or did we already? Because it felt like we did.” What we do know is TK comes back and fights to explain what was going on with him, and then somewhere in all that realizes what was happening with Carlos, and it’s TK who offers to be the support Carlos needs. Carlos is very pleased to be offered this and worries that he may never be ready to introduce TK to his parents as his boyfriend, and that may not be enough for TK. TK stands by him.
In 2x12, post the confrontation in the firehouse, TK shows up at home to Carlos cooking a meal, which we know is Carlos’s form of offering his heart. TK tries to apologize for the firehouse, and we know that some sort of conversation we missed off screen, because Carlos said they already agreed to let that go when their dad’s filled them in on the plan. I want it to be so noted that Carlos is the one that rebuffs TK’s efforts to make amends here. TK backs off when Carlos says they’ve already handled it.
We watch TK center Carlos frequently in season three, even when TK is struggling. This man wakes from a COMA due to hypothermia in 3x04, and the first thing he does is tells Carlos to breathe and is the one who reaches out for Carlos first. Like, the pure strenght and determination to do that is crazy (and I don’t know how medically accurate)
In 3x08, TK is drowning in his grief, nearly relapses and then ends up on a plane that nearly crashes, but on the tarmac, when Carlos comes flying at TK, TK shifts directly into soothing mode for Carlos. He immediately assures Carlos he’s fine, that it’s not his blood, He holds Carlos’s face and repeats I’m okay until Carlos repeats okay back at him. Like, TK’s an emotional disaster at this point and still takes the time to put Carlos’s worry at ease.
In 3x05, 3x11 and 3x12, we see TK offers support in Carlos’s ability to do his job, in his ability to be a detective while he’s just a beat cop and “helps” with footage research. In 3x11, particularly, we see him use a couple of their key love languages with Carlos in the loft, including the loving teasing with “raging bull” which brings me back to Carlos busting TK’s balls in 1x03. And TK is making Carlos a salad, which is returning one of Carlos’s key love language of acts of service through food. Just because TK isn’t great at food, doesn’t mean he doesn’t put the effort into trying to give Carlos his love languages right back.
And then in 3x13, when Carlos is desperately trying to center TK and TK’s addcition in their relationship and making TK’s recovery his responsibility, TK doesn’t let him. TK thanks Carlos for his research and says that Carlos is on the same train of thought as Cooper. He calls Carlos sweet and appreciates everything Carlos does for him, and then moves to flirt with Carlos.
I’m sorry the stuff with Cooper bothered you. But was it Cooper specifically, or the way the Cooper stuff made Carlos feel?
Because Cooper isn’t just some friend, or a casual aquaintence that is taking up TK’s time or getting three am phone calls. Cooper is a sponsor, and part of their job is to be available to their sponsees as needed. Cooper has offered TK 24/7 support as a resource. But it’s not a two-way street. Cooper isn’t going to be calling TK at three am. He might call TK if he hasn’t heard from him in awhile or if things are signaled to be off. But it’s a mostly one-way street, of Cooper being a support for TK.
Even Carlos knows this, consciouslly, even if unconsciously he feels differently. Cooper is a resource that is helping TK stay clean. Staying clean is a matter of life and death. Addiction, left untreated, is a death sentence and we’ve almost lost TK to drugs too many times on the course of this show. If it helps you at all, think of Cooper as treatment that is keeping TK alive.
Carlos feels isolated and impotent and helpless, which is realistic. It happens to partners of addcits but it also happens to partners of cancer patients and partners of people with long-term chronic illnesses. I experienced it as the partner of someone who was transitioning. It is emotionally difficult to watch the person you love most struggle to live and know that there is nothing you can do to fix that life threatening illness. THAT is what Carlos is struggling with, in this episode, and Cooper is just the manifestation of that for Carlos to be mad at. What Carlos needs is his own support group, to manage these feelings as TK turns to people who understand what he is going through, Carlos needs the same.
The last thing I want to address is the Carlos putting TK’s needs and emotions above his. Carlos does do this, but it’s not what TK is ever asking for. TK wants Carlos to take care of himself. But Carlos Reyes puts EVERYONE above himself. I say it all the time: but Carlos is last on the list if he’s ever on the list at all. He would do anything for his friends and family, and even his job, at his own expense. We watch him lose sleep over cases, working them on his own time, be it Katie or helping Michelle or searching footage for Owen’s stalker. We watch Carlos put all of his feelings and needs in a box so that his parents won’t decide they don’t love him if he is just a little outside of what they’re expecting, much to his parent’s endless bafflement.
But TK Strand, sees this part of Carlos, that will give anything, and TK gives back just as hard, and sometimes calls Carlos on this behavior. And THAT, man, that ability to let Carlos feel his feelings or to take care of himself-like in 2x04 when he asks Carlos to explain it to him, or in 2x12 when he doesn’t let Carlos get away with saying he’s okay after their house burns down, in 3x04 when he asks Carlos to breathe, in 3x05 when he tries to get Carlos to come to bed and when that doesnt work stays with him, in 3x08 when he makes sure Carlos knows he’s okay, in 3x11 when he makes Carlos a meal and also names his feelings for Carlos as he tries to pretend they don’t exist, in 3x13 when TK is the one who asks Carlos what is wrong, well, that’s TK centering Carlos.TK centers Carlos and fights like hell to be there for Carlos, even in the depths of the drowing grief and depression and relapse.
And that, dear nonny, is why I am a Tarlos fan. I know these two will fight like hell for each other. And that is beautiful.
