Thanks for your kindness, Nonny, so I hope you take it with the same kindness when I say, sometimes I wonder if canon and fanon get confused here.
Mostly, because, canonically, Carlos doesnāt do that much chasing of TK. Mostly, he lets TK go when TK leaves and TK comes back of his own accord. Or whatever happens, happens off screen. Also, TK offers Carlos emotional support in spades in the show, and Iām very confused by this narrative.Ā
I suppose there are three major events Iād even consider under the realm of chasing:
We can argue Carlos chases TK in 1.01 when he is standing behind him at the bar watching TK have a good time before he asks him to dance. But TK doesnāt require a lot of convincing beyond Carlosās sweet smile. He hops right out into the dancefloor and if 2x04 is to believed, things got hot and heavy within fifteen minutes.
In 1x03, you could argue itās chasing, as Carlos verbally worries about having to chase TK and Michelle points out Carlos is just sitting on his ass, and he wonāt know unless he asks TK out. Carlos asks TK out for a date to the bar and TK says yes, without apparently, much chasing necessary.
And then, weād consider 3x04 chasing? But is it chasing if your ex-boyfriendās work partner called you under false pretenses, because she knew that you would want to be there if he died? And you stay, but youāre not sure you should be there, and it takes your mom coming and knocking some sense into you before you say what needs to be said.
In other instances:
1x10 - TK says he has no idea what he wants or what heās doing or where he wants to live. Carlos immediately backs down, saying if itās not meant to be itās not meant to be with the saddest Carlos cow eyes, and TK immediately hates that but was honest. Carlos insists on paying and doesnāt push, doesnāt chase. They spend the day working on that intersection when the solar storm hits and...we have no idea what transpires between Carlos calling TK impressive to Owen and when Carlos comes to pick TK up. Clearly they have a conversation, but who initiates it and what is said...Your guess is as good as mine. But as Owen points out, TK made a life decision that day. Then, they go sit out under the northern lights and itās TK who takes Carlosās hand and tells him they make a good team.Ā
In 2x04, TK is very rightly upset by the fact that Carlos and he run into Carlosās parents, and not only is Carlos very weird but offers no explination and is very surprised TK is upset. Carlos tries very hard to pretend that was a normal interaction. Bless his heart. TK only walks out after he says the lineĀ āSomeone who loves you who you supposedly love back?ā and Carlos flounders, unable to form words or sentences. We donāt know what transpires between them after TK leaves and before he comes back, but it doesnāt seem like theyāve talked much as TK knocks and Carlos throws out the passive agressiveĀ āAre we breaking up? Or did we already? Because it felt like we did.āĀ What we do know is TK comes back and fights to explain what was going on with him, and then somewhere in all that realizes what was happening with Carlos, and itās TK who offers to be the support Carlos needs. Carlos is very pleased to be offered this and worries that he may never be ready to introduce TK to his parents as his boyfriend, and that may not be enough for TK. TK stands by him.Ā
In 2x12, post the confrontation in the firehouse, TK shows up at home to Carlos cooking a meal, which we know is Carlosās form of offering his heart. TK tries to apologize for the firehouse, and we know that some sort of conversation we missed off screen, because Carlos said they already agreed to let that go when their dadās filled them in on the plan. I want it to be so noted that Carlos is the one that rebuffs TKās efforts to make amends here. TK backs off when Carlos says theyāve already handled it.
We watch TK center Carlos frequently in season three, even when TK is struggling. This man wakes from a COMA due to hypothermia in 3x04, and the first thing he does is tells Carlos to breathe and is the one who reaches out for Carlos first. Like, the pure strenght and determination to do that is crazy (and I donāt know how medically accurate)
In 3x08, TK is drowning in his grief, nearly relapses and then ends up on a plane that nearly crashes, but on the tarmac, when Carlos comes flying at TK, TK shifts directly into soothing mode for Carlos. He immediately assures Carlos heās fine, that itās not his blood, He holds Carlosās face and repeats Iām okay until Carlos repeats okay back at him. Like, TKās an emotional disaster at this point and still takes the time to put Carlosās worry at ease.Ā
In 3x05, 3x11 and 3x12, we see TK offers support in Carlosās ability to do his job, in his ability to be a detective while heās just a beat cop andĀ āhelpsā with footage research. In 3x11,Ā particularly, we see him use a couple of their key love languages with Carlos in the loft, including the loving teasing withĀ āraging bullā which brings me back to Carlos busting TKās balls in 1x03. And TK is making Carlos a salad, which is returning one of Carlosās key love language of acts of service through food. Just because TK isnāt great at food, doesnāt mean he doesnāt put the effort into trying to give Carlos his love languages right back.
And then in 3x13, when Carlos is desperately trying to center TK and TKās addcition in their relationship and making TKās recovery his responsibility, TK doesnāt let him. TK thanks Carlos for his research and says that Carlos is on the same train of thought as Cooper. He calls Carlos sweet and appreciates everything Carlos does for him, and then moves to flirt with Carlos.Ā
Iām sorry the stuff with Cooper bothered you. But was it Cooper specifically, or the way the Cooper stuff made Carlos feel?
Because Cooper isnāt just some friend, or a casual aquaintence that is taking up TKās time or getting three am phone calls. Cooper is a sponsor, and part of their job is to be available to their sponsees as needed. Cooper has offered TK 24/7 support as a resource. But itās not a two-way street. Cooper isnāt going to be calling TK at three am. He might call TK if he hasnāt heard from him in awhile or if things are signaled to be off. But itās a mostly one-way street, of Cooper being a support for TK.
Even Carlos knows this, consciouslly, even if unconsciously he feels differently. Cooper is a resource that is helping TK stay clean. Staying clean is a matter of life and death. Addiction, left untreated, is a death sentence and weāve almost lost TK to drugs too many times on the course of this show. If it helps you at all, think of Cooper as treatment that is keeping TK alive.
Carlos feels isolated and impotent and helpless, which is realistic. It happens to partners of addcits but it also happens to partners of cancer patients and partners of people with long-term chronic illnesses. I experienced it as the partner of someone who was transitioning. It is emotionally difficult to watch the person you love most struggle to live and know that there is nothing you can do to fix that life threatening illness. THAT is what Carlos is struggling with, in this episode, and Cooper is just the manifestation of that for Carlos to be mad at.Ā What Carlos needs is his own support group, to manage these feelings as TK turns to people who understand what he is going through, Carlos needs the same.Ā
The last thing I want to address is the Carlos putting TKās needs and emotions above his. Carlos does do this, but itās not what TK is ever asking for. TK wants Carlos to take care of himself. But Carlos Reyes puts EVERYONE above himself. I say it all the time: but Carlos is last on the list if heās ever on the list at all. He would do anything for his friends and family, and even his job, at his own expense. We watch him lose sleep over cases, working them on his own time, be it Katie or helping Michelle or searching footage for Owenās stalker. We watch Carlos put all of his feelings and needs in a box so that his parents wonāt decide they donāt love him if he is just a little outside of what theyāre expecting, much to his parentās endless bafflement.Ā
But TK Strand, sees this part of Carlos, that will give anything, and TK gives back just as hard, and sometimes calls Carlos on this behavior. And THAT, man, that ability to let Carlos feel his feelings or to take care of himself-like in 2x04 when he asks Carlos to explain it to him, or in 2x12 when he doesnāt let Carlos get away with saying heās okay after their house burns down, in 3x04 when he asks Carlos to breathe, in 3x05 when he tries to get Carlos to come to bed and when that doesnt work stays with him, in 3x08 when he makes sure Carlos knows heās okay, in 3x11 when he makes Carlos a meal and also names his feelings for Carlos as he tries to pretend they donāt exist, in 3x13 when TK is the one who asks Carlos what is wrong, well, thatās TK centering Carlos.TK centers Carlos and fights like hell to be there for Carlos, even in the depths of the drowing grief and depression and relapse.Ā
And that, dear nonny, is why I am a Tarlos fan. I know these two will fight like hell for each other. And that is beautiful.Ā
