in which a stupid quidditch fight ends up turning into a lie they must act out.
ON PAUSE
i’m so excited to write this series!! i hope you love it as much as i do <3
the roaring of the audience was a weight on my ears, but a weight that i carried with pride. the stands shone in two opposing colours, the rich shades that brandished sworn loyalties to the two houses playing on the field this evening. on one side, a rich, royal red shone in scarves and jackets and banners, half of the students cheering for gryffindor’s hopeful win. on the other side, an intricate, sensational green tore through the fabric and demanded the attention from all others.
it was the game of the term, the last match to determine the winners and who was in the lead for the quidditch cup before we broke up for christmas.
the field was sodden beneath our trainers, the damp smell of grass and anticipation and excitement thickly saturating the air. i felt my team behind me, could basically feel their bated breaths and yet steady footsteps. approaching from the other side, the slytherin captain held a stern glare as his own team followed with firm grips on their expensive brooms.
i remember scoffing when the greens showed up with such fancy brooms one day. it wasn’t like the price tag was going to get you that win - no, it was the effort and skill that each player could have. i felt the thick leather of my gloves beneath my fingers, the protective gear that lay underneath my uniform that would lower the blow of a bludger. the same reinforcements decorated my teammates, and i felt much more confident spilling our spendings on such sensible things rather than on the name of our brooms.
we met in the middle of the pitch, a drizzle falling from the darkened grey sky. the slytherin captain stood much closer than necessary, much closer than other captains would stand opposite. i met him with shoulders squared back and my nose upturned, not even contemplating taking a step back. i narrowed my eyes, a challenge and a taunt. i’m not scared of you.
“malfoy.”
he grinned, a seething expression that held such evil intentions. you should be.
“Y/L/N.”
draco’s hard eyes suddenly set in place, any trace of a smile gone. now this was more like the real him. the rain darkened his hair to a silvery blonde, a bead of water dripping down his high nose bridge as he held eye contact at an attempt at intimidation. i felt the cold rain patter against my own face as i refused to back down, my own steely expression held firm.
a voice from the side of the pitch called out, “captains, shake hands.”
movement from below indicated that draco had slowly held his hand out, bare fingers unprotected against the rain. i scoffed internally. absolute fool.
i slammed my palm against his, leathered fingers meeting his plain ones, the tips of my fingers feeling just how cold his grip was. i heard the distant sound of lee jordan commentating on the game and who was playing, his bright voice dull and muted by the distance and the rain. “no gloves?” i asked, a smirk behind my question.
he breathed out a laugh, squeezing his hand around my fingers and prying out a subtle wince from me at his strength. his eyes twitched in amusement when i let the moment of weakness show, a movement i will forever regret even if we won the match. “don’t need them.”
and with that, he turned his back and mounted his sleek broom. i let my blank gaze flooded with hatred linger for a moment before also turning, directing a nod of readiness to my team and mounting.
the whistle sounded out, and we were a blur of colours as we stomped on the soaked pitch and whizzed off into the grey clouds.
the biting cold of the rain greeted us as we sped up into the sky, my keeper already in his position and eyes studying the quaffle like a hawk. i had my beaters on the sidelines, ready for use as soon as the game was in swing. my chasers were already in possession of the quaffle, and i watched with a sigh of satisfaction as i watched our formation play out perfectly.
to win quidditch, you didn’t just need to be smart or cunning. you needed the bravery to play it, the potential to meet a challenge head on, the guts to win. and if gryffindors didn’t have all of that, then i don’t know what we did.
as for me, i knew i didn’t need to watch them for any longer than a single second for clarification. instead, i hovered just above the action and kept my eye out for the glint of gold, or a flurry of wings. somewhere below me in the pitch, i knew the opposition’s seeker would be doing the exact same thing.
it was funny, the way things worked out. a boy who i already didn’t like was the exact same position as me, but in the opposing team. and not just in this particular match - draco malfoy and i were just as much nemeses as gryffindor with slytherins. and because it was fate’s funny way of messing with us, it just happened to be that the boy was in all my classes, too.
i fought the urge to turn and glare at him, because it would mean taking my attention away from my true aim in the game. the faster i caught the snitch, the faster we won the match, and the faster i could start gloating to the prat.
it seemed my own suppression didn’t have much use, because a moment later i heard a low voice from below call out, “head in the clouds as usual, eh captain?”
i rolled my eyes, ignoring his taunting antics and focusing on scanning the sky. where could that damn snitch be?
“what’s the matter, ignoring a fellow captain? not like you to back down from a fight.
i breathed out a sharp sigh. he was only trying to distract me. there was no doubt in my mind that he was busy trying to find the golden snitch himself, and one moment of my attention could give him an advantage.
“i always knew mudbloods like you were cowards.”
i whipped my face to the blond head below. my blood felt like it had risen to my head, a hot flush already boiling beneath my cheeks as i took in his insult. my grip on my broom grew so tight that it was numb, and it was a leering smirk that flashed back at my piercing glare. “i’ll throw you off that broom, malfoy.”
he tore his eyes, his smile never leaving his lips as he started surveying the game again. “i’d like to see you try.”
i knew what he was doing. i knew he was trying to draw me away from the match, trying to distract me so that i wouldn’t spot the snitch before him. i knew it, and yet i still fell for it.
in hindsight, i felt like throwing myself off of my broom.
instead, i tilted my broom at a sharp angle and dove towards him, the wind suddenly whipping my hair back and the rain now soaking my back.
as if he could sense the approach, draco snapped up to look towards my rapidly flying figure, his brief wide eyed look of panic the last thing i saw before he, too, raced off. a sense of glee flurried through my chest at the imagine of draco malfoy flying away from me - like usual - but it was dulled by the obscene insult he’d dared thrown. such a disgusting word.
the lulling tune of ‘mudblood’ circled my mind as i willed the broom to fly faster, tailing the blond twat with a determination to tip him over and make him regret his choices. the air tasted sour in my mouth as the wind whistled past my ears, burning the edges in a freezing bite as i grew closer. malfoy turned his head over his shoulder, taking note that i was, while closer, still about a metre away. he smirked, and called out, “i bet you wish you’d gotten yourself a better broom now.”
i bared my teeth, “and you’ll wish you’d never even gotten on your own, in a minute.”
with a final glinting in his eyes, draco turned his head back around and focused on pushing his broom further from me. then, just as i felt straw tickle against my finger tips as i desperately outstretched my arm, i saw it.
rather, i felt it.
a flurry. a gentle whisper. a buzzing flutter against my ears, whizzing past and blowing a strand of hair in my face in its absence. i whipped my head sideways, stilling my broom instantly. he hadn’t noticed that i’d given up the chase yet - but the snitch did.
the snitch could sense my attention, and it was just by a miracle that i suddenly caught sight of the tiny golden speck flying away by the edge of the stands.
i whirled into action, the front of my broom tipped to will it faster in the chase. the snitch was fluttering amongst the stands now, and i was just a few metres away. i would have to make the most precise, more delicate turn of my life if i were to catch the snitch while simultaneously avoiding a plummet into the audience. vertical or horizontal? should i try to lure the thing out instead of taking this risk?
no. gryffindors did not take the easy way out. i would go straight for it, and i would do so before draco could even turn around to notice that i’d long forgotten about the prat. i smirked to myself against the whipping wind against my face; perhaps i’d make a good slytherin after all, they were supposed to be cunning after all.
however, like a reminder that i was definitely not cut out for the house of greens, a voice boomed over the stadium. “malfoy has spotted Y/L/N going for the snitch, and is suddenly on her tail! it’s a race to the trophy - the points are tied neck to neck!”
i cursed lee jordan in my head as if he was the one manipulating the point system. poor kid; looking back on it, you couldn’t really blame him.
i spared a moment to glimpse behind me, catching a head of blond hair racing just a hair’s width behind me. i gritted my teeth, the sound of leather rubbing sounding out as i curled my hand tighter against the broom.
i had to do something.
this was the most important game of the term, and even more important when you looked at who was playing. this wasn’t just about gryffindor versus slytherin - this was me versus him.
i wasn’t proud of the thought that came to mind. i wasn’t proud of the itching behind my fingers to grab my wand and hex draco off his broom, tumbling down to the stands below. that wasn’t anyway to win a game.
i swallowed hard, desperately trying to think of a strategy as i willed my broom faster.
and suddenly, i felt a stutter.
i jolted for a moment, my heart dropping down to my stomach as i haltered for just a split second. it didn’t matter how brief the interruption was, it was enough for draco to gain a head on me and fly directly parallel now.
i glared. he…he wouldn’t have, would he?
i flickered my eyes down, barely missing the small length of black clutched between his pale fingers, hidden beneath his cloak.
i could’ve growled. the prick was…he actually had the nerve to…to involve magic now?
oh, all fucking rules and morals were off the table now.
i grabbed my wand that was stuffed into my boot, ripping it away with a force strong enough to create wind. keeping my eyes focused on the snitch’s hurried path, i quickly uttered the first spell that came to mind.
with a swish, draco had no choice but the urgently dodge the spell that came his way, watching as it missed his figure and crash into a flag behind us. the flag suddenly crumbled, falling to the ground in a sigh of defeat.
his head whirled back to me, outrage in his features. “how dare you? you could’ve killed me!”
“yeah, my bad,” i called back, tipping my broom as the snitch dipped a few inches. “for missing.”
i heard a sound close to a growl from my side, and just nearly missed the flash of light coming from his wand aiming straight at me. somewhere from the corner of my vision, i also saw a dark object come hurling my direction, heading straight for my face if i didn’t duck urgently.
without any other options, i could only drop my broom two metres in the air to avoid both spell and bludger, heart thudding in my ears as i thought through what could’ve happened if i was caught by either one. with the snitch now lost, i spared a moment to look up.
the spell draco had cast smashed into the furious bludger, the impact somehow causing the bludger to continue even faster (however possible).
i would’ve looked away, but instead furrowed my brows and squinted as i was sure my eyes deceived me. draco also haltered in the air, head swivelled to follow the rogue bludger.
it seemed…to have turned orange?
i puzzled. did draco throw some sort of colour changing spell at me? what was that supposed to do?
only when a simultaneous gasp came from the audience did i realise what had happened.
the bludger was on fire.
he had thrown a fire spell at me.
draco…fucking…malfoy…had thrown a fire spell at me.
he wanted to set my broom on fucking fire.
i had no time to start hurling insults - or even curses - as i watched the aflame bludger head straight for the wooden pole that the flag had previously been on.
with dread seeping in my stomach, i could only pause my flying to watch that rogue fireball sudddnly fly straight into the pole, a sickening crunch as the wood gave way to a magic flame.
it seemed to fall in slow motion, the pole cracking in the middle and then tilting backwards. the audience watched in mixed half amusement and horror as the flag pole made its way to the ground, then suddenly froze in mid air.
i swivelled my head to find dumbledore sat in the main stands’ box, wand in the air with a blank expression on his face.
this…was gonna get us in trouble.
-
we landed on the field with simultaneous stomps, our brooms instantly in hand and already making our way to a very angry looking professor mcgonagall.
our arguments started at the exact same time, both shouts something alongside the lines of ‘she nearly killed me’ ‘he started it’ ‘what a fucking liar’ before we were silenced by a stern hand raised in the air.
mcgonagall stared at both of us, her hard expression making me swallow.
“this is the exact opposite behaviour that i would expect from two quidditch captains.” i flickered my gaze away from hers, feeling draco tense beside me.
i exhaled sharply, wanting to argue that i couldn’t help it when draco had started throwing charms first, but decided it better to just keep silent. “not only have you disrupted the final game of the term, but you have put your teammates lives in danger, put your peers in danger, and caused a great deal of physical damage. if that bludger, god forbid, had hit a student - ” she trailed off, disappointment behind those thin spectacles. “let’s just say, there’d be more than a simple punishment in order.”
she turned to draco, “mr malfoy, a flammable charm like that would’ve been dangerous for a grounded wizard, let alone one flying hundreds of feet in the air.”
i couldn’t help the exhale of a laugh that escaped my lips, grateful that at least draco was getting his piece. i regretted it once mcgonagall’s head snapped to me. “and miss Y/L/N, trying to charm a fellow captain off of his broom? as head of house, i’d never expect this from you. 50 points.”
draco sniggered.
“each.”
“professor!”
despite having 50 points deducted myself, i couldn’t help smirk at draco’s outcry.
“you should know that the game will be cancelled,” yep, i suppose thats fair. we’ll just have to reschedule or someth - “and you will both be removed from your captainship positions.”
our heads simultaneously whipped up to look at our professor, dread coating each limb.
“but - but professor, you can’t do that?” draco exclaimed.
“i think you’ll find that i can, draco. and i must. i can’t leave such irresponsible students in such a authoritative position, it would be irresponsible of me.”
i stammered, “i understand, but professor, we didn’t mean any harm from it. we were just - ”
“we were just teasing eachother, professor. it wasn’t meant to cause any harm, not to anyone, nor eachother.”
mcgonagall stared down her glasses at draco. “with charms like that, you could do far worse than just harm eachother.”
“no, no. you see, professor, i’d only tried to aim that spell at the bludger. to protect y/n. i was worried that it would hit her.”
i cringed, but got the gist of what he was doing.
anything to save my captaincy, i guess.
“he’s right! and my spell was because i saw a wasp near him, i didn’t want him to get bit and cause an unfair disadvantage while we were chasing the snitch!”
draco subtly elbowed me, mumbling through gritted teeth, “it’s stung, you idiot. wasps don’t bite.”
i elbowed back sharper, warning him to shut his mouth as i watched mcgonagall contemplate our words. she stared, trying to figure out if we were lying or not.
“you should know that any form of magic is forbidden in a quidditch game. the game will be cancelled regardless of your motive, but…regarding why you casted those spells…am i not wrong in understanding that it is unlike your relationship’s nature to protect one another?”
i could’ve laughed. just the thought of us trying to protect eachother was ridiculous, but…it seemed to be swaying her. and so i kept up the lie, “perhaps before, professor, but that was a long time ago!”
draco nodded profusely, “you see, professor, we were naive and foolish. we have since seen the error of our ways.”
“yes, and of course it would never happen again. we were only casting those charms out of intentions to protect and…and to…to - ”
he chimed in save me, “defend!”
i nodded eagerly. “yes, defend!”
mcgonagall watched us with disbelief all over her features, but i could’ve sworn a twinkle of amusement glittered behind those old eyes.
“and why would you two be suddenly so eager to protect and defend one another?”
i hesitated, twisting the fabric of my robes between my fingers. “umm, you see, professor, we were just…we just - ”
“because y/n is my girlfriend, professor.”
my knees almost gave out.
our professor’s eyes sparkled with disbelief, a laugh behind that unmoving expression. i could’ve laughed, i could’ve slapped draco, i could’ve run away if just to avoid such a horrendous idea, but the sense that mcgonagall was about to let us off and that this ridiculous lie was about to work kept me planted in my place. my legs felt like lead, a sudden wave of nausea overcoming me.
“is this true, miss y/l/n?”
i bit through a tight smile, nodding. “yep, that’s right.”
she nodded slowly. “hm, well i suppose a simple mistake shouldn’t be punished with removal of captaincy. but let it be known that anymore use of magic in a quidditch game will result in disqualification.”
we simultaneously nodded profusely.
“and this match is still cancelled.”
we continued nodding. anything to keep my captaincy.
she stared us down for a further moment, and spun around with her cloak willowing behind her.
i let out a breath i didn’t even realise i was holding, relief holding me by the shoulders.
“you’re welcome.”
i whipped my head to glare at draco. “you fucking prat.”
he gaped, eyes widening as he went to defend himself.
“you dare throw a charm at me while im still flying?”
a smirk twitched against his stupid lips, arrogance floating across his face. “well, a good player would’ve known to dodge it.”
“a good player wouldn’t have had to resort to hexes to win a game, malfoy.”
he glared. “i just saved our asses, didn’t i? you’re still captain of the gryffs, so what’s the issue?”
i pointed the end of my broom at him, “you. you’re the issue. what, we’re just gonna have to be a couple to mcgonagall now?”
draco shook his head. “of course not.”
i lowered the broom, furrowing my brows.
“we have to pretend in front of many more people if it’s to keep us out of trouble.”
i raised the wood again, ready to obliterate that smirk from his face before he turned and started running.
ass.
-
the dusty classroom was heavy with chatter, everyone excitedly gushing over what had happened since our last lesson - which was literally only yesterday.
i dropped myself into a seat near the front, the rows of desks already near full. professor flitwick stood at the front of the classroom, rustling through a few papers while we waited for the official start of the lesson.
a whisper of ‘quidditch’ caught my ear, a couple of giggles and something about a new ‘couple’ that made me whirl around and glare at the group of girls talking about it. their eyes were already on me, confirming the topic of their gossip session, but the chatter died down after i turned back around. i slumped further in my seat - no way news travelled this fast. i’d really hoped we only needed to keep the lie up that draco had so cleverly construed in front of the professors, but i seems now the students were involved too.
the clicking of the door opening made my eyes flicker towards the sound, the devil himself walking through with two boys trailing behind him. apparently, draco malfoy needed henchmen everywhere he went - crabbe and goyle certainly looked the part as they glared down everyone in the front rows.
entirely by accident, draco’s gaze caught my eye. his lips twitched into a smirk before he turned his head to his goons, mouthing something and cocking his head in a different direction. please, no.
the three boys split off, the other two rounding the benches at the back, whereas draco made his way over to my direction.
please tell me this wasn’t happening.
his smirk now in clear view, i quickly avoided eye contact as i busied my hands with grabbing parchment sheets from my bag.
the sound of someone relaxing into the seat beside me forced a cringe out of me. so we had to sit together now? fine. but it didn’t mean i had to talk to him.
“morning.” i hated the smile behind his voice. why did he seem to be enjoying this?
i sighed, placing my textbook onto the desk with a little more strength than needed. “what do you think you’re doing?”
he leaned closer, still facing the front as flitwick started greeting everyone good morning and introduced today’s topic. he whispered back, “i can’t sit next to my girlfriend?”
i elbowed him away, then snarled under my breath, “you certainly can. go find her then.”
this was so embarrassing. as if anyone could believe we were together. as if i would stoop as low as to date some silver spoon prat who dyes his hair.
i could practically feel every pair of eyes burning through my head. why did i have to sit near the front? why couldn’t it have been at the back?
draco didn’t get a chance to respond before flitwick called out, “ah, i remember you were good at this last week. tell me, miss malf - i mean, miss y/l/n, what was the charm for launching an object into the air?”
my jaw itched to drop. was this it? was this my life now? was i no longer y/n y/l/n, quidditch captain and decent student, but y/n y/l/n, draco malfoy’s girlfriend?
professor flitwick used to be my favourite professor. now, he was dropping down the list with every laugh he let out at his own mistake. and every laugh that followed from the other students.
i glowered. “alarte ascendare.”
he beamed, “brilliant, miss y/l/n! now - ”
i heard draco snigger to the side of me as the professor continued his class, and it irked me enough to pull out a quill and rip off a piece of parchment. i scribbled messily onto the paper - ‘what on earth could be so amusing to you? am i the only one horrified at playing this stupid role?”
i shoved the piece of parchment to draco, not even looking in his direction as i rested my chin on my palm with a huff.
a few moments later, and movement in my peripheral let me know that he was sliding an answer back.
‘it’s not the role i’m finding amusing. i, too, agree that it’s horrific. actually, it’s your anger i’m finding amusing.’
i seethed.
‘i’m not angry. i just don’t want to be known as something so embarrassing and disgusting.’
‘what, like a bad quidditch player? a cheater who hexes her opponents? a mudblood?’
i read the message, my stomach dropping beneath the floor. i hated that word, hated the person who loved using it the most. i didn’t bother replying. i didn’t even give draco the satisfaction of seeing me angry, rather still leaving the piece of paper in the same position where he’d slid it to me moments ago.
he must’ve assumed i hadn’t seen it yet, as he nudged it closer to me while i picked up my quill. i ignored him again.
a minute went by, my notes finally starting to show evidence this id actually arrived to lesson, when another piece of parchment got slid my way, two slender, pale fingers pushing it toward me.
it sighed heavily. if this was anyone else, i might’ve laughed at the immaturity of the situation. but it wasn’t, and so all i did was side eye the message.
‘relax, i was joking. you’re an alright player, and maybe not a cheater.’
was that supposed to be funny? not addressing the last comment?
another minute of silence before another message made its way over. this time, a stupid sad face was drawn in the corner.
‘come on girlfriend, don’t ignore your boyfriend.’
i couldn’t help a reaction this time, grabbing the parchment and scrunching it up in my hand. i still avoided his eye contact, feeling a sense of childish achievement at his scoff under his breath.
i started concentrating on my notes again, my quill fighting to keep up with what flitwick wrote on the board. charms would never get easier, and this term was already kicking my -
‘would it help if i called myself a bad name? ok, fine, im a blood traitor. you know, dating you and all.’
i sucked in air through my teeth, and this time i couldn’t help replying. my scribble was messy and careless, but purposefully done. ‘would you just fuck off?’
minutes later, the next reply came.
‘are you breaking up with me?’
i tutted at it, shaking my head before going back to my notes. a minute later, i realised draco finally took the message and wasn’t going to reply. a few seconds after that, i realised i’d somehow taken amusement in his note, and was sporting a secret smile drifting on my lips.
i dropped the expression immediately, a blank face stuck stubbornly to my features instead. and when i looked up to the front of the class, i met professor flitwick’s gaze, who seemed to have seen the whole exchange go down.
i nearly swallowed in sudden panic, the thought of being caught in a lie a horrible possibility, but then noticed the twinkle behind his small eyes. the professor subtly smiled to himself as he demonstrated wand movements, as if enjoying our spectacle. as if we had really acted the part and believing my annoyance was fake. as if…he knew something we didn’t.
i crossed my brows. yep, he was definitely no longer top of my list.
in which pansy almost interrupts an important private session.
Pansy let her hands hover over the wood, hesitating before she knocked. Was this a good idea? What if he was asleep? What if he wasn’t interested? What if she just came back tomorr-
No.
She was a Parkinson. She was pureblood, one of the richest at that. She wasn’t afraid of some silly boy. Even if that so-called silly boy was the definite die-for love of her life. She shook off her doubts, and let her knuckles lightly rap at the door.
She put her hands down, watching the candlelight flicker at the dark oak as she wrung her fingers in poorly suppressed nervousness. Why did it take this long to answer the door? Perhaps he was busy. Or asleep. She counted the number of knots in the door, a habit she’d acquired since he always took so long to answer. 7, just like always.
The wood was busy with swirls and twisted patterns, like a noisy crowd of flaws. On the other side of it, the room seemed silent. She was right. She should’ve just come back tomorr -
The clicking of the handle jumped her awake, startling her despite watching the door the whole time. She straightened, then desperately reminded herself to keep her composure. Keep cool. Keep calm.
The door slowly swung open, and there stood the most handsome boy she’d ever seen. As she smiled sweetly at Draco - perhaps sickly sweetly - she only just stopped herself from flinching as she took note of his messy hair and loosened collar. His white shirt sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, and if his annoyed expression was anything to go by, she could take a good guess that he really had been sleeping. His one hand was on the door, keeping it half closed, and the other rested against the wall as if he was truly irritated at this interruption.
She swallowed her regret at this timing, pushed away her curses at herself, and called his name.
“I’m really struggling with this charms topic, Draco. I would so appreciate your help,” she lowered her head as to make her eyes appear bigger, looking up through her eyelashes, “if you’d be so kind as to offer it.”
Draco inhaled deeply, then quickly exhaled as his eyes briefly closed. His hand on the door moved, and she used all her effort to not look at the veins running down as he lowered it. Instead, she looked to what he pointed at with a raised eyebrow.
A tie hang itself on the door knob, neatly and purposely.
She looked to him, then back to the tie. Ah. Do not disturb.
She breathed out a laugh like this was a small issue, and ignored the squeezing in her throat. “Sorry, silly of me to assume you’d be awake at this time.”
He cocked his eyebrows once more as if to acknowledge her apology, and returned his hand to the door.
“But, you see, I just can’t get my head around this questi - ” and the door shut in her face, the tie swinging slightly as it clicked in place. Pansy let her lips remain parted, the unspoken words still hanging on her tongue.
When the next sound of a lock clicked out to her, she shut her mouth and huffed. What a day.
She turned and stalked her way back down the steps, a sulk in every movement.
Back behind the oaken door, Draco sighed at the interruption. Then, without letting the present go to waste for any longer, he looked to the side of the door where his other hand had rested. Or rather - where his hand was stifling your mouth, preventing you from making any sound that might’ve given the two of you away.
Your eyes were wide, hands clutched around his large one in nervousness, and he smirked down at you. “No need to worry, darling. She’s gone.”
Your heart thumped in your chest, the adrenaline of almost being caught - and now having that intense stare back on you - tripling your pulse. He leaned down, the scent of mint coming closer, the scent of expensive cologne grasping you by the neck once more.
Back on the other side, Pansy paused.
The tie on the door handle. She turned mid stairwell, looking back up to the dormitories. Why didn’t she notice?
The tie wasn’t green.
Rather, it was a pretty shade of dark blue. That wasn’t a slytherin’s tie.
The heir apparent lives through his rumours like a myth. At the Malfoy ball, a handsome stranger seems like the perfect person to voice these rumours to. And yet, why does he look so amused?
because the things i would do for a prince draco
My weight leant against the thick, white pillar, every couples’ turn on the dance floor making my eyes dizzy. A faint dance of my own tingled up my spine, the fizzy champagne slowly drifting through my system. The candlelights sparkled against polished marble, glinting off of silk, jewels, crowns.
The Malfoy family had hosted a ball, and of course only the most prestigious could attend. To be here was like flashing your title to the commoners who weren’t, a boast of social status. And yet, within, the competition was even worse; who had the dress of richer colour, who adorned the most lavish jewellery, who carried the best partner on their arm.
Fortunately, I wasn’t invited to such an atrocity. Unfortunately, all staff of the castle had to be involved in some way or other - whether that was replenishing the hors d’oeuvres, painfully stretching a smile at guests by the entrance, or attending to their majesties when they called - it was a call of duty. And I knew which duty I’d rather fulfil; the guests weren’t here to eat, they were here to mingle, to show off. That meant no one noticed if the person restocking the refreshments was simultaneously the one depleting the stores.
It was just as I snuck a small cake of strawberry and pistachio off of the tray that he appeared; a stranger, warm by my side.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, my lady, but that isn’t boredom I sense, is it?”
I looked up, unimpressed at the interruption between me and my dessert, and noticed it was a man. A rather handsome man.
And now I was slightly impressed.
I clasped my hands together at the front of my dress, the small cake hidden between my palms. “I’m afraid I would have to correct you, good sir. Who would dare sit in boredom at the Malfoy ball, the one that’s hosted per half-annum? Certainly not me.”
I subtly raked my eyes down his figure. Blonde hair was neatly brushed back, though half drifted near his eyes. The latter gazed around the scene with a calm content, like the gardens’ pond that settled in ice every winter. His attire was clearly costly, the colours darker, richer than any simple dye could create. His fingers lightly wrapped around a glass of something dark and coppery, and he spoke with such a smooth voice that I almost wished he’d speak again.
His lips gave a small smirk in response.
As the stranger leant against the wall lazily, one hand tucked into his trouser pocket, I guessed he must’ve been the son of a Lord. Perhaps a Duke.
“We shouldn’t blame the ball. Rather, we should be blaming your lack of partner. Now, what kind of noble gentleman would leave a lady such as yourself unattended to?”
I could’ve scoffed, but he was the type of person who was attractive enough to use preposterous words like noble and unattended to describe people and get away with it. Instead, I smiled up at his charming, smirking face, and naturally moved closer, despite the fact that maids didn’t get the privilege to even consider involvement with higher rankings. And yet - he didn’t know I was a maid, and so I indulged myself in boyish charm a little further.
“I’ll tell you what kind of noble gentleman,” I started, whispering as if the music might carry my words into the ear of the nearest busybody. “The Crown Prince.”
His eyes flashed in a notion of surprise, and then his briefly eyebrows raised in a motion to continue. “Here I am, a lady such as myself, unattended to. And, contrary to conventional wisdom, the prince has not yet invited me to dance. How strange.”
I smiled again, playing with sarcasm. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
He paused for a moment, his eyes drifting down my face as if searching for something. I considered if he was either considering how to agree with a beautiful lady without being treacherous against the crown, or just as dim witted as rumoured of the prince himself.
“Strange indeed.” His voice was like air, perfectly smooth as if he’d had lessons on how to talk - which, he probably had. The dancers twirled once more on the floor, dresses like silk around the couples. He then bent at the waist slowly, his head coming to the side of mine as we both kept our eyes on the scene. I felt the champagne work its magic down my spine. “Tell me, what else is the conventional wisdom on this prince?”
I bit the inside of my cheek, trying to stop myself from noting his scent in my mind.
I fought against a humoured laugh - the way he referred to the Malfoy heir as ‘this prince’ made it seem like he’d never heard of him. Either this man was from some land under a rock, or he was just pretending to not know him. Both were strange.
Despite that, he had obviously not caught onto the fact that I’m not a guest, rather a member of staff, and I was glad to keep up the facade for as long as his warm, tall figure stayed this close, and his scent lingered around me like another intoxicant.
“They say he’s over his head with his title. I’ve heard he has three servants to test each meal for poison, twice.” I glimpsed to the side to see he was listening to my words with a small smile playing on his mouth. He must’ve enjoyed listening to girls downgrade other guys. An ego thing, I suppose. “The girls say that the prince plays with courtesans like toys. He disregards his father’s law and takes any and every woman to his bed - and some whisper that it’s more than one at a time!”
He lowly chuckled, and I swear he took another step closer. I loved the sound. I loved the confidence leaking from his very fingertips. I loved pretending I wasn’t a maid, while committing borderline treason to a stranger.
He nodded encouragingly, a smirk still playing on those lips.
My memory ran in wisps before my eyes, and I remembered not one encounter I had with the prince himself. “The staff members all say he’s so hotheaded that he doesn’t ever show himself before them. As if w - as if they aren’t deserving enough to see him.”
He hummed in bare amusement. I noticed a long finger tap against his glass. The ring he wore made a little clink as he did so, almost to the lulling beat of the classical music drifting from the orchestra.
I tilted my head closer, both of our eyes still looking to the dances but focused on each other. “You know, they say he’s as arrogant as his father.”
He suddenly bellowed a laughed, his head thrown back in amusement. When he opened his eyes and looked at me, a glint sparkled within them - either a playful reflection of the candlelight, or something else.
“I must say, the rumours are very creative.” He put his glass down and forgot about it, a newfound, childish joy hidden in his features. “Do you know the heir’s name, my lady?”
I felt a tingle of excitement every-time he called me by that ridiculous title, a rebellious streak that I couldn’t seem to wipe away. “Of course, who doesn’t? Although, it is strange that most can’t put a face to name.”
His eyebrow cocked up and he stayed quiet, waiting for my elaboration.
“Draco Malfoy. The crown prince is named Draco Malfoy.”
The man suddenly took a step in front of me, blocking the scene of the dancers. I glanced around what I could see of the hall behind his figure, suddenly worried about this proximity and suggestive position we’d found ourselves in.
His expensive shoes took another step, and I had to take a step back. My back met a cold wall of marble. His presence demanded my attention, and a sweet sense of danger echoed in my head. I was playing with fire.
His hand leaned against the wall behind me, his head slowly lowering ever so slightly. I was risking my head by allowing this. Every second, I took a risk closer to death.
But as his heavenly scent danced around my mind, I couldn’t imagine a better risk. A more tempting death. Champagne wafted alongside his aroma, heat blooming across my cheeks.
He suddenly dropped to a whisper, his voice deep and secretive. “I don’t believe I’ve introduced myself yet, my lady.”
I fought against the lump in my throat, trying to swallow but feeling that my mouth was dry. I defied the way he made me feel, and tried to logically think for the first time in about half an hour.
This could be someone who reports me to the prince himself. Or the king. I’m sure either wouldn’t mind using me as an example to put an end to such defaming rumours.
Dread bubbles in my chest, alongside adrenaline.
His eyes dipped, down to my still clasped hands. He lifted both gently with one hand, and then plucked the forgotten small cake as if a petal from a flower. Despite myself, I couldn’t help but think that it looked ten times more delicious between his fingers.
He admired the cake mockingly, that damn smile still evident with mischief, eyes still shining like diamonds. Eyes that moved to mine, and stared.
“I’m Draco Malfoy, the heir apparent to the Malfoy crown.”
He raised his hand, and took a slow bite. Pastry delicately crunched, and I felt my stomach drop. My hands turned numb. I stared at the cake that left his lips, all thoughts gone with the wind.
The stranger - the prince - brought the other half to my lips. I felt the soft dessert edging against my mouth, and I was half aware of my obeisance as he slipped the remnants onto my tongue.
Sweet cream melted on my tongue, bitter fear froze after it. He took his eyes away from my lips, and looked at me with a glazed over expression. An apology started to form in my throat, the urge to bow down creeping up my back.
And then he spoke.
“And you must be one of the maidens to my crown. I must admit, I didn’t think they came this beautiful.”
My lips parted, just as a messy strand of hair drifted in front of his eyes. I itched to brush it away, and I felt my finger twitch. I understood now. I couldn’t believe I’d been so foolish. There were no sons that dripped in such confidence, except for the son to the crown.
It was like the prince had the power to read my mind. The corner of his lip lifted, and Draco Malfoy grinned at his maid. “Do you know what you’re guilty of, lady?”
I found the ability to gulp now. I didn’t realise the sounds of the ball were muted until he chuckled, and it was suddenly the only sound I could hear. And then came the heavy booming of my pulse in my ears as he dipped his head further, his lips brought to the side of my ear in a painfully slow manner. His words were the melody replacing the music, my thrumming heart the beat to it.
I felt hot air dance against the curve of my ear as he whispered, “treason.”
he forgets to miss you when his head is buzzing with drinks and his friends are throwing around careless dares.
this originally had a part two and three as per requests but i would never forgive a cheater so it’ll never see the light of day again😇
his fingers soothed down your back, mindlessly trailing in circles while your legs draped over his. an orange glow flickered around you two, highlighting the movement of the slytherins around. students were getting themselves comfy, trying to find seats on the common room lounges and the carpets before the fireplace, all to prepare for another friday night of…the house ‘get together’, if you will.
it was hardly a party, just the interesting ones out of slytherin who weren’t too scared to stay up past curfew, with multiple bottles of expensive liquor passed between themselves, and silly games that stirred the night into entertainment.
you sighed and leaned further into draco’s comforting, tall body, appreciating the way warmth flooded from his embrace and also the roaring fireplace before you all. his head turned and his lips pressed into your hair, his subtle inhale sending cool shocks of adoration down your spine. he mumbled in a quiet, low voice, “you alright?”
you nodded against his shoulder, then returned the kiss against his cheek. you lingered there for a moment just to reply against his skin, “hmm, just tired.” you grinned and glanced sideways for a moment just to ensure no one was paying particular attention to you, then stuck your tongue out.
draco cringed and pushed your head away with a large hand, evoking a giggle from you as he made a dramatic deal about it. “you’re repulsive - you know that, darling?”
you settled back onto his lap comfortably, but this time with a faraway smile brushed against your face. a lazy demeanour took over you as the games started and people started randomly calling out truth or dares for people, draco’s ever present hand tracing itself around your back in a mindless manner.
your eyes started to grow weary, drooping heavier with every blink and every second that seemed longer by the tick. you felt your body start to sink further into draco’s body, and only did a sudden loud call startle you somewhat awake - “…and to the parents of slytherin, truth or dare?”
you felt draco briefly chuckle underneath you, then reply, “dare.”
the boy who’d asked instantly replied, a mischievous glint in his eye as he dared, “i dare you to makeout with eachother, right here.”
you fought off the urge to roll your eyes and call him a perverted idiot, a badly stifled yawn overcoming you instead. theo nott chuckled from somewhere in the circle, “i don’t think the princess is up to such a thing, rosier.”
daphne chimed in, “right? what’s the matter, Y/N? has exam week got you this boring?”
draco jumped in to defend you, even if all your friends were merely teasing. “fuck off, greengrass.” his voice dropped as he said only to you, “do you wanna ditch? i don’t mind.”
you shook your head, but started to get off of his lap nonetheless. his eyes followed your every action, slightly widened with worry for you. “no, stay. it’s okay, i’ll just go to bed early. see you later, love.”
you looked over your shoulder just to direct towards the boy - rosier - one last remark, “and, fyi, it was a shit dare anyway.”
a few laughs echoed around the group, muffling out as you paced your way up the stairs and towards draco’s dorm (he didn’t mind you staying over, in-fact he rather demanded it and had took the liberty of moving half of your robes to his closet).
while you dragged yourself into bed, draco had his head peered at the stairs until you were entirely out of vision. a voice called him back to the group, “damn. poor malfoy - missing out on his action tonight.”
he shook his head at blaise, scowling down at his lap but laughing over the top of it. “it’s whatever, zabini.”
“no, no. it’s still your go.” theo said.
pucey chimed in, “yeah, someone give my man a new dare!”
draco’s nose wrinkled and he would’ve retorted that he was not pucey’s ‘man’, if it wasn’t for blaise suddenly dropping himself onto the couch beside him. he draped an arm around his friend’s shoulders and grinned, “i think we keep the theme going, eh?”
few chuckles spread around the circle, suddenly everyone much more intrigued and, thanks to the influence of whatever was in the various half empty bottles, weren’t caring about the girlfriend who’d only left minutes ago. draco, on the other hand, was much more sober than everyone - not entirely so, but still enough to know that they were proposing something that would be risky, bordering on unfaithful.
he raised his eyebrows nonchalantly, “nah. i’ve had my fill tonight, you lot carry on without me.”
blaise tutted and dragged him back down to the couch, his arm a weight around his shoulders while random students voiced their disappointed complaints. he offered a sloppy, lopsided grin and poked his bottle of firewhiskey at draco’s chest, “cmon, lad. you scared?”
his eyes narrowed and the word set off a heated spark in his chest. scared! god, he could scoff at even the suggestion. he was draco malfoy, he didn’t get scared. draco grabbed the whiskey and took an aggressive, long swig of it, making sure to keep his glaring eye contact with blaise the whole time.
once he finished, he threw the empty bottle onto the space beside him and wiped the spare drop of alcohol from his lip with the back of his hand. he glanced back to the group, now facing apprehensive and excited eyes. he rolled his and sighed, “fucking hell. what’s the dare, then?”
cheers sounded out, just before pansy shushed them and swatted their wildly gesturing hands down. it took hushed whispers and giggling nods for the group to come to a conclusion, when eventually the words made their way into blaise’s ear from some girl in the year below. she whispered the arranged dare into his ear, a cupped hand muffling it poorly because apparently being drunk made it impossible to be simultaneously quiet. draco rolled his eyes again at everyone’s half there minds, then saw a wicked grin form on blaise’s face.
a tight curl gripped the bottom of his stomach as the boy forgot about his relations as Y/N’s friend, and sounded out what everyone else had proposed. “draco malfoy. you have been dared to go out there - ” his hand pointed behind him towards the exit, his eyes fixated on draco still, “and find a bird. a fit one, presumably. you’ve got ten minutes to get her in bed with you, and only then have you’ve won the dare.”
Draco’s eyes fluttered from the stairs to his peers, meeting the expectant stares with a familiar sense of need to impress. Why did he glance at the stairs? Was there something else he hadn’t considered, except the challenge placed in-front of him and the buzzing of the whiskey in his head?
Blaise’s eyebrows raised in a daring manner, and that was all it took for Draco to scoff and reply.
“Easy.”
-
The hallway was dark and lonely, most of the students already asleep or tucked away after curfew. However, it just so happened a hufflepuff student was wondering about after her prefect rounds, and Draco had instantly taken the innocent, big eyes as a sign that she was the one. Yes, this hufflepuff would be the one to complete the dare with him.
It took fifty three seconds to get her blushing, an additional five minutes and she was agreeing to visiting his dorms.
Three minutes later, cheers sounds out from the common rooms as Draco led the big eyed girl through - up the stairs and towards his room. The door opened, and he noticed a familiar figure led on his bed. With a roll of his eyes, his drunken brain scowled and reprimanded the obstacle to his success - who was this stranger in his bed, and why did she think this was the dorm, of all places, to crash out? It took one glance to his dorm mate’s bed to conjure up a solution.
Twenty minutes later, Draco and the girl walked out of the dorm with messy collars and scruffy hair. Thirty seconds after the round of applause from his peers (and just a split moment after he had sent the surprised hufflepuff away in complete disregard), he realised who the stranger in his bed was.
In the next moment, Draco realised his mistake.
-
A biting cold had settled that morning, but your thick cloak did enough to keep it at bay. You woke up to clouds that hid the sun, painting the sky grey and letting a dreary mood replace the cosy, uplifted one from last night.
At the memory of Draco’s soft, soothing touches and his quiet voice muffled within your hair, your lips lifted into a poorly suppressed smile. Since you woke to an empty bed, that meant your boyfriend had gotten up earlier and would be in the common rooms waiting for you - just the usual. The thought added a bounce to your steps, a quickening to your pace. The excitement to see him never dulled over the years you’d been together, but that was, again, just the usual.
Once in the common rooms, your friends and a few other slytherins were scattered around and sleepily conversing, and on the couch near the centre of the room was the familiar head of blonde hair, book in hand, waiting for you - just the usual.
You laughed to yourself and crept up behind him, then suddenly leaned over to peer at his face as your hands made to jump on his shoulders.
“Do you usually read your books upside down, Draco?” He jumped a little beneath your touch, then abruptly shut the book closed and threw it to the side as if caught doing something he shouldn’t be doing. As if he hadn’t even really been reading at all. An offish smile took over his face before he replied, “Yeah, sometimes.”
Your eyebrows knitted at his sheepish behaviour, and a small laugh left your lips. “You okay?” You rounded the chair and sunk yourself next to him, naturally leaning into his warm and comforting side. “Too much whiskey last night?”
You noticed the room seemed quieter than when you’d first descended the stairs, and as your attention briefly flickered from Draco to the rest of the room, you saw a few heads watching the both of you. At your gaze, the multiple pairs of eyes snapped away and their conversations simultaneously continued.
Not the usual.
A strange feeling crept into your stomach as you looked back to your boyfriend. He seemed to notice it too, as his eyes were now focused on the others around you and not actually on you.
Your head tilted further forward to force his attention onto your face. A little quieter now, as you called out to him. “Draco?”
His smile was just as weak as his attempt at trying to sound convincing when he responded. “What is it, Y/N?”
“What’s wrong?” With the dreary atmosphere, with everyone else, with you?
He shook his head, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Your reply was quick. “Then why are you acting so strange this morning?”
Draco furrowed his brows as if that was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard, and turned away.
“Are you just hungover?”
He didn’t speak, and the strange feeling tingled further upwards until it lodged somewhere in your chest.
“And what’s with everyone else, too?”
A quick shrug.
“What happened after I left last night?”
The silence was deafening, one emotion buzzing around your mind as you put a name to that strange feeling.
Anxiety now sat firmly in your throat, restricting any further questions. The last one was now lingering in the open space between you two, carried on the quiet and wordless air.
Someone else’s laugh sounded out from behind you, and that was all it took to snap you back into reality. Something was wrong.
You grabbed Draco’s hand and pulled him off the sofa. It sounded like a few conversations died out behind you to watch as you led him determinedly up the stairs, but you couldn’t be sure. You couldn’t really be sure of what you were suddenly so worried about, either - whether it was just the taint of unease in the air that morning, or the subtle, out of the ordinary behaviour from someone who you knew inside out.
Pulling him up the stairs was almost difficult, but once the door to his dormitory firmly shut and you let go of his hand, he stopped being resistant and just stood - back to you, staring at the floor.
You rounded his figure and stood a metre away, eyebrow raised. He still kept his gaze on the floor. “Well?”
You noticed his eyes dropping downwards, as if fatigued or troubled by something. He looked deep in thought, yet absent minded at the same time. You’d never seen this expression on such a confident boy before, and it scared you.
What would come from this confrontation, what you would know once you walked back out those doors, what might’ve happened after you went to bed last night - it all scared you.
He still didn’t respond, yet it was unclear whether mere seconds or longer minutes had passed. That sensation lodged back in your throat, but you pushed past it and ignored the way your own voice hesitated as you asked, “What did you do, Draco?”
If there was anything worse than the surely horrid truth, it was the silence. The dreadful, foreboding silence before the sound of your thrumming pulse breaks through it.
You couldn’t deal with the weight of it, and the inevitable question left your lips with a hopeful quiver. “Did you…cheat?”
That was when his eyes finally flickered up to meet yours.
He feared the consequences of his own actions, but he feared lying to you - hiding it from you - more. Despite that, Draco couldn’t bring himself to answer. He wasn’t a saint, sure, but he was sure he wasn’t a bad person, and he would not let himself acknowledge this hatred for himself.
But his pride didn’t matter. Not at all, because as soon as his gaze met yours, you had your answer.
Guilt was a heavy emotion, and it coated every part of his face until you could bear it no longer and turned away, lips tightening and eyes stinging. You felt that you knew Draco better than anyone, could read his expressions clearer than pages in a book, and in that moment there was no need for words.
But you still needed that satisfaction. For him to admit what he did. He owed it to you - that sense of guilt, perhaps some self hatred. “Why?”
He came closer, and for a second you thought he might be coming to comfort you, to hold you, and then everything would be okay because he would tell you how silly you were being, how misunderstood the situation was.
But he strode past and sat down on the bed behind you. It wasn’t even his bed, but his dormmate’s.
You kept pressing. “Was it a dare? Is that it?”
He ran his hands through his hair and then down his face.
“Who was she, Draco? And don’t lie to me.”
He groaned as if irritated, as if he was the one who had been betrayed, and muttered into his hands, “Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no lies.”
You could’ve scoffed. If you were watching a film, you would’ve laughed and laughed and then some, because what a coward. But no such sounds came out, and it suddenly felt like all sense of joy had been distinguished. Experiencing it in real life was indescribable; every moment was the twist of a knife, and your chest felt like a horrific war between hope and despair. Instead, you accused, “why, can’t face up to your own actions?”
He dropped his hands and met your eyes. “It happened, it’s not like I can bloody change it, can I?”
His tone was sharp and decided.
Your mouth couldn’t fully close. The shock had slowly settled in, and the pain was forgotten a little in that moment. His words were a slap to the face, but nature demands balance. Your legs carried you to the edge of the bed and, before he could even comprehend it (before even you yourself could), your arm drew back…and then snapped forwards with lightning strength. The sound echoed across the room.
His face was slapped to the side, and his hand instantly came to touch his cheek. Draco slowly turned back to look at you with a sting of red blooming across his face - half from embarrassment, anger, disbelief. It was satisfying, but his physical pain didn’t come close to the emotions you were feeling yourself.
He opened his mouth to start yelling, but you didn’t give him to chance as you interrupted.
“All those fucking years, Draco. Last night, everything was so…fine? Everything was perfect, just like every day has been all this time. You’ve just thrown away all those years, every single moment we - ” your voice broke off as water started leaking from your eyes, and it took a clamped hand to your mouth to stifle a harrowing sob. With your back to him momentarily, you aggressively wiped away the tears. No, he did not get to see you like this.
You turned back around. “Everything was fine last night,” you repeated with a more forceful tone. “I don’t see how it could’ve possibly changed so quickly - how you could’ve possibly changed so quickly. Do you not even feel guilty at all?”
He snapped, “of course I fucking do, it’s all I’ve felt since it happened!”
You rolled your eyes, “don’t give me that. If you were capable of such, you wouldn’t have done it to begin with.”
He stood from the bed and annoyedly retaliated, “it was only a once off, Y/N.”
Your attention was then drawn to the bed - his dormmate’s. Then to his, just across the room. Your voice dropped, mimicking your heart that had just sunk to somewhere beneath your knees. “I slept on your bed last night.” Your eyes met his. Realisation of what you were about to say dawned upon him.
“So where was she? No - where were you?”
He kept quiet once again. This calm tone of your voice was scarier to him than if you were to shout or slap him again.
Draco mustered up the rest of his dignity and managed to reply, “I just used this one here,” and waved nonchalantly behind him.
The knife twisted again.
“So you…you cheated right next to your sleeping girlfriend? You then have the audacity to sit on the same bed where you were unfaithful, while I’m sat here talking to you?”
You expected him to start arguing again, if not to defend himself then to call you sensitive or something, but he didn’t. He looked back up at you with wide, defeated eyes, and stayed quiet while clearly struggling to say what he wanted to say. What you needed to hear.
“I’m sorry.”
His apology made the whole situation too real, too final. The way his whispered words constricted in your chest and forced so many feelings to start clogging up your throat made you start to feel nauseous. The tears were threatening to come again, and you needed to leave. Just standing in the same room as him made you feel both sick and sad, and both in love and in hate.
You took one more look at the boy who you had loved for every moment of the past few years, and longingly smiled. You mourned for the Draco who you fiercely loved, who would’ve died loyal to you. Hope flittered across this features, then instantly died out once you spoke your last words to him. “I hope she was worth it, Draco.”
Once the door clicked shut and separated the two of you, you took a long, shuddering breath and tried to calm down. The thick oak stood in front of you, and it seemed like Draco Malfoy was suddenly miles away.
Your mind was made up. It was already made up from the moment he confessed via guilt filled eyes. He made a wreckage of your years of loyalty and love, he made a fool of you. To take him back would be accepting that - it would be making a fool of yourself.
If he didn’t love you enough to love you alone, you would not cry for him.
The common rooms now seemed unnaturally quiet.
Not a person was left, most likely in classes or breakfast.
How much time had passed?
The morning had been filled with too much silence, much more than you could bear, but this one was the most heart-wrenching so far. It wasn’t filled with the sense of doom, shock, or anger, even pain. Instead, this newfound silence utterly consumed you; morbidly peaceful, lonely.
-
He listened to the sounds of the cauldron bubbling, the occasional clinking of test tubes and the turning of a thick paged book. The smell of dust and some unknown-to-him potion thickly coated the room. His mouth was filled with bitter guilt and self loathing. His hands could feel nothing as he stared at them in his lap, unhelpful to his potions partner.
His senses were dulled, and one other deceived him.
His sense of sight must have been misconstrued somehow, because although you were only on the other side of the room, you appeared to be miles away. And he knew you well, spent years knowing you well - so he knew you were hurting. Yet there you stood unphased, working with your own potions partner who kept inching closer and closer (unbeknownst to you), causing a buzz of anger and something greener to blur his vision. He welcomed it, since they drowned out the constant aching in his chest.
But Draco knew he didn’t have the right to feel those emotions. After all those years of being able to understand you, having the chance to love you, he could only blame himself for losing you. Because there you stood - and you looked happy.
He thought he was being subtle, Blaise.
You stood by your cauldron, slowly stirring the pinkish pearl potion, a knowing smile trying not to spread on your lips.
As he held the old textbook and pretended to focus on the words, Blaise Zabini couldn’t hide his eyes glancing over at you every few seconds. His smirk was badly hidden, plastered on his face as if you didn’t know his intentions.
As he drew nearer, so did the scent of his expensive cologne. White musk. Patchouli. Notes of citrus, hints of mint. Undertones of masculinity.
Months had gone by since you realised the meaning of betrayal, yet you couldn’t help but inhale a little longer when Blaise was so close by. What made it even worse was that he was Draco’s bestfriend, but as the boy took one step closer to you, the Malfoy name dissolved out of mind.
Across the room, Draco Malfoy was seething.
Draco used to love potions, but that was until Blaise started making moves at his girlfriend. His chair felt too solid beneath him and the room felt cramped and stuffy, as if there wasn’t enough air to breathe. As if the cauldron’s fire was burning it all up.
People often didn’t like Draco - and he was fine with that - but his potions partner had really grown to hate him over these past few months. Draco never bothered to lift a finger to help, the absolute most he’d done was stir mindlessly while glaring off in Blaise’s direction.
He watched as Blaise leaned closer and said something into your hair, his voice deep enough to travel across the room but not enough for anyone to have heard what he said. Whatever it was, it must’ve been bloody hilarious as you stifled a hand over your mouth to quieten your laugh. He clenched the stirring ladle so tight that his hands were indented with the metal handle.
You used to do that to his jokes.
He couldn’t believe his friend. Wasn’t he the one who had made him do the dare in the first place? To begin with, Draco was angry with himself. Angry for going through with it, angry for listening to his dumb friends, angry for not working harder to keep you. But now, he was angry with Blaise. Steam felt like it burned off from his head as he thought about the audacity that Zabini had; to break them apart, to dive in right when they were most fragile.
Within that seventy minutes of class, Draco’s mind was stirring along with his potion. And by lunch time, he felt better than he had done in months - with a clear mind, and a concise plan.
He was going to get back what was rightfully his.
-
The hallway was quiet and empty, every rushed click of your shoes echoing out. You were late to class, and transfiguration was not a lesson you could be late to.
You were just running through excuses in your head before an arm jutted out from a dark alcove, and pulled you backwards.
Your head whirled around, caught off guard and ready to yell at the perpetrator. “What the fu - ”
“Blaise is the one who dared me to do it.”
Draco’s voice was low and quiet, painfully familiar. He was wearing that black suit that you loved, with the ring that glinted in what little light was available here. He released his soft but firm grip on your arm and tucked his hands into his pockets, leaning against the wall casually.
He made hating him so hard.
“What?”
A smirk tempted his lips. “So you didn’t know?”
You shook your head in confusion. “What are you going on about?” You willed your mind to forget about how gorgeous he looked, forget about how nice he smelt, how you ached to just sink into his arms once more, and forced yourself to just focus on the conversation. More importantly, focus on making yourself sound like you couldn’t be happier without him.
It was partly true - you weren’t ever going to go back to him anyway. But the absence had been long, and the heart had, unfortunately, grown fonder.
But looking at his smug face, as if he thought he had a chance at being able to call himself your boyfriend again, was infuriating, and drilled all thoughts of missing him away. “I must have misunderstood - it sounds like you’re trying to blame someone else…for your choices?”
His brows furrowed and he tucked his lips together, contemplating his next words. A strand of blond fell before his eyes. Your finger itched to run through his hair, but all it took was the image of that other girl doing it for him that kept you firmly distanced.
His lips then parted like he’d figured out what to say, but you interrupted with a sigh. “Draco, I’m late to transfiguration. In fact, so are you. Why don’t you spare the blaming and just deal with the fact that we’re already done?”
Draco shook his head and briefly closed his eyes in frustration. “Don’t say that. I can’t - ” he trailed off, growing quieter as if he hated the words that lay on his tongue.
Then suddenly looked up at you with that same old confidence, and got off of the wall. He stood straight as if ready to argue for his cause. “I don’t like living without you.”
You could’ve rolled your eyes, you could’ve scoffed in his face and flipped him off. Instead, and against your own conscious will, you felt your eyes soften. So did your voice, both uncontrollably guided by your heart. But your words were controlled by what was left of your mind’s stamina, and you wouldn’t back down. “Then live with the girl you cheated on me with.”
You let your gaze linger to show you were serious before you turned your back on him, and forced your shoulders squared and your steps even. His eyes followed you all the way until you turned the corner, where you immediately collapsed against the wall for support and took shuddering breaths. Your hand came to steady your thudding heart.
Saying no to him was harder than you’d like to admit.
Once upon a time, you would’ve given him anything he asked for, would’ve sacrificed anything just to make him happy. But that was before he chose to ruin it.
McGonagall must have seen the look in your eyes, because she let you in twenty minutes late with only a stern glare. Your seating partner must have felt your internal struggles, since the smell of expensive cologne was closer than ever before.
White musk. Patchouli.
-
Back in the alcove, Draco hadn’t been able to bring himself to move. He couldn’t accept he had lost you for good. He couldn’t accept that this was his doing, and so he continued to hate Blaise.
And continued to love you.
-
The common rooms were dark, lit by the brilliant moon that seemed to be at its brightest just for tonight. It was late, and it seemed the whole world was asleep except the two of you. Silence, except the sounds of his lips slowly working their way down your neck, and your heavy, uneven breathing.
“I know you’re the one who dared him to cheat, Zabini.” You managed through exhales.
Despite your accusation, you felt his lips curl into a smile against your skin. He chuckled, and the only distraction from the warm, wet trail he was leaving was his inching hand, playing closer to dangerous territory.
When he didn’t respond, you spoke again. “How - how could you do that?” The words were stammered and barely there whispers, and even you yourself felt annoyed at the interruption to this moment. To the bliss of his attention.
Although, he didn’t sound in the least bit annoyed at the conversation you brought when he slowly mumbled into your neck, “I’m so glad I did.”
The surety of his moves, the sheer width of his hands, the warmth of his body. Yeah, at this point - so were you.
Blaise felt like the luckiest man in the world. He’d only wanted to mess around with his friend and get some entertainment for that one night, and now it had led him to you, breathless underneath his touch. He wanted to lay you down onto the lounge and savour the night slowly, to push you over every edge he could bring you to and then see your face when he prolonged it as long as possible.
He moved back up to your lips, but didn’t touch them yet. Both painfully swollen. Your breathing was fast against his. You opened your eyes at the lack of contact, and Blaise boyishly laughed at the want he saw inside of them. He took a spare hand and lifted your chin with it. “What do you want me to do to you, beautiful?”
You could hardly breathe, let alone think, desire blindingly muffling your senses. You had the whole night, for now you just needed him to warm your lips once more. “Kiss me.”
He flashed his teeth, and even slower than he had treated you this entire evening, he leaned down and gently kissed you. You were in another dimension. His warm lips, both pairs aching with delightful pain. His cold hand, gripping your thigh and mindlessly, gently massaging. His scent, overwhelming you once entirely more. White musk. Patchouli. Every inhale was healing, mending what was now a faintly wounded heart.
Then Blaise heard the doors slide open. Someone stepped into the common rooms, closed the door, then the steps stopped dead before them. Not bothering to stop what he was doing with you, he opened his eyes to see Draco stood in the dark, shadowed hallway leading to the stairs, a good distance from the two of you but not too far to miss what was going on - and who with.
Blaise smirked, keeping direct eye contact with his friend. Then, he pulled away. The sound you made was quiet, but it echoed through the room anyway. He didn’t bother to check to see Draco’s reaction, and instead dragged his lips down your neck once more. Into the space between your shoulders. He felt you jolt as he kissed a certain spot, and kept his focus there. He bit down lightly, chuckled at the sound you made, and blew cool air onto his bruised work of art.
When he remembered to glance back up, Draco was gone.
-
His dorms had never felt so empty.
Draco felt like the unluckiest man in the world. Seeing you with Blaise on perfectly fine terms made him realise that, if even you couldn’t blame him for what happened that night, then neither could Draco. Even if it took him many more months, he would eventually accept that this was his own doing.
In the meanwhile, he would continue to watch without any solution as you slipped further and further away each day. He couldn’t yet comprehend that the moment he agreed to the dare, he already pushed you the furthest out of reach possible.
That night, Draco’s traitorous mind kept reconjuring up the image of you, eyes closed on the sapphire lounge. His chest tightened every time, and it infuriated him that he had nothing to do about it.
Draco would probably spend the rest of his life looking for someone like you again. And yet he knew that, as he thought about how you had smiled at Blaise in potions, or how you had let yourself melt into his touch tonight, that you would look for anyone but Draco.
what would you relent to, your pride and heart, or your soul and the forces of fate?
he touched my cheek with rough hands, the product of hate and lust from our very souls coming together in long awaited contact. he caressed my skin as if he was scared it would break, but his eyes would flash with an angry emotion that seemed like he wanted me to break. to be destroyed, maybe at his very hands.
it was probably a power thing. with a name like malfoy, i didn’t expect him to not have desperate under-layered need for dominance.
he was so close, but really, so very far. he felt like a hallucination - all because of his surreal touch of hands that roamed my body, and the warm breath that grazed my neck, my ear, my lips, my soul. it was immoral to be this close to each other. the figures on my shoulders bickered against sin and lust. my heart and soul bickered against love and hate.
he whispered something into my ear that had my senses heightening and my skin turning cold. small shivers would grace my skin anywhere that he trailed his pale, richly elegant hands over.
i was ready to give in. those sweet words, those mesmerising eyes - they couldn’t have ever been up to no good, could they? surely the image i had painted of him was just a mirage, a figment of some illogical hatred that stemmed baselessly?
i told him what he wanted to hear, and he replied by lowering his head. his every exhale was brushed against my lips, cool, warning of what we were about to do. a hand came to my chin, tilting me into the right position and authorising his ability to move me as he pleased. his other hand held my waist so firmly, claiming his soulmate in a sure hold.
we were ready to bind together - the fate of us was about to be sealed. just as the stars’ plans were about to slot into the form of lips puzzling perfectly together -
i woke up.
-
DRACO’S POV
pick a side.
why did i demand something that i hadn’t even done myself?
my rationality all commanded against the girl who had such a firm hold on me, the mortal who’d annihilated all my barriers and exteriors until i was just a frustrated shell of nothing. i felt a slave to her, especially when she would glare at me and retaliate when i taunted her. a perfect opponent. it didn’t matter if i was ever genuine with my insults and provocations, she always found a way to make them genuine.
despite my rationality, my entire being screams for her.
i didn’t know if i needed to control her, break her...or control myself, break my own structure of emotions - until i was ready to walk away.
i don’t think i can let myself have this.
just her presence infuriated me, made me want to hurt her like no one else, but i would have teared apart the heavens and raised hell if anyone else dared to touch her.
i was tilting against the edge; balancing on a thin line of two equally as cruel emotions.
-
NORMAL POV
according to freud, dreams are a figment of repressed wishes.
that’s why for the next series of long days, i avoided my repressed ‘wishes’ like a ghost. i drank a potion for dreamless sleep every night and ignored the enemy at any minor encounter possible.
my plan wasn’t going well.
the universe apparently doesn’t like to be denied of it’s imperfect course of plans, and was currently punishing me in more ways than one. my emotions were pent up in steaming, bubbling bottles in my chest, threatening to burst at the seams while i continued to go against the stars.
and then, my precious colours started flaking away.
first it was green, the colour of jealousy. the signal for house pride.
then went blue, the shades of serenity and calm. the hues of his eyes.
then it was red. the connotations of romance and love disappeared.
the days dripped by so slowly, my longing for the full palette growing by the hour. i knew that i’d never meant anything i said when i told him i’d rather exchange all the colours in the world for the loss of him.
fuck, draco, why did this have to be so difficult?
why did i have to be so selfish?
-
DRACO’S POV
the only colour left was red.
all the others were gone. i might’ve gone insane if i hadn’t managed to catch small glimpses of her throughout the day, seemingly the only thing that could keep me grounded.
the colour of gryffindor. the taunting shades of romance. the saturation of blood. the only colour in the palette left was red, and i’d lose it soon if we didn’t start...if we didn’t stop acting like fools.
damning the hatred for a second, i considered.
had i finally pushed her too far?
this was my soulmate - how did me claiming another girl as mine sit with her? how did she feel hearing me demand her to pick a side - perhaps she assumed that i meant i was already on a side myself?
actually, no.
why was I stressing so much? fuck her. how does she think i felt as i listened to her spit wishes to never see me again right to my face? to never deal with me for the rest of eternity, and would gladly exchange all the hues in the world for it? how does she think i feel when i hear her laughing with her friends, but avoiding me as if i was her most repulsive fear? when i see her roll her eyes or send another sarcastic comment to someone who wasn’t me?
i’m going crazy. i heard that’s what love does to you. I cursed my thoughts and shook my head. hate, I meant hate.
fuck. what?
-
NORMAL POV
i couldn’t solve the disappearing colours in the world myself, but i could relieve some of my built up emotions.
my only solution to that was in the library, so I delved in the books and studied for some exam that i couldn’t care less about at the moment.
daphne was near the back corner, surrounded by piles of parchment and various textbooks adorned near the wax candles that sat patiently on the table. it smelt strongly of acute flame and woody paper.
the winter was, in fact, finally leaving us. the weather was calmer tonight, only darkness but no crying clouds or screaming gales to accompany it.
one person lingered in the back of my mind as i journeyed here, pushed by the fingertips of fate. i ignored it.
“daph. you okay for a therapy session?”
-
we’re both undeniably, irrevocably, unconditionally stubborn - according to daphne, anyway.
“stop prolonging the inevitable.” she’d said.
i’d scoffed and was just about to leave when a certain boy walked over, immersed in his own book.
“theo? what are you doing?” i asked.
he looked up and grinned in recognition to us, seating himself in a spare chair next to our table. he waved his book casually, “duh.”
i plastered a confused expression on, “i didn’t know you could read.”
he sarcastically smiled, then gestured to us, “what’s the occasion?”
daphne spoke, “did you know about her and malfoy?”
he glanced at me, seeing my nod in confirmation. he slowly nodded, “yeah. i did, why?”
she rolled her eyes, “of course you did. what do you think about it, then?” her voice turned careful, as if she was treading on a sensitive topic.
theo smiled reassuringly, “there’s no need for that face, daph. actually, it’s kind of what i was reading about,” and that’s when something else clicked. truth or dare, where daphne confessed to knowing a person’s soulmate was a one sided thing. she knew about theo’s case all along.
before i could voice my realisation, he turned to the both of us as he shoved the book onto the table so the front page was visible. ‘all things love’ it was titled.
i raised an eyebrow. “have you found me a loophole?”
theo chuckled, “not quite, love. basically, after a bit of light reading, to cut a long story short i think i’ve been wrong all along - about us, about you, pretty much everything.”
i tilted my head at an angle, waiting for him to elaborate.
“well, you see, apparently soulmates don’t necessarily have to be romantic. it’s rare, but sometimes a person is gifted with just a purely platonic partner, and is essentially free to choose whoever they want to love - romantically, that is.”
we listened slowly, and when the words registered i grinned widely and took theo’s hand in mine. “so what you’re saying is that i’m actually just the perfect friend, and needn’t feel guilty for not being able to return your feelings?”
daphne’s voice started, “uh, hello? that’s still a problem - your feelings, theo. regardless whether or not Y/N’s just your platonic soulmate, you’re still like in love with her or something.”
i giggled at her choice of nonchalant words, grateful that the subject wasn’t necessarily a sensitive one.
he playfully rolled his eyes, “i think that might’ve just been a temporary thing. maybe even just me convincing myself that i was attracted to you - i mean, i smelt you in my amortentia, after all. but after i really thought about it...i don’t think i love you in that way, no offense.”
i laughed and patted his hand, “absolutely none taken, dear friend of mine.”
a sarcastic daphne rolled her eyes. “yeah, temporary. not, like, since you were six.”
for the first time in months, the slightest fraction of pressure alleviated off of my shoulders, and the first piece slotted into place.
-
he was positively, negatively driving me crazy.
quidditch was becoming unbearable with his stupid demands. if the other players felt the added pressure they didn’t show it, since they just got on with the drills and ignored the extra anger behind his orders.
it felt like a stretched elastic between us, threatening to snap at any point. my world was so muted, so thieved of tone that i felt like i was slowly turning mad.
it wasn’t until an evening after curfew that we met, probably courtesy of fate once more, in another empty hallway. draco was leant against the wall, staring at some painting of a well dressed gentleman on a horse that had wings, twiddling his wand almost expertly along his long fingers. the sound of my shoes along the floor made his eyes snap to mine, then look away in dramatised annoyance.
i exhaled roughly and turned, ready to leave him in the dark before i caught his utter, “coward.”
the candles seemed like they stopped burning, waiting to see what i’d do. the wind and rain that was subtle only moments ago seemed to have picked up aggression, preening against the window panes to hear what i’d say. winter gave one loud shout of it’s presence outside as i slowly turned back around, facing the boy who couldn’t even make eye contact with me, yet dared call me...a fucking coward.
“excuse me?”
he scoffed and looked at me pathetically. “you heard me. avoiding me for weeks? running away from your literal soulmate and robbing us both of colour? coward.”
i let out a disbelieved sound somewhere between a laugh and a sigh, “do one, draco. i genuinely couldn’t care less what you thought of me.”
he got up off the wall and twirled his wand around again, shuffling it tidily as he swaggered over, “oh? then i guess you wouldn’t mind me listing everything that i hate about you, right?”
i crossed my arms, sauntering over to meet him halfway. we stood opposite eachother in a darkened hallway, both feeling ready to taunt one another after so long apart. my desperation for colour had built up over the weeks without him, and if the tension inside asked me to put myself in close proximity with him to relive it, i could deal with that.
“be my guest, draco.” his name rolled naturally off my tongue, feeling like silk as it came out.
he took his wand and stilled it, studying me for a second before pointing it at my chest. “that. your soul, first of all. it’s what got us both into this mess.” he pressed the wand against my skin and brought it to the side of my neck.
my pulse seemed to follow the tip of it, quickening as it always did when he teased me like this. as i looked to him in anticipation of what he was doing, i noticed something.
his eyes. they were blue.
not just a diluted blue, but almost fully vibrant. his lips were still greyish, so all colour hadn’t been returned to me, but the excitement of seeing pigmentation had my adrenaline kicking in.
he must’ve seen the same, because his pupils dilated dangerously wide and he spoke again, a small hint of a smirk on his lips.
“i don’t like this, ” his wand briefly tapped, almost gently on the side of my neck. “ - it’s where all those shitty comments come out from, where all those smart-arse insults stem from. if I could, i think I’d like to take a hold of it and make sure it can’t ever annoy me again.” i refrained from asking him just how (and maybe when) he planned on ‘taking a hold’ of my throat, and instead rolled my eyes. i wouldn’t show him the effect he had on me. the feelings burning inside, the same that I shouldn’t be feeling to begin with.
he dragged the wand under my chin and tilted my head, studying me intently when my head was at the perfect angle for him.
he smiled widely. “i hate your face. it makes me angry.”
i mimicked his stupid grin. “we agree on something, at least. yours makes me want to commit unlawful crimes.” the rain congratulated me on my weak retaliation in louder poundings against the glass.
my heart quickened. pink started to bloom in his lips.
his wand moved further, and he finally stopped right in the middle of my forehead. he cocked his head slightly, closing one eye as if taking aim. “bang.”
a joke for a muggle weapon - classy.
i watched his eyes as they trailed down my face then back to my irises, flicking between each one slowly. “i could go on forever. but, i think most of all, i hate your mouth. everything that comes out of it.”
i laughed sarcastically. “that’s so fucking stupid. you’re so fucking stupid.” i roughly turned my head so get his wand away from my skin, and spat out, “my turn?”
he pulled his wand away smoothly, tucking it into his robes before nodding in go ahead. i can’t tell if I imagined the glimmer of something brighter behind his eyes.
“i hate everything about you. done.” he scoffed and looked to the side, “real mature, Y/L/N. god, couldn’t the universe had given me someone with more mental advancement than a two year old?”
i rolled my eyes and sighed, “yeah, because you’d know all about maturity, right?”
“don’t start, for fucks sake.”
“oh, i’ll start alright. you wanna pretend like you hate everything about me? fine, i’ll let you put up the facade for a - ”
“woah woah, who said anything about a facade?”
i laughed incredulously. “are you joking? don’t act like you’re not in love with me, malfoy. god, i’ll bet you wanna kiss me so bad right now.”
he grabbed my shoulders and slammed me into the wall. my eyes tried widening but i kept them neutral, desperately not wanting to let him see any ounce of affect on me. he glared at me.
“you drive me so fucking crazy.”
i breathed out a laugh, coming to raise a hand to perhaps tease him some more but only being slammed into the wall again - a warning to stay still. nothing in my body disobeyed otherwise, so i stayed put.
i narrowed my eyes, put all my frustration behind them because it seemed my own body was betraying me - “get your filthy hands off me, malfoy. i don’t know who you think you are, but you’re not entitled to touch me like this - like you own me.”
he let out a strangled growl that sounded too animalistic to be human, “but, you see my love, i do. i own the other half of your soul; i’d say that’s enough, wouldn’t you?”
i scoffed and dared to lean closer into his threatening face. “drop dead.”
“hmm, you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
i grinned, “sure.”
he copied my expression and cooly said, “i’d be sure to take you down with me.”
a moment lasted of the world’s silence, seemingly all the forces of nature and fate coming to push us further, and further together. we both noticed the colour slowly filtering back with the way that we scanned eachother’s face, watching the bloom return in our cheeks and lips, our corneas slowly claiming back the rightful shades, the colour of our anger and hate flourishing around us.
something snapped, and draco let go of me.
he pushed off, we stared at eachother for a moment, and then we both walked away.
pacing further and further apart, our backs turned as we widened the gap of the corridor between us.
and as we did so, the palette drained.
blue specifically clung to my mind in desperation, trying not to be forgotten as the colours around me escaped, and i wracked my memory for reasons to our feud.
his touch echoed in my body. his missing cool breath felt like it was hitting the side of my face, teasing once again. my way of subconsciously caring for him teared through my voice of reasoning, and i turned my body to see his back retreating.
something in him must’ve sensed my halt, him seconds later also turning to meet me. despite the distance between us, we felt somehow close.
everything started changing as he suddenly took rushed strides towards me, only a look of purpose on his face. my legs picked up and went to meet him halfway, gaining speed without any word of personal command behind it.
a few metres apart. his voice was dangerously low, toxically angry as he quickly said, “i hate you.”
three metres apart. i only had time to reply with a gasped, “i hate you too.” before he grabbed the back of my neck, tangled his other hand into my hair as i pulled him in by the sides of his face - and the plans of fate were finally sealed.
DRACO’S POV
a coil snapped.
all the emotions we’d built up had teared, pushed so harshly and desperately into this moment.
our lips were catalysts that fitted perfectly into place, releasing a pile of feelings deep inside my chest that i didn’t even know existed.
my chest had wound up moments before, so eager to push her over the edge before we walked away. now, having her finally so close, that wound up anticipation had sprung open.
i could feel some part of me being completed by a part of her - our souls. i’d read about this experience, but never did i think it would be this intense, or this surreal.
she knew my flaws. more than anyone. she’d studied all my faults carefully (all to use them against me in another one of our arguments) and knew everything i hated about myself, yet here she was with her hands clutched onto me, prying what we both couldn’t say due to pride from my lips.
i might not have known the little things like her friends did (her favourite colour, her desired types of days, her personal likings), but i knew her soul from the inside out because, well, it was the twin to mine.
i abominate my soulmate, and i made sure she never forgot it while i pushed her back to the wall and dug one hand into her hair, pushing her head up and her lips harsher onto me. she reciprocated the reminder by making addicting and paradoxical noises.
no, we could never forget about our hatred for eachother. it’s what drew us so close, what stemmed against fiery, intense and renounced love for eachother.
however, a kiss this full of emotion could make anyone forget anything.
NORMAL POV
there’s many theories that state one cannot exist without the other; white cannot be without black, good cannot exist without bad, love cannot thrive without hate.
maybe that’s why everything felt like it was coming into place.
it seems no matter how far we stray from the storylines crafted into the constellations, we all end up where we’re supposed to be in the end.
i think that when we pull apart from this, we’ll look at the things we’d done to eachother and wish they were all the more brutal. but for now, we’ll bask on the other side of the line of hatred.
who did we think we were to defy the universe, anyway? to reject their foreordained gift? to do so would’ve been a task we never could’ve been able to prosper with, not to mention the disobedience against the fates of our souls is sheer madness.
i knocked politely, hearing nothing in return. despite the lack of welcoming, i pushed open the dorm room and peered inwards.
it was the day after the yule ball, and theo had never returned to the hall. first thing in the morning before classes, and i was eagerly ready to talk to my bestfriend.
i found him stood opposite a mirror, fixing his tie with the barest of glances to acknowledge me. he sent a tight lipped smile through the reflection.
“you okay?” i asked.
he nodded, “great. sorry about last night, i just thought…you know. i just thought it’s better if you knew.”
i sat on the edge of his bed, watching as he finished tidying up his uniform. we made eye contact through the mirror as i spoke, “don’t be sorry. i’m sorry. it’s just...it’s so crazy. i really wish that it wasn’t like this - ”
“don’t say that, Y/N. you know we can’t change this, saying ‘you wish’ doesn’t help anything. but it’s fine, really. it’s been fine for like, nine years now.”
“i know, i know, but i’d hate for you to hate me or - ”
“hate you? i could never hate you. i guess that’s the whole problem, but god, hate you?”
i paused and pressed my lips together, “that’s the second time you’ve interrupted me now.”
he turned around to stare blankly, then suddenly broke into a chuckle. i giggled along, relieved that he was still capable of joking with me despite the...circumstances.
he shrugged, “i learn from the best, i guess.”
i smiled before i stood up and placed myself in front of him, blocking his reflection and saying seriously, “i need you to be okay, theo. because i need my bestfriend, more than anything, always. i’m so sorry about this, the entire thing sucks ass.”
he smiled and placed both hands on my cheeks, squishing softly, “it’s all good, love. in another dimension, i guess.”
i softly grinned at his actions and words, half satisfied and grateful that our friendship wasn’t going to end.
“maybe this is a good thing, anyway. i’d hardly want a soulmate who can’t even dress herself properly...”
i glanced down confusedly to see my tie missing and a messy, open shirt collar around my neck. apparently i’d been so eager to come meet him that i’d truly forgotten to dress myself properly...
my mouth gaped open and i slapped theo on the arm before sprinting back towards my dormitory, hearing only his laughter in the background.
yeah, we’d be fine.
now the only other thing that was bothering me; the way that a certain antagonist had held me last night - under the rain, atop the astronomy tower, nothing but relentless nature around us and his hands tangled in the back of my hair.
-
the feeling of hands in my rain dampened hair lingered for days afterwards. small, sarcastic jokes in light attempts of comfort repeated through my mind.
regardless of my brain not letting go of the moment with him, the days after the ball felt lighter. theo was never changed, i guess he was telling the truth when he said everything was okay. there were a few moments at night where i tried to imagine a life with theo - in more ways than just friends - but each scenario ended with a cringe and a pair of blue eyes taking over.
i wondered down the hallways, headed for transfiguration when i heard jogging footsteps down the corridor behind me. a blonde headed gryffindor slowed to a walk next to me, bumping my shoulder in casual greeting and smiling down. i recognised him barely - he was in a few of my classes, and played keeper in quidditch.
he no doubt belonged in gryffindor, seeing as he must’ve had all the courage in the world to ask, “Y/L/N. you, me, hogsmeade date?”
i turned to him with an incredulous look. “there’s no way you’re serious?”
he raised an eyebrow, “problem?”
i scoffed, “i don’t even know your full name, mclaggen. dream on.”
he mimicked my scoff, “cormac mclaggen, darling. come on, don’t be like that.”
i pushed his arm that tried to snake around my shoulders off, looking at him in subtle disgust. i dragged my eyes up and down his body, delivering a judgemental and dirty look that could’ve given malfoy a run for his money.
“apologies connor, i’m not into desperate people.”
i felt him continue to stare at my retreating figure before I caught the quiet mutter of ‘bitch’ leave his lips.
the insult made the corner of my mouth tilt up in a smirk. i turned my head to see him start to walk away, looking around to see if anyone saw his utter rejection. pulling my wand out, i waved it purposely and whispered, “furnunculus,”
i watched as he brought hands to touch his face and then look down at his arms, patting his entire body frantically. he started to groan loudly, yelling in frustration. suddenly, he whirled around to see me stifling a laugh behind my hand, giggling politely as he pointed a finger to me accusingly. his glare lingered for a while before he started for the opposite direction, to (i assume) the hospital wing, or his common rooms to hide.
as i turned back around, i saw malfoy leant up against the wall, one ankle casually crossed over the other and a smirk that showed he enjoyed what he just witnessed.
“badass, Y/L/N.”
-
slytherin versus gryffindor, the way it had always been.
only this time, it was settled in another quidditch match. the audience today were much more intense as we flew out in uniform, riled up to see their biased house win and push towards the house cup.
malfoy and angelina johnson shook hands firmly, madam hooch going through the rules. everything was ready for a clean, not-so-fair game (it never was when red and greens were both involved). the winter was still going strong, the rain drizzling down and feeding our senses of smell with dampened cool air. a small wind was whipping around, uncaring that we’d soon be flying against it and all depending on a small, golden snitch to win.
the whistle was blown and we stomped off the ground, against the forces of nature and ready to battle for victory. malfoy had lectured us before the game, yelling at us to win or ‘suffer the consequences’ for the next few months to come.
what I assumed he meant was ‘please win this for me as i’m such an unreliable prat and i need you to play well incase i fail to do my entire part of the game’.
actually, he wasn’t necessarily a bad player, but i’d never admit that out loud.
the game started smoothly - a few unseen shoves from slytherin, us practising the routines we’d been planning for months, gryffindor just straight out going for the goals without obvious coordination - everything was the same.
i threw the quaffle right past mclaggen and into the post, winking as he scowled at the announcer’s, “Y/L/N scores, ten points to slytherin!”
a brief flutter of wings flew past my face, making me call upwards, “malfoy!”
his eyes snapped straight towards me as i pointed to my right, earning a grin from him and a wink. he dived straight for it, the golden ball setting off on a chase. directing my attention away from our seeker and captain, i searched around for where the quaffle was again.
harry hadn’t spotted the snitch yet, watching as one of the red players flew towards their goal post. i instantly flew into action, chasing after them as the audience cheered for the thrill.
the rain was heavier now, truly coming down with intent on pelting us. our visions were all affected; especially those of us that wore glasses. the wind was harsher too, making me grateful that i had secured my hair far out of the way.
i flew straight for the girl who had the quaffle clutched under her arm, reaching her side in a matter of seconds.
DRACO’S POV
the audience were screaming - for the game, and also because they’d seen me racing after the snitch for about half a minute now. whatever was happening in the main part of the match was fed to me through the announcer’s updates, letting me know that we were in the lead by ten points. i knew the slytherins must’ve been working hard since the gryffindors were usually a tough match, but i had to grit my teeth as i saw crabbe miss yet another goal thrown past him from the side of my eye.
blocking his insolence out, i focused on stretching my hand out, trying to reach for the snitch and just get out of the damn shit weather.
“malfoy’s so close! oh, and here comes potter on his tail, it’s head to head for the snitch!”
potter turned to glare at me, so i sent a smirk back and raised my eyebrows tauntingly. “keep prancing around like that and you’ll miss the game!” i called out.
he rolled his eyes and focused on trying to push his broom further forwards. we were completely side by side now, both solely focused on the tiny, tiny trophy.
that was, until the audience had quietened into almost silence, gasps emitting from various people. i ignored it, thinking someone had probably just taken a bludger to themselves. it didn’t matter to me - not until the announcer called that a certain Y/L/N had fallen, courtesy of cormac fucking mclaggen’s bludger.
wasn’t he a keeper? what the bloody hell was he playing at?
a foul was called as well as the loud outrage from the green house, and the time out card that flashed. i craned my neck, looking to see what was happening. surely she’d only tumbled a little, right?
fuck, the rain was covering every inch of everything, i could just hardly make out a small crowd surrounding something on the field.
i dropped down instantly, flying to the blurred figure led on the grass.
she wasn’t even conscious. i only saw her on the ground, twisted in a way that meant she’d have a gruelling few days of healing to do. despite her gifting me the ability to see in full colour, only one was currently visible to me; red.
red covered everything. it washed over the field, diluted the gryffindor’s uniforms and directed me straight over to where mclaggen stood, clutching his broom awkwardly. he knew he fucked up, especially as his eyes widened at my approaching figure. i stormed over, gripping my wand from my pocket and pointing it straight to him, shouting, “stupefy!”
i watched, satisfied in the smallest fraction as he was blown backwards. he lay half conscious thanks to almost dodging my curse, scrambling slowly to his legs and holding his wand out with shaking hands.
“what are you bloody playing at, malfoy?”
i sneered at him. “think it’s funny to knock girls off their brooms in mid air, do you? all because she rejected your miserable, sorry arse?”
he spluttered incredulously, putting on a somewhat brave front. “god, i didn’t mean to knock her off. it’s a game, it’s what happens.”
i held my wand back up firmly, “what’s a fucking keeper doing, aiming bludgers?”
he looked around awkwardly. the professors had come down now, yelling at us to put our wands down. i didn’t look at any of them. i wouldn’t care for anything until i saw mclaggen bleed, at least.
“why do you even care, malfoy? it’s only Y/N, don’t you hate eachother?” it wasn’t cormac who yelled it, but a player for slytherin. i knew they’d be worried because if i was dropped out or disqualified for throwing curses, then we’d be down a seeker and forced to use a backup.
why did i care? he was right, i hated her.
i hated her with all my heart. despite fate, she was my enemy - a witch i despised almost as much as i despised myself for letting her break through my exterior walls.
and yet i felt that if anyone laid a hand on her, they should be begging for their life.
only because she was my enemy, and mine alone. only i had the right to hate her. taunt her. destroy her.
care?
for her?
definitely not. i hope.
i broke eye contact with the gryffindor to glance around, meeting the eyes of many onlookers from the stands. a majority of them were invested in the potential duel, the others more concerned for an unconscious classmate. my anger still felt dangerously high. i feared it might only be simmered by seeing Y/E/C again, in between eyes that glared at me, or even smiled.
god, i fucking hated this. how dare she make me feel like this - chasing after someone just because he’d hit her with a bludger and sent her miles below. i should be rejoicing - and perhaps somewhere, a small itch had been satisfied over seeing her pathetically strewn on the ground - yet i couldn’t help but feel robbed from.
mclaggen had thieved an opportunity by causing harm to my personal opponent. my fucking soulmate. i stuffed my wand away, not meeting the now relieved eyes of the professors.
damning everything, i sauntered over to mclaggen and outstretched my hand. he stared at it apprehensively, before reaching to take it in a handshake. at the last moment, just before his filthy skin made contact with mine, i retracted and bashed my fist into the front of his face, finally feeling fully satisfied at his figure toppling over and onto the ground - pathetically.
i smirked as he clutched his nose, trying to hold in the streaming blood that trickled down and into his gaped open mouth.
“mr. malfoy!” professor mcgonagall’s voice ringed out.
i met her eyes and smirked, “apologies, professor. he’ll need to be taken to the hospital wing, i suspect.” i turned to look at the rest of the gryffindor team who sent me death glares as i said, “you’re an oaf down.”
NORMAL POV
i woke up to see heads upside down and staring at me, surrounding my body as i came to. my head pulsed in thick and aggressive defiance to my consciousness.
theo was the first to exhale relievedly, “Y/N, thank god! we’ve a few minutes left of time out, you think you’re still okay to play?”
madam hooch clicked her tongue in annoyance, “you might have a concussion, dear. do you remember everything? how’s your head feeling?”
“i remember everything up to...the bludger. oh god, did i faint?”
my teammates nodded, smiling sympathetically. gross, i hated sympathy.
hooch spoke again, “we didn’t think you’d wake so fast, though. a fall like that should have anyone out for a good few hours.”
montague was the next to speak, “you should’ve seen malfoy. he was raging - punched mclaggen and everything.”
my head snapped to meet his, “what?! are you serious?”
he nodded with widened eyes at my irritated tone, looking around at everyone and wondering what he said that was wrong. before i could locate the prat and yell at him for being so utterly stupid, theo dragged my up by the arms and handed me my broom. “play?”
i nodded, ignoring my brain that walloped against my skull.
within a few minutes, we were back in the game and had thumped of the ground in syncopation.
i willed the rain to meet my face and wash away the incoming migraine, welcomed the wind as it gasped against my skin and cooled me down. despite my anger towards him, i flew to malfoy who was floating in the air, currently searching for the snitch. interrupting whatever he was going to say as he opened his mouth, i called, “find the fucking snitch. as quick as you can.”
he looked almost concerned at my desperate demand but shut his mouth, washing the expression away and nodding curtly instead. i dove away and headed back into the main part of the game. only a few more minutes - half an hour at the most - then i could go to bed, rest and fully recover from the relentless thumping.
the audience were cheering even louder at this point, slytherin being much more expressive because their team was still fully intact and unharmed. visually unharmed, i thought, as my head pounded and my hands grew clammy.
i’d hardly managed to add anything to our side, only bringing in ten points for us since the time out. within a few long minutes, the game was announced as over and we all landed back to ground level.
who had even won? i looked around while trying to soothe my pain with a hand on head, seeing my fellow players cheering in victory. ah, so slytherin had managed to win after all.
i was so ready to leave for my dormitories (or maybe even the hospital wing) before iced out eyes and platinum hair caught my eye and spiked my anger aflame again. storming over, i watched as the people he was talking to noticed me approaching and wondered away (one of them clapping malfoy on the back and saying something that sounded like ‘good luck mate, she looks angry again’).
i couldn’t care who’d see this confrontation, although most of the pitch was empty by now. we were barely alone as the audience and players all trifled back to school and away from the still ever so harsh downfall and vividly angry winds.
i got as close as i could bare, just enough that he’d hear the anger in my voice as i yelled, “in front of the whole school? really? you may as well have just announced what we are!”
his victory-happy grin was washed away with the rain, his after-game glow blown away by the wind. he scoffed, “a thank you would be nice.”
i squinted my eyes shut in frustration of the pain in my head, but pushed it aside to reply, “thanks for embarrassing yourself, i guess.”
our breathing was heavy and our cheeks were flushed pink, and i wondered if i looked as bad as i felt. he rolled his eyes, “i’m starting to wish you’d just stayed unconscious.”
i laughed in satire and looked down unbelievably, then whipped my wand out and pointed it directly under his chin and onto his adam’s apple. “say that again, malfoy.”
his throat bobbed, but despite his anticipation he still smirked and leant even closer, “go on, i dare you. oh, just to be cursed at your hands - what a heavenly fate.”
he looked too calm now. almost amused. fuck, i wanted to absolutely destroy him. i tipped the wand harsher into his skin, watching as his arms came up in mock defeat. his smirk was ever present as i lowly drawled, “god, you have no idea the harm i want to bring to you right now.”
his blue gaze flashed before his voice turned dangerous and he purred, “hmm, sounds nice. you don’t have any idea either; what i want to do to you,” he paused to grin, glancing at my wand and back to my eyes, “...rip you apart.”
i glared at him in forced disgust, defying the tingle that toxically rinsed down my spine at his insinuated, sinful words. a series of equally as immoral and obscene images flashed through my head, a concoction of my soul that lusted for the wrong things.
draco was still at arms length away, courtesy of my wand pressed firmly against his neck. a more vibrant throb of pain wracked throughout my skull, threatening to bring me to my knees. it was only getting worse, especially as my goddamn soulmate was whispering such beautifully unrighteous things that sounded just so sinfully delicious.
my upheld arm started shaking; or maybe it didn’t, i wasn’t sure. my vision was slowly blurring further than the weather had previously caused, and wisps of weakness ambushed my knees - at this point i was standing on complete instability. i only managed to mumble a short, “in your dreams,” before i became subject to darkness, letting my body give in to exactly what it wanted - sweet and blissful unconsciousness.
i never met the feeling of rain saturated grass, or even felt too far of a fall. instead, the warmth of two arms coming to hold me up saved me, their familiar voice echoing from somewhere in the distance.
-
“is it really true, i fainted twice?”
i spoke through closed eyes, the scent of strange herbs and medicine along with a sharp white light telling me that i was in the hospital wing. i heard someone talking in a deep voice, so i interrupted whoever it was to ask that question.
the guy chuckled, “yeah.”
i smiled and opened a single eye. theo.
he grinned. daphne was sat on a chair next to me, holding one of my hands while theo was leant against the very edge of the bed.
“you’re ridiculous, Y/N. why didn’t you just tell us you still weren’t feeling well?”
i rolled my eyes, “don’t act like you’re not appreciative of me - i won.”
daphne scoffed, “okay? we would’ve won with or without you in the last twenty minutes anyway. if only you weren’t so stubborn, then you wouldn’t have had to be carried here - by malfoy, might i add.”
twenty minutes? was that really how long the last portion of the game lasted? it didn’t feel that long.
oh.
wait.
what did she say?
carried here...by malfoy?
daphne must’ve seen the change of expressions proceed across my features because she giggled and said, “yeah, we were just as surprised. could you imagine our faces when he’d walked in, soaked through, holding you bridal style and grumbling something about - ” she put her arms up in a pretend flexed position and changed her voice to sound deeper, mimicking draco, “‘take care of her, can’t believe i had to carry her all the way here.’ like, god, malfoy. no need to boast of your almighty strength.”
theo chuckled as i listened intently, half embarrassed and half almost disgusted that he’d made such contact with me.
yeah, but then why was my face heating up at this information?
“whatever, it’s happened and we won, who cares. how long have i actually been out for?”
theo replied this time, “only a couple of hours. it’s dinner now, by the way. madam pomfrey says you can leave whenever you feel better, but make sure you’re not doing anything ‘physically challenging’ for at least the rest of this week. in fact, she’s got some medicine for you - speeds up the healing, supposedly.”
i smiled in gratitude as he handed me some bottle of small tablets from the desk beside me, dry swallowing two as the label prescribed. “‘take two before meals’. well, my friends, to the great hall?”
-
a few gryffindors sent apologetic or empathetic smiles at me as i walked past, the most genuine ones being from those weasley twins who played as beaters. i only smiled back at the redheads because, despite not really caring for their younger brother, their practical jokes had always made me laugh along with them. at my kindness that was rarely publicly shown, they took it as a positive sign and one of them spoke up from their table, “sorry about today, Y/L/N. i don’t think mclaggen can handle defeat very well.”
i nodded and smiled, “or rejection, apparently.” they both chuckled in response before i slipped into the slytherin table, where immediately they started hurling questions and throwing insults towards mclaggen, congratulating me for playing so well. house pride, i thought, because i played absolutely awfully in the last part, and that deserved no praise.
after replying to the bombard of comments, my eyes drifted down the table in search of someone. they met their target almost instantly, only to see that he was already looking at me.
his chin was rested in his hand, ever so lazily watching. i pushed my pride aside and turned the corners of my lips up into a somewhat smile, hoping it showed an ounce of gratitude, to which he just raised an eyebrow back, amused.
stupid prat, i shouldn’t have even bothered.
i blocked him out and turned just in time to see blaise utter something in daphne’s ear, making her giggle as he gazed down at her, completely infatuated. i nudged daphne to get her attention, seeing her hazy eyes that looked like they were mid daydream look at me. she hummed in question.
i mouthed ‘blaise?’ before she grinned and gestured me closer. i moved so she could easily whisper into my ear, “i can see in colour now; thanks to a certain someone.”
my mouth parted slightly and my eyebrows raised. i looked behind her shoulder to see blaise smirking and nodding in confirmation, so i slapped daphne on the arm.
she made a sound of pain, “what the hell, Y/N?”
“that’s what you get for telling me so late. when did you even find out? god, what kind of friend are you?” i was teasing but also half serious - she’d found a soulmate in zabini and didn’t think to tell me?
she looked away almost guiltily, muttering, “yule ball.”
she left dinner with a rather colourful bruise on her arm that day.
-
winter would come to an end at some point, even if it was already early spring.
however, you’d really think it would just last forever at this point - what with the way the mist drizzled through the highlands and clouded the windows. the sun was hidden for good - at least until tomorrow, or maybe even the day after that. it was only around six, but it was pitch black outside and we had nothing to do.
the common rooms were warm and contrasted pleasantly to the biting cold outside. the fireplace never failed in its purpose, and the students were cosily gathered around in comfortable clothing and blankets, clutching hot drinks, snacks and playing silly games of truth or dare.
only about twenty or so people were sat here, but it felt cozy and enjoyable nonetheless.
“pansy, truth or dare.” I almost rolled my eyes at the sound of the damned game.
“truth.”
a friend of mine rolled her eyes, expressing that she didn’t expect anything exciting to come out of this.
“uh...met your soulmate yet?” the guy who asked was called miles or something, a generically average guy.
to my surprise, she nodded and grinned sheepishly. i didn’t bother changing my blank expression since, to be honest, i didn’t really care about who it was - but someone finding their soulmate is always a little exciting.
miles spoke up again, “really? care to share?”
the next part really surprised me, even drawing me to sit up and cock my eyebrow in questioning. she’d leant further into the boy who sat next to him, smiling up blissfully and saying, “isn’t it obvious, bletchley?”
the victim of her clutches looked at her - equally as confused as i was. his eyebrows furrowed and those blue eyes flashed to mine, quickly scanning my reaction. i watched lazily, not giving him satisfaction of letting him see me riled up or annoyed, which was clearly just what he wanted.
seeing my lack of response, he smirked subtly and nodded slowly. “yeah, i guess she’s telling the truth.”
a few cheers echoed throughout the room, playful and mostly just consisting of immature comments. my exhale came out sharper as i tried to hide an uncontainable scoff, rolling my eyes and looking away. theo caught my eye from beside me, nodding his head towards malfoy in a silent ask of ‘what’s he going on about?’. i shrugged and leant closer to quietly say, “no idea what he’s playing at, but when do we ever?”
he breathed out a laugh in response, nodding to show that he agreed.
“oi oi, looks like we got another couple here too!”
whoever yelled it had drawn attention to me and theo, the both of us like confused deers in headlights. i laughed almost awkwardly and shook my hand no.
albeit, we didn’t really help our case - not with the way we were sat so close, whispering into eachother’s ear, and with his arm draped across the back of the lounge where my shoulders would be if i leant back.
“don’t be a fool, warrington. you know we’re just friends.” theo said cooly.
warrington grinned cheekily, raising his eyebrows suggestively but not saying anything more. i saw draco poke his tongue into the inside of his cheek, stifling much more visible annoyance. what right did he have to act possessive right now, especially over me of all people?
foolish, foolish boy.
“go’on pansy, pick someone.”
“alright - blaise, truth or dare?”
blaise answered almost immediately, “dare.”
pansy looked to malfoy beside her for help. i watched with a slightly tighter chest as he leant closer to murmur something into her ear, earning a smile of approval from her. “blaise, i dare you to kiss the person you’re most likely to date out of all of us here.”
he raised an eyebrow but pushed himself off the couch anyway, instantly sauntering over to the girl next to me. whether or not they wanted to go so public, it’d certainly be common news after this.
he offered a hand which she took with an excited grin, then he pulled daphne up rapidly and collided his lips to hers. louder whoops and cheers rang out, laughing as the couple smiled into the kiss.
god, i couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit envious. my eyes wondered back to the idiot sat adjacent to my right, cursing the universe once more for gifting me with such an ass for a soulmate.
when their moment was over, blaise left with a wink as his girlfriend sat down with flushed cheeks and swollen lips. she hid her face into my arm and giggled giddily, linking arms with me as i laughed at her ridiculously.
blaise spoke this time, “alright - malfoy, truth or dare mate.”
he rubbed his chin with a ring-adorned hand, casually replying, “dare.”
the cunning look that flashed in blaise’s eye sent a small shiver down my spine, already knowing that i subconsciously wouldn’t like where this was going.
“make-out with your soulmate, right in front of everyone.”
again, draco’s eyes diverted to me. a wordless conversation processed.
don’t do it.
‘what, don’t kiss you...or pansy?’
me. her. both. i don’t know.
obviously i wasn’t jealous (that would be ridiculous), but no one wants to see their soulmate makeout with someone who they falsely claimed as their own so publicly. the thought made an almost animalistic sense of possessiveness wash over me - why? i wasn’t sure. not in the slightest.
okay, so i did know.
curse my soul, curse the stars, curse the universe.
and curse pansy too. especially her. the way she grabbed draco’s cheeks and brought him onto her made my heart convulse and a sickly feeling spread in my stomach. it felt so, so wrong to see that, like we’d just defied the fates and their premeditated plans.
my soul must’ve sensed something went wrong and off track because for a split, horrifying second, all the colour in the world turned off. it flickered back almost as quickly as it left, but it was enough to make me miss it dearly. draco must’ve felt something too, because that was when he had the decency to finally push pansy off of him.
fuck the game. everytime we played, something went badly.
his eyes immediately searched for my face and i saw his expression fall as he studied whatever i showed on my face - anger, perhaps grief, maybe even nothing at all. i stood up and left, out the common rooms and straight for god knows where. the astronomy tower, maybe. or perhaps the library sounded nice.
i didn’t even need to think that far ahead before footsteps caught up to me, bouncing off the corridor’s walls in an echo. the shoes sounded expensive, so i could make a lucky guess as to who it was.
the prat gripped my wrist and spun me around, where i instantly shoved him off and glared at him. “who do you think you are? you think you have the right to dare touch me, even after that?”
his jaw locked tightly as he looked away in frustration, wracking his brain for something to say. why was he even bothering? this would only be another argument, stemming from the hatred that i swear was just born in the both of us, specially reserved for one another. nothing would change, so why did he even need to try and redeem himself? and also, why did i want him to try?
“she pulled me onto her, you literally saw it.”
i scoffed and crossed my arms, “brilliant, my mistake. you’re excused for pretending she’s your soulmate, going along with the whole thing, and, not to mention, embarrassing me like that.”
his eyes widened as he leant forward angrily. “embarrassed you? in front of who? no one even knows what we are to each other, so fucking relax.”
i felt blood rush to my face as my anger multiplied. “god, you’re just so ignorant, aren’t you? so as long as this is all swept under the rug, who gives a fuck how i’m feeling, right?”
he laughed sarcastically, “and when do i ever care about how you feel?”
i glared at him. “you can pretend, malfoy, but we both remember you comforting me on the astronomy tower that day. oh, and what was that about you carrying me all the way inside from when i fainted before? and, correct me if i’m wrong, but aren’t you the one who proposed we give in to lust and set aside our differences, all those months ago? and, didn’t i then turn you down?”
he narrowed his eyes, tightening his jaw again as the muscle clenched harshly. “you’re such a brat, aren’t you? such a spoilt, entitled little brat. god, i suppose i should’ve just left you to die of hypothermia on the field, in the pouring rain? or maybe just walk away after i saw you feeling sorry for yourself atop the tower?”
i rolled my eyes and stepped closer, pressing a finger to his chest and digging in harshly. “i’d be much happier if you just left me alone, forever. i’d rather deal with a colourless life for the rest of eternity than have to deal with your shit for a second longer.”
he gripped my wrist and came down to my face, almost to the point of our noses touching. i could see every bit of rage in his eyes, feel it in his tightening hold on me. “shut the fuck up, before you say something you’ll regret.”
i scoffed obnoxiously into his face, “regret? baby, i mean it all.” i don’t think i did, actually. but regardless of my untruthful words, i still wanted to hurt him.
his grip started to turn too tight - unbearably so - and i don’t think he even noticed it. “malfoy, you’re hurting me. let go.”
he looked briefly down and then back up, throwing my hand down as if it disgusted him. “i don’t care what the ‘universe’ says, there’s clearly been a mistake here.”
i smiled in faux sweetness, “shame, because no one else will ever be able to put up with you. hell, even i can’t, and i’m supposed to be your exact other half. tell me, draco, what are you gonna do about that?”
he stepped towards me once more so that we really were as close as we could get without physically touching, and spat practical venom as he deeply growled, “i don’t know, Y/L/N, just learn to tame you? teach you how to behave, maybe how to show some fucking respect?”
i tilted my head in a dare, meanwhile feeling my heart start to accelerate - as if it had felt that the ‘right’ person currently stood so close - “and just how do you plan on doing that?”
his eyes flashed perilously with promises of pain. with a dropped tone in his naturally deep voice, he slowly uttered “i’ll say it one last time; shut your mouth. you don’t even want to know what i’m thinking right now.”
did i? adrenaline had kicked in by now, sensing the release of oestrogen in my body, coursing along my blood. i knew he wanted to hurt me - just as much as i did him - but just how far was he wanting to take it? just how far did i want to push him before eventually letting fate play out the way it’s intended, and give him what we both so wanted?
no, i must have been blinded. completely blinded. it was like pushing against myself, because i’d been wired to feel like this. i could remember this exact feeling in the closet all those months ago, loving the high that i got off of being so near him, but hating the boy that caused it.
i let my head drop to the ground in defeat. “i’m so tired of his, draco. i’m literally at war with myself here.”
he remained silent for a while before using his fingers to grip my chin with a little more force than what was classed as gentle, and tilted me up to look at him. he flickered from one eye to the other, giving me time to anticipate his next actions but also to admire the sharpness in his eyes. not just the colour (that i was so grateful to be able to see), but also the pure, raw emotion that hid behind all those shades of blue.
his voice was softer but still borderline angry when he finally spoke, “then pick a side.”
with a harsh and blunt release of my chin, he departed and went back to the common rooms - though i doubt it was a return to the group of people, and instead into his private dorms.
i was left alone in the hallway, wondering what my next course of actions should even be.
whatever had happened last night was certainly all a blur. i might’ve been under the minorest of minor influence, but i was sober enough to remember every detail. the only confusing part - why? although the six and a half minutes in the closet were suspenseful, hot, lustful, the person it was with was vile, evil, the worst.
despite the confusion from my last night’s occurrences, at least i was sure of one thing in the current moment; weasley certainly knew how to embarrass himself.
the class watched as he awkwardly danced with professor mcgonagall, stiff and grimacing the whole time. the gramophone played some old classical music - some rather pleasant melody if only the scene before us wasn’t so abhorrent.
more training, though this was for the yule ball in a few months time, part of the triwizard tournament tradition. when it had been announced, it took one wordless glance between me and theo and it was sealed - of course we’d attend as eachother’s dates.
the history between me and theo was one that our mothers gushed over often; we met at a garden party hosted by my family, and our mums were old bestfriends from their time at hogwarts. the two of us weren’t shy at the age of six, and we spent the entire day eating hors d’oeuvres, running around the gardens and hedge maze, mocking the prestigious attitude of the guests and then begging for one more hour together when the party ended.
it was thanks to us that our mothers both reconciled their friendship, and since then we’d see eachother at least once a week. when we were six months into a strong friendship and saw his parents having a typical ‘married couple’ argument, we both agreed that relationships seemed much too difficult and that eventually, he’d end up being my husband, me as his wife (because, at six, who cared about the whole process of dating, anyway). that way, we’d be able to always be eachother’s dates to fancy events, and not have to bother with all the other stuff.
we pinky promised to get married when we were adults - pretty light stuff for kids, right? despite that being nothing but an inside joke as of now, we still always went together for family balls, dances etc. it was tradition.
“now, can everyone please get a partner. ready? great, we now commence the dance! everyone, one two three, one two three...”
the students piled onto the empty classroom floor, waltzing while talking amongst themselves. i laughed as theo extended a hand, bowing in the most gentlemanly fashion. “may i have this dance, my lady?” i faked a curtsy and lowered myself before taking his hand, “you may, good sir.”
our dancing was easy and familiar, something we had done together in many, many events before this yule ball. i glanced around at the other pupils, subtly smiling as most of them awkwardly stepped on their partner’s toes and stumbled over themselves. it wasn’t until a few moments later that i saw a very bored, very blank faced blonde, dancing perfectly with a clearly swooning girl. i turned back to theo and bowed my head lowly to hide my laugh. he chuckled at me, “what?”
i nudged my head in the direction of malfoy and smirked, “looks like he’s having a good time.”
theo glanced behind my shoulder and smirked back, leaning in closer to speak quietly, “parkinson’s in love with him - looks like the feeling isn’t mutual?”
i sighed just before he dipped me in synchronisation with everyone else, then replied when i came back up, “unrequited love - is there anything more tragic?” my voice teasingly theatrical. no reply came from my dancing partner.
the routines went on for about ten more minutes before it finally ended, and everyone left for the end of lesson to lunch.
as we exited the room, i heard everyone excitedly chatting about the dance - what they’d be wearing, who’d they’d be going with, that sort of thing.
a ravenclaw, lily moon, nudged me, “are you coming to hogsmeade this weekend? a few of us girls are going to try on gowns at ‘merideth’s’.”
i shook my head, “it’s okay, thanks lily. i’ll just ask my mother to send one over.” she nodded and paced away to the great hall as daphne came by my side and linked arms with me.
“blaise zabini. what do you think?”
i raised an eyebrow, “malfoy’s friend? he’s quite tolerable. gentlemanly. seems well brought up, although maybe a bit of a playboy. why do you ask?”
she nodded in agreement, “he asked me to the ball. i said i’ll think on it - you know, just to keep him on his toes. if he ends up asking another girl then i’ll know i was right in not saying yes straight away,”
i hummed in thought, “and if he waits patiently?”
she grinned, “then i’ll just have to date him, won’t i?”
- TIME SKIP
i was right in asking my mother to send a gown. she knew her daughter and the art of dresses well, choosing one of upmost beauty and class. the dress was a sheen of light mesh and tulle, playfully drifting down my figure in shades of light, little translucent flowers delicately flittered across.
i felt like a princess, especially when my group of friends that waited for me in the common room were left open mouthed and gasping compliments. theo had ever so perfectly matched his tie to the shades of my dress, so we looked like a rather handsome couple as opposed to just bestfriends with a silly promise.
the girls looked beautiful and we all exchanged compliments along the lines of ‘that dress!’ ‘your hair was done by the gods, i swear’ ‘i’m incredibly envious of your date right now...’, the last one emitting a giggle from me as theo playfully glared at daphne.
with me on theo’s arm, just like how we’d done it so many times before, we descended the stairs of the great hall and found it masked to be a literal winter wonderland. the walls were enchanted to be frosted over in faux ice, and pillars were added to create a grander appearance. the roof had been bewitched to appear endless, and to have spitting drifts of delicate snow that greeted the tops of our hair.
for the second time in a couple of months, theo offered his hand and bent at the waist, to which i genuinely curtsied and accepted it. he led me in formal order to the dance floor and we waltzed, just enjoying the atmosphere while talking about everything and nothing - since it was basically just any other ball for us.
classical music whispered all throughout the room, singing beautifully and clear. a long shelf of hor d’oeuvres and refreshments were set to the side, as well as tables and chairs that were only half full of conversing students and teachers. my eyes continued glanced around behind theo’s shoulder, although i wasn’t exactly sure what i was looking for.
it wasn’t until my eyes met the form of a certain prat that the curiosity had been scratched, and i realised with horror that i was subconsciously searching for him.
i purposely sketched a small frown to my face, reminding myself that he was ‘awful’ and ‘the worst’ because, dressed in that alluring, neat two piece of white, his suit was screaming the opposite.
actually, it was probably just because i hadn’t seen him dressed this smartly before.
malfoy was dancing with the same girl as he was that day in class, barely smiling but still looking carefree. for some reason, i hated that. how could he be so free of troubles when he should be busy hating me? had he forgotten his greatest enemy, the one who he hollered insults to down the hallways and across the table at meals?
“something caught your eye, love?” i snapped back to the familiar face of my bestfriend and softened my expression, dropping the scowl.
“just looking at all the different gowns here.”
he offered a sad smile. “it must be hard for you, seeing in black and white still.”
i nodded, not thinking much into his words.
daphne had come with blaise after all, the two of them dancing happily under the mock snow. they gazed lovestruck to eachother, both looking ready to melt as they held one another with gentle endearment. i laughed quietly and directed theo’s attention to the pair. “they’ll definitely end up together, won’t they?” i said rhetorically. despite me not expecting a response, he went against my question anyway - “what? blaise? no way, he’s on a new girl every week.”
i shrugged nonchalantly, “you never know. a girl like daphne can pin anyone down”
-
i needed a break from the dancing, and so i currently stood against the sidelines with a glass of some nonalcoholic beverage in my hands, politely watching the night progress.
the event was still young, still had lots to happen, but i was close to bored at this point. theo was off somewhere, and daphne was still dancing with her lover boy, so i was left to my own devices.
it wasn’t until the song switched to a faster one that i noticed him for the second time tonight, an image that now flashed with disruptions as lots of couples spun and danced past to the speed of the song.
draco malfoy stood on the opposite side of the hall, drink held in one hand and the other tucked in his trouser pocket. he had his rings on clear show around the glass, sparkling under the impossibly bright candlelights, demanding my attention.
he’d also noticed me by now, the two of us making eye contact with an intense expression behind our gazes. i watched as he raked his eyes slowly up and down, studying my dress and probably something else, too. my fingers tightened around my drink as he looked me dead in the eyes, cocked an eyebrow and smirked.
the dancers were still passing in front of his form consistently, quick movements that were controlled by the tempo of the string quartet - and yet i still caught the teasing, wordless suggestions from his mischievous eyes. the double bass echoed alongside a harmonising cello, playing perfectly behind the singing violins.
my emotions stopped at my throat, desperate for me to go over and perhaps insult him, but i forced the words to simmer down and controlled my features into a sweet smile. i made sure an image of unbothered nonchalantness was painted on, before putting my drink down on a table and parting ways with that insufferable oaf and his stare.
outside, the weather was nothing like the enchanted ceiling of the great hall had led us to believe. the rain was coming down purposefully, washing down against a still night. there was no calm snow, but also no harsh winds. just the dark sky, the little stars sewn inside it, and the greeting wash of light downpour.
the astronomy tower showcased it well, and also provided shelter from the bustling sounds of the very much alive ball that was further inside. it was utterly calm up here - absolutely no annoying blondes to spike my irritation or provoke my anger.
i listened to the mellow rolling of thunder in the background, watched as the lightning followed a few moments after. the storm was close, but nothing to be worried about as of yet. the sounds of nature were disturbed by footsteps tapping along wet stone, slowly approaching me from behind. hopefully it wasn’t a stranger coming to make conversation, and hopefully it wasn’t anybody i had to be friendly to. i was in no mood to converse. the relaxing environment i was in had made me so incredibly calm that the thought of exchanging typical pleasantries made me feel exhausted already.
a figure leant against the stone railings next to me, looking off into the distance just as i was. i turned to look at the person before letting out a relieved sigh. “theo, it’s just you.”
he smiled, not turning to look at me.
THEO’S POV
i knew you’d be here.
whether you were sick of the dancing, the music, the talking or even of seeing my friend whom you said you hated so much, i knew you’d be up here.
“you got bored?” you asked. i turned my head this time, looking at your side profile as you noticeably relaxed in the presence of ‘just’ me.
i hummed in reply, watching as your head tilted up in beckoning for the rain to fall against your skin. somehow, i found myself almost jealous that the rain got to touch you. a growl of thunder rolled over the sky, followed a few brief seconds later by a bolt of lightning. it reflected off the Y/E/C in your eyes, dancing in the same way we had done a few half hours ago.
“your dress is pretty, your mother did a great job of choosing it. i suspect that’s your favourite colour?” you turned to nod nonchalantly and smile, then gazed back to the sky.
silly girl. so, so clueless.
“i liked daphne’s dress, too. the pink goes well with blaise’s navy, i think.” i felt you stiffen slightly, listening carefully as i carried on, “and did you notice most girls matched to the colour of their house? god, the amount of red dresses i saw today. gryffindors and their pride,”
your face turned towards me now, clearly confused and making sure you were hearing me right. i still continued, “a shame that it’s so dark. the grass down there is usually so bright, especially after a fresh downpour. oh, and those trees over there, see them? they always blossom really pretty flowers in the summer, but i guess you’ve never seen them before - in colour, i mean.”
i looked at you, not bothering to muster up a chuckle at your mouth that was slightly parted in shock. rather, i trained my eyes away from dangerous territory and avoided that area. instead, i offered a small smile, seeing if you’d just managed to connect the pieces for once in your life.
“who?” your voice was soft and curious, utterly oblivious.
i sighed and opened my mouth to call you absentminded and ignorant, but closed it and instead dug into the inside pockets of my blazer.
NORMAL POV
he pulled out the same small glass vial from the potions class so many months ago, uncorking it easily and wafting it under his nose. he closed his eyes and inhaled, then opened them and asked, “you know what i smell?”
i furrowed my eyebrows, letting him reply with, “something citrusy - lemon, maybe. expensive perfume. vanilla, the natural kind and not the sickly sweet kind. the smallest hint of floral scents, if you really try hard enough. this,” he shook the bottle, “smells just like a certain friend i have.”
i stayed quiet, not dare confirming that i knew who those aromas belonged to.
he held it out just under my nose, inviting me with a nod to smell it. i obliged and wondered aloud, “mint. cologne. something fruity - definitely apples. subtle gel. rain. what is this, theo?”
he offered another weak smile and corked it shut, carelessly tossing it over the side and off the tower. “that was amortentia.”
my heart felt like it dropped to the pit of my stomach.
i found myself arguing with the reality of the situation. perhaps this was just some temporary infatuation that he was about to admit to, something we could laugh about in a couple days time?
that’s when he started speaking, clearly on a roll with his confession and not bothering to hide anything anymore. “i thought i was special as a kid, wondering why i never remembered seeing anything as monochrome. my memory isn’t the best, actually, so i don’t really remember before we became friends anyway. my mother said i must’ve just been some sort of exception, but i didn’t realise until a couple of short years ago that...i’d already met my soulmate by the age of six.”
he chuckled and stared into my eyes, “i left that garden party with everything in full colour, only to find out that you still saw in black and white. i ruled you out straight away, because my naive brain couldn’t comprehend that there was even a possibility of one’s soulmate not even being...being the right one. actually no, you are the right one. i’m sure of it. it’s you that’s the problem, Y/N. why, fucking why do you not see fully yet? we’ve made physical contact so many times, and yet you have the…you think you have the right to still see in black and white?”
my chest stung with every word he spoke, dreading to speak whatever words i could even conjure up with for a reply. i felt pure heartbreak at his words, wanting nothing more than to take his sorrow and heal it. soothe it. i wanted to love him back, oh god why couldn’t it had just been theo.
another sting came, but of anger this time. platinum hair, smirks, the scent of apples and cologne. my hatred pushed deeper, frustration taking over in the form of tears pooling in my eyes. there must’ve been a glitch somewhere amongst the stars. it was the only explanation.
the fates could not be so cruel.
i couldn’t form words, especially as theo took a hand and cupped my cheek. he let a few moments pass, then he asked without an ounce of hope, “see any colours yet?”
a few short moments passed until i replied, my words barely a whisper against the hiss of wind and rain. I wished they would carry the confession away, so far that we could pretend it never existed. “i do, actually. only, it happened a few months ago.”
he snapped his hands away as if my skin was suddenly aflame. i whispered, looking down because i couldn’t bare to face him, “that quidditch practise. with draco.”
i heard only silence, and then an accepting exhale. the only sight i saw were his shoes stepping closer, pressing a light kiss to the top of my head, before he parted, down the stairs and out the tower.
i bit my lip, ignoring the blurred eyes, and turned back to the open landscape, welcoming the storm that grew closer.
“harsh, Y/L/N.”
i whirled around, recognising that voice anywhere. malfoy stood with his hands in his pockets, a blank expression on his face again. he sauntered over and replaced the spot where theo stood minutes before.
“go away.” i said.
he scoffed, leaning against the railings on his elbows and facing me. “you just temporarily lost your bestfriend, don’t push your soulmate away too.” his voice held layers of halfhearted seriousness, but also some sarcasm.
at the word soulmate, i glared harshly and stepped closer in an attempt to intimidate him. to be honest, i couldn’t care less if he was intimidated or not - as long as i was close enough for him to see the hatred behind my eyes, i was content.
“i haven’t lost him at all, and fuck your ‘temporarily’ bullshit too. if you’ve come here to annoy me, you couldn’t have had worse timing. please, just go away.” my voice almost cracked at the last sentence, a build up of so many emotions in my chest and throat.
he remained silent, something that i was almost grateful for.
at that moment, i hated the universe even more than the boy who stood next to me. i hated it, because even now i could feel my soul yearning for him. i could sense the connection deep inside me somewhere, wanting to be comforted and held by the person to my side. i’d never felt this demand within my body for anyone else, and i knew i wouldn’t be possible to - the evidence was in the society around me.
“i hate you.” i uttered, because it’s all i could bring myself to say.
he only replied, “i know.”
DRACO’S POV
your eyes were thick with moisture. in a different circumstance, i would’ve gladly taunted you relentlessly for crying, but i understood your frustration well.
i hated you too.
i hated when you stood up to my comments, when you boasted about your quidditch triumphs, when you matched my arrogance, when you fucking laughed.
i hated our souls being two halves of the same whole, because i could feel the desperate pull inside me everytime you were within visible proximity.
actually, i felt a need to be with you even when you weren’t nearby. the want to tease you, to provoke your scowls and glares and snide replies. i despised you for leaving me all those months ago, embarrassed and almost hopeful in the closet, alone. i despised you for showing up tonight, looking undeniably beautiful as usual. i couldn’t ever see you as less than, because the very stars forced me to see you like this.
perfect.
Y/N Y/L/N, i fucking hate you.
that’s why i’m currently grabbing you by the shoulders, pulling you into me and wrapping my hands around your body, tangling my hands into your dampened hair. that’s why when i felt you sharply inhale in surprise, then melt into my body with a reluctant relief, i felt the hard, mean exterior that was ‘draco malfoy’ dissolve slightly, possible to be abraded only by you.
a monochrome palette paints the world for everyone who hasn’t found their soulmate through physical touch. although, after the hellish quidditch captain fails at an attempt of discipline, the grass turns green, and his eyes…they turn blue.
see here for part two, part three, part four
i’m SUCH a big fat sucker for soulmate au’s and just throwing the enemies to lovers makes it for me. i hope you LOVE LOVE LOVE this series because i had so much fun writing it!
malfoy would be the absolute bane of my existence, what with all his snide remarks and harsh, sarcastic criticisms. he truly thought he was so much better than everyone else, and the way he swaggered through school really drove his narcissistic, elitist personality further. that obnoxious white hair, those infuriating and painfully greyscale eyes, that fucking smirk that was always plastered on his ghostly pale face - i hated it all. and if this prick swore at me once more, i might just act violently on my hatred for him.
however, it seemed that today was clearly just not my day.
quidditch was one of my most favourite things about hogwarts, and i was actually one of the most favoured players in slytherin - so why on earth was i embarrassing myself in front of my teammates right now? another missed goal, another wince from me and my friends, another yell from draco. marcus had left last year and left draco in position of captain, but i still couldn’t decide which one demanded less gruelling training.
a decent portion of my friends made the team, one of them being a mutual between me and the devil incarnate - theodore nott. he played keeper, someone who went hand in hand with the opponent’s chasers. theo was typically attractive and caught quite a decent number of girls’ eyes (although, maybe not as many as his pale headed friend), but for some reason or other, he always ended up turning down their proposals at getting to know eachother. why? i had no idea.
currently, cassius warrington flew behind me, acting as the enemy chaser on my tail while i clutched the quaffle, watching the goalpost become bigger and bigger in size. i could feel his eyes on me, daring me to make a mistake. my palms threatened to slip off the broom with the clammy moisture from the repetitive drills, adrenaline and, honestly, a bit of embarrassment, but i kept myself steady. a couple more yards, a slowed travel on my broom, aim, throw and -
blocked.
i cursed as crabbe looked around foolishly for what had hit the back of his broom, reprimanding myself mentally for letting the quaffle hit a dumb, absentminded and barely moving obstacle. as if i needed a reminder of just how badly that went, a shout echoed down from just above me, “what the fuck is up with you, Y/L/N?”
i drove casually back to ground level, holding my broom to lean against it and then looking back up to the playing space. malfoy raced down to me with a disbelieving, angry face before jumping and landing off his firebolt with a thud and storming towards me.
“what do you think you’re playing at? you’re a chaser, not a fucking child! do you know who blocked you? do you?” i crossed my arms and looked at him in boredom, knowing it would annoy him further despite also knowing i deserved to be lectured.
he looked me up and down in dramatic disgust before slowly and quietly drawling, “fucking crabbe. you just got blocked by a flying bloody baboon. if you want to keep your position on the team - because let me tell you, there are absolute queues to take your spot - then sort yourself out, Y/L/N.”
he went to walk away to demand the continuation of practise before i called back, “god, it’s just an off day, alright? don’t you dare talk about replacing me, you know i’m one of the best that this team has.”
i was subtly smug, mimicking the same arrogance that he seemed to love to wear all the time. the corner of my mouth turned up as he paused and slowly turned back around, wishing me dead with his eyes alone.
“an off day? an off day?! have your bloody ‘off days’ when you’re not practising on my pitch, because i won’t tolerate anymore of this ridiculous prancing about in the air anymore. you were a sore excuse for a chaser today, let alone the best in the team,” he paced nearer as my smirk was washed away and replaced with a glare, then he grabbed my shoulders to really let his yells sink in.
while he shouted something along the lines of ‘you fucking hear me?’, i closed my eyes and felt the world tumble around in a harsh and heavy motion, controlled by malfoy’s frustration. when it suddenly stopped, i opened my eyes - to see a whole new world.
the boy in front of me was wide eyed, staring at me in mere disbelief, shock and perhaps some sort of pained expression. and yet i couldn’t care less about his shock or pain, couldn’t stop to take pleasure in it - especially when i’m sure my own pain was amplified by ten.
the pitch was green. as was our house colour. that bird was almost purple. crabbe’s face was red. the sky was blue. his eyes were...blue.
i ignored everything that happened prior and grabbed draco again, looking him seriously and frantically - “quick! what colour are my eyes?”
his mouth didn’t open, but his still-widened eyes switched slowly from each of mine as he stayed quiet. i think he must’ve gone to say something - maybe answer my desperate question - but instead he came to some sort of inner realisation, slowly started to plaster another harshly placed scowl and glared at me, shoving my hands off and spitting, “i don’t care about you or your eyes. just...” he trailed off, looking me up and down again.
this was when i, too, came to the realisation that draco malfoy, the boy i would pray to be wiped off the face of the earth, was supposedly the other half to my soul.
my ‘heart’s desire’. the twin flame. the universe’s gift to me.
my expression turned expressively dismal. i…this…draco? was my soulmate?
my jaw itched to drop. i had to fight every urge to drop to the ground and tear at the grass. to rip every shred of the world apart until nothing was left and the conceit of soulmates ceased.
instead, i took a deep breath. this just…isn’t true. it can’t be true. i won’t let it be true. i took ahold of my broom that had fallen onto the green grass, and looked draco back in his eyes. he looked just as confused, miserable and regretful as i felt.
i mustered up all the steadiness i could for my voice. “thanks for the colour and all, but let’s just forget this happened. i’m fine on the whole ‘soulmates’ thing - simply not interested, sorry.”
his scowl turned deeper, then into anger as he scoffed at my now retreating back, “i was just about to say the same thing! yeah, walk away, i’ll have you working drills for the entire afternoon and evening tomorrow! filthy little - ” his words cut off as i drowned them out, sending a small, apologetic smile to my teammates who were just stood around, waiting to be dismissed and clearly used to our bickering.
thankfully, they seemed none the wiser to our worlds that were now in full colour, or the fact that i was studying everything in hidden awe because i could see - really, truly see - the colours in their eyes, the shades of their hair in the late afternoon sun, the colours on our training uniform and the palette of the entire universe around me.
theo noticed me leaving and abruptly said farewell to graham montague, jogging lightly to catch up to me. his broom was held in one hand, his other came around to platonically drape over my shoulder. “we’re leaving so soon?”
i sent him a side smile, “you can stay, if you please. although, i doubt you want to spend another second with that sorry excuse for a human being that you call a friend.”
he chuckled and shook his head downwards, “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N. i don’t insult your friends, try not to bash mine so.”
i almost paused our walking to look at him but settled for just a sound that came between a laugh and a scoff (since i wanted to put as much distance between me and the prat as possible, so stopping would only prolong his presence being near me).
“theo, the rest of your friends are fine. tolerable. likeable, even. that one,” i nudged my head in the direction of somewhere behind us, “is satan’s worst fear. he’s needlessly rude, stupidly arrogant, dumb and egotistical, fucking annoying and don’t even get me started on that hair - what is up with that? i’ll bet he bleaches it. no one has hair that obnoxiously white.” albeit, now that i had my full vision, his hair was more of a blonde than just white.
during my rambling, i came to realise just how cruel my situation was. for some reason, my soul had chosen draco to be it’s long lost partner. someone who i could never love, and would easily hate. i would rather drive him six feet into the ground with wooden stakes than involve myself with him in any ways more than just a quidditch captain, and even then he was next to unbearable.
with a stab of pain and the feeling of dread creeping up my spine, i realised that my previous words were true - the universe is so, so cruel to me.
-
“i’m just saying th-”
i cut theo off by shushing him with a finger to his lips, silently sending him a warning look and mouthing the word ‘focus’.
potions was never my strong suit, yet somehow my bestfriend managed to completely ace it everytime - and apparently he thought that, due to his success, it meant i had no need for concentration either. i turned my attention back to sprinkling the pearl dust into the dark liquid, watching as the silvery powder mixed with another element and dissolved into nothing.
snape was reading out the instructions as we went, droning with a monotonous voice and sounding just as bored as we were. the whole class was in pairs of our own choice, so of course me and theo clicked together. my fellow girl friends were just behind us, chatting quietly amongst themselves and not minding the usual favouritism i had towards theo.
i felt rather than saw him roll his eyes at me before he blatantly ignored my request and continued to talk, “no, but i’m just saying if you tried, i know you two would get on well together. do you know how much easier it would be if - ”
“yeah yeah, if only your two bestfriends were friends too. i know, theo love. i’ve heard you say this a million times before, but it’s never going to happen. you know i - ”
“yeah yeah, that you love me. yeah i do, I’ve heard you say this a million times before.” he grinned obnoxiously at my pointed look. “and i also know that you love me just so much that you’ll try your best to at least be civil from now on. he’s been purposely working us all to the bone in training - just to get back at you.”
i internally cringed at how true his words were as i remembered the ever present ache in my joints and limbs, feeling almost guilty for my teammates that were dragged into this from my doing. actually, no - this wasn’t my doing. it was malfoy’s choice to be a begrudged prat, let him do whatever he wanted.
“what did you even say that day that’s made him so angry, anyway?”
i more noticeably cringed this time and shook my head in defiance to reply. he chuckled and took the stirrer off of me for the cauldron, continuing where i left off.
as i was free of duty, i glanced to the right of the classroom where malfoy and his handsome friend worked together (blaise, i think it was).
he was adding something to the pot but looked up as he noticed my eyes on him, and stared back blankly. he wasn’t meant to catch me staring - i wasn’t even meant to be staring in the first place; i briefly panicked and resorted to casually rolling my eyes, turning back around to my friend.
theo must’ve caught the interaction, because he let out a short laugh and flicked my forehead with his finger. “you’re being needlessly rude, Y/N.”
“and you’re being lazy. what has it been, thirty seconds? and you’ve already stopped working? get to it, nott!”
“it’s finished, you buffoon!” my eyes snapped to the cauldron to see an almost pretty purple liquid, glinting under the candle light that swirled with the stirring motions.
i smiled sarcastically and crossed my arms, “about time.”
he rolled his eyes while the most teasing of smiles lingered on his lips, before reaching into his robes and pulling out a small bottle. he dipped it into the mixture and then popped the wooden cork on top, putting it away and tucking it into his uniform. i raised an eyebrow, to which he said, “saving my masterpiece. never know when you might need it, after all.”
i nodded slowly, “what potion did we actually just make?”
he tapped the side of his nose with his finger, indicating that i probably wouldn’t find out for a while. i lost interest in whatever the potion might’ve been, and instead focused back onto the colours.
i mentally gushed over the vibrancy of the deep lavender, putting the colour to memory just incase this was some sort of cruel hallucination. that would’ve been absolutely awful, but it would’ve also meant that the one who’d triggered them wouldn’t be the same who was tied to me via soul...so perhaps not so tragic.
just as i was about to say something to theo, i felt a barge from behind me as someone sauntered past, making me whip my head around. i let out an exasperated exhale, “of course it’s you. god, you’re such a child aren’t you?”
the culprit turned his head just enough to smirk in satisfaction before walking away, leaving theo with a tight lipped smile and me with a scowl for the rest of class.
-
despite now seeing everything in full colour, i didn’t let myself enjoy the scenery that hogwarts had to offer longer than the briefest of glances, because today was a big day. i was ready to beat malfoy’s ass in a game.
well, not necessarily beat him since he’s our team’s seeker but...I was ready to show him just how prized his chaser was.
the audience was a mix of split cheers for either team, but the house of greens always managed to be the loudest. ravenclaw were doing their best and, to be fair, they were quite strong players, but my teammates weren’t afraid of toeing (or utterly annihilating) lines just to get another win.
i was doing good - brilliant, even; every goal had been perfectly thrown in, i had scored a total of fifty points so far, and malfoy was looking pretty irritated that he wouldn’t have something to yell at me for.
just after montague saved me from a particularly harsh bludger sent my way, i dived back to fetch the quaffle off of a ravenclaw boy, chasing after him side by side as he sent me side eye glares. i smiled sweetly, then subtly knocked the side of him to send him off balance. he tilted and his arm came out to stable himself, releasing the quaffle and leaving it free for me to swoop in and retrieve it from thin air.
a short race to the opposite side of the pitch to where our goalposts were had attracted a group of opposing chasers on my tail. i was a considerable distance away still, but i was sure it was possible. all the exhausting training would hopefully pay off despite the harsh intentions behind it, because all i needed was arm strength and confidence.
the slytherin audience was quiet in anticipation just for one more goal, yet screams and hollers were coming from the house of blues to ‘get that quaffle!’ ‘don’t let her score!’ and ‘knock her off the damn broom!’ a few made my eyebrows cock up - the ravenclaws could be brutal if they tried.
i looked behind me to see almost half the team speeding straight for me, quickly gaining momentum as one girl reached right for the tail of my broom. i decided that this was near enough. i extended my arm and put all my frustration from the past few weeks from extensive training and snide remarks into it, watching as it flew - and landed exactly where i wanted it.
a couple moments later, and the announcer says “malfoy catches the snitch, slytherin wins with 240 points!”
-
“you did brilliant, Y/N!” theo said, chuckling as i threw my arms around him, laughing in excitement and leftover adrenaline. i ignored the way we were both slightly panting from being out of breath, and how his hair was slightly damp from the rain and sweat, and instead focused on the rush of the sweet win.
“yeah. looks like my training worked, hmm?” i turned to see draco swaggering over, wiping his brow and catching his breath.
i rolled my eyes and met him halfway, putting my index finger to his chest accusingly, “just admit that i’m a great player, malfoy.”
he glared but couldn’t help the smallest of smiles slip through, “over my dead body, Y/L/N.” he gripped my wrist of my hand that was still harshly poking at him and grinned in a mean expression -“honestly? i’ve seen better.”
his smile turned satisfied as he saw my glare, but i didn’t give him any more of a reaction and walked back to theo and my friends, tugging their arms to follow. daphne leaned in and whispered, “god, the sexual tension between you two.”
i masked a disgusted expression and held up my hand, “never, daphne.”
-
slytherin was hosting a party in the common rooms tonight - in light of the victory and being one game closer to the holders of the quidditch cup, and so me and my roommates had dressed to look hot.
after the first rounds of celebration had my head tingling with intoxicating liquors, someone called for a game of truth or dare - typical. most of the party gathered in a massive, warm circle; the lot of us a reflection of high class with the air of rich, pureblooded kids.
the only difference in tonight’s party was that i could see what different colours everyone was sporting, and hiding it proved to be a challenge. it made me wonder just who else here could also see the same as me. i sat on one of the dark emerald sofas that made part of the circle, sitting with my group of girls while theo, the prat and their friends sat adjacent on another chaise lounge. everything was a drabble of black and rich greens - a beautiful and prideful palette.
someone’s leftover bottle span in the centre, twirling and eventually landing on daphne. the boy who started called, “greengrass, truth or dare?”
she grinned and pretended to think before replying, “dare, of course.”
he smirked, satisfied. “i dare you...to expose someone in this group, but leave it anonymous.”
a quiet chorus of ooo’s sounded out as she looked down, trying to think of an answer. as her head snapped back up, her eyes flickered to the left of the group before she spoke, “someone here has met their soulmate, but it’s a one sided thing.”
“shit, really?” he asked. she nodded in response. damn, poor guy. not the juiciest of exposures, but it was something.
soon, the bottle was disregarded and people just started randomly choosing a victim. “Y/N, truth or dare?”
i rested my hands across my knee as i crossed my legs, smirking. “dare, daph.”
she smirked back in return, “i dare you to spend seven minutes in heaven with...malfoy.” horror spread through me at her words, and she bit her bottom lip to stop the obnoxious smile spreading as the rest of the circle cheered and laughed, the majority of them knowing just how far our hatred for eachother ran.
i instantly opened my mouth to deject before terrance higgs yelled, “reject it and you’ve gotta take a shot of this!”
i looked to see what ‘this’ was, only to see the liquid of veritaserum, a substance that would force me to spill the truth. i couldn’t risk the news of the whole soulmate thing to get out, so i stood with a huff and looked to malfoy, sitting at our left.
he looked bored, entirely unbothered. i could’ve scoffed at his facade.
after he also got up, he held out his hand to which i stared at blankly. i rolled my eyes and walked on my own towards the closet. i felt him following behind with the clicking of his shoes, heard someone else say the timer would start as soon as the door shut, and then we were suddenly secluded in darkness.
judging by the sound of glass bottles clinking and rowdy voices, the game carried on outside.
we stood opposite eachother in the dim lighting. the close proximity made it impossible to look anywhere but him and his intense, blue gaze. only one single, pitiful candle flickered light onto the walls around us.
“this is ridiculous,” i mumbled.
he hummed deeply in agreement, and yet i found that he stepped a step forward despite it.
i suddenly notified the strong scent of expensive cologne along with subtle mint, masculine and enticing. with every moment passing, i kept reminding myself of the mutual distaste we had for eachother, because with a scent like that i could’ve damned all the hatred rooted between us.
if only he wasn’t an arrogant ass. if only the stars hadn’t fated us together, and the magnetic pull within our very souls towards one another wasn’t incredibly strong right now. if only he wasn’t draco.
“agreed.” he breathed, whispering lowly.
i studied his eyes individually, not letting myself appreciate the stark cerulean and instead mentally repeating his surname - the firm reminder of who he was. his hands shook my fragile concentration, appearing along my waist and almost, almost pulling me against him. “malfoy, what are you doing?”
his fingers were like a ghost against my body as he ducked ever so slowly to besides my ear, and chuckled. “‘malfoy’, always ‘malfoy’. what about ‘draco’?”
his hands trailed up and down with slow intent, smoothing the fabric of my dress. every time he spoke, memories of him reappeared.
him yelling at me, forcing me to repeat harsh drills, barging past me in the hallways, and all those damn sarcastic comments - they all flashed through my mind like a retelling of a story. regardless, his hands kept flickering against the images, distorting my sense of thought. his scent was denying every bicker we’d ever had, his breath next to my ear crumbling my resolve and promising my soul what it wanted. no, wait. i didn’t want anything from him, much less this.
how long had it been since we’d been stuck in here?
he continued talking. “don’t you think...” he pressed his lips ever so scarcely to the shell of my ear, before barely dragging his teeth along it, “we could get along for just an hour? perhaps they’ve forgotten about us out there.” my torso was flush against his, courtesy of his prying hands. my knees were almost shaking, my neck turned cool from his teasing breath. my hands went to his chest, warning him to stay back but not really, since i couldn’t bring myself to apply enough pressure.
i wouldn’t let myself enjoy this, nor would i even toy with the idea of pulling him closer, but i also couldn’t find it within myself to push him back. i tried speaking, but only a weakened sound came out. i internally cringed at it and forced my voice to work, “you know they haven’t. and i haven’t forgotten either, malfoy. don’t you remember who i am?”
he moved lower, a ghost against the top of my neck. he dragged his teeth down so, so slowly, trailing along my skin in the most painful of speeds possible. “are you that repulsed by me, Y/L/N?” he suddenly gripped my wrists in one hand and pushed them above my head, emitting a hardly audible gasp from me. “or...is it the opposite?”
his words were achingly teasing, and if it were anyone else i would’ve damned the location and kissed them to the heavens. the words malfoy and hatred and soulmates were blurred into a thin line, but his cocky tone that spoke surety of my compliance shook that line and built my resolve right back up.
this prat thought he had me exactly where he wanted, and so far i’d let myself go along with it. my eyes had closed somewhere along the way, but i opened them and let them droop sultrily, a gaze of faux lust. he pulled back and smirked with confidence, releasing my wrist with one hand to cup my cheek, caressing my skin with his thumb.
i turned us around quickly, hitting his back onto the wall that i was just pressed against, and smiled. i trailed my hands down his chest and back up again, leaning right up against his lips but never making contact. his eyes were hooded now, clearly still under the veil of lust and an impression that i was about to cave.
my voice was kept quiet, and sensual, “no, you were right at the start.”
he didn’t fully register my words straight away, but then his eyebrow raised and he went to talk. i cut him off as my hand raised, smoothing a finger down the side of his face as if i was savouring him, remembering the feel of his skin, “i despise you, malfoy. if only you weren’t...you. then, i’d let you do whatever you desired. a shame, is it not?”
i pulled away completely, then wiped any previous expression away to replace it with a glare. i didn’t get to see anything except for his eyes widening in pure surprise, before i opened the door and walked out.
i cursed the remaining thirty seconds shown on the timer.
in which a pair who hates each other are also the ones who, unbeknownst to themselves, secretly need each other
one of my favourite works i’ve done i can’t lie
the note had read, ‘what the fuck kind of answer was that?’
you turned your head to the blonde headed prick that sent the paper bird, scowling and narrowing your eyes as he looked back in exaggerated disgust. you mouthed ‘grow up’ before turning back around, hearing a scoff in return.
yes, so you’d gotten the answer to snape’s question completely wrong, but he’d caught you completely off guard and half asleep. i mean, what else were you supposed to do in potions - pay attention?
you took a piece of parchment, now much more awake than you were five minutes ago. written on the paper were now the words ‘go fuck yourself, tryhard.’
your lips curled into a smirk as you charmed it in a snake, a mockery of the slytherin boy, and sent it off to slither across the floor and towards his seat. despite the insulting words sprawled across, draco’s lips mimicked your smirk as he read the contents. he lifted his eyes to yours before folding the paper, bringing it to his lips and ripping it in half with his teeth.
you furrowed your eyebrows in disgust, horrified at the sight. once split in two pieces, he took his wand and muttered an unheard spell from where you sat, and then the parchment set alight. a tiny eruption of flame gobbled up your offensive jab as he crossed his arms in smugness at his own retaliation.
-
he’d been attacked by a hippogriff, it seemed. the news had spread after a care of magical creatures lesson had ended and all the students couldn’t get enough of “the battle of draco and the ‘bloody chicken’.”
just because this was a magical taunting opportunity, you found yourself skipping to the hospital wing with a slight spring in your step, a marker in hand and a newfound sense of excitement.
once you reached the infirmary, you found that draco was indeed an inpatient there. the only patient currently sprawled across a bed, crying out to pansy parkinson about his pain and clutching a sling that was wrapped around his arm.
you don’t think he realised that he was grabbing his forearm in pain, as opposed to where the hippogriff had supposedly attacked - on his bicep area.
it took a few moments for him to notice you leant against the metal pole of the bed, and once your eyes met you raised your eyebrows in greeting and smirked. he immediately cleared this throat and leant up, swatting pansy’s soothing arms away. her worried gushes turned to silence and confusion as her eyes followed his awkwardly darting ones, coming to eventually meet your face with distain.
you merely glanced up and down her badly postured body in a look of judgement before draco uttered, “you can go now, pansy.”
a small smirk tugged at the ends of your lips but you refrained from showing gratitude for her dismissal. you would’ve done it if he hadn’t, anyway. her mouth opened to protest but draco sent a glare in farewell, causing her to leave her seat and send you a final dirty look before blessing you two with her absence.
“what do you want, Y/N?”
you ignored the question, “you look like you’re in so much pain, you poor baby.”
his eyes narrowed, “come here to annoy me, have you?”
you held up that pen, flashing it like a prize. a small grin sketched on your face as you said, “to sign a cast, actually. i’ll be the first, if your girlfriend hasn’t done it already.”
he scoffed, “don’t call her that, she’s not. and anyway, you’re not signing my cast. you’ll write something pathetic, and i won’t be able to get it off.”
“no way, you understand the science of a pen?” your sarcasm earned you an eye roll, but you continued, “i just want to sign my name, honest!”
he eyed you suspiciously, debating between telling you where to go or just allowing it…maybe this was your redemption arc? and so the boy held out his arm and briefly shook it in go ahead, looking away in pretend boredom while you replaced pansy’s previous seat.
the soft scratch of the pen, although unfelt through the thick cast, kind of soothed him. it wasn’t until he heard you sigh in content and click the lid back on that he took his eyes from the window and glanced down at your signature - what was supposed to be your signature.
instead, three massive, black inked words stared back at him in taunt. “BIG FAT TWAT.”
he looked back up with enraged eyes to see you grin cheekily, blow a kiss and bolt out the chair. draco yelled profanities at your retreating figure and the middle finger you rudely held up behind your back, earning him a dirty look and a harsh scolding from madam pomfrey.
-
as the years progressed, small pranks and somewhat innocent remarks down the hallway had turned into harsher words being thrown about and more permanent tricks on one another - said tricks may or may not have resulted in infirmary and snape’s office visits, for remedies and also potions to resolve the unpleasantries of your mutual hatred.
silly turned into downright mean, and it seemed the fine line between love and hate had been crossed, far, far down into the latter side.
-
“would you believe them two?”
your friend sighed sighed, shrugging and going back to her meal. the two slytherin girls eyed you briefly as you glared down the hall at that blonde headed boy who was narrowly staring right back, sick of seeing the same ritual every dining hour.
“i know. it’s like they’re a married couple.”
the other nodded, breathing out a laugh. “she pays more attention to him than us at this point - and they supposedly hate eachother?”
she laughed, “right? i say it’s just sexual tension, you know.”
“i agree. i say - shag it out, and then we can have our friend back.”
at this, your mind snapped into focus and registered the words. “what the fuck did you just say?”
your friend giggled, “the way you two stare at eachother - god, you can’t get enough!”
“i’m sending him death glares because - well, look! look at the way he’s sat like he owns the entire table - no, the entire hall! look how he’s muttering something to blaise while looking directly at me, god it’s so obvious he’s talking about me.”
your friends decided against pointing out how you were also doing exactly that, instead just letting you continue your rant, “it’s like he’s obsessed, honestly. i’ll bet he wants to make out with me - you’re probably right, you know.”
your hand then came down to hit the table to emphasise your point as you finished, “and, god, and look at that fucking hair!”
draco must’ve heard the last exclamation, because his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes widened. you either didn’t notice or didn’t care, and continued with your point, “he definitely bleaches it. i mean, come on! him and his hair look deprived of oxygen and vitamin d,”
while your friends laughed at your accusations and went back to a conversation, trying to bring your focus along with it, draco’s exasperated claims could barely be heard as he said to blaise something along the lines of “…just look at the way she’s sitting!” and “fuck me, she thinks she owns the entire table. no, the entire hall!”
-
it was sixth year that the arguments and wars died down, having flickered to almost only dirty looks exchanged and harsh barges in the corridors.
it wasn’t any of your business, and you told yourself you didn’t care at all, yet you couldn’t help but take notice of how he noticeably looked bad.
and not just bad as in ‘fake hair, ugly face, weird posture’ bad, but bad as in…distant. withdrawn. sometimes when you glanced around the room and, weirdly enough, always landed to look at him, you’d notice this faraway look painted across his face along with a haunted imagery behind his eyes.
you didn’t say anything, because what would you even say? you didn’t know how to talk to draco malfoy, you only knew how to insult him. and so, the issue went unsolved. an itch just tearing at a small part of your skin.
-
the night was late, and you’d just suffered a detention for being caught out past hours. of course, to punish you for that, a professor had kept you even later, forcing you to write ‘i must follow school rules and not wonder out past curfew’ until your wrist felt like giving out.
you entered the slytherin common rooms, slightly happier at the cosy scent of rich colognes and perfumes, burning firewood and parchment paper. your tired eyes started to affect your usually quick pace, giving you a chance to lazily study the room as you directed yourself towards the girls’ dormitories. it was then that you noticed a figure on the lounge, drinking from a bottle that must’ve been smuggled into the building.
he was staring at the fire, as still as anything. you couldn’t see his face as his back was to you - he could’ve been asleep for all you knew. maybe even passed out and intoxicated, perhaps.
your eyes forgot about their exhaustion as they widened in recognition, and your concentration went to making your steps unheard as you crept along your pathway. just as you thought you’d made it, you heard his voice lowly say, “no need for that. i know it’s you, Y/N.”
you didn’t move from position, but stood up straighter and fumbled with your fingers before muttering, “how?”
“i always know when it’s you.”
you went to walk towards him, coming infront of him before slowly placing yourself on the single person sofa adjacent. draco’s eyes followed when you were in his sight, not even bothering to move his head.
it remained silent for a bit as you regretted the decision to come sit with him. why had you done that? all you wanted to do was walk away and sleep. all you knew to do was clear your throat and insult him, maybe joke about the prominent circles under his eyes or his hair that wasn’t styled neatly for once. instead, you trod on unfamiliar territory and blurted quietly, “why are you up so late?”
his head fell to the back of the sofa, eyes still on you as he watched from a different angle, a more lazy one. “thinking. you?”
it felt more natural to built your guard up and say, “do you care?”
draco only barely shrugged and shook his bottle, finishing the last bit before tilting his head back again. your bottom lip came inbetween your teeth as your eyes drifted away from the orange flickering lights on his face, courtesy of the crackling fire, almost feeling bad for not being able to offer more supportive company.
“thinking…about what?”
he didn’t move much, only shut his eyes, and replied, “do you care?”
fair enough, perhaps you deserved that.
the past insults hurled back at you in the moment, a mental reminder to you of everything he’d ever said in hopes of drawing a reaction - such as the time when he’d spiked your goblet with polyjuice potion and turned you into a somewhat mix of ferret and human - a comeback for your relentless teasing in forth year when mad eye moody turned him into one.
this was the boy you hated, and the boy you didn’t care about. you mustn’t care about. it was this thought that brought you to your legs, abruptly standing up and causing his eyes to open and his head to lift up to you. he looked bored, but somewhere in that expression it seemed like he wanted you to stay.
but he’d never voice that out loud, and you’d never stay without a reason to. maybe it was the incredibly subtle sadness that coated his down fallen eyes while you walked away that drew you to pause for a tiny second, breathing out into the fragile air, “get to sleep soon. it’s late, draco.”
-
christmas break was over, and you were all on the train to return to hogwarts.
your seat was opposite where draco sat with pansy and blaise, a group of slytherins surrounding you. it wasn’t necessarily strange to have your eyes draw over to him every so often, but it was strange to wonder and somewhat care about why he still looked so…depressed.
his mouth was more of a scowl than it had been before, and draco seemed more angry than sad. you couldn’t help but let your eyes linger a little longer than appropriate at his masculine appearance, the way he’d grown into his features and boasted more chiselled facial structure now.
maybe he thought the same of your advanced maturity, because when the train stopped and the students all emptied out, he called to his friends, “you two go ahead. i need to check something.”
for some reason, you stayed. and when his eyes met yours for the first time since before christmas - and remained there in a short and intense stare - you knew he’d meant for you to, too.
once the train was empty enough, he stood and slid shut the door. his briefcase remained forgotten on the table, and you remained sat down out of anticipation and…a few other emotions.
you stared at his long, ring adorned fingers as his hands slowly pulled down the windows, shutting out the rest of the world and enclosing you two in a large enough train compartment. just large enough for many things.
once he turned, you saw another different emotion in his eyes. it was raw, much more exposed than the hidden sadness had been before. it was intense, much fuller than the anger had seemed. draco malfoy looked at you with a concoction of hatred, and need.
maybe you mirrored his expression, maybe you looked as dazed as you felt, but you shot up from your seat and stood opposite him, unsure what to do and afraid of pushing him away.
that was actually impossible; there might not have been anything that could’ve made him leave in that moment. one thing and one thing only was on his mind - you.
it happened so fast, but luckily your bodies wanted it more than your minds knew. it seemed your reflexes were just desperate enough to know what to do as he took two strides towards you, used one large hand to grab your hair, and pulled your lips straight to his.
it was certainly a new sensation, but you didn’t want to stop it. unfamiliar - definitely - but also something that felt so incredibly, righteously wrong.
his hands were possessive and rough, quick and needy as one travelled down your body, your neck, your cheeks, the other tangling in your hair. your own seemed to have a mind of independence, just feeling him wherever they wanted. his hair felt soft, you noticed. his neck was tempting, so much so that you had to draw your lips away from his and connect them to it.
you left marks down the once blank skin, and in return he did the same. you took your hand and lightly brushed your fingers across the bruises, using your nails to gently trail marks back across them afterwards. he took his attention on nibbling your ear and whispering unfamiliar words there as you did so, and only for a few long moments did you pull apart to admire each other for once.
he looked beautiful (you hated to admit), the way his lips were swollen and his neck spoke suggestions of being involved with you. he must’ve thought the same, because he roughly took a claiming hand to the back of your head and brought you back onto him.
it was all quick - much too quick for your liking. you had to stop just after his blazer had been removed because the train whistle sounded in warning, threatening to leave with two students still aboard.
at some point during the suspenseful moments of having your lips so close and so desperate to reconnect, he muttered deeply something that was almost not comprehendible against your skin, and you couldn’t make understanding of it until a few hours later when you relived the moment over and over again.
he had whispered the words, “only you.”
and you understood. draco was going through something and was entirely alone, and in some strange way you’d been the only offer of comfort he had. the realisation had struck you hours later, and it brought your legs jumping out of bed and straight to a door that you somehow knew was his.
draco answered the door that night, eyes widening once he noticed who it was.
the only thing you could offer was a shrug and a small smile, “‘only me’?”
he glanced behind him at the dark room before widening the door and letting you in. you guessed he had some sort of privileges where he could have his own dorm, but that didn’t matter to you in the moment. he lingered at the door for a few moments as you tried calming your pulse that raised in your ears. “are you okay?”
you didn’t think he’d reply because of how long it took, but at some point into the dark and silence he eventually muttered, “do you care?”
at the repetition of the question, you rolled your eyes. that must’ve served as enough of an answer for draco because, in the dim lighting, you saw his hand flick the lock and simultaneously heard the sound of it clicking securely in place. then, he came over to infront of you.
you’d walked just deep enough into his room that all he needed to do was push you by the shoulders to have you led on the mattress, gazing up at eyes that seemed conflicted at his own movements. once he removed his shirt over his head and came to hover above you, your hand cupped his cheek for the first time ever.
it took a few swallows and moments of building up courage, but eventually you whispered, “i care.”
his lips tugged into a weak smile, “thanks, i guess.”
his faint edge of sarcasm had you pushing out a laugh, breathily replying, “can’t stand you.”
quidditch is a scary sport, but a protective boyfriend is even scarier.
“alright, you imbeciles, listen up!”
draco’s voice bellowed to his players, a captain’s order of silence as he went through the strategies of his game. of course they were already full of clever tactics to help them win, so he rounded off the entire thing with a slightly quieter demand, “and if anyone is knocked off their broom, make sure it’s the opposite team, not us.”
that was the ritual for every game. however - today was different. only one thing had changed since the last game for draco, and it was his love life. his lovely girlfriend - a pure, kind hufflepuff, one he had the biggest soft spot for and protected like she was golden. in a way, Y/N was also like a little bubble of protection for draco because he felt safe around her, as if nothing could hurt him. it was why he’d made it his sole duty to keep her from harm’s way - something that would be quite difficult when his parents had forced him into this particular life.
however, on a smaller scale of quidditch, he could easily do it. and that was why he added something to his speech as they readied to fly out onto the pitch.
usually, he would end with a ‘just don’t get caught’, or ‘a little blood was okay’ and it would suffice, but today he had a new requirement. “right, idiots, one final thing.”
they looked blankly at him, ready for the preparation talk.
it never came.
instead, a warning took its place. “we’re playing against the hufflepuffs, obviously. i don’t care what happens to the other players, but you’ve got two orders today; win the game, and don’t you fucking dare touch Y/L/N.”
his eyes narrowed at the team’s beaters, “you two - you’ll be off the team if that bludger goes anywhere near her.” he looked at them all, “got it?”
a chorus of yes and okay’s sounded out, and it contented draco enough to nod and then call to get ready to fly out.
-
the grass was entirely sodden from the showers from above, and the smell of wet grass was something the players could still smell from all the way above in mid air. there, they couldn’t shelter from the aggressive rain, and so all the slytherin and hufflepuff players were soaking in mere minutes.
the audience was riled up and so ready for the win. usually, anyone would assume slytherin would be the victors because they did whatever it took, and didn’t get caught. jabs, elbows, grabs, kicks, all so subtle that only a trained eye could see them. however, when draco and his girlfriend were against eachother and hogwarts had seen themselves how defensive he was over her, who knew which team would prevail?
had he sacrificed his usual tactics to keep her safe, or did competition come before his lover’s physical well-being?
-
the boy watched from above, searching for the little golden snitch while trying to push his eyes away from Y/N. it was near impossible to not watch her as she played, and it wasn’t just the thundering rain distracting him but also the ruthless bludgers flying around - much too close to her for his liking.
eventually, the thoughts all blurred into one as he spotted a flash of the trophy he needed to win. draco dropped from his hover, diving down to get to it incase he lost sight of it - or worse, incase the hufflepuff seeker saw it too.
the wind lashed against his face and the rain felt like pins of cold piercing his face, but the sooner he finished the game, the sooner slytherin won. and the sooner he could get Y/N out of this weather, and preferably all to himself for a few spare hours.
his hand outstretched, so, so close to the snitch, when he heard a shout from below. his head whipped around instantly, slowing the chase to see what had happened. it was a hufflepuff chaser who’d shouted, yelling something in a hysteric manner.
“Y/N!”
the chaser’s eyes met Draco’s in midair, and exclaimed something with a panicked expression. once he registered what he’d said, his stomach plummeted.
“she fell!”
draco immediately froze and hovered mid air, the snitch long forgotten about. his heart thumped and pounded in his ears as his eyes scanned the floor, looking for a girl’s falling figure - not just any girl, his girl. his mind hummed in a mix of screaming, panicking thoughts, and draco hated it.
fear.
the stench of it was in the air, taking the form of damp grass and cold air.
his worries only grew stronger when he couldn’t find her anywhere near the ground, when shouts then started echoing around him. he ignored them, thinking they were in correlation to whatever had happened to Y/N, all up until his eyes met hers.
she was still on her broom, upright and uninjured, yelling at him through the heavy rain and becoming an unclear image because of it. she had stopped playing, but it wasn’t because of an accident. but, what was she saying? what was going on?
“he’s lying! play, draco!”
once he registered what had happened, he spun back into action with a brief snarl. the shouts had been his team players and they weren’t warnings, they were pissed. just as he set off in find of the snitch again, one last shout echoed through the stadium.
loud, clear, and from the announcer. “humberstone catches the snitch, hufflepuff win!”
-
he stomped onto the ground, thudding all his rage onto the descent. he ignored his teammates ready to console him and offer ‘it’s alright’s and whatever else they had to say. draco made his way all the way through the hufflepuffs to where Y/N stood beside a few of the players, one of them being his target.
zacharias smith.
hufflepuffs were kind, loyal - not scheming and deceitful.
“smith, what the fuck do you think you’re playing at?”
at the sound of his voice and the sight of the anger in his eyes, he turned and cringed inside. draco noticed Y/N make a move towards him, no doubt to comfort him over the unjust way of losing (despite all the times slytherin had cheated themselves), but he ignored her.
smith’s hands held up in truce. “sorry, mate. a games a game.”
draco narrowed his eyes and threw his expensive broom onto the ground, “a game means you play with strategy! you don’t lie about somebody falling off their broom, you filthy little mudblood.”
perhaps he was halfblood, perhaps he was pureblood. it didn’t matter, because draco only cared about insulting him, and provoking the same fear that he had felt minutes before.
“it’s not that big of a deal - we already won, malfoy.”
“you think i’m bothered about you winning?”
zacharias grinned, a cunning twinkle in his eye that did not belong to a hufflepuff. he sauntered over to Y/N a few steps away, provoking a sound that sounded too close to a growl from the back of draco’s throat.
his arm went around her shoulders, pulling her close in a move that’s anything but friendly. draco’s jaw ticked.
“move. away.”
his teeth were gritted, but zacharias’s flashed in a smile. he shook Y/N playfully and taunted draco further. “ohh, i get it. you’re bothered about Y/N!”
the fake revelation made his finger poke Y/N’s arm, her hand coming around to cover it in offence. “draco’s little girlfriend.” he cooed while draco gritted his jaws together.
the boy raised his hand to push his housemate around more, before the slytherin stormed over. his eyes were dangerously narrowed with a promise of pain, and within moments he had smith raised by the collar of his sports uniform. the next words were seethed with venomous poison, “touch her again, and i’ll kill you.”
his voice was low, and it was enough to send a shiver down zacharias’s and Y/N’s spine. both for quite difference reasons.
smith’s hands raised again, his breathing frantic and his eyes wide. “alright, alright. just playing, pal. calm down, draco.”
draco’s grip tightened, shaking him in a way to show he wasn’t joking, or on a first name basis. “i’m not your fucking pal, and don’t you dare say my name.” draco brought his face closer, a leering smirk taking over the angry expression at the hufflepuff’s lack of confidence now. the rain dripped down his features, one droplet specifically about to fall on his nose. draco relished in the fear of his eyes, satisfied that he was getting what he deserved. “and if i hear you even say her name, you’ll lose your vocal chords. got it, ‘puff?”
zacharias glanced around at the audience they’d gathered, awkward and now almost blushing at the attention. he subtly gulped and nodded slowly, enough to make draco drop him on the ground. the boy fell and scrambled to gain his balance again, trying to desperately pick up the pieces of his dignity on the wet grass.
draco left, a loser in the game but feeling like a champion. his arm casually draped over Y/N’s shoulders, painting over where the other fool had touched.
she glanced up at him with amused eyes. “you didn’t have to do that, draco.”
he grinned, “felt pretty good though.”
her eyes rolled. draco smirked down at his lover, leaving one final glance over his shoulder to see zacharias surrounded by his fellow players, grumbling something and slowly walking to shelter from rain.
in which jealousy may be unnecessary, but you just couldn’t help it
i think i accidentally made myself the oc because :)
oh, you just loved your boyfriend so much. as a whole, draco malfoy was a dream, but there were certain specifics that you loved the most.
to start, there were his hands. they were the perfect toys to fiddle with during boring classes, in the dining hall or whenever you’d both be back home (whichever one of yours you’d happen to be at) and he’d be writing with his dominant hand, so you’d claim the other free one. the jewellery adorned on his long, slender fingers were illegally attractive, so much so that you never knew whether to hide it from public eye or flaunt your boyfriend to the world.
then there was his hair, of course. incredibly soft, so enticing and always begging your fingers to run through every silky strand. it gave him individuality, but also served as a powerful telltale sign to his bloodline.
you could go on, but why bore us with what everyone already knows? you weren’t shy to initiate public affection, and he was more than happy to put a possessive arm around you or a claiming stand beside you. insults, glares, threats, whatever he felt like they deserved - all were thrown at people who stared just a little too long at you, most of the time being when you were hardly even aware of it. no matter how much you reassured eachother, perhaps neither of you would ever outgrow the possessive... mildly jealous trait.
it started on a tuesday morning. you came in through the common room door, down in the dungeons where the cold was sealed off by an enchanted room covered in green.
a sigh, and then a smile - because you saw a familiar head of hair illuminated by the burning fireplace before him. draco’s back was to you, relaxed into the lounge in a lazy manner with his legs parted and pretty hands rested on top. you didn’t miss the glinting of jewellery, and took steps straight to him with the feeling of the day’s stress evaporating the closer you got.
the evening had come, and at last you could just enjoy the comfortable, quality time with your boyfriend.
you came up behind the couch and leaned over, running a hand through his satin hair and smiling down at him. draco’s face turned from firm to a happy, knowing smile. it was you, and he always knew just from the gentle feeling of your fingertips. your lips parted into a smile as you buried your face into the crook between his jawline and shoulder, leaving behind a moments kiss and simultaneously happening to catch his expensive cologne that made you positively crazy.
your chin rested on his shoulder and airily said, “hey, darling.”
he knew how hard school was on you recently, and so he brought a hand to the back of your head and ran it slowly through your hair, starting from the nape of your neck to the almost ends. his soft lips littered against your cheek while your eyes fluttered closed and he greeted back, “evening, love. rough day?”
you nodded against his shoulder and breathed heavily, inhaling his familiar scent, exhaling the pressure of the day.
an unfamiliar girl’s voice popped the little bubble you’d made, her voice like a criminal’s knives as she suddenly said, “oh! you two are so cute!”
your eyes snapped open and your head raised from draco’s provided rest, coming to meet a stranger of a slytherin sat on the adjacent couch. how had you not noticed her?
her posture was confident and she wore an expression of amusement, but also envy that only a fellow girl could spot. if you weren’t so surprised at her being there, you might’ve smirked because, well, who wouldn’t love to be in your position?
draco gestured halfheartedly towards her, and you didn’t fail to see how the girl’s eyes followed his hands - your boyfriend’s hands. “this is pansy. pansy, my girlfriend, Y/N.”
the title never failed to bring flutters to your stomach and chest - especially when he loved to flaunt it around everyone - and presently was no exception. you grinned and nodded, pulling up from the metaphorical warmth of him but still resting a hand on his shoulder. you extended a hand for her to take, which she got up off of her seat to do so. draco watched and smirked, face tilted down at his lap to hide it. he knew what you were doing - a show of power (or was it of mere confidence?) to make the other get up and come over to greet you. you kept that possessive streak by placing your delicate little fingers onto his shoulder covered with a dark blazer, the smile behind your eyes not friendly but boasting in pride.
pride of him. and that thought made him do what he did next. “she’s new, just moved from some all girls school in america.”
your eyebrow raised. wow, so they had time to chat, did they?
draco spotted the movement, as he surely knew all your body’s actions by now, just like an open book, and knew you were already pushed over the edge of some soft of envy. it made him delighted in a strange way.
“my full name’s pansy parkinson. lovely to meet you, Y/N.”
you smiled again, “Y/N Y/L/N. likewise, parkinson.”
her eyes glinted. evidently she recognised your name - an extremely wealthy family like yours wasn’t one that went unknown by the wizarding world.
“draco was just telling me about his classes. potions sounds especially good, i can’t wait to start properly tomorrow!”
as she spoke, you rounded the lounge and came to sit besides draco, your legs crossing over one another as the fireplace’s heat tinged against your skin, even though it was covered by the uniform’s thigh high socks. draco very much favoured these on you, and would tell you that everytime you spent some...quality time together. sometimes, he’d even insist they stay on. it was this that made you smirk (but conceal it with a faux cough behind your hand) as your boyfriend brought a strong, firm hand and brought it against your thigh. his placement was intentional, and very purposely moved; low, so that it looked nothing short of plain casual , but high enough that it felt torturous to you. professionally done, because he somehow knew everything there was to know about touching you, and then how to do it in the presence of other people without them being none the wiser.
still, pansy’s eyes just barely flickered to his hand. they danced back to you with the orange firelight glinting in her brown eyes.
that night, draco was mean enough to tease you about your jealousy, and laugh about your exaggerated annoyance to his politeness - “it’s not like you don’t know how to be rude!” you’d said.
he’d simply chuckled, and made up for it by being kind enough to take your mind off of it for the rest of the night.
-
fourth period was a drag to come, and you trudged into the classroom of potions ready to sit by your usual seat next to draco and do nothing except play with his fingers and try on his rings, something he loved you doing because something about it made you look more like his.
your anticipation was wiped away by the sight of a giggling girl in your place. parkinson sat there, arm on draco’s bicep as she failed to stifle a laugh at whatever he was boasting about - something he’d never pass up an opportunity to do, and had nothing to do with flirtatious intentions but everything to do with his apparent ignorance to how sought after he was by the girls.
this stranger included.
you didn’t have the patience for this. in fact, you wanted nothing more than to curse her into oblivion for even looking in his direction, but you were better than that. with that being the only thought that satisfied the green sensation boiling away in your chest, you slumped into the first seat you saw vacant, one in front and diagonal to draco’s usual desk.
your arms crossed and a frown settled it’s way onto your features, a deep enough expression that - “you’ll get wrinkles if you keep frowning like that.”
your head snapped to the side, acknowledging the person you’d seated yourself next to for the first time. blaise zabini. draco’s friend, wasn’t he? a shrug, and then, “i have bigger issues than that right now.”
the tanned boy leant sidewards onto his fist, cocking his body at an angle to see you almost straight on. his posture was lazy and, somehow, you could instantly tell that he was wealthy. perhaps not as much as the malfoys, but was anyone? “tell me more, Y/L/N.”
a backwards nod had him craning his head slightly above his hand, peering over and eyes flickering to his friend and the female accompanist. a look of recognition dawned on his face and he mouthed an ‘oh’, before grinning and resting onto his hand again. “it’s only malfoy, you know he’s probably just pratting on about his money or something.”
this would’ve made you laugh (anything to tease your lover boy) but draco wasn’t here, and so it felt almost wrong. plus, he was busying himself with someone who wasn’t you, so jokes were above your mood right now.
judging by his intake of breath, blaise wanted to say something else, but the scraping of a chair stopped him before he could. a firm hand clapped onto blaise’s shoulder, covered in all too familiar rings. one particularly large one - a piece of fine silver that happened to be amongst your favourites - had a carefully crafted pattern hand sketched into it, a story of serpents and blossoms surrounding a pretty malfoy crest.
his deep voice sent a cool wash over you, mimicking an icy glaze of shivers, but you masked it over because you were still irritated with him. when draco uttered, “switch seats, blaise,” you merely crossed your legs neatly, and even when he took a seat and sat sideways so he was facing you directly did you only subtly scoff and then turn your head to the side.
his hands were clasped as his elbows rested on his knees, and you wouldn’t have seen his tongue that poked the inside of his cheek as he studied your bratty behaviour, but you certainly felt his next movement. his gentle but somehow rough skin met your chin and his fingers pulled your head back to meet his eyes. as soon as you were in position, his hand left your face and he leant backwards against the wall, a thumb rested against his bottom lip.
“what’s the matter, love?” the nickname wasn’t as endearing as it usually was, but you didn’t focus too much on that. you shrugged nonchalantly (like you weren’t thinking of all the curses that would inflict warnings to not go near draco again, but then wouldn’t get you in to too much trouble) and replied, “you seemed occupied, is all. thought i’d let blaise keep me company instead.”
he studied you again for a second, eyes intense like they always were. then, he stated, “you’re jealous.”
your eyes narrowed, but you wiped that away before sucking your teeth and saying, “i’m not the one who forced someone out of their seat, malfoy.”
he chuckled, shaking his head at the use of his last name - something you only used if he demanded it during later nights, or if you were angry at him. of course, currently it was the latter.
“she was asking about my father’s business. hardly worthy to get jealous over, love.” you opened your mouth to defend yourself once more, and he interrupted, “my mistake - not jealous...how’s ‘irritated’ for you?”
your blank stare was met with another brief chuckle before he raised his eyebrows in amusement, “seriously, she’s like that with everyone. look,”
reluctantly obliging, you glanced back to see pansy now chatting up a storm with blaise. he looked engrossed with whatever she was saying, but surely it was down to her (admittedly) pretty face, and not the words dribbling out of her mouth.
your face must’ve been a portrait of sheepish humour, because draco laughed under his breath.
then leaned in closer.
his lips casually pressed into the side of your hair with a heavy, loving kiss, and no one else would have any idea that he whispered against your ear, “you’ll see tonight just how insignificant she is, trust me.”
the glimmer of suggestion behind the words were steaming hot, and the bubbling green soon left your chest and replaced itself with something red instead. draco sat properly in his chair, and just in time too, since snape decided only now to saunter into the class with his billowing robes behind him. your boyfriend’s pretty hand rested on your thigh, playing with the end of your long thigh high sock by fumbling with the band or lightly snapping it against your skin, so soft that it felt like almost a kiss of fabric.
once he stopped his movements and just relaxed his hand to focus on writing notes with the other, you decided to resort to your favourite passing activity - playing with his fingers. both of your hands twiddled and softly touched his hand, and he only flashed a genuine smile sideways at you before going back to his work.
you could only think one thing as you breathed in his lavish, comforting scent and took in his gentle body warmth beside you: yeah, he’s worth getting jealous over.
ps. NEVER FORGIVE A CHEATER ever never you deserve way better. do as i say not as i write <3
months had passed, and Y/N had watched the seasons go by with it. after a week of sleeping in an empty house - their house - she’d called up an old friend and stayed with her, because the silence was just too much. it was filled with loud, racing thoughts, and they kept her up at night.
“time will heal.” her friend daphne had said.
what went unspoken afterwards was the fact that Y/N didn’t want healing, she didn’t even necessarily need it. she wanted draco, but it just wouldn’t do to go back to him yet. she would not cave into her lonesomeness, and she would wait until he was truly sorry, until draco had learnt the definition of regret.
of course, she didn’t wish for him to suffer, but the pain that he’d put her through had long since turned to numbness, and all she could think about was him.
it was unfair. everything was unfair. Y/N spent so many hours wondering just why he couldn’t have come to her. all those nights she spent just keeping him silent company - wasn’t that enough opportunity to talk to her?
in a different timeline, she felt that this could’ve all been avoided, so Y/N blamed draco at first. she couldn’t ever hate him, not really, but she hated him for cheating. melody flint was the only name she could think about apart from ‘draco malfoy’, so she then shifted the blame onto the former. married men, rich men, powerful men, influential men; was that melody flint’s type? is that why she went for her husband? or…no, Y/N daren’t consider the possibility that draco was the one to initiate it all.
after a short time of blame filled days and a world hating attitude, Y/N’s mind then flooded with other thoughts. was it her? was she not enough for draco? was this the part of the marriage where someone started to get bored? she’d read about it in books, even scoffed at the stereotypical-ness of it to draco a few times, but she never thought it might actually happen.
for her, it was scary. how could two people love eachother enough to get married, share a life together, and then sabotage it?
now, her days were becoming more and more full of dread, because an approaching future meant the choice soon had to be made. and now, her nights were spent searching for excuses for her husband, and the worst part was that there were none. he wasn’t even drunk, nor could he say he was just lonely, or unhappy in his marriage. draco wasn’t the best with words, but he hadn’t ever lacked physical affection.
so why did you do it, draco?
-
he doesn’t know why he did it.
god, he really doesn’t, and if blaise hadn’t already drummed his own stupidity into his head, perhaps draco could’ve gone ignorant for a little while longer, and pretended like all was fine in the world.
so many times he’d picked up the muggle device and opened contacts, heading straight to the pinned id of ‘Y/N’. his fingers played with the message icon, then adjusted the profile picture which was a photo taken off guard of Y/N (one he remembered she’d tried tackling him to the ground for taking, and to this day still thought had been deleted), then formed multiple texts to send. he’d stare at the clicking text caret, then at the words he’d typed either in an agonisingly slow speed or a franticly quick rush until they didn’t make sense at all, and he’d then click delete. maybe more mindless staring at past chats - past reminders that said to hurry home, that dinner’s on! - and draco would sigh and contemplate throwing his phone against the wall.
he couldn’t feel sorry for himself. he had no right to. this was his fault. blaise had listened to his babbling mess of an explanation, back on the night when it had all went bad and draco had showed up on his doorstep, seemingly unaware of the pouring weather and - was that also the rain that had trickled down his cheeks?
his friend had clapped him on the back and said, “s’alright, mate. you’ve just had a hard time, she’ll understand. you’re married, after all.”
what went unspoken afterwards was that there just wasn’t anything to understand, it was as clear as anything what had happened, and draco wasn’t the only one having a ‘hard time’.
then blaise’s words turned truthful. he gave advice, but also criticised him briefly for being so careless, so foolish. it was true, and did zabini think that he didn’t know?
“fuck, i know! you don’t have to keep rubbing it in my face, blaise.”
his friend had sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose - and god, was that how draco had looked on that night? frustrated, tired and couldn’t-be-bothered? - and said “i know, draco. but you’re not doing yourself any favours by sitting here and feeling sorry for yourself.”
before draco had had chance to glare and spit back a defensive insult, blaise had said, “you’re a mess without Y/N. you want her back?”
the silence in the room was shattering, and perhaps the sound of draco’s heart thumping ten times its average speed could be heard amongst it. his voice had turned soft and he sounded utterly defeated as he pathetically replied, “more than anything.”
blaise had shrugged and nonchalantly proposed, “then do something about it.” and left, turning back to his bedroom and shutting the door for that night. it was a gesture that simultaneously gave draco his space to think on blaise’s words, but also let both boys ignore the crack in draco’s voice as he was then left to try not to cry in solitude.
but blaise had been right, and so draco started planning how he was going to get his wife back, because an approaching date meant the perfect opportunity to do just that.
-
winter was long gone, and in the bright atmosphere that was the burning spring, it felt like all her problems had gone with it.
almost.
retail therapy was crucial, and Y/N had found just the perfect place downtown to go. she wouldn’t have to worry about meeting familiar faces because it was central london - muggle london.
cherry blossom trees were fluorescent in pink and fluffy petals, and they blanketed the floor in a mockery of the cold snow that had covered the pavement just months ago. the sun trickled down through the branches and, perhaps if that boutique labelled ‘marva’s’ wasn’t calling out in all its pretty glory and promise to solve all her worries temporarily, then Y/N could’ve tilted her head up and savoured the warmth on her face.
after exiting the lovely place that offered summery dresses and the perfect accessories to go with them, she realised that her arm felt awfully off balance with a rather heavy shopping bag in her left hand. her right hand needed a weight, and so her eyes danced down the street, then landed on ‘harrods’. if there was any place that she needed to stop at, it was this.
the cake slices that they sold were ones she deserved, and after the event which she’d avoided thinking about on this particular day, she certainly could treat herself to a little dessert. and, being one of the brightest students in hogwarts, it had paid off into a very well paying job, so the bottom of her purse was almost unreachable.
something in her busy day had kept her distracted, and so Y/N walked with more life in her step than she had done in months. it was when she was searching the shelves, past the shops that smelt like expensive perfume and real leather, that a deep voice sounded from behind her.
“Y/N?”
she froze.
was she ready to see him again, even after all this time? it’d only been a season, had draco really thought over his mistake already?
she turned around to find a tall figure, dressed expensively smart. his posture was familiarly classy and upright, but he also had that boyish charm about him.
her breath hitched in her throat, and the cake was forgotten about.
“theo?”
-
he’d do whatever it took to get her back to him, and so the plan was soon set in place because, once draco had his mind on a goal, he accomplished it.
the finest money could buy; he knew Y/N, and he knew flashing his money wouldn’t be what impressed her, but rather the effort he put in. still, that didn’t mean he couldn’t splurge out for her.
the final part of his scheme involved something he could make delicious, customised to his wife’s favoured flavours and decorated with endearing words. in simpler terms - draco needed a cake.
he pulled out his muggle device and typed a quick location into a search engine, and once he found a place where the prices were just as high as the stakes, he clicked ‘directions’ and apparated into an isolated park nearby.
yeah, definitely the right choice. draco could see that, although not the most materialistic girl in the world, Y/N would’ve gushed over a place like this. he crossed the high street, half admiring the pretty blossoms and warmth of the sunshine on his face, half wishing and almost imagining the feeling of her hand interlinked through his.
inside, it was definitely beautiful. expensive stores boasted about all they had to offer, and the scents of all the perfume and cologne stations mixed into the aromas of different materials - leather, fur, clean linen. despite it being a muggle place, draco fit right in: everyone here was of a certain standard of wealth, and held themselves like it.
beauty. everywhere. he mindlessly walked towards his target, and saw the most beautiful thing yet.
it was a familiar laugh that had brought his attention to it, soft and polite - the kind used in a public eye. he’d spun around instantly once he’d heard it, and then almost regretted it once he registered the scene before him.
okay, maybe this was the wrong choice.
his lover stood there, glowing with what time had provided of ‘healing’. her smile was radiant, her eyes the same, almost as bright as the sparkling band around her ring finger, still glorifying the fat diamond on it. there she was.
talking to another man.
one that was oddly familiar…where had he seen this bastard before?
draco made to storm right over, then stopped himself. god, was he stupid? he’d just done…that a few months ago, and now he felt like tearing these fancy fucking walls down just because he saw Y/N talking to someone who also happened to be a guy?
he calmed himself, then set the second plan of this week onto action. draco casually wondered along the shelves, pretending to peer through the glass casings while really trying to be as subtle as possible.
then, he bumped into her. he turned slowly and made sure he primarily sounded like he usually did with strangers, “sorry, i didn - Y/N?”
her eyes tore off of the man and widened, and draco had to remind himself of his current situation before he lost himself in the seemingly perfect replica of a starry sky in them. she always was the most beautiful.
he had to swallow briefly to clear the rising guilt before he uttered his next words. “you…look great.”
she smiled tightly, “hi, draco.”
and just like that, just from hearing his name from her lips again, the cake was forgotten about.
-
he was here. he was really, really here.
it wasn’t just another figment of her imagination (because, god, had Y/N been seeing her husband everywhere since that night), but he was stood right there.
draco had said she looked great, but he looked better than ever (probably due to not seeing him in seemingly so long). not necessarily happier than ever, because somewhere in those grey eyes she noticed that he lacked a certain smugness and joy about them, but he’d always been capable of taking her breath away just by being there. and, god, here he was.
how could he dress up in such an attractive, all black suit in this current situation? he knew Y/N loved when he put himself in that attire, it was like draco knew he’d be meeting her today.
or, perhaps, he’d just been to work today.
her eye flickered down in an act she hoped was discreet, and she had to stop herself sighing from relief when she saw that band around his ring finger. her gaze returned to his face straight away, and by the layered, weak smile they both shared along with the lingering stare, the two exchanged an unspoken conversation that felt forbidden to say aloud.
suddenly, her head shook and she realised how rude she’d been to poor theo. she gestured towards him, “draco, this is theo nott. theo, this is…”
she didn’t need to fret about how to introduce draco, even as the words ‘my husband’ fell onto her tongue in habit, because theo suddenly lit up and said, “malfoy! mate, it’s been so long! how’ve you been?”
draco furrowed his brows but accepted the ‘bro hug’ offered. “theo. it’s been good, actually. really good.”
Y/N stared at him in warning, and draco met her gaze for a split second to smirk before returning to his conversation. the move felt so normal, so familiar, that she felt a faint heat tint her cheeks.
even after all these years, and she was still blushing after draco.
she tuned back into reality, to whatever theo was currently exclaiming - “yeah, i just ran into Y/N here. we were just catching up - she’s married now, did you know?”
they’d all gone to hogwarts together, but Y/N had hardly spoken to draco during most of her years there. theo, on the other hand…
theo continued, “yeah, it’s weird. one minute you’re dating, thinking you’ll spend the rest of your lives together, then you meet her in the middle of harrods with a ring on her finger!”
she cringed, hoping draco maybe wasn’t smart enough to realise theo was directly referring to her. of course, it was a stupid pray. draco raised his eyebrows, and she felt his attentive look rather than saw it.
“yeah, time flies, doesn’t it?” draco replied.
the conversation then drifted, and theo pointed out, “you’re…married? congrats man, who’s the lucky woman?”
theo was charming, and he genuinely seemed happy to catch up with an old friend. draco, on the other hand, offered a smile that looked too familiar to a wince, and stared in boredom most of the time. she made the connection that they must’ve been close in hogwarts, so she tried to make herself small while they caught up.
the idea worked for maybe a millisecond, before draco did something that sent a temporary paralysis down her spine. he casually brought an arm around her shoulders, and pulled her into his side. he gave theo a lazy grin, flashed his perfect teeth and said, “you wouldn’t believe it, nott, but the lucky woman’s the one with the ring on her finger.”
theo’s smile faded as he flickered between the two of them, slowly processing everything. his mouth opened in an ‘o’ shape, and then he nodded. “you two…?”
Y/N laughed awkwardly and breathily, ready to push draco away. he knew what she was going to do - of course he did - and he instead brought his hand that was on her shoulder to the side of her face and turned it gently to face him. her eyes were so innocently wide and surprised, her posture frozen and apprehensive. draco’s smile grew, the smug, prideful expression making its way back onto his face for the first time in months.
his girl.
“yeah. us two.”
-
after a somewhat awkward goodbye, Y/N could only hope that theo had taken the whole situation well and wouldn’t think badly of them, because she didn’t stay to ensure it afterwards.
she’d tutted in agitation and taken draco by the hand, ready to lead him out of the shop so as to not make a scene in such an exquisite store.
draco’s possessiveness had its charms, but that was unnecessary.
Y/N could tell herself that she was most angry at the fact that he was being rude and immaturely defensive over her in front of an old friend, or that draco was being overly jealous before an old ex, or even that he showed up so easily after everything, playing the role of ever loving husband. in reality, Y/N was more angry at the fact that she couldn’t seem to control herself around him. it was unnecessary to show up looking so damn good, to smile at her like nothing was wrong, to wear his ring in reminder that, fuck, she just loved him so much, and finally seeing him made it just so much harder to remember to be angry at him.
the pair ended up on the sidewalk outside the entrance, and Y/N let go of his hand and spun to face him. draco refrained from smiling at the physical contact that she didn’t even seem to realise they’d kept for so long - well, only moments, but it was enough for him.
he tried not to smile at finally, finally being face to face with her, not just seeing those lovely features on a 2D screen, full of longing and regretful feelings. he tried so hard not to smile as Y/N started her angry rant.
“you’re unbelievable, you know that?”
draco raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to elaborate.
her eyes glanced around the street, trying to keep this looking like an ordinary conversation to passerbyers; draco knew that was Y/N’s way or throwing her hands up and exclaiming in frustration. her eyes told it all.
“that’s the first thing i get in months? you being - ” her hand waves in exaggerated disgust towards him, “whatever that was, and to one of your old friends of all people?”
any other argument, draco would’ve scoffed. “he was your ex, Y/N.”
she rolled her eyes and looked away, exasperated. “you always were like that.” his head cocked to the side, into her view of where she was glaring off to the side. she faced him properly and quietly yelled, “you blame everyone else but yourself! what does it matter that he’s ‘my ex’? it’s not like we were planning to get back together anytime soon, and it’s not like we were making out right there and then - although, you’d know quite a lot about that, wouldn’t you?”
draco shut his eyes briefly, frustrated and trying to block out another rise of shame. “don’t go there. you don’t know what these past few months have been like for me.”
“don’t i?”
he looked up. everything was there - her pain, her frustration, her own guilt, her suppressed love - all of it, painted in the canvas that was her eyes, interpretable only by the one who stood before her now.
he sighed, “you’re right, that’s unfair.”
if Y/N was surprised at how draco had admitted to being in the wrong for once, she didn’t show it. she listened with a enlightening feeling in her stomach as he said, “i’ve been an arse. i’ve truly, truly been an arse. i’ve regretted that night more than anything - from what i did, to how i handled it. god, if i could go back - ” draco took both her hands into his and came closer, “i would’ve fought for our marriage, and we could’ve fixed it then and there. i would’ve begged, if that’s what it took.”
Y/N felt a lump rising in her throat, so kept quiet. some part of her mind was still screaming in protest at the feeling of forgiveness that floated back, and so she didn’t feel like adding a sarcastic comment of ‘draco malfoy begging? in my dreams.’
she took one look at his face and almost sighed in relief again, because she knew he meant every word he said about feeling regret, and that was all she wanted. but still, that begrudging feeling had lodged itself in her chest, so with every ounce of effort that she had, in a motion that went against every instinct she’d grown, Y/N pulled her hands gently away from draco’s hold and managed to get a few words out without her voice breaking, or coming out strained.
the strength in her voice almost broke him as she said, “but you didn’t.”
draco felt a piece of him leave with her as she turned and stepped into the road, and then he almost lost that piece forever when he noticed a racing car come speeding with its horn blaring louder with every closing second.
in an act that felt like a simple, urgent reflex in his muscles and relay system, draco surged forwards and grabbed Y/N desperately by the arm, and yanked her back onto the street.
the car roared its beeping after a few moments, then continued to drive at crazy speeds down the high street as strangers on the street narrowed their eyes at it.
but to the car, it’s driver, the strangers on the street - none of them were paid any attention to by draco, nor Y/N. he pulled her straight into his arms and felt her once rigid figure turn shocked and soft, melting into him as she buried her face into his embrace.
draco tilted her head up and his hands rapidly searched her face, her arms, his love, looking for any sign of injury. “fuck, Y/N.”
she stumbled out her words, “i’m sorry. i…i didn’t realise it was there. jesus…”
he shushed her and slowed his movements, satisfied that she was physically fine. “it’s okay - fuck. be careful, you idiot.”
her next words were quieter as she registered the position they were in. she cleared her throat awkwardly and said, “i’m not an idiot.”
draco brought one of his hands to stable her on her arm, and his other nestled through her hair in an act of endearment. he’d done it so many times before, but why did it feel so wrong to do it now? the soothing touch of his fingers felt sacred, but not allowed, and Y/N absolutely hated the way it felt like the last time he’d ever do it.
to prevent that, she brought her own hand to his and held it there, against the side of her face. his eyes softened and there, in that moment, Y/N felt that lodge dissolve into nothing, into forgiveness.
their eye contact didn’t break - it didn’t feel like it was even possible to do so - and it left them both with racing heartbeats and breathless lungs.
she airily managed to ask, “what were you even doing here, draco?”
his eyes looked up as he broke out of his haze, searching reality for an answer. it dawned on him, and he remembered the cake. he grinned in amusement down to his wife and answered her question, “finishing off something. but it’s okay, it wasn’t crucial anyway. come,”
Y/N didn’t question where to, and draco didn’t take her hand and lead her anywhere, but rather just trust that she’d follow, in respect of her personal space and giving her time to make the choice - forgive, or not?
she followed him without another word.
she trusted him, and Y/N felt that she might follow draco to the ends of the world.
then, as he led her to a lonely part of the park and took out his wand to transport them somewhere, she remembered the cake she’d promised herself.
-
draco apparated them back to their home, and it’d been a confusing walk around the side of the manor and into their large garden.
there, amongst the trees and bushes in full bloom, and the centre pond with lovely koi, draco had set up a large banner. it was a satiny material, embroidered in what must’ve cost an absolute fortune to have made - ‘happy anniversary. forgive me, my love?’
the dreaded date had finally arrived, and none of the two could’ve forgotten it.
underneath, few balloons were weighed down around a small present, and Y/N flashed draco a look of intrigue and surprise before he nodded towards it. she almost giggled in excitement (but held it in, luckily) as she paced towards the box, feeling like every step was a step closer to normalcy in their life.
draco could feel his hope expanding and growing with every step his wife took, and he might’ve laughed as she collapsed onto the soft fielded ground and unwrapped the box if he wasn’t feeling so emotional and anxious.
inside the box was a leather book, but not a reading one.
Y/N had shaking hands by the time she opened the first page, and saw the title ‘the malfoys’ written in neat ink. it was draco’s writing.
the next page showed a photo from the first date they’d ever been on. a small date was written alongside it, and then a mini paragraph was scripted underneath. the next page showed more photos, then the next, then the next.
this book told their love story in chronological order.
each page had paragraphs, lengthy or short, surrounding every photo. they told stories of how draco had felt during the photo, how he’d come across it again, how much he loved spending time with her over anyone else. Y/N noticed at the end of each, there was a reason.
the latest one she’d read - ‘reason no. 9 why i love you: you were there for me to talk about my family, about my past, and you listened.’
reasons everywhere, dotted all over the book, splurged into every memory. Y/N smiled as she saw a photo of them at a muggle zoo, with draco holding her up on his shoulders while daphne and blaise took the photo for them. she ignored the blurring of her eyes as the pages turned again and again, then laughed through thick, suppressed tears as she saw an ugly photo of herself, taken off guard and one that draco had promised he’d deleted.
the final photo was their wedding photo, the only picture out of chronological order. ‘reason no. 50 why i love you: you love me.’
the book was concluded, and Y/N had read every single word inside. she’d traced her finger over every edge of the photos, relived the moments in her mind, and somewhere amongst it all draco had slowly edged beside her. he crouched down, watching her every reaction, and she turned to look at him through the blurriest of eyes.
he smiled weakly at the muffled colour of her eyes through the over-saturation of tears, and waited patiently for her choice.
she nodded and laughed weakly once more, “i can’t believe you did this.”
he chuckled and offered a hand, standing up and helping her follow suit. Y/N yanked him into her, abruptly ordering his arms to wrap around her as she sunk into her husband’s chest for the first time in months. it felt so good that she could’ve cried even harder - perhaps she did, but she didn’t know. she was too busy taking in the feeling of his large hands soothing up and down her back, the smell of his cologne that she’d missed so much, the feel of his warmth entangled into hers.
“you’re unbelievable for this, draco.” she mumbled into his shirt.
his chest shook as he chuckled, and he pulled back to tease, “tell me again how i’m unbelievable?” he smiled obnoxiously, and something in it made Y/N roll her eyes.
she reprimanded, “you’re too cocky for your own good.” but she had a smile behind the glare, and draco had never seen a prettier sight.
a throat being cleared shook the two from their moment, and both simultaneously turned to see a friend in the garden, a pastel pink box in hand.
blaise grinned in greeting, “so i see you two made up?”
draco threw an arm over his wife and nodded, and she felt a small blush as she tried to do the same.
in exaggerated disappointment, blaise gestured to his box, “looks like this was pointless, then.”
the couple walked towards it, and blaise opened the top to reveal the harrods logo imprinted in gold on the top.
inside, a large, lavish cake lay. it was huge, and must’ve been quite heavy despite the easy way blaise handled it.
draco chuckled, and Y/N laughed in irony as she read that the icing was carefully piped to say, ‘forgive your husband?’
in which unfaithfulness tempts him amidst a life that drains him
see here for part two
the door would’ve been slammed shut if it weren’t for the fact that he wasn’t in the mood to draw more attention to himself. the exit / entrance of the main auror’s department led out to the streets of central london, in a non-muggle part of it. the office was set on a little street corner, although the building itself was great in size and almost ancient.
draco loosened his tie and pulled his collar down slightly, just enough to alleviate some tension but still look somewhat presentable. he waited for the tourist wizards to pass by on a cart drawn by horse with a clenched jaw and tight eyes, stood by the door he’d just come out of that held the most stressful environment a wizard could imagine.
the wheel of the cart jolted as it slipped into a small puddle by the curb, and maybe the gods were laughing at him by the way a clap of thunder suddenly broke out from the grey sky above, then the water splashed onto his expensive shoes and wet the very bottom of his designer trousers.
his briefcase would never be lost in his ever tightening grip, and draco glared around at everything and everyone as he finally crossed the road and headed straight for a quiet tavern.
the shallows, the oak sign read. the inside was hinted at through a large, non-tinted window - few business men sat around the counter with noticeably large gaps between eachother, one couple in a booth by the left, and the bartender contently scrubbing the inside of a glass with a cloth.
draco pushed open the door and heard the bell ding above him. he headed straight for the counter, in the centre where a five-stooled gap lay in invitation for him. his briefcase was dropped to rest against the counter on the floor, and he mumbled some drink to the bartender before pulling out his phone.
Y/N had introduced him to these devices after they left school, claiming they would be much more modern and easy than owls. a few weeks ago, he could’ve smiled at the thought of her alone, but now he couldn’t even bring himself to answer her message. his thumb hovered above the notifications from his wife - ‘dinner’s ready, i’ll be waiting.’ ‘everything okay love? how was work?’
draco didn’t know what to even say. ‘yeah, work is great. we’re swamped with more cases than ever, and it all seems bloody never ending.’ he couldn’t help but feel like all these ‘turned bad’ witches and wizards just served as reminders for what he could’ve been, what he once was. the sleepless nights were taking a toll on him, and now his eyes started turning heavier every day, and his mind now turned blurry at too much motion. all day he felt dizzy, but if he couldn’t concentrate during the day, how would he get his work done? he’d have to make up for that during his own time, which just meant more hours that he spent awake in his office at night, when he should’ve been asleep in bed beside Y/N.
in all fairness, she’d been great at trying to help. Y/N would wake up at odd hours and come downstairs with drinks for him or just to wrap a blanket around his back while he sat at the desk, surrounded by paperwork. she’d always wrap her familiar arms around his neck and mumble a few tired words, then give the explanation that she “couldn’t sleep without you.”
he pushed those moments to the back of him mind and swiped ‘clear’ on the messages, because he’d be home soon anyway. one drink, then he’d go back to the paperwork waiting for him.
“bad day?”
draco’s head snapped to the right at the stool being pulled back, then the lady who sat herself in it. he hadn’t noticed her, but the purse and coat that lay discarded on the edge of the counter told him that she’d previously been sat in the dark corner, unnoticed.
she crossed her legs under a casual smart dress, long and young and covered in sheer black tights. her posture was sophisticated but mildly flirtatious, her eyes more so the latter when she rested her chin onto her palm. her head tilted to the side as she waited for an answer.
draco looked back at his phone and played with it mindlessly. “yeah.”
“i’ve never seen one of those - a muggle device, is it?”
he paused his movements and then tucked it back into his blazer’s inside pocket, met her eye briefly and nodded.
despite his lack of engagement, the woman carried on speaking, “are you halfblood, then?”
draco now moved his head to fully look at her and fought the habitual urge to furrow his eyebrows. many years ago, he would’ve scoffed and been offended. now, he merely replied, “malfoy. draco malfoy.”
that answered her question.
whether malfoy sparked recognition in her or not, she didn’t show it. “melody flint. pleasure, mr malfoy.”
the name reminded him of something…
his head perked up, “flint?” her eyes were wide as draco actually started to interact like a human being, “by any chance, is your brother marcus flint?”
she smiled kindly and let out a breath, “cousin. quite distant relatives, but we’re basically cousins.”
draco nodded and thought for a second. god, all those times that marcus had scolded him for a mistake in quidditch, and that was when they were both teens in hogwarts. now, they were both grown men, working somewhere that could be across the world from eachother with entirely separate lives.
“why, you know him?”
he nodded, “we used to go to school together. he was quidditch captain before he left and…well,” he fought a prideful smirk, “before i took over.” draco rubbed his eyes tiredly, fighting back the memories that tried returning. he needed to focus on the present - get these drinks in his system, then get home. to Y/N.
to his wife.
he turned to melody, the girl who tilted her head further in curiosity at him and smiled again.
“he’s a handful, isn’t he? i don’t know how you dealt with him, especially as captain.”
he chuckled and nodded, then was taken by surprise as she mused, “so, were you always this solemn looking?”
his previous amusement was wiped away and he slowly turned to fully face her. his eyebrow raised, and she elaborated, “you just…i’m sorry, i know it’s not my place, but you just looked so sad.”
he shook his head, “i’m not sad.” despite the kindness in her tone, he spat the word back at her.
“i’m stressed.”
she kept quiet but not in intimidation of him, rather in invitation to let him just talk.
and he did. “it’s just too much, everything is too much. i’m not sad, it’s my fucking job that’s never ending. it’s the people who just can’t live a moral life and causes us to go rushing out and ‘catch’ them, and would you believe that each person comes with three files and a pile of paperwork?”
melody nodded, taking in his words. draco glanced over at her figure, but not once at her eyes, and exhaled heavily. “god, i don’t know why i’m telling you this.”
she hummed in a strange sort of understanding. “it sounds awfully exhausting, draco. but it’ll get better, you know? it’s gotta all be worth something,”
he shrugged.
melody carried on, “sometimes life throws you in the midst of a storm, but there’s always the end of it to come. but…there’s also lots of opportunities to turn your life around,” her hand rested onto his bicep softly, “like new people we meet along the way.”
draco glanced over again, barely acknowledging her in the middle of all his thoughts. her fingers danced downwards slowly, trailing down the dark material of his sleeve before tapping his ring finger, and right onto the heavy diamond that decorated the marital band. “or…the relationships we already have.”
he pulled his hand back and under the counter.
she giggled, “how’s your marriage going for you?”
draco took a look at melody properly for the first time this evening. her eyes were bright and bold, even under such dreary lights of the tavern. her hair was neat despite the horrid, humid weather outside, and her skin looked enticingly soft. she was definitely around the same age as him, but her aura was just youthful, pure, refreshing. her legs were still crossed, her figure perfect, and her last name flickered in draco’s mind. a family of the sacred twenty eight. a different person ago, that would’ve been enough for draco to walk out of the bar hand in hand with her and take her home - either to his parents, or to his room. but draco wasn’t that person, and he was changed. draco was married. draco was on the way to redemption. draco had the perfect job. draco was…tired.
he tilted his head and made sure his voice was quiet, because if melody didn’t hear his words maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing, and if anyone else didn’t hear them either then surely they were never said to begin with.
“meet new people, you say?”
-
she’d been waiting for over an hour. usually, he was home by half six, seven at the latest. it was half eight, and the night had long since gone into the darkness of itself.
the clicking of the door usually made her jump up from the table, but not today. Y/N stayed seated at the dining table, beside the cold home-cooked meal and the phone that was silent all through the evening.
draco took a whole six minutes to hang his coat up, take his shoes off and then come through to the dining room. his steps were slow, almost as slow as the minutes had ticked by while she waited for him.
he looked at the scene before him.
Y/N was at the table, slumped against the chair with remnants of her elegant posture from a few hours ago. dinner was clearly cold, and it was so lacking of steam that it looked almost fake. his voice broke through a thick layer of guilt as he murmured, “i’m sorry.”
her eyes were tired; after all, she’d been to work, cooked dinner, then stayed in the same seat for hours waiting. “for being late?”
Y/N was always a smart woman. draco was good with his words, but she knew this. she knew he wasn’t merely sorry for being late.
it was Y/N that spoke again once he couldn’t even muster up the confession, “what happened?”
draco felt the press against his chest. if he could take it back, he would.
actually, wasn’t that just what they said in books and films? would he take it back?
she watched as he searched the room as he thought to himself, and she could only hope he wasn’t contemplating lying. perhaps that would be the worst outcome of it all, alongside draco preparing to tell her he didn’t love her anymore, or that he wanted a divorce. wait - her mind was getting ahead of her. that’s ridiculous.
so many times did Y/N play with the rings on draco’s fingers, and specifically the one on his fourth comforted her more than anything.
so…why were his hands stuffed inside his pockets?
“i’m sorry.”
the past few married years of her life came crushing down on her chest, all the absolute bliss of it turned into pain and a waste of effort. those two words confirmed her worst fear, the one thing she thought she’d never have to face. Y/N didn’t realise how at ease she was before, and how sure she was with herself - with draco - that he hadn’t actually done anything. that her husband would come home and tell her that he loved her, that he was sorry for being late, that work held him up.
that his phone died, maybe even broke entirely, so he couldn’t send her that reply anyway.
that his biggest regret right now was missing dinner, and not whatever he’d been doing the past few hours - if he regretted it at all, that is.
she stood up after a moment, wanting to throw all the food onto the floor. she gathered up the anger and threw it into her words, narrowed her eyes and slowly said, “tell me, draco. what did you do?”
he leant against the doorframe and pinched the bridge of his nose, scrunching his eyes. “god, i don’t know. i really don’t fucking know.”
“just say it. if you could read my message, know that i was here, waiting, and still do whatever it was that you’ve done, then you can admit it to me now.”
he took a step forward and raised his voice ever so slightly, “you know already, why make me say it?”
Y/N rounded the table, “i waited for you, draco.”
“yeah, i know, and i’m sorry that dinner is - ”
“fuck the dinner! i’m talking about these past few months. every night, i’ve waited for you to come to bed, to come to me, tell me about how difficult work has been - fuck, i don’t know, anything! i would’ve helped, i would’ve done everything in my power to make it easier for you - or have you forgotten what your wife is here for?”
draco scoffed, “don’t. you don’t get to make me out to be evil, it was one mistake.”
his eyes told everything, and he definitely regretted what he said after. he knew her, he knew his wife’s boundaries, and it wasn’t just one mistake. it was then that draco realised what he’d done.
he’d been fretting over her reaction, over an argument, over admitting his actions, but he hadn’t once thought of the long term consequences. this was -
“one mistake? you still haven’t told me what you’ve done! though, it must be one hell of a story. go on, i’m listening.”
he went to instantly reply, then his words failed him. draco stuttered something, spluttered something else, then shut down altogether.
then started back up again.
his voice was quiet as he finally, finally admitted it. “melody flint.”
Y/N stopped thinking. the anger was wiped away, and she let her arms just hang at her sides as she let the reality set in. this was happening, wasn’t it? her chest constricted as if she was crying, but absolutely no tears could come out. she was beyond crying. this was…
this was the end.
“why couldn’t you have just come home?”
draco looked down at the carpet, then his eyes accidentally flickered to the meal that had been cooked by the one woman he’d ever loved.
he couldn’t offer her a valid response or even a try for an excuse, and so he just sighed and walked over to Y/N. it was the only action that had felt natural all night, as draco wrapped his arms around his wife and sighed into her hair.
she was so tense beneath him, but she allowed it, because this was goodbye - maybe not forever, maybe not a divorce in technical terms, but this was certainly the end of something, if…perhaps temporary.
the apologies came flowing against her skin, each one more meaningful than the last, and then the tears came. he didn’t even realise they were there, but they just flooded his cheeks and washed down the pink tinted skin, then soaked a part of Y/N’s shirt.
maybe it was a particularly nasty coincidence, or the stars were truly against him right now, because draco then noticed this was the shirt Y/N wore the day he proposed. oh, how could he forget that day.
and that reminds him.
he stuffed a hand into his pocket and ignored the tears that he didn’t yet know existed, then retrieved a gold band. a thick diamond adorned it, and he handed it to her without another word.
for her.
Y/N looked at her palm, tear ducts dry but everything in her body screaming in agony. it hurt to keep her eyes open, it hurt to stand up straight, and it hurt to think beyond this very moment; what had already happened, and what will happen.
she glanced at draco’s limp hand that hung at his side, and touched it. she pulled it slowly towards her, and slid the ring back where it belonged.
the couple got a familiar feeling that this had happened before, a few years ago, atop an extravagant altar.
she finished, and dropped the hand instantly. he got the message, so draco turned and left to get his coat, put his shoes back on, and whatever came after, he wouldn’t know. maybe he’d call blaise, see if he could stay there for a while.
Y/N stared at where her husband had walked out of for another long half hour before finally walking away, leaving the long forgotten meal sat on the table. she slumped against the massive, too empty lounge in the living room, because she couldn’t bring herself to have another lonely night in her bed.
draco walked out the door, forgetting the name melody flint instantly. he stared at his ring for long minutes, wishing it could pull back the woman who’d touched it only moments before.
in which the oblivious pair are essentially forced by a chanting crowd
put me in my own story PLS
a mid winter’s match meant two things; one, we were halfway to the finals for quidditch, and therefore halfway to finding out who the winners of the quidditch cup would be; two, the players might’ve been sweating underneath their uniform from effort and self inflicted stress, but the audience in the stands were freezing.
me included. the multiple layers i wore did nothing to fight the cold, and my thick gloves felt so useless that i had to shove my numb hands into the pockets of a puffer coat i had borrowed from theo, who’d left it for me on the back of the common room lounge with the note - ‘take it, you always whinge about the cold. TN.’
okay, so he knew me well. theo had been my friend through parent connections for years, and yet i always teased that i couldn’t name one good thing that he’d ever brought me. as an example, he was who had introduced me to our current group of friends; draco, and the slytherins that he deemed ‘worthy’ enough to hang around with. just at the thought of him, i scoffed, but it came out as more of a sniffle against the currently falling snow. he was such a pretentious prat, and just the image of him made me want to topple off of these stands.
i’d sat myself in the far back corner, one of the best spots contrary to popular belief. from the top, i could see everything (okay, so it was further from the actual action, but sitting down there would be asking for a bludger in the face).
perhaps i hated draco so vividly that i’d conjured up some nightmarish vision of him, approaching in just as many clothing layers as i had. i frowned as the tall figure approached, and then felt like crying in disappointment as it spoke.
“don’t look at me.”
okay, so not a faux image. i grumbled something that was a mystery to both draco and me (but implicitly negative), and turned back to the empty stadium. the audience was buzzing with anticipation, ready for the game to start with bated breaths, and i was buzzing from the cold, waiting for the game to be over with visible breaths in every exhale.
it only made everything worse when the devil incarnate seated himself beside me, blowing into his black gloved hands as he, too, looked ahead.
i didn’t turn to him as i said, “why sit here, of all places?”
“do you see anywhere else i can sit?” he replied, sounding as reluctant to be here as i felt.
a quick glance around the slytherin section made me realise that indeed, there was pretty much no where else to sit. just because i could, i edged away as much as i could without bumping into the stranger of a girl next to me, feeling draco turn just to scoff.
“don’t flatter yourself, Y/L/N.”
“why are you even here, malfoy? i never see you at these games unless you’re in there,” i said, nodding towards the still empty pitch.
“only to see how shit gryffindor play. plus, flint sent me to see how their tactics have changed - lazy git couldn’t be bothered to do it himself.”
i rolled my eyes. his language was disgusting, and him and our other friend - blaise - rubbed off on eachother awfully. he looked at me as if i was up to something, “what are you doing here?”
“i had nothing better to do, but i usually come to these games anyway; you just miss me being here.”
he hums and says sarcastically, “how could i ever do that.”
“because your head’s too far up your arse.”
my retaliation was instant, naturally rolling off of my tongue because me and draco malfoy didn’t just converse - no, we bickered. we squabbled. we argued. we fought. we were like children when it came to eachother, that much i could admit. but he took it to a whole other level, and sometimes i was convinced the bleached dye had soaked into his brain and damaged all cells.
he breathed out a laugh, ironic and like he shouldn’t have expected anything less from me. “okay, Y/N.”
i held out my index finger, “actually, that’s not right. sorry.”
he furrowed his brows and looked in disbelief, and i almost laughed as he glared at me in suspicion.
i finished off, “it’s too far up blaise’s arse.”
draco sharply inhaled and immediately opened his mouth to retaliate, then was interrupted by the announcer lee jordan bellowing into his mic, “hello, and welcome to another quidditch match of the season! today’s game - gryffindor versus ravenclaw!”
a massive applause drowned out whatever draco had meant to say, and we both turned towards the field to see all the players start to fly out. i clapped along with everyone else, and noticed draco merely offered a single tap of his palm before scowling something i could lipread as ‘get the game started already.’
i nudged him, still going along with the applause, “patience is a virtue, malfoy.”
“good thing i have many other virtues to make up for it, isn’t it?”
i rolled my eyes, wishing i could only smack the smirk off of his face. god, he could be so proud.
the captains shook hands, and then a whistle blew and they were off. jordan was brilliantly hilarious at commenting during the game - i’d even occasionally caught draco laughing under his breath at something he’d said. it went unspoken afterwards, but it was refreshing to see anything genuine on that bratty face of his.
potter was doing the bare minimum; hovering slightly above the game, spectating and offering cheers and ‘oh no’s at the appropriate time, and occasionally spinning to avoid a bludger. it was actually draco who pointed it out to me, otherwise i wouldn’t have even noticed the kid.
he’d nudged me and edged closer, then leaned into my ear so that i could hear him over the loud cheering, “potter’s making himself useful, as always.”
i’d responded by breathing out a laugh, and turning my head to face him briefly for it. it’d been a shock to both of us when we realised how close our faces were, and it took a shove from me to get him a decent distance away. “shove off, malfoy. personal space.”
he sneered, but didn’t say anything. god, how i hated that attitude of his - i’m draco malfoy, i’m too good to talk to you.
too good my arse, blondie.
some gryffindor chaser was racing with the quaffle next, and everyone watched as three ravenclaws tailed him with their dominant arm outstretched to catch him. the goals were coming closer, and multiple gryffindors made themselves open for a pass just ahead of them.
we watched the boy make a split second decision; who to pass it to? he slowed as his mind thought through the easiest option, yet the ravenclaws only sped up. my hand shot out to grab something, to stable myself, to calm the atmosphere, because for some reason i was on edge as i watched the boy be swarmed and enclosed by his opposing players.
the ball flew up and launched itself into the direction of another gryffindor chaser - a girl, this time. she caught it with ease and set off for the goals, few tens of metres away.
the ravenclaws instantly ditched the previous boy and raced for her, but it was far too late. she slowed, she arched her arm, she aimed and…she scored.
i let out a breath i hadn’t even realised was caught up in my lungs, and felt my hands relax. the audience on the other side of the stands cheered, and i heard the slytherins around me grumble at the gryffindors’ score.
“why are you so overjoyed at the little shits scoring? anyone would think you’re one of them.”
i looked at draco to see his face contorted into disgust. “god, you’re so dramatic, you know that? i just didn’t want to see some kid plummet to the ground, that’s all.”
he spluttered in exaggerated shock, mouth gaping open as if he could hardly believe what i was saying. “me? dramatic? look who’s talking! having to grab onto me at every little moment - what’s the matter, Y/N? nervous the little gryffindors might get hurt?”
i forced my face to stay blank, bored if anything, and ignored the heat blooming onto my cheeks. i had not intended to…grab his arm, or give him the satisfaction of thinking that i could ever stomach touching him.
he continued, “it’s not like the ravenclaws can do much harm anyway, relax.”
his hand came to comfortingly lay on my arm, his features knitting into a faux, sympathetic smile as his posture started to lean closer, as if i was a child who needed reassuring.
i whipped my arm away and glared at him. “you’re ridiculous. come on, just watch the game.” a figure in the pitch finally flying into action caught my attention, and i perked up. i nodded towards him, “besides, i don’t think you wanna miss your boyfriend’s big moment. i suspect he’ll win this match today.”
draco’s eyes followed mine, and almost immediately landed on potter. i snorted as his face turned repulsed, more so than i’d ever seen today, and he slowly turned back to face me.
“say that again, Y/N. i dare you.”
my index finger tapped my chin and i playfully looked off to the side, “hmm, which part? that gryffindor will win? that you’re ridiculous? or…was it that you and har - ”
a palm slapped onto my mouth before i could finish it. his eyes were wide, and i laughed against his skin as he tilted his head at an angle. he mouthed ‘really?’ even though no one could even hear us over the sound of the audience and jordan bellowing into his mic. if i was any more immature, maybe i would’ve stuck my tongue out at his hand to get him off, but instead i resorted to just pushing him off.
“what’s the matter, can’t handle reality?”
he rolled his eyes, neither of us realising that in his abrupt act to shut me up had he jumped a lot closer than he’d been previously. “i don’t need these people hearing stupid things. you’re embarrassing me, Y/N.”
i pouted and furrowed my brows, about to accuse him of being mean when a voice interrupted.
“alright, losers?”
our heads snapped up in unison to the tall, familiar figure now walking towards us. draco grinned and stuck out a hand, to which he took in a strange sort of bro hug.
“what’d i miss?”
“not much, blaise. just draco being a prat, and gryffindor are ahead by twenty points.”
we watched in amusement as the slytherin who’d previously sat beside me glared at blaise, who excused himself to squeeze between us since draco was in the corner (my corner, but he’d taken stolen the end seat).
another boy joined a few seconds after, hands in his pockets and blowing a piece of hair out of his face. theo nott amazed me - the cold truly never seemed to bother him, no matter what. he had a scarf on over his uniform, and that was it. my mouth gaped open, “theodore, are you not freezing?”
he raised his eyebrows in ‘hello’, shoved draco over to squeeze onto the end (much to the dismay of the slytherin girl besides blaise, and to me and draco now stuck in the middle) and rested his elbows onto his knees. “well, some bitch stole my coat, so i’m left to freeze until she returns it.”
draco chuckled, then caught sight of the coat i was wearing. his eyes lingered at it for a while longer, then he turned suddenly to face theo. “the ‘bitch’ is Y/N?”
i rolled my eyes. “you lent it to me, you idiot. if you want it back, come and get it.” i stuck my tongue out like a child, watching draco as he pretended to be disgusted at me.
he turned back to theo. “why the fuck would you let her borrow it? she’ll leave a disease on it or something.”
“chivalry is not dead, as they say.”
blaise chuckled, then casually draped an arm around my shoulders. he did it to all the girls in our group - and, being amongst the tallest of the boys, it helped us feel warmer and almost protected (if only he wasn’t a silly little child at heart) - but i missed the fact that draco’s eyes glanced at it for longer than necessary.
i didn’t notice his shift in position, nor his sudden uncomfortable mood.
theo did. the two boys caught each other’s eyes and the brown haired one offered a tight smile, and a subtle clap to his back. he mumbled quietly, “it’s only blaise, mate.”
draco shrugged off his sympathy and grumbled back, “what do i care?”
jordan gasped, and the sound echoed around the entire stadium as he announced into mic, “that bludger’s heading straight for potter!”
the entire crowd stilled as we made anticipated sound over the race between harry and the change to not get pummelled by a roaring, ferocious ball.
the boy gripped the end of his broom and his lips moved, probably in the motions of willing it to hurry up. his head glanced back at the ball now chasing after him - tailing his broom and him, enchanted by its own charm to be intended on plummeting players to the ground.
he ducked into the wooden parts of the stadium where it held up the stands, then we watched as his figure started leaping up into view, then diving under wooden beams. i felt a tightness in my chest as i held my breath, waiting for the outcome to be revealed. a tightness echoed itself on my wrist, but i didn’t take notice of it.
then -
“potter’s been hit by a bludger sent by samuels! time out, madam hooch! that’s - ow! professor, he did that on purpose, i’m telli - ow! bolloc - ” the rest of his exclamations were drowned out by professor mcgonagall taking the mic from him, and announcing a timeout. the poor, albeit obnoxious boy was clipped by his ear and scolded, all the while the players flew down to check on harry’s physical state.
i finally exhaled and sat back into my seat, unsure of when i’d even stiffly straightened up in the first place. i took my eyes off the pitch just to let them wonder, especially after being stuck so intently on potter’s personal race, and realised what the tightness on my wrist was.
i opened my mouth to comment on draco’s hand that had wrapped itself on my arm, but his laughter interrupted me. he took it off anyway, only to fling his entire arm around my shoulders and pull me closer in an abrupt, messy manner. “potter.” he spat, “can’t even stay on his broom for one game.”
i glanced over at harry. he looked fine, just a little shaken up if anything. he looked more than insistent on going back to play, but the rules state that timeouts must last for at least five minutes before the game starts again. quidditch is quite dangerous, after all.
i grimaced at our proximity, “i get you’re happy over any chance to talk about your loverboy, but i’m really not as enthusiastic as you. please, draco, be a dear and stop embracing me.”
his arm snapped away and he lightly shoved me into blaise, who’s hands came onto my shoulders to stable me, then he turned right back to that slytherin girl who he’d at some point started flirting with.
draco crossed his arms immaturely, “oh, do fuck off, Y/N.”
i laughed breathily, noticing how the snow had started to tint his cheeks and nose in a pretty shade of rouge. i tapped my index finger against his nose, “I would, but then who’d be here to annoy you?”
he grabbed the wrist of the hand i used and made firm eye contact that ordered me to leave him alone, but it only egged me further on to say, “come on, don’t pretend like you wouldn’t miss me if i got up and left, right now.”
his eyes narrowed and i practically felt the venomous tone of his words when he slowly drawled, “i wouldn’t miss you even if you toppled off of these stands.”
i smiled, inching closer to his face and ignoring the obstacle between us that was my hand still enclosed under his larger ones. “lies.” my voice was raspy under the cold, quiet under the taunt, but his eyes still darkened and sparked with a blaze of something intense.
perhaps he was about to retaliate, or even initiate the next move, but we were interrupted once more. not by jordan, but by blaise. his elbow nudged my back, slightly pushing me towards draco as his entertained voice sounded out, “god, if you two would stop flirting for one minute, then maybe you’d realise you’re both on the big screen. idiots.”
draco looked past my head, tilting his head slightly and narrowing his eyes, “blaise, what the fuck are you on about?”
my head turned and i looked at him too, just as he grinned and nodded towards the pitch - what should’ve been an empty pitch. in the middle, a large screen had been charmed in the centre, mirrored within a spell so that everyone could see at any angle. we both slowly looked at it, seeing blaise’s grinning face once again staring back at us.
my eyes widened to see the image of me on the screen do the same, then i noticed draco was staring at me. well, after a moment of attention i realised he was actually looking down, a pink tinge now infecting his cheeks that had no blame from the weather. past the never ending flakes of white fluttering down, i made out the large, flickering sign of neon pink letters, screaming down at us in a taunt - ‘KISS CAM!’
i turned to look at the real draco, who’s eyes glanced up in an almost bashful look. his brows raised and i almost smiled at how different the usually obnoxious malfoy son looked. time felt like it was speeding up as the audience started whooping and making an ominously anticipatory buzz of sound. my breath quickened and he murmured under his breath in a fast pace, “you don’t have to.”
i watched his figure jolt slightly forward as theo clapped him on the back, egging him on. i laughed breathily, “thought you were the one who hated me?”
“who says that?”
our replies were almost immediate, one after another as if time was slipping away all the while the audience waited for a…a fucking kiss.
he smirked, but his cheeks turned even pinker and his features were trying to suppress it. i ignored his previous question and hesitated for a moment, before mumbling, “we shouldn’t.”
despite my words, i found my face inching closer. draco shrugged and his eyes glanced downwards, spotting his desired target. “it’s what the people want.”
i could sense his exhales tickling my face now, his almost urgent breathing pattern such a contrast to the delicately trickling snow that fell against his eyelashes, perfectly matching his platinum blonde hair. i glanced at his lips. so soft. so enticing. it’d be worth pretending like we weren’t such foes (if, perhaps, it was not even as real as we’d previously thought) to get to meet those pink, alluring lips. i had an excuse to - what was stopping me?
i took a bottom lip in between my teeth, nervous for whatever reason. another cheer pushing us to ‘kiss!’ rang in our ears as i felt the warmth of my racing nerves bloom everywhere in my body.
i heard a, “oh, fuck this.” before i felt a hand place on the back of my head firmly, then the forceful push i needed to finally meet draco. i saw him lean in just before my eyes closed, and something snapped - a feeling like i’d been waiting for this moment, but i didn’t even know it.
then the moment was over, and we pulled away. it was a peck at best, ended by the shock of it actually settling in. the crowd ‘awed’ in unison, but not in a coo, more so in disappointment that it’d ended already.
i stared at draco, paying special attention to his brighter eyes and those lips that looked more and more dangerously addicting by the second. i nodded, and he nodded back. to what agreement? it wasn’t spoken, but then i grinned airily through a haze of something as i realised he’d gone back to staring at my lips, and said, “we should probably do it again. you know, for the people.”
“yeah, that hardly counted.”
i had time to just get out, “gotta make the one and only time count, yeah?” before the air was stolen from me and he more urgently came forward, his hand on the back of my head this time instead of a pushing blaise.
a low whistle then sounded out behind us, the words, “oh shit,” so distant in the moment, but enough to make us grin against each other. the students cheered much louder, seemingly more satisfied as we gave them what they wanted - they wanted, not us.
the screen must’ve shifted to a different couple, because a chorus of laugher and surprise echoed throughout the stands, but we didn’t pull away. his fingers entangled into my hair, an order to not let the moment end because it might actually be the last - if only our pride didn’t get in the way, or our strange facade of a feud didn’t simmer down.
his actions were unnecessary, because i hadn’t planned on pulling away anytime soon. i almost wished that i wasn’t wearing gloves, if only to be able to touch his skin and feel it underneath my fingertips.
it seemed an eternity went by, but simultaneously no time at all as we both pulled away. his lips were so much more red, now swollen and mirroring what i’m sure my own looked like. our chests were rising and falling desperately, his eyes so much more intense even after the kiss was over.
a kiss; so simple, but so impactful.
draco contemplated with himself for a moment before he finally said, “didn’t enjoy that at all.”
i shrugged, still slightly breathless, “me neither. this doesn’t mean anything.”
he nodded. “hardly counts at all.”
a pause, then the game started again. our eyes glanced sideways just to acknowledge it, and it was then that we realised how insignificant the match really felt, how little we really cared for it. our eyes flickered back at the same time, making almost suggestive eye contact.
i grinned. he smirked, and said, “wanna make it count?”
i giggled and took his hand, ready to lead us out of here and back to privacy. the audience was completely oblivious to our plans, suddenly enthralled by the match. before i led us away, i pulled him closer just to lowly speak into his ear, “come on, malfoy. show me how much you hate me.”
i went to pull away, and his hand firmly grabbed my chin to keep me there. his jaw clenched as he stared at me for a moment, amusement dancing in his eyes, before he deeply whispered back, “i lied. i’m so glad you didn’t topple off of those stands.”
