Helyer Creative

Creative and Lifestyle blog, written by a graphic designer and coffee connoisseur from Wales, UK.

[helyercreative]

How to Identify Yourself

Isn’t it weird that people identify themselves by their job title? I still remember the week I finished university, where I was no longer able to identify myself as being a student. I felt so lost. What was I? Who was I? It took a long four months before I found a job in my degree field of graphic design, and in those long days between, I felt it difficult to give myself a title. I had a job, but it was only ever meant to be a temporary one to bridge the gap before my career blossomed and I could finally consider myself a success. Well, that job lasted three years. And my graphic design job lasted two months. So now, not only did I not have my successful job title, but I actually had a failed identity behind me. I was no longer a student. I was no longer a graphic designer. I was just a failure. My bridging-the-gap job was my identity for a lot longer than I ever wanted it to be. I found other graphic design jobs, and then those failed too, I had my part-time job to keep me knowing who I was.

           Eventually, after three failed graphic design jobs and a year of event-led depression, I decided to take a break on trying to find my successful graphic design role, and just let myself work a mostly stress-free job for a while until my rhythm caught up with me again. After one year of working part-time, non-design roles, I found myself working three jobs at once: one as my original part-time coffee machine salesperson, one as a waitress in a posh restaurant, and thirdly, my favourite job as a photographer in a club. I worked three jobs at one time from February until June, sometimes working all three in one day and rushing around my city to fit them all in. I’m not sure how I identified myself then either, because I definitely was no designer anymore.

           I made a three-step to-do list on how I considered myself to be successful in the near future. Step 1: Get a job. This was written after I lost my final graphic design job, and I just needed anything to keep myself busy and sane, that’s where the waitressing job came in. Step 2: Make a photography website. It was something I had always wanted to do, and always put off. I made one eventually, but I only kept it running for one year. The final step, step 3: Move to Berlin. This was a dream of mine for years. Once I had it in place to move it sort of started to become my identity. People would ask, “oh what do you do?” and I could reply with something edgy like “I’m a graphic designer and photographer, but I’m about to move to Berlin.” So cool, right?

           But where did my identity go once I finally did move to Berlin? I still wasn’t a graphic designer. And my identity of being the edgy British girl who moved to a foreign city was lost when all of my friends were edgy people from other countries who all had the same idea as me. As much as I loved living in Berlin and had always wanted to be there, it seemed Berlin was the city for people who had never made up their minds. I rarely made any friends there who already had a solid career plan in place. Most people had either never gone to university or had thrown away their university career in order to start again in the German capital. And I was just another one of them.

           I still tried to be a graphic designer. I lived in Berlin for over one year and I applied to graphic design jobs continuously throughout. I didn’t receive even so much as an interview; I can’t remember if I even heard back from any of the companies past an automatic “no thanks” e-mail. I didn’t give up hope; I’d still love to work as a designer someday. But I had to face reality and look into other options. I had worked in a café since my third or fourth week in Germany, and other than a short Christmas job at one of Berlin’s esteemed Christmas markets, it was the only job I had in the entire time I lived there. Eventually I met my boyfriend, who lived in the US and we discussed ways I could move there to live with him, since his job prevented him moving out of the US at the time. I applied for design jobs to no avail, and eventually decided it was time to go back to school.

           Now, my identity is being a student once more. I study a masters in English with a concentration in creative writing in the US. I really love it. I still have plans to work in the creative industries once I graduate, or even working as a teacher of English as a second language. I am a little glad to have a two-year break where I can reidentify myself and discover more of how I want the world to see me, as well as how I’d like to continue seeing the world. I enjoy exploring the world through my words, while still dabbling in illustration and design. Hopefully I can mix the two together and find my identity once more.

           I think at the moment I’m happy identifying as a crazy girl with no home roots. I have lived in four different countries - England, Wales, Germany and United States - and have had jobs in many different industries. My boyfriend doesn’t like the idea of being rooted in one place either and I love that our home remains an open door for wherever life takes us. I think it’s so awesome that the modern climate allows, even encourages, people to change their identity so much. If we don’t like what we’re doing, why should we continue through a slog just to make others happy? My boyfriend and I have both moved countries because we weren’t happy in our home country, we have worked in multiple industries because we didn’t see ourselves working the rest of our days where we aren’t happy or appreciated. We encourage each other to push for greatness, to learn more every day and expand our interests and experiences and because of that I will be proud of however I choose to identify myself in the future.

[helyercreative]

How Being Heartbroken Made Me a Better Me

This time 14 months ago I thought I had the perfect relationship. I was in love with my best friend, and the best part was that all my friends and family loved him as much as I did. One day, he decided to break up with me. I felt like it was incredibly out of the blue, but there had probably been a few clues towards the end.

Amazingly and luckily for me, he stayed my best friend. Over a year since we broke up and I still consider him as one of my closest friends, I can tell him anything and ask for advice and I know I'll get an honest opinion that won't beat around the bush.

Although he broke up with me because it was the best thing for him, little did I know, it was the best thing for me. After we ended the relationship I didn't 'grieve' my loss, instead jumping straight into tinder with a new found single-gal confidence, I dated men left, right, and centre. These dates took me to both Italy and Germany, gained me some new friends who I still keep in contact with now, and some very funny messages to send to the BFF. It was a really sad period in my life, actually. And despite now being in a much better place mentally, I really don't look at that era of my life fondly.

Despite the Great Depression I was suffering through, I stayed good friends with my ex, going on both a family holiday with my family weeks after we broke up, and a second holiday with our friends a few months after with him.

This second holiday was exactly what my broken heart needed. I managed to see him for the caring friend he could continue to be, whilst also realising I am now (and have always been) a separate entity to him. He gave me space to deal with my anxiety and depression during this holiday, but supported me exactly when I needed. This holiday was where I had the brilliant idea to move to Germany. This decision feels like the moment my depression began lifting.

He no longer lived in the same city as me, but we talked a few days a week and he always made effort to visit for events with our friends. He encouraged me to push for everything I wanted out of life. Now he wasn't my boyfriend, there was less emotional attachment to our conversations and we had no need to get heated or argumentative (we didn't argue much as couple, but emotions get higher in those situations). He could advise me with a clear head and I could accept his advice truthfully.

Moving to Germany was something I'd wanted to do for years, but I knew I'd never do alone. And especially if I was in a relationship, I would have always stayed with my partner. But now I didn't have a partner, and I had a ticket to fly to Berlin, without anybody coming with me.

I moved to Germany nearly five months ago. I still date a lot here, and I find that the way my relationship ended gives me a lot of trust/commitment issues. However, thanks to having such a good friend in my exboyfriend and having him constantly push me, support me, and congratulate me, I've found I'm a whole new person since living here. Rarely do I have moments of anxiety that used to cripple my everyday life. Recently I felt a similar depressive episode as last year, and after suffering for more than a few weeks, I phoned my exboyfriend and he spoke to me truthfully and I took on his words and since then the depression has mostly lifted.

Me, living my best life in Germany

People say you often find yourself when a relationship ends, and despite always agreeing with the statement, I don't think I ever felt it for myself so much. But I really have found myself in the past year, and I have heartbreak to thank for it.

[helyercreative]

Life update

I haven’t written my blog as often as I was hoping to when I first started writing it. The last blog post talked about the fact I was about to go on holiday to Berlin with a lovely Australian Tinder boy. That was back in February, and it is currently the first of July, and now I live in Berlin. For real. 

A crash course in the last 5 months: I went on holiday to Berlin for 5 days, 2 of which were spent solo and I LOVED it despite it being -11 degrees. 3 weeks after said holiday, I went on holiday again to Denmark (with a day trip to Sweden) with my two best friends, and the whole holiday I talked non-stop about how much I wanted to live in Berlin. We were staying with a friend of one of my best friends, and he’s British and moved to Copenhagen to study and now lives with his Danish girlfriend (and even has a Danish accent when speaking English... despite being English!), it really really made me want to take the plunge to move to Germany. On the last day of our holiday my friend Hannah told me to book a flight and be done with it, after saying ‘maybe’ one too many times, she just booked one for me. She picked a random date - June 19th - and paid for a one way ticket to Berlin. She said I didn’t HAVE to use it to move there permanently, but I could if I wanted to. So that’s what I did. I had a leaving party, I quit my many jobs, I said goodbye to the cute boy I’d been dating for a month, and I moved from Cardiff back to Somerset to live with my family for a week, before selling a lot of possessions (not enough, really) and jetting off to Berlin. 

I’ve been here for 12 days so far, and I’m loving it for the most part. 

Fortunately and coincidentally, my friend Philippine, who I knew from Cardiff managed to secure an apprenticeship with the Berlin Opera House, and she found out she was successful on the same day that Hannah booked my flight. Her apprenticeship is just for the summer, so we decided to live with each other. The Opera building she’s primarily working in is in a place called Köpenick, which is just outside of Berlin city, in the more country and rural area. It takes about 20-40 minutes to get to the city by train from there. We’re living in a town slightly further away called Friedrichshagen (Pronounced freed-ricks-hagen), and it’s beautiful here. At first I was annoyed that it’s so far away from the city, but I think I’ve come to terms with it already. And I’ll only be living here temporarily, so once Phil moves back to the UK/France/Korea (she’s a busy gal), I’ll move into a new flat. 

On Monday (tomorrow) I start German language school, it’s expensive, but it’ll be worth it. I believe it takes around 6 months to get to a level considered as conversational, and although I do know bits of German I am started from the very beginner level, and I’ve booked 2 months of classes. I don’t yet have a job, and I guess now with language school taking up my days that could hinder me further on the job front, but I think it’s ok. 

I just wanted to update the blog with my new life, hopefully I’ll start posting more, as I try to find new creative outlets and get back into being a creative human (life took a toll on my creativity, but I NEED a way back in). I’ve started writing a journal, and will be attempting to start vlogging, or doing some kind of video work. 

Here are some photos from my first two weeks:

Brandenburg Tor/Gate

Der Dom - Berlin Cathedral (There was maintenance happening on the other half, so I took an artistic crop)

The Reichstag

Lake Müggelsee during sunset.

Schloss Köpenick - Köpenick Castle 

Lake Müggelsee

Charlottenburg castle

A walk I took near my house

Lake Müggelsee from Köpenick side

[helyercreative]

I’m going on another Tinder Holiday aren’t I?

Yep, from the author of ‘My Tinder Date and I Went To Rome, and All He Got Me Was This Lousy Reject Text’ I now must admit that I’m doing it all over again.

However, this time I’m going to the city of my dreams - Berlin, and I’m going with a guy who I met once back in November or October and we’ve consistently stayed friends. He’s Australian, loves drinking Rosé wine, and is currently travelling around Europe. I met him when he was visiting friends in Cardiff, through Tinder - obviously - where I’d actually photographed him at Live Lounge and he’d brought it up in our first Tinder conversation. He then moved to France, and we’ve talked on a regular basis since.

This ‘Tinder Holiday’ is going to be a lot different to the one with Dr Rome. Partly because the Aussie isn’t a dickwad, but also partly because we’re not dating, and don’t have any intent to date.

I’m going to Berlin on Tuesday, and meeting the Aussie on Wednesday. Which is a big deal to me, because if you’ve done your maths, that means I’ll be spending a whole day in Berlin alone. I chose to do that. The girl who is afraid to walk into Cardiff city centre with no reason, has chosen to spend an entire day and night in Berlin alone. Yep. As someone who actively wants to move to Berlin this year, I thought it would be a good test to see how I feel. I’ll be staying in a shared mixed dorm for my first night, before moving to a private dorm with the Aussie once he arrives.

Crazy? Maybe. But when I think of my Tinder Rome-ance, I remember that the holiday itself was fine. And the fact that I won’t go home to the same country as the Aussie means there’s literally no stress on ‘what next’ (unless of course, we fall madly in love with each other and can’t be parted…). It’s a way for me to spend some time with someone cool, in the city/country of my dreams, and because of the timing means I get a little snippet of what solo travelling would be like. So if it turns out well and I’m enjoying it, it’s probably going to be the start of a lot more adventures for me. However if it turns out I hate being alone, then it’s only one day and I’m more than able to cope with that.

I’ve been practicing my German, and I’m 42% fluent according to Duolingo (which is definitely real life, right?). I think it’ll be a really good way for me to build confidence, maybe make some friends, and just to do something a little bit different. The only thing that’s worrying me slightly is the Aussie is gunna book last minute flights and he keeps getting confused thinking we’re meeting in Belgium… so I guess only time will tell if he gets that right. More adventure for me.

[helyercreative]

Being environmentally conscious

I feel like 2018 is the year of the Vegan, and the Environmentalist, and the Open Eyed Millenials, and I am ALL for it. My 2017 New Years Resolution was to become pescetarian, and for the most part I’d say I was pretty successful doing it. Yes, I still continuously ate fish and seafood and dairy, and yes, on the odd occasion I did eat meat too (I worked out probably around a total of 25 times in an entire year, I don’t think that’s too bad going). I find it difficult to say no to meat, because I didn’t give it up for the animal cruelty side of the moral compass. Saying that, I do obviously fully understand the cruelty side, and agree very much that it is cruel to kill animals for our benefit where it isn’t a need and merely only a want, but I actually gave up meat to try to become more environmentally conscious. Hypocrites probably, given that I still eat a lot of fish. But I figure if it could help even a little bit, it would be better than adding entirely to the problem at hand. Now I didn’t research into the facts and numbers, but my housemate (a meat eater) told me just yesterday that veganism actually uses more water and is worse for the planet than a carnivorous diet. I didn’t argue because i literally didn’t know the truth, but interesting to know if that is true. The past few weeks I’ve made a mildly conscious effort to eat less dairy, especially where it’s easy swaps (milk and butter and the main culprits), I think Mayo and cheese will be the difficult swaps. I know you can buy vegan alternatives to both, but not in my local supermarkets, and I don’t know if spending money on car fuel plus the extra it costs to have alternatives anyway would benefit me just yet. This week alone I’ve made a conscious effort not to eat seafood, and decided I’m going to try to not cook any fish/seafood at home at least. On top of this I’m trying to not use plastic bags at all, especially because I won a super snazzy tote bag from Awesome Merchandise in the New Year. My main new choice and probably the reason I’m writing this very blog, is that I bought a menstrual cup (otherwise known under the brand names mooncup/divacup), and I’ve been using it for only 2 days but I already recommend it and am about 98% sold on the idea. For more than the environmentally friendly side of it, this choice makes me more aware of how my body functions but also, can keep it functioning as it should without absorbing bleached cotton into myself. As gross as it is it’s some how super cool to see all the blood that comes out. It looks like you’ve committed a massacre every time you remove it… which for me weird mind, is quite humorous. This year I’ve been feeling super minimalist and more in touch with the environment and other worldly things, and with the thought of moving countries sometime soon (hopefully) I’ve been thinking about what to do with all my stuff I don’t need or want. I always felt the need to sell my stuff so I could still benefit from it, but I think I’m just going to give it all to charity or shelters etc. I see so many homeless people in Cardiff every single day, and if I could help them at all I definitely feel like I should. Clearer wardrobe, clearer conscious, etc.

*Btw I’m trying to write a short blog every day. Because of my dire job situation, I thought writing with some form of semi-purpose might help me. Even if it’s just to get a subject off of my mind (I’m obsessed with the moon cup soz), but also it might help me with my creativity in other aspects, and just generally makes me feel less guilty about spending time on my computer whilst eating mini eggs…

[helyercreative]

New Years Mental Health Musings

The latter half of last year was super tough for me. I felt like I was on a burning ship in the middle of a horrific ocean storm. It started when my then boyfriend lost his job. In trying to be a supportive girlfriend, I was then thrown into a similar situation when I too, lost my job, only a mere few weeks later. He was not only supportive, but genuine in his support, knowing that it came from the same place. We were both thrown into this terrible situation, and we were in it together. Or so I thought. Not that he was ever non-supporting of me, but we both had a lot of stuff going on. He was in the middle of buying a house for his family and looking for a new career. Whilst I, who had ‘luckily’ found a new job within only two weeks of departing my previous job, had been going through an eye-opening shit time when the news of one of my friends committing suicide had broken out. Between his death and his funeral - an achingly long 4 weeks - I had started AND quit my new job. Maybe it was the job, or maybe it was the stress of my friend’s suicide playing on my mind, or maybe it was me, but I just could not get on with the job. From day one, I hated it. I came home in tears almost every day. I could never put my finger on exactly why I felt this way, but eventually after it building up so much, I walked out during my lunch break and never returned. Cowardly? maybe, but it was definitely for the best for me in that moment in time.

As someone who has struggled long term with mental health issues, I took my friend’s suicide especially bad. He wasn’t a close friend of mine, but it hit home very hard. I thought about him and his death, day and night for months after he passed, and even now I struggle to watch any films or TV shows or view images of anyone who has committed suicide in the way that he did. A week or so after my friend’s funeral, my then boyfriend broke up with me. It was horrible and heart breaking, and actually the first time I’d ever broken up with anyone in person, as well as the first time it had not been a mutual break up. We stayed friends. Absolute best friends, and even now months later I can still attest to that. But I didn’t face my break up. He had distractions, in finding a new job (he got one not long after the break up), and going to the gym every hour of the free time he had to train for his new future career, as well as visiting family and sorting out his new house. I ignored the fact we broke up. We were fine as friends. Never awkward, and actually still as close as were when we were together. But instead of dealing with the way I felt, I just jumped onto Tinder. And used dating as my therapy (side note: it doesn’t work). Slowly, I began starting to feel worse and worse in my mental state and self worth. Thinking that having a man’s attention for an evening would make it better, and overtime I would feel worse once he left. Tinder is a scary place for someone who feels so low. It was and is SO easy to get sucked in. After 3 months of this horrible Tinder dating cycle, I decided I would delete the app for good. I chose to do it as my new years resolution, how ‘first world’ of me. But as of yet, 18 days into 2018 (I actually deleted it around Christmas time) I have yet to return to the app.

I woke up on New Years day in France with a bunch of my best friends (including the illusive exboyfriend) and we walked down to the beach of the Brittany coast, and I felt so relieved and refreshed and truly felt whilst watching the waves crash that 2018 was going to change me. Deleting Tinder was probably one of the best decisions I have made in recent times. No, it hasn’t fixed all my problems; I still don’t have a full time job, I’m still not happy 80% of the time, and I still think dating is addictive and stupid and I would probably be back to it very easily. But it has opened my mind to a tiny tiny change I have made that has made me feel so much clearer within myself.

After thinking about this change, I decided to also delete my Facebook app and Instagram app. (note: just the apps, not the accounts), and it’s been about 4 days and I’ve felt a whole load more productive, mentally clearer, and less exhausted by what other people are doing all the time. The fact that now if I use Facebook or instagram it’s because I’m actively choosing to do so, rather than going on it out of habit because my thumb darts to the little square icon on my phone, means I’m wasted way less time using my phone. I’m not even interested in using it at all a lot of the time since I deleted those apps and I’ve been trying to focus more on being productive - even if it’s little things like tidying my room or cooking a nice meal - and focussing on my future - I’ve been looking at moving to Berlin - and it’s so much easier to do without an iPhone in your hand for 14 hours a day. Why did no one tell me this two years ago?

[helyercreative]

My Tinder Date and I Went To Rome, and All He Got Me Was This Lousy Reject Text

Part 2 of my first tinder holiday, and I suppose, the final instalment, if you can’t guess from the title. 

I actually had an extremely lovely time in Rome, and with my Tinder date, who me and my friends affectionately call ‘Doctor Rome’. But it came as no surprise to get a reject text from him upon returning home. 

He arrived at Cardiff Central train station on Monday afternoon, after I’d spent the day showing my new housemate Sam around Cardiff. It was nice to see him, and we got some errands done in town before dropping his bag off at my house, and heading straight out to the pub. Doctor Rome studied in Cardiff, and used to live near where I currently live, so he had fond memories of one of my favourite local pubs. After a few drinks we headed home and I cooked dinner for us and my housemates, which was nice as he had a few things in common with them and it wasn’t awkward or anything - also, bonus points to me because everyone enjoyed my food and I didn’t poison anyone. 

The next day we got a few last things we needed before my housemate drove us to Cardiff airport ready to fly out. Conversation flowed fine over a few pre-flight drinks, and we boarded the plane promptly. We’d checked in at different times so our seats were separate, and just as I’d got into a conversation with a lovely older gentlemen named Joe who I was sat next to, Doctor Rome announced he’d managed to get the man next to him to swap seats with me. Not gunna lie, the flight felt pretty romantic, sat hand in hand sleeping on each others shoulders as we flew into the sunset, total bliss. 

Arriving in Rome, Doctor Rome was in charge of directions and event planning (because if I was in charge nothing would’ve got done), we got a train from the airport to Termini station and walked the 15 minutes to our airbnb in Monti. After waiting for about 20 minutes for someone to show up, our host (along with her daughter, and pet dog, Lola) turned up. She was lovely and had a lot of awesome recommendations, which we followed all the food ones and weren’t  disappointed. Our apartment was really lovely, in a very historic old building in a tiny little street on a hill. That evening we went for a little walk around, because it was about 8pm by the time we’d settled in and we were both pretty tired. We found a cute little eatery that looked like it was popular and had some delicious food (Although Doctor Rome’s was a little questionable to look at), and then tried to hunt for a Gelato bar that had been recommended by his cousin. We unfortunately didn’t find it, but we found another one and I was not disappointed at all.

We settled down for the night with some Italian wine before I fell asleep on the sofa. 

Day 2 was reserved for Vatican City, as it was my only full day in Rome and it was the largest time consuming thing our tourist agenda had for us. We caught a metro and walked to the Vatican (Recommend to buy tickets online first to skip any queues, however we were there early enough that there were no queues regardless). I know nothing about history or culture of Italy, and I don’t have a strong desire to learn, but none the less it was still amazing to see everything this place had to offer. Lots of sculptures, and art works all incased within incredible architecture. You could look out the window and see St Peter’s Cathedral and beautiful views of Rome.

We visited the Sistine Chapel, which I was super excited for. I studied art throughout school/college/university, so obviously had seen Michaelanglo’s painting a few times, but I actually had no idea about the rest of the Sistine Chapel art work, and I was completely in awe. I looked up so much that I got neck ache, and I couldn’t stop smiling. I didn’t take any photos there because you weren’t supposed to, and I wanted to keep the image for my mind rather than immortalising it just for the sake of having a photo.

After Sistine Chapel we went to St Peter’s Cathedral, which again was beautiful. Our airbnb host had told us ‘you must go to the top of the basilica’, which we didn’t know was an option, but for €6 (or €7 to take the elevator) you can go to the top of the dome and walk around the outside. The walk was horrible, I am not a huge fan of unsteady climbing or enclosed spaces, and it was both of those combined for 551 steps up to the top.

Once we reached the top, we had a 360 degree view of Rome, but most remarkably was St Peter’s Square, which looked amazing, even in the pissing down rain.

Whilst near Vatican City I wanted to visit a Nespresso boutique I’d found was nearby (You can take the girl out of Nespresso, but can never take the Nespresso out of the girl). It was pissing down with rain, but we walked, and walked, trying to find it. We stopped at an espresso bar on the way through to dry off, and also in an amazing department store (like Urban outfitters crossed with Ikea), and eventually came across the Nespresso Shop-In-Shop within another department store. Not the grand boutique I was hoping for, but another one crossed off the list. Afterwards we had planned to stay out and visit Trevi Fountain and Spanish Steps, but the rain had gotten to both of us quite badly so we headed back to our apartment via the metro. After grabbing some pizza from the local pizzeria next door, we decided we’d dry off and go back out to visit Trevi Fountain and the Spanish steps in the evening. It was still raining but we were still in high spirits. I wasn’t expecting much, and the Spanish Steps really weren’t anything special, especially being extremely conscious of how slippery they are to climb when it was raining so much, but they did give a great view of St Peter’s from the top.

We walked a little further towards where the Trevi Fountain was, having no idea how close we were it suddenly appeared. It was probably about 8pm and there were only a handful of people by it, but I fell in love with it, I found it really beautiful to look at. 

I didn’t want to leave the fountain, and honestly for me this felt like the most romantic part of the trip. Eventually we walked home and had an early night.

The third day was to be my last, Doctor Rome was staying for a further 2 days after I was leaving, so we decided to pack in all the things I wanted to see into the 3 days I would be there. Our airbnb was only a 10 minute walk from the colosseum so we woke early and walked over to it. Surprised by how close it really was (just a short walk through a dodgy park behind us) and it was another breathtaking sight. Tickets were cheap and we got a guided tour too. The tour took probably nearly an hour and was relatively informative, but again, I didn’t have all that much interest in it, but for only €5 I would say it’s a definite thing to buy.

Photo Credz to Doctor Rome.

After the colosseum we walked around for a little bit, and grabbed some food in another recommended restaurant. I had a dish that my housemates often make at home, so it was interesting to taste the real thing. Then walking back to the apartment we managed to find the gelato place we’d looked for on the first night. It was a vegan and gluten free gelato place, and the flavours were intense and amazing, but the consistency was a lot more liquidy than usual gelato so we had to eat them speedily. 

After walking back to the apartment we had a little bit of time to chill before we had to leave for the station. Everything was fine, but I kinda twigged that this holiday was the end of this Tinder Romance. We walked to the train station and we said goodbye and I left him to the rest of his adventure. Whilst I managed to fall asleep on the train, and arrive at the airport to find my flight was delayed by an hour and a half. Which wouldn’t have been too bad but I had a connection flight in Brussels with only a 1 hour 20 minute gap. Luckily the second flight was also delayed (it snowed in Brussels and they had to de-ice all the planes), I managed to make it back to the UK, however had missed my bargain £1 megabus by about 10 minutes so had to fork out £25 for a national express, plus £10 on a taxi home at 4am, ready to wake up for work at 10am. 

I didn’t hear from Doctor Rome (apart from telling him i arrived home and he said to have a nice day) at all, even after he would’ve arrived home. I asked him if he didn’t want to talk to me or see me, and told him it was ok but would be nice for him to tell me rather than ghost me, and that’s when I got the lousy reject text.

Better to have Tinder Romanced in Rome and Lost, than to not have Tinder Romanced In Rome at all, right?

[helyercreative]

My First Tinder Holiday

This post will come as a surprise for a variety of reasons, the first one being that last time I wrote a blog post, back in July, I was in a happy relationship that was going swimmingly well, and the second reason, is that the content of the rest of this blog is something I haven’t told my Father, for fear of judgement (he’d be right, too). 

Since becoming a single lady, in early September, I jumped on the millennial bandwagon and redownloaded Tinder. ‘Just to waste some time’ I said at first, but as anyone who’s spent hours swiping left and right, you’re aware there’s a slight addiction to it. For the first few days I was constantly swiping left (that’s ‘no’, for anyone over 40 reading this), and then wondering why no one was messaging me. I was afraid, I guess. Eventually I tinkered a little with a right swipe, and got some matches, yet didn’t message anyone myself. I didn’t have any plans to meet anyone, of course I wasn’t over my ex yet, but eventually the bright lights of ‘Fancy meeting for a drink this Friday?’ shone through, and there I was on my first ‘Tinder Date’ in over two years.

 We live in a different generation of people now. No longer are people shocked when you tell them you met your partner through a dating app or online, in fact it’s mostly met with choruses of ‘Me too’s or people’s success stories. I wasn’t even afraid to tell my Mum. It’s become a talking point with my best friend to send her the most embarrassing Tinder profiles I’ve found, or sometimes, the hottest, or the weirdest, or the obsessed guys, or the ‘isn’t he in a relationship with that girl you worked with’ guys. You see people on trains, at work, having coffee, all on Tinder. It’s become as normal as being on the Facebook app. 

Long story short, and I really don't want or need to delve into any details, but a couple of months down the line I went on a date with a lovely guy, during the Australia vs Wales rugby night, so Cardiff was packed and we had tough luck on finding any seats in any bar in Cardiff. We walked around the city getting to know each other, and eventually found a table in ‘spoons. As the night wore on, we visited Wok To Walk (that’s a tick in his favour in my book), and I said goodbye to him at the train station. Two days later, I booked a flight to Rome with him for two weeks time. 

Crazy? Yes, probably. But I haven’t stopped saying ‘YOLO’ since I booked my tickets. Anyone who knows me (and it’s safe to say most of my generation are the same), would know I love travelling, and I love a cheap deal. I’ve never been to Italy before. I’ve also never been on holiday with a complete stranger before. I figured, probably naively, what was the worst that could happen? And the best thing? I get to visit a beautiful historic city, with a lovely guy, and have an experience I would have never had if I’d stayed at home. 

I’m going to write a second blog after we’ve returned from Rome (ya know, if he doesn’t kill me or something). I’m really excited just to do something a bit different. I know people who have done worse, and as much as I can hear the sigh of my Father in my ear, I know I’ll enjoy it and I deserve to treat myself. 

[helyercreative]

365 Days

365 days ago, I graduated. 

That’s one entire year. 

A lot can be happen in a year; celebrations, heartbreak, smiles, hugs, new jobs, new friends, anger, etc. 

My reason to write this blog today, is because of an event that happened yesterday. I am losing my job. Again. For the second time in the last 365 days. Sucks, right? I wanted to let myself know how much has happened in the past year - 365 days - I had 365 chances to live my life to the fullest... 

In the past 365 days, I spent roughly 115 days unemployed.

In the past 365 days, I spent 23 days abroad. 

In the past 365 days, I have had my own car for 314 days. 

In the past 365 days, I have been an Aunty to a little girl for 27 days. 

In the past 365 days, I have spent an unnumbered amount of days sitting in the sun at Roath Park.

In the past 365 days, I have spent at least 100 days at the gym. 

In the past 365 days, I have spent not enough days hugging my Nephew. 

In the past 365 days, I have been grateful for my boyfriend for every single one of them. 

In the past 365 days, I have said ‘Oh my god look at that dog’ about a million times. 

In the past 365 days, I have seen a lot of bands live, including Blink 182 twice and Robbie Williams twice. 

In the past 365 days, I have overcome most of my anxiety. 

In the past 365 days, I have laughed every single one of them. 

In the past 365 days, I have gotten 0 new tattoos (something to finally make my Dad proud).

In the past 365 days, I have worked in 7 different jobs (four of them side by side).

In the past 365 days, I have been pescetarian for 194 days. 

Listing achievements and events by numbers can really help control the mind, and calm my brain. So yes, by next week I will have lost my first full time job since my degree. But I have achieved SO much in the past year, and I am confident that it won’t be long before I am in new employment. 

[helyercreative]

Benefits of Creative Friends

In the last few weeks, I started a part time job as a photographer in one of the local Cardiff bars. This happened by chance of simply talking to the right person at the right time, and being more than willing to try something new, and I’m really glad that I didn’t let me anxiety get in the way for once. As of writing this, I have completed three full shifts, and I three more booked in for the next week or two. It’s pretty unregular work, but I’m sure the better I perform, the more likely I am to get more shifts. 

It was one of my best friend’s birthdays this past weekend, and in her traditional style she had a themed house party with a ton of her friends. She’s done this every single year I’ve known her throughout university, and she goes all out for it, with house decorations, punches, food, and amazing fancy dress ideas. This year she chose an Alice In Wonderland theme. I figured because I was now getting back into photography and my job is to shoot events, I would use the party as some extra practice, and it would make an awesome present for my friend to have some wicked photos from her party. I guess that’s one of the benefits of having creative friends. 

Anyway, I decided to make a blog with a few of my favourite photos... 

The birthday girl with her drinking potion.

Celebrating!

Cheshire Kat

Having to relight the cake as walking it over made the candles go out.

Making her birthday wish!

And just for good measure, my friends enjoying their cake [that we all fought for].

[helyercreative]

DIY Christmas

Everyone loves receiving a thought-out Christmas gift, and especially anything with personalisation to it. One of my favourite things about being a creative person is making handmade gifts/cards for presents. So I’ve compiled a few that I’ve made in the past to inspire you for super easy ways to make hand made cards/presents/labels to add a little something special to your christmas gifts this year...

Hand-made mini screen printed Christmas Cards

A few years ago I was at home and bored, after searching pinterest for hours [/years] I found some DIY Screen Print tutorials. I made some little cards with a very quick and easily made Screen Print.

The screen was made using some thick cardboard, a pair of tights, and some sellotape. And that was it. Cut the card into a frame [of whatever size you want to make the print of], cover it with the tights, and pull as tight as you can around the frame, taping it into place. I made the stencil on tracing paper, as I didn’t have any acetate at home. I made a few different versions, and even did some reverse printing too. I used all the cards that year and the year after but I was so sad to see them go as I really liked them.

(I haven’t folded the cards the wrong way, the photo was mirrored as i took it using a webcam)

Handmade Rubber Stamp Christmas Cards

Last year I made home made Christmas cards again, by using a technique I’d recently learnt at Uni inspired by my trip to India. Although the technique is similar to one that most of you did as children - potato stamping. I had a plain rectangular eraser, and using a lino cutter [or you could just use a stanley knife, but be careful!] just simply cut out stripes of the rubber. I made an abstract tree shape stencil and stamped in the gap, to make a green stripy tree.

Super simple, does the job and each one is very unique. 

Father Christmas Labels

I found this tutorial when I was living in Australia 4 years ago, and the only photo I have shows the shabby versions of that ones I made, but I shall share anyway as I really loved making them and think they were super effective. Shop bought labels are very ill thought out, just grab ones that slightly match the wrapping paper and you write a short note inside to the present receiver, but when I was in Aus and spending my first christmas away from my entire family, including my one year old Nephew, I wanted to put my all into the gifts I was sending home. So I made these...

Excuse the terrible photo, and how shoddy they are, these were my experiments before finding card in the right colour and the easiest ways to cut everything out. 

A circle for Santa’s face, a red triangle for his hat, some white card for the white trim of his hat and a two hole punched circles for the bobble on the end, and finally fold a white piece of card in half and cut a big cloud from it, this aides as his beard and where it folds you can write a lovely message inside. Clearly from my photo I hadn’t quite figured out the sizes, shapes, alignment etc, but I can remember being extremely happy from my final pieces. 

I hope this post gives you a few easy ideas to personalise your Christmas without breaking the bank or having the buy a world’s worth of craft supplies. If anyone uses any of my ideas I’d love to see your versions of them :)

[helyercreative]

Recipe - Cauliflower-base Pizza

Pinterest Moms all over the world love this recipe, as well as anyone on a low carb diet. It’s a guilt free and home cooked alternative to the world’s favourite fast food. 

For anyone who doesn’t know, the premise of this recipe is to make a healthier option for pizza. You can put all the same toppings on as you’d normally have on any pizza, but this is a carb free dish, and gives you a HUGE portion of cauliflower which obviously adds into your five-a-day.

The idea and method of this pizza base is simple and easy, although quite time consuming, so make sure you have enough time to make it.

Ingredients to make one small pizza, probably suitable for one person:

One head of cauliflower

Two eggs

Seasonings (I used salt, Pepper, Herbs and Chilli flakes)

Grated mozzarella (I used cheddar as it’s what I had but Mozzarella works better)

Any toppings you want on the top, a favourite of mine is tomato paste, feta cheese caramelised red onions, and mushrooms.

A pizza tray or baking tray... or roasting tin... anything big and flat...

Method:

- Preheat oven to gas mark 8 or equivalent.

- Cut the florets of the cauliflower off of the head, this alone can be quite messy as bits tend to fly off everywhere. 

- Put the florets into a blender. Blend until is resembles cous cous. 

- Transfer blitzed cauliflower into a heat proof bowl and put in your microwave for five minutes on the highest setting. Once done, take out and flip the bowl onto a clean tea towel (the less textured the better), leave to air cool for a while. (Very important step as you’d be surprised how hot cauliflower water can get…)

- Gather your tea towel by the corners, with cauliflower inside once cooled and over the sink squeeze out as much liquid as humanly possible. I tend to do this in three or four attempts as it still stays quite hot and you can move the veg around to get the moist bits easier to squeeze. Squeeze until you feel like you can’t go anymore. 

- Once you’ve gotten as much liquid out as possible, put the cauliflower - minus the tea towel - back into the bowl, and all the eggs, a large amount of grated cheese (maybe a cup full? but I don’t think it’s super important…) and your seasonings. Mix it all together until it resembles more of a dough, and then spread this into a pizza tray or baking tray. It’s best to line it with some baking paper, for a non stick and easy way to remove the cooked pizza.

- Pop the base into your preheated oven for about twenty minutes and keep checking it after as you just want it a little brown on top.

- Once the base has browned up a bit, remove it from the oven and put your toppings on. Then simply as you would with a normal pizza, place it back into the oven until the toppings have cooked or the cheese has melted to your desire.

- When your pizza is done it may be a little hard to remove off the tray. Cauliflower bases don’t cook as hard as a bread dough, so the baking paper works great to slide it onto a plate. If you’ve cooked it for long enough it should be just about hard enough to hold it’s own if you lift a bit up, this will also be apparent depending on how much liquid you managed to remove.

It honestly does taste different to normal pizza, I won’t lie. But it’s a super healthy alternative and if you’re on a low carb diet for any health or fitness reasons it’s a great way to enjoy a guilt free pizza.

[helyercreative]

Travel - Berlin

As almost any ‘X Generation’ teen/young adult would tell you, I love to travel. I mean, who doesn’t? I don’t like to brag, but I’ve seen a fair few places, I’m sure I’ll get around to blogging about them in good time. In September I went to Berlin for a short 4 day city break with my bestie, Hannah.

(Outside Berliner Dom - Berlin Cathedral)

I have a weird fascination for Germany, having been taught German from age 13 til 16 at school and always wanting to visit. I managed to visit for the first time in my first year of Uni when I was 20, so I had a long wait. I loved it so much, despite it being -8 degrees (never visit in winter if you’re from a country that only gets to 3 degrees at it’s lowest daytime temperature). I vowed to visit again in the summer so I could truly see it for what it is, and Hannah and I decided this summer would be the perfect time. Hannah recently moved from Cardiff back to her hometown of Nottingham, so this was sort of a goodbye holiday now that we no longer live together. We wanted to keep it pretty cheap and cheerful, and that we did.

Travel

For us living in Cardiff, we had a few options on how to get to Berlin. Our cheapest option was flying from Bristol, which luckily is only an hour away from us. We got a National Express coach to Bristol (Hannah had a 2 for 1 voucher which came at the perfect time), and flew with Easy Jet to Schöneberg Flughafen (Airport) in Berlin. Once we got to the airport we just walked over to the Bahnhof (train station) and got an S-bahn to our hostel, it took about 30-40 minutes but it was one straight train so it was super simple. For travel around the city, we actually walked everywhere every single day, which involved A LOT of walking as Berlin is massive. On one day we managed to walk over 30,000 steps!

Accommodation

As we wanted to keep the trip pretty cheap we decided to stay in a hostel, also gives the added benefit of meeting a lot of other people from around the world and also a great place to ask for help on directions or advice on where to visit. The first time I stayed in Berlin I stayed in a brilliant hostel from the Generator chain, which was in Berlin Mitte and very central to the city centre. That hostel was quite pricey, but there is another Generator in Berlin which is super cheap, about £12 a night. However was sadly fully booked for the days we were travelling. We managed to find another hostel that was only £2 a night extra called Lett’em Sleep in Prenzlauer Allee. Although it was a little out of the way of the rush of Berlin (situated in the North Eastern side of Berlin) it was in a very nice area and there was still plenty of eateries and shopping and bars all around us. We stayed in a 7 bed room, which was full of girls when we got there, and full of boys by the time we left. There was an old lady who refused to speak to any of us, and two european girls who we didn’t get much chance to speak to apart from lending her my shampoo. Two British girls who were super lovely and we had a lot to talk about with. And one of the boys was a Columbian guy named Diago who we hung out with for an entire night. The hostel was really nice and had a small kitchen that you could use and leave food there, which was also the common room. Only main issue is that the WiFi only connected in the common room and wouldn’t stretch to our hostel room. But other than that I’d definitely recommend Lett’em Sleep and would stay there again too.

(Lovely sunrise near our Hostel)

Attractions

Obviously Berlin has a lot to see and do given the historical nature of the place. Although I’d seen most of the historical stuff on my previous trip, Hannah hadn’t and I was more than happy to see it all again. Most famously would be Brandenburg Tor/Gate, The Jewish memorial, and obviously the Berlin Wall. We managed to see all these things although missed the Jewish Memorial the first time we were in the area, and got lost finding the Berlin Wall memorial and had to go aaaaaall the way back to find it again. There are plenty of museums of both history and art, some of which are free, or you can buy a museum pass which lets you into however many museums over a period of a few days. We also visited Berlin Dom/Cathedral, it’s right on the river and it’s a beautiful building even without going inside.

(One of the most famous artworks at the East Side Gallery on the Berlin Wall)

(I work for Nespresso in the UK, so I HAD to visit Berlin’s Nespresso boutique!)

Berlin is a place that I would definitely go back to, over and over again, and also even consider moving there, as there is a great creative scene so being a graphic designer that works in my favour quite well. Also, despite the fact I can speak a small amount of German, there’s no need as everyone can speak extremely good English (even though they’ll only tell you they only speak ‘a little’). I have yet to visit any other parts of Germany, however my Boyfriend was in Munich just two or three weeks before I visited Berlin. I think people underrate how good Europe is to visit, and a city break too. Personally I prefer visiting a city rather than a beach, I feel like you get a more realistic taste of a country rather than simply being a tourist. Berlin is super cheap too, aside from the hostel I probably only spent about €70 total. So if you need a break from the UK, it’s definitely the place to go, especially for the Currywurst alone!

[helyercreative]

Mental Health - Anxiety

-Disclaimer: This is going to be a very long post, but if it helps even one person then that makes me so happy-

Small secret for anyone who doesn’t know me, is that I suffer from anxiety. I mean, really, it’s not a secret. I like to tell people, to spread awareness, and to help people understand that I’m not being rude, I’m just anxious. It strikes me in different ways, sometimes I flourish in a situation, but sometimes I get so anxious that I’m on the verge of tears and can’t even speak to anyone. My main reason for this blog is for anyone who’s just started or is at university or in education because I feel that mental health in these times is critical on your studies, your relationships and your overall happiness.

When I was in my second year of university, I went on a trip to India. Which of course, is an amazing experience and opportunity. India is one of the most beautiful places I’ve been, and yet when people ask me about my time there I can’t helped but answer with ‘eh, it was ok, I guess’. I’ve always - unknowingly - suffered with anxiety, but being in India was the saviour for me as it made my anxiety so bad that I had no choice but to acknowledge it and do something about it.

(Me - on the furthest right - with all the people I went to India with)

I honestly had no idea that I had anxiety before this trip. I just thought I was maybe shy, or introverted. No one had ever explained to me what being anxious really meant, or why I didn’t like doing certain things, I thought I was just lazy because I didn’t want to go to the shop alone. I can’t remember ever not having anxious traits, but I’ve just had them so long that they’re a part of my personality, and so that’s why they never bothered me so much to research it or do anything about it. India truly changed that. Whilst it is a lovely country, and Indian people are incredible. It is, however, one of the most populated countries in the world and as a white person in a country like that a lot of attention comes towards us. Indians are very curious beings and staring is not considered rude or awkward in their culture, so a lot of people stared at us white people, a lot of people wanted to help us and if we were looking for a taxi there would be a crowd of 10 taxi drivers plus their friends all trying to get us to the right place. Which is not a bad thing at all. Something about all this attention and all the people in India and everything made my anxiety so intense that when I returned to the UK, the only times I could leave the house alone were to go to university (the bus stop was right outside my house) or to walk to my now-exboyfriend’s house which was a mile or so away, where he also had a bus stop right outside his house.

It got to the point where I couldn’t walk the 5 minutes to Tesco to do my weekly shop, unless someone was coming with me. I just physically felt upset and horrible at the idea of leaving the house alone, or going to a shop. When I did go to the shop with my friend, I’d stick by my friend so much that I wouldn’t even buy my shopping because unless they were going down the same aisle, I wouldn’t go down it, and I’d forfeit my own wants and needs for the sake of not being alone for 5 seconds. If I was at university I wouldn’t go anywhere without someone, I couldn’t eat lunch on my own, I couldn’t go and buy lunch without someone. It got to the point where it really started affecting my studies because I refused to go to the library alone, or go to the print room or ask for help, basically. And that’s how I got found out.

About 2 weeks or so after we’d arrived home from India, we were supposed to have a group tutorial with the head of my course, Olwen. For some reason the other people in my group decided not to show up, so it ended up being a one-to-one tutorial with just me and Olwen, and I hate to think what would’ve happened if someone did show up because if it wasn’t for this meeting my anxiety would have just gotten worse and worse. After a long talk of explaining to Olwen why I hadn’t done any work (I think my ideas were to do with another department which of course involved going into unfamiliar territory etc etc) Olwen crept a bit further into questioning things, and long story short, I became a crying mess on the sofa because I finally realised there was something that wasn’t normal happening to me. There and then Olwen made me phone my doctor to book an appointment, and she also took me to the Student Services part of our university and got me signed up to counselling sessions. I implore anyone in education that is reading this that if you have ANY issues, be it mental health, problems at home, you think you might be gay and you’re scared, anything, PLEASE visit your student services. Sadly there was an extremely long waiting list for me to start my counselling sessions. So I signed up in December, and didn’t start my sessions until sometime in February.

Now, as much as I would advise going to student services and seeking help and even speaking to anybody (props to my housemate at the time Dan, who tried his very best to understand and even encouraged me with everything i did in regards to seeking help), that doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone. I would still recommend to anyone to go to counselling if they needed it, but personally for me I felt like it made everything worse. Please don’t let that put you off. I personally think because I had hidden my anxiety for so long, I had never ever considered what made me the way I was. I THINK I had CBT therapy which basically tries to turn your brain into a computer and helps you understand things a certain way (I don’t know?!), but I personally hated it. I had 6 weeks of sessions, although the last ones were split across a fortnight because I was getting so emotionally drained from them that my counsellor decided it would be better to have a longer gap between them, oh also because it would have been my birthday and I didn’t want one on my birthday. Since I finished counselling, for a very short while my anxiety stayed pretty bad, but because of counselling I finally could acknowledge why I thought in the way I did, or how things may effect me, which was a very good thing that I wouldn’t have learnt without the sessions.

I’m now about a year and 7 months since I finished counselling and I have never been so anxiety free in my life. There are many reasons why I feel so much better, and I think a lot of it is down to the understanding - through counselling - of what makes me anxious. I can learn to say no if I know a situation will make me anxious, and I did learn a few coping mechanisms to use for when I’m feeling anxious (One is basically the schrodinger’s cat of anxiety... if I don’t know for sure what the person is thinking, I can’t say for definite that they’re judging me... so I may as well just assume that they’re not). I managed to graduate from university, I have a successful job, a successful relationship and can confidently go food shopping on my own without even a moment’s thought (however clothes shopping or going into the city centre alone is still a big issue for me).

(Some of my closet friends - I’m the short one at the back - after my anxiety started to calm down a bit)

When I tell people I suffer from anxiety, I am mostly met with ‘oh but you’re so confident’ or ‘you don’t seem anxious’, so mostly I’d like this post to be a reminder that it can be very easy to hide mental health, whether that’s anxiety or depression or bi-polar disorder or many other things, please never assume that people think in the same way that you do. If you have a friend who you know has anxiety, please never force them to do something because you think it will fix them. A gentle push can sometimes be ok, but you must be forgiving if it doesn’t work out. My boyfriend is pretty good at getting the balance right most of the time, but sometimes he gets confused how I can be so anxious at such little things (once he left me in the doorway of a shop because it was pissing down with rain and we couldn’t find the restaurant we were looking for, so he asked me to wait in the doorway whilst he ran down the street to find it and I got so anxious at the idea of being left alone that I was nearly crying and he just didn’t get it. We can laugh about it now, but at the time it wasn’t great on either of our sides). Sometimes all someone needs is the company. They don’t have to be talking, or touching, even just walking alongside someone makes my anxiety mostly go away, and I’d always rather someone ask me to see what works best rather than assume it was the same as a previous occasion, because anxiety never works in the same way twice.

[helyercreative]

Book Review - Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

One of my favourite things is when someone says ‘this reminded me of you’ or ‘I saw this and thought you’d really like it’, I’m sure this has happened to most people. My old housemate and one of my best friends, Hannah, told me about a book called Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff, by Richard Carlson, as it reminded her of me and she felt I’d benefit a lot by reading it. 

She let me borrow her copy a while ago, but it took me an extortionate amount of time to read. I often don’t read in my downtime, and usually only find the time when I’m travelling via train or other long journeys where I’m a passenger. I think in total it took me 3 months to read this quite short, yet insightful book.

As a person who has suffered quite extreme anxiety, and still suffers from mild anxiety now, this book was a perfect reminder to relax, take some time, and think before getting too worked up about things.

Each chapter is between 2 and 4 pages long. Which makes it super quick and easy to read, and also great if you just need to remind yourself to relax you can open at nearly any page and read one short chapter to centre your thoughts.

The general gist of the book, I’m sure you can figure out, is basically not to worry about little things and let them build up into bigs things. My favourite chapter title was ‘When in doubt about whose turn it is to take out the trash, go ahead and take it out’. I was made fun of in all the houseshares I’ve lived in because I was obsessed with putting the bins out, and if no one did it I would complain, but then just do it myself anyway because I knew if I did it then it would be done, but if I didn’t I’d spend the evening worrying about having them pile up because no one took them out. What a silly thing to be worrying about, really!

Hannah recently got herself a second copy of the book and gifted me her other one permanently, which is super nice. Her parents live by the rules of the book, and I can’t wait to share it with more people, because it really makes you think how silly you’re being when you get annoyed in traffic, or something tiny goes wrong, or you’re not making enough time for yourself. It has some great and simple life tips!

I’d recommend this book to anyone who enjoys ‘self help’ books, or anyone wanting a light read. Also it’s especially great if you’re feeling a little down in life or at a cross roads and want something to uplift and motive you. 

[helyercreative]

Recipe - Homemade Ramen

I LOVE Asian food, especially Japanese food... I mean, in reality, just food. I love food. There, I said it. I recently made my very first ever roast dinner, at the ripe old age of 23. I’d been eyeing up the chickens in Tesco and realised how much cheaper it would be to buy a whole chicken than to buy a pack of chicken breast each meal. I vowed to use as much of the chicken as possible to make it worthwhile, because I hate food waste, and also I’m super tight with my money and like to get the most out of things. So I made the roast chicken for me and my boyfriend, with extra helpings, had two chicken sandwiches from it, gave my boyfriend an entire - large - portion of chicken which he made into a meal for us, so from the meat alone I got essentially six meals from it, which is amazing as the chicken itself only cost me £3.40! 

However, on top of that, I decided to make a homemade chicken stock. I don’t think my life has ever even called for use of any type of stock that doesn’t come in a silver cubed packet with a beautiful symmetrically decorated box, but when I was in my first year of university, one of my flatmates’ girlfriend would make a chicken noodle soup from the stock of a chicken, and I’ve always wanted to make one for myself. To cut a long story short, the noodle soup didn’t go to plan, however I did make a lovely stock.

If you’ve never made a chicken stock, you’re missing out. It’s a simple yet long task that ensures you’re getting the most out of your meat. I’ve only made chicken stock twice, but I can assume you can make stock from other meat carcusses (carcussi?) too. The main gist is to take off us much meat as you can muster (and then use it for a curry or some other godly meat meal), so you’re left with primarily just the bones. Chuck it in the largest saucepan or cooking pot you can find. You could make a straight stock with purely just chicken flavouring, but where’s the fun in that? Add those spices, herbs, vegetables etc. The great thing about stock is you’re only gunna be using the liquid, so if you have any veggies on their way off, chuck them in [as long as there’s no mould growing on them], because the flavours still good. You don’t even have to fully skin your garlic bulb, it’s basically cooking for lazy people (aka, me). Once it’s all in your pot, cover it with water, and leave it to gently simmer for basically anywhere over an hour. I think 3 hours is pretty much the average recommended time, but an hour would work fine if you’re running short on time or patience. The hardest bit is really at the end. You now have to take out all the inedible bits like bones or skin, any veggies you don’t want. You could leave the veggies in and blend it if you were to make a soup, but I just used mine for flavouring so I took them all out. Decant all the liquid stock into containers, cool down, and freeze for when you want them. 

Onto the ramen... I’d never considered cooking a ramen noodle soup before. I’ve probably only eaten it about once, but my Mum gave me some udon noodles that my cousin had bought and didn’t enjoy, as she knew I loved udon noodles (it’s true, I do I do I do-ooh). I didn’t know what to cook them with, and i also didn’t know when I could use the chicken stock. I remembered that I’d added some chilis into my stock, so figured it would be spicy enough to make a Japanese noodle soup with. So I boiled the soup in a saucepan, with the noodles in for two minutes until cooked. In a separate saucepan I heated coconut oil, chopped garlic, chopped chicken, some homegrown tomatoes from my Mum and some kale. For any easy meal, kale and tomatoes on the hob with some oil works wonders, especially with cous cous. Once the meat and veggies were all cooked, I simply just added them into the noodle pan and heated them all together, before serving them in a bowl. 

For something so last minute and something I’d never cooked before, I was thoroughly impressed. It’s definitely going to be a staple in my diet, for whenever I make a roast chicken again. The great thing is you can add any type of veggies (to the stock, as well as in the ramen) so there’s really nothing holding you back from making it. 

[helyercreative]

Street Food Circus

Two things I love - Great Food, and Events in Cardiff. 

Anyone who’s spent any kind of time in Cardiff, is surely aware of all the amazing free [or sometimes not free] events the city has to offer. These events range from The Cardiff Cider Festival (September 22nd - 24th) , Swn Festival (21st - 23rd October), the Quentin Blake exhibition at the National Museum of Wales (runs until November 20th), Simple Knots Craft Club (Every first Thursday of the month at Little Man Coffee Co.), I could name a lot more, but the one I want to introduce to you today is the amazing Street Food Circus.

I first came across the SFC last summer, when it was held next to NoFitState Circus. I’m not sure that it being held by a circus had any relevance to the name, or if they held it there because of the name, but it worked. I visited last year with my friend Ben, because I was obsessed with a Chinese food company named Hokkei [who are sadly no longer around], who had a stall at the 2015 SFC. As it turned out I didn’t even eat from Hokkei, instead opting for a lobster roll from Burger & Lobster [also, no longer in Cardiff anymore], and some Churros from a Mexican stand. I really enjoyed the atmosphere, and of course all the wonderful types of food, so this year when my friend Dwida invited me to go with her, I didn’t hesitate to say yes. 

Street Food Circus 2016 runs every Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday afternoon through to evening, every weekend throughout August and September at Sophia Gardens. Myself, Dwida, and my other friend Yaz all went together on a Saturday early evening. It was pretty busy despite not even being peak time yet. 

There are so many different cuisines on offer at SFC, and I’m pretty sure they’re all companies who are based in or near Cardiff too, so it’s a really great way to have a taster of somewhere before you go for there a full meal. The circus is a cash only venue, with each meal ranging from about £5 - £8. There are offerings of savoury and sweet foods from around the globe, as well as a huge beer tent with local ales and ciders to buy, too. 

The decoration of the circus is beautiful too, and really sets the mood, despite the sometimes unfortunate British weather. There was one corner that had a lot of Asian food places, and it really felt like little-India with the beautiful bright colours and the wonderful smells. 

Both of my friends opted for the same dish from a Thai stand. It sounded gorgeous, although I annoyingly now can’t remember what it was... but essentially like an Asian burrito with sticky beef and a roti or paratha instead of a tortilla. Right up my street, but I couldn’t say no to a company called ‘Little Bao Peep’, because the name is punny and I never got to try a Bao at Hockey’s stand last year so I thought I could make up for it this year by having one from them.

For anyone who doesn’t know what a Bao is (pronounced like ‘bow’, the thing a man does when he meets the Queen, not a cute decorative ribbon for your hair), it’s a Chinese steamed bun. The bun itself has a beautiful silky smooth doughy texture, and the fillings are usually some kind of deliciously sauce and sticky slow roasted meat and spring greens. The Bao on offer (there was only one) caught my eye because it just sounded so ridiculous. You know when Heston Blumenthal makes a ‘normal’ food super pretentious by adding a sauce that was sucked out of a unicorn horn, when he could’ve just bought the same thing from Tesco? It’s the same kind of thing. But I felt like it was the kind of time I could be pretentious with my food and not care.

Doesn’t it look beautiful? Now I bet you’re wondering what makes it so pretentious/ridiculous...

Pork Bao. That’s fine, that’s normal. 

Red pulled pork (I didn’t know pork could be any other colour other than brown, but okay), pickled cucumber (never heard of that, but also I’ve never been to China, so it could be a thing), hoisin sauce (well, what’s a Chinese dish without it? tick!), topped with a peanut & oreo powder and served with a side salad (normal, right?). Oh, did you miss that? PEANUT AND OREO POWDER! On a pork bun. Yes. Really. 

So yes, I thought it could be a bit weird. And honestly I was so concerned about the oreo powder that I didn’t even realise I don’t like peanuts on food until i’d already started eating it. The oreo flavour tasted perfect with the pork and hoisin sauce, if anything the peanuts were the only bit that threw the flavour off. So there we have it, you can now officially add biscuits to meaty foods. It saves time on ordering a separate dessert. 

I’m off to watch Bake Off with a custard cream and ham sandwich.

Ruby xo