Hesper Gamp

25. Female. Witch. Wife to Mr Sirius Black. Mother to Arcturus and Lycoris Black.

[hespergamp]

i n t r o d u c t i o n ;

Muse:

Name: Hesper Gamp

Nickname(s): Ha. No don't try that with her. Birthday: 23rd October 1893 - 25 years old. Relationship Status: tbd with Possibly Busy Killing, but she had been (unhappily) married to Sirius Black  Random fact: She has perfected the evil eye.

Mun:

Name: Sofia Tumblr URL: targharyen.tumblr.com Nickname(s): Sof, sofa, honestly anything i don't mind :)  Relationship Status: Single Random fact about you:  I'm embarrassingly clumsy. 

[darkpureblood]

♚ Hesper Gamp

♚ 25 years old / Wizard / Pureblood

♚ FC: Sophia Bush [more]

As a descendant of the wizard that declared the Law of Elemental Transfiguration, Hesper was hardly a no-name face before she married Sirius. While Sirius is constantly in the spotlight, Hesper does not seem affected by the attention she receives in public. Since the start of their arranged marriage, an air of mystery has surrounded the couple. They are rarely seen in public together, other than their joined attendance to society events. During her pregnancy, it was rumored that she never left the house. Will Hesper remain distant from everyone for the rest of her life? 

SECRETS: 

Forced to marry Sirius II. She slept in a separate bed than him for nearly a year before she allowed him to get intimate to her.

Attended Beauxbatons Academy of Magic and does not care about Hogwarts.

Relationship with Phineas has always been tense.

The Black Family does not know that she is an Animagus.

SHIPS: Married to Sirius Black II.

ENDGAME: She’s already married, so this is irrelevant, but you can decide how open their marriage is with the Sirius roleplayer.

HESPER GAMP IS TAKEN

PLOT ♚ RULES ♚ ROLES ♚ APPLY ♚ QUESTIONS

[phineasablack]

July 1904 | A Casual Stroll | Phineas & Hesper

Two weeks had passed since the unfortunate incident with Sirius, and still Phineas found it difficult to be home with Josiah. He had apologized profusely for Phineas’ discomfort, his indiscretion, and the fight that had resulted from the whole ordeal. Phineas had accepted, of course, and told him not to concern himself—the fight was certainly not his fault, and as an adult, Josiah hardly required Phineas’ permission—but he still could not manage to feel settled in his own home.

His nights had been spent sleeplessly, agonizing alternately over telling Hesper of her husband’s infidelity and over feeling inferior to Sirius for the simple fact that Josiah had never wanted him. And then there was the distinct image of Josiah on the floor, petrified and spread-eagle, burned into his mind.

In an attempt to once again avoid home, Phineas Apparated to a nearby park for a mid-afternoon walk. Perhaps and excursion on the continent, or somewhere in Asia, but such excursions required focus he currently lacked. No, an aimless stroll would be enough to distract him for an hour from his thoughts.

A mere 10 minutes had passed before he spotted his sister-in-law on the path ahead, herself also unaccompanied. Strange for a woman of her status, but then again Hesper Gamp was never one for convention. Unless it suited her.

“Hesper,” he called once he was closer to her. She turned at the name and relaxed upon realizing who was speaking. “Sister, how beautiful you look today. I’m finding you well, I trust?”

[hespergamp]

It was a glorious day- the sun was shining brightly, it was a few degrees above mild and there was a light breeze that cooled her skin. Sirius was at Valhalla, which meant wandering around the grounds would not be guaranteed to be alone. At times like this, when Hesper needed to get out to appreciate the finest of the day, she often strolled through her favourite park - not far away from Valhalla, quiet and intimate enough to rid exposure from those she may not want to converse or interact with. It was an unspoken rule that only those whom were noble and well-to-do had the privilege of using the park.

She had only been there perhaps several moments or so before she heard her name, and turned to see Phineas a small distance away- what a pleasure. Although she had wanted some time alone to think, Hesper suddenly felt a wave of comfort knowing with Phineas by her side, there would not be the risk of nosy onlookers gossiping about her decision to stroll alone. She brought a hand above her eyes, to shield them from the sun so she could get a proper glimpse of him. "Mr. Black?"

"Phineas." She smiled as she waited patiently for him to come to speaking distance, clasping her hands together. Hesper tilted her head to the side, enthused by his compliment and his delightful pet name. "Very well, I hope this is the same for you also. I'm afraid it has been so long since I last had the pleasure to speak to you, I'm not sure how life has been treating you." 

"I shall tell you that I'm not one to believe in coincidences, but Sirius and I were speaking of you not long ago. How odd that I should come across you here- it is a first." 

[hespergamp]

Rekindle for the Kids ¦¦ Sirius & Hesper

[siriusthefirst]

Sirius gaped.

It was a rare and glorious thing, when Hesper became angry, expressed herself so. He could not help but thrill to it; her reddening cheeks, her quickening tongue. He wanted to seize her by the arms, and ask; where did this wild woman go, when Hesper calmed?

He glanced at Arcturus. Perhaps his son was more like him than he knew; the child looked delighted, hearing his mother so haughty. He lifted a pea from his plate and tucked it into his mouth, and Sirius, suppressing a smile, made no move to encourage him to use his fork like a man.

He met Hesper’s eyes. She looked almost apologetic, and it was enough to tear Sirius’s heart in two again. He smiled at his son, because he didn’t want to see that terrible combination of revulsion and shame in Hesper’s eyes again. “Your mother is very clever, Arc,” he said, as he took a sip of wine. “And I am pleased to hear her disdain for muggle methods.” Still, he couldn’t help but wonder; he had delved into muggle methods to learn the intricacies of anatomy; perhaps there were other secrets to be learned.

But there blood was not magical. Sirius had tasted it, hoping for some spark of something, and there was nothing.

If the Tugwood woman was using muggle methods to keep the ageing process at bay, then she may know of ingredients, potions, techniques not known to wizards. Muggles might be inferior in every way; it did not mean they did not have their uses. And a potion which kept the visible signs of ageing away might hold secrets to true immortality.

Perhaps it was a stretch. But Sirius had sworn at the outset that he would leave no stone unturned, on his quest, and he would not. He needed to have a conversation with her. “All these women, owning businesses. It’s quite unbecoming. Have they no marriage prospects?” Sure Hesper would know. Hesper knew everything. “I cannot help but wonder what sort of a woman chooses work, particularly that sort of work – potions, broom-making, work with one’s hands – over mar-…” Sirius faltered. “Over a family. I am very pleased that you have never shown such inclinations.” Of course, women from lower families worked. They were nurses and schoolteachers, though, and often only until they were married. It simply wasn’t done.

Sirius took another forkful of the rich meat. “I saw Phineas and Arcturus. We had a drink together, in Hogsmeade. Tell me, my dear; why do you think Phineas has not married?”

[hespergamp]

"Disdain is an understatement. If I so much as approved of muggle methods, then it would surely be a sign of insanity." Sirius's need to compliment her on such a thing annoyed her. It was almost as if he dreaded she had approved of such methods, and had complimented her out of relief.

Perhaps it was the tone of his voice, but Sirius's words irked her something terrible. It was true that the number of women workers was rising steadily, and usually Hesper would have thought it was a shame so many women were striving to be more like men than mothers.  But ever since her meeting with Ms. Boothby, a fantasy had been growing inside her mind - it was one where Hesper was in the shoes of Ms. Boothby's; unwed and relying financially on solely the produce of her own work. It was a strange thing, as Hesper would never want to swap her life as a mother to a business woman but the thought of having no ties to Sirius was liberating. There was, perhaps a small part of her that was envious of Ms. Boothby. 

Hesper smiled at the mention of Phineas; she was rather fond of the gentleman - always nothing but polite and courteous to her. "Oh, Phineas. Why he isn't wed is a mystery. You know your brother better than I, Sirius. He must have had interest from potential wives- he must be rich with choice.  Has he had no interest? Sirius, it was be an awful thing for Phineas to go without children. Our Arcturus would love cousins too, wouldn't you?"

She stirred in her seat, uncomfortable.  Perhaps Sirius had told Phineas how unsatisfactory his marriage was with her and it had frightened him off of marriage? Be it, it was complete fact, but Hesper would have hated to be the reason for Phineas delaying a possible love between his future wife. Just because that hadn't been the case for Sirius and herself, didn't mean it had to be the case for him.

"Both Phineas and..." She hesitated, thinking of the quarrel they had last meeting. "Mr. Malfoy are very alike - men yet to marry. Merlin forbid they made a pact to stay unwed when they were younger." Hesper jested lightly - of course no one, especially men of both their standing, would make a pact of that sort.  

[hespergamp]

The Secret of Beauty ¦¦ Sacharissa & Hesper

[sacharissatugwood-blog]

"Yes, muggles" Sacharissa remarked confidently. Mrs Black's gasp quite amused her, but she tried to keep her face frozen, without any facial expression, which however did not worked so well, for she still had a little grin on her face.

Actually, she was also surprised with Mrs Black's reaction. Even though she and her husband supports Muggles and Wizards co-existence, which was obvious to be a complete lie, Mrs Black commented with composure, much more composure than Sacharissa attributed to her response about her using with also Muggle technique.

"Muggles do not have a more powerful system than us," she replied with a nod. Of course, Muggles are not as powerful as wizards. Muggles can be smart or useful, but without magic- they won't really be equal to the wizards. "But I found their methods quite.. Interesting. It is nice to see how the two systems mix with each other" a remark that made a little hinting to the Muggles-Wizards co-existence.

Mrs Black's face was without a nod (just like Sacharissa tried to keep her face before), but her voice was nice and smooth. It definitely went better than expected, and she started to doubt in her theory that the Black's support in the new co-existence is a lie. Perhaps she was wrong, and Mrs Black truly wouldn't mind her also using Muggle systems?

As Mrs Black started questioning her about the ingredients of her product, she replied: "I think you have been a bit confused, Mrs Black; the main ingredients are magical nonetheless, but the techniques I use for the brewing if the potion are mostly invented by Muggles" she smirked, and continued, "I'm sure you will keep it a secret. I use the leafs of the elder trees, lovage and Chinese whomping cabbage" she lied, "those are the main ingredients, I believe. The rest are not that crucial". She did not thought Mrs Black will tell anyone, but she did not allow herself to take any risks.

[hespergamp]

"Hmm." Hesper sounded pleasantly, despite being even more dissatisfied. Though she was reassured to hear Tugwood wasn't so deluded to believe muggles did have a more powerful system than the wizarding world, it still was incomprehensible and unforgivable that she used anything muggle related in her potions - potions she would go on to sell to pureblood clients like herself.

She fingered at her engagement ring so the diamond was in line, giving herself something to stare at - if Hesper had to look at Tugwood's face again, her temper would flare at the idiocy of the woman. Tugwood thought she was stupid? She thought The Hesper Gamp wouldn't know such ingredients she'd just named were nothing but elements of simpler potions, and in no way possible of being a part of such a complex one as a youth potion? How insulting. She smiled falsely - but of course, convincingly- and spoke so softly that her words sounded innocent and sincere. "Co-habitation of muggles and magical kind in any sense is truly a beautiful thing. I trust you know your secret will be safe with me."

Her inch heels clicked on the wooden floorboards as Hesper waltzed around the shop once more, lazily turning her head towards the shelves as if she were still pondering on what to buy. Little did Tugwood know that there wasn't a snowball's chance in hell that Hesper would buy something here again after learning what she had today. After a dramatic sigh in resignation, Hesper turned acutely on the spot to speak to Tugwood again.

Despite the horrific ordeal of a visit, Hesper couldn't have Tugwood think she had made an enemy, let alone it be Hesper. It wouldn't do any good if things like that came out in Vanity Witch, especially since Tugwood now had knowledge that Hesper had even considered buying a youth potion. Once again, she smiled sweetly at the woman, before leaving the shop.  "I don't think anything here will be of any use to me today. Good day, Ms. Tugwood." 

[hespergamp]

Rekindle for the Kids ¦¦ Sirius & Hesper

[siriusthefirst]

Sirius had been increasingly irritated, over the days that followed, and had fully planned to approach Hesper in the parlour, and insist that she think of it as a meal with her beloved son, rather than one with her loathed husband, when finally she announced that their little family dinner party would be held at last.

Sirius wore a favourite suit – light, for the summer, but very sharp, a light grey. Intended to reflect how pleased he was to be having dinner with his wife and son, that it was a pleasure, and not a duty. Probably, he was overthinking things. But Sirius found himself tired, of late. Exhausted, even, at the constant, low-grade battle with Hesper. Tired of his own passivity, as well. He was so determined to maintain the façade that he was slowly vanishing.

It made him want to go into London and find someone to dissect. With his hands slick with blood, Sirius always felt more settled into his skin. He needed to consider his priorities; had spent too many afternoons conversing with the wizarding war’s greatest bores on the importance of good relations with the goblins, and not enough further his agenda for immortality.

A situation that needed to be rectified as soon as was practical.

Sirius listened to Hesper’s chattering for a moment, and then, with a mild smile, he disagreed. “As it happens, my business dealings are almost done with, for the summer. I’m quite looking forward to seeing a little more of you all.” He tipped his head towards Arcturus, whose chubby little fingers were wrapped around a fork. He looked very dapper; his mother had been sure to make it a special occasion for him. “Perhaps I shall take little Arc for a spot of morning tea in London this week. Lycoris is too young for such an outing, but I think you and I will have a grand time. Won’t we, Arc?” His son smiled, delighted.

One of the abhorrent elves served everyone in turn. The meat was tender, just barely pink in the middle, and the gravy was rich. The green beans, corn and Brussels sprouts swam in butter, and Sirius smiled, as Arc placed a few kernels of corn on the fork, before putting the fork in his mouth proudly. “Like me,” he said. “Look.” Sirius demonstrated correct use of the fork, and Arcturus tried again.

Sirius was beginning to feel concern about the number of women running their own businesses – it was unbecoming, and unnecessary, though he was impressed with the Tugwood woman, somewhat. A skill at potions always caught Sirius’s attention – it was an exact art, and a subtle science, and excelling in potions generally meant the witch or wizard had other traits Sirius admired as well.

Still, she had no business now.

“Is she as talented a potions-maker as they say? Not that it matters, now,” Sirius mused. “Still. What are her more noted products? I did rather well in potions myself, in school. I enjoyed the discipline. Rare to see the sort of discipline required for excellence, in a woman. You are so temperamental. I mean no disrespect, of course, but I don’t doubt you would agree. These potato galletes are delicious. Is the cheese a gruyere?”

[hespergamp]

"I'm certain Arcturus will be more than delighted to spend time with his father. Especially for morning tea." Hesper watched Arcturus grinning at Sirius. A twinge of jealousy hit her.

She was mildly surprised at Sirius tolerance. Matters of a woman's make up boutique was surely the least of his interests and it was not a subject she would use to converse with him. But her recent visit to Tugwood had left her furious and she had not had the chance to expel it off her chest.

"She made a charming lipstick." She unfolded another napkin and placed it over the pea-covered Arcturus, trying to hold in her anger. Being overly expressive (like the last disastrous dinner) was not a thing Arcturus should see. "Usually I am more than satisfied with all her products, but I did come across a youth potion of sorts in her store. What cheek! Trying to fool women into believing it would work is such a sinful thing to do. There hasn't been one youth potion to have ever worked and it bad enough con-men conjure deceitful potions but Ms. Tugwood also? She is a trusted saleswomen!"

"What is even more insulting is that she insisted she used Chinese Whomping cabbage for the potion. I've read more potion books than she ever could have, and not once has it ever been in reference to a youth potion. Mostly, it's for removing furniture smells and the occasional wood stain. It's complete ridiculousness."

"She thought she could fool me? There is no ingredient or potion or spell that could ever enforce youth for a however long an amount of time. It's as if she thinks her customers are unintelligible. I could tell she was nervous around me when I pulled up that bottle, but I was sure it was something to do with my status, but in retrospect I can see she was afraid of losing business with me after I found what a lying piece of filth of a product."

"Muggle methods!" Hesper exhaled sharply, a sound of frustration. Hesper had taken the news that Tugwood used muggle methods as a hurtful deceit; to think she had trusted her! "That dreaded witch uses muggle methods! Oh, had I known that before..." She stopped off, feeling disgusted with herself. After taking a sip of wine to calm herself, she muttered viciously her next words, heavy with sarcasm. "Perhaps muggle blood is more magical then we think, dear Sirius."

[hespergamp]

The Secret of Beauty ¦¦ Sacharissa & Hesper

[sacharissatugwood-blog]

Sacharissa was quite amused with Mrs. Black’s reaction. This “friend” she has, must’ve really needed it if Hesper agreed to take the embarrassment for herself, for Mrs. Black was known for her high status and good looks. It’s true that it didn’t look as if Hesper needed an anti aging potion, but the Black family is a rather… Unusual family. You may never know what dark magic posses them. At second thought, maybe Hesper’s beauty was unnatural, and it’s all caused by the hand of magic? If it is the case, then Sacharissa has to get her hands on that potion or spell, for it can do wonders to her products and career.

Another thing that caught her attention and seemed quite suspicious is the fact that Hesper has such a good friend, that she will rather to embarrass herself if it means that her friend’s reputation will stay unsullied. Mrs. Black seemed a bit of an ice queen; not very friendly, and to be honest- a bit of a snob.

As she noticed her mind is over-analyzing Mrs. Black’s behavior, she reacted, “Then you are exceptional friend, Mrs. Black” remarked with a grin. She couldn’t allow to herself to show even the slightest look of wonder, for it can be seen as rude- and she would most definitely not act with such brutal rudeness to one of her most loyal clients, and one as Mrs. Black is quite important.

“Excuse me?”  She almost stated, but luckily she stopped herself before adding this comment. She found this remark quite offensive; she and Hesper known each other for enough time to know that Sacharissa’s products are nothing but quality.

“I’ll have you know, Mrs. Black that I am a professional potioneer. The quality of my products is very high, and you can see results within no-time. I have combined both of the acceptable way of potion making in the wizarding world and Muggle world, for I have worked in Muggle laboratories and learning a different system, and I assure you that the mixed way I make my products is the best in the market yet, that’s why my products are different” she stated confidently.

Sacharissa was not quite sure if Mrs. Black would like that answer, for it included Muggles, which she knows the Black family aren’t really fond of, but it was the truth. With all due respect- and there is- if she’s unsure with the quality of the products, she is welcomed to buy somewhere else.  

[hespergamp]

"Muggles?" Hesper inhaled, deeply unsatisfied. Hearing that Tugwood had even worked, let alone used their techniques for her products, with muggles shocked her. She felt as if her trust in Tugwood had been broken, how dare she sell her something so closely related with muggles.

Hesper paused to peer down at her dress, smoothing out as she gained composure. It would not be good if anyone suspect that Hesper was anti-muggle, as the Ministry had recently been encouraging a peaceful co-existence between wizards and muggles. She and her husband had even gone to that dreaded intertwined wizard and muggle ball to show their (fake) support for the Ministry's decision. If all their plans were shambled by Hesper, then it would bode terribly on both her and the House of Black.

"I cannot understand what muggle mechanics could assist in such a way to help with something like this." She sharply turned her chin to the youth potion, but kept her voice soft, as if she were in questing what mechanics were being used. "Is there some sort of secrecy I have been shielded from? A muggle craft or ingredient that is just as powerful as magic?"

Although Hesper was bitterly mocking the lady, she still kept her voice delicate so Tugwood wouldn't perceive her cruel chiding. It was a game she often played with Sirius, in which their conversation would sound delightfully pleasant, but the core of it was filled with her heated rage. In retrospect, doing such with Sirius had really improved Hesper's ability to lie and cast a charming facade. Two qualities that were essential for when she ever was in company of others.

She watched the lady in front of her with a conscious glazing of innocence upon her face as she spoke. She wanted the woman to stutter, fumble, incapable of answering her question. What a fool Tugwood had been, believing muggles could be just as valuable of wizarding magic. A fool indeed, for her status had fallen before Hesper's eyes. 

She picked up one, two, three bottle of youth potion, clinking them as her palms touched together. "What is it, Ms. Tugwood? What is in these? What muggle genius was able to create something so valuable you used it in a youth potion? A secret, I am sure, but do not scare. I won't tell a soul." 

[hespergamp]

The Secret of Beauty ¦¦ Sacharissa & Hesper

[sacharissatugwood-blog]

Sacharissa sat down near the counter at her shop. It was a rather slow day; most people just passed by the store without even taking the slightest of looks, and even if they bothered to come in, they just walked around, played with the bottles a bit (one of the costumers almost dropped on the floor one of Sacharissa’s products, an anti-pimple lotion from her last collection, which made Sacharissa to feel anxious), but they didn’t decided to buy not a single product, accept for a one elderly lady who needed an anti-aging potion “as soon as possible”.

But that was until Mrs. Hesper Black stepped into her store. Sacharissa definitely remembers Mrs. Black; she first met her a few years ago, and Mrs. Black was quite impressed with her products. Not that she really needed any of those products, for Mrs. Hesper Black was one of the most beautiful women Sacharissa has known, and she is only 25 years old, and does not need an anti-aging potion whatsoever. Hesper was one of Sacharissa’s first and loyal customers, and Sacharissa considers her to be one of the main reasons her success was quite major among the nobility of wizards; Mrs. Black using her products surely gained her beauty items some popularity.

“Good afternoon to you too, Mrs. Black” she replied, nodding her head in return. As Mrs. Black entered the store, she started to exam the products with her eye, nothing too particular. Usually she buys products from the newer collections, or if her cabinet goes empty after a time, she comes back for more supply.

Suddenly, Hesper took one of the bottles from the middle shelf, a beauty product which is anti-aging, and just happens to be the product the old lady that came by today bought for herself. She couldn’t understand why did Hesper was interested in that potion, for she is young and does not need it at all. Maybe she needs him for an old friend?

“Oh no, it’s from two collections ago” she answered to Mrs. Black question. It seems like Sacharissa was still a bit anxious about her products from the incident that almost happened earlier today, and probably looked as she was anxious, because Hesper quickly put it back on the shelf. Maybe she didn’t want people to think that she uses anti-aging potion, she thought to herself, and in that case it wasn’t Sacharissa’s fault, but then again; the store is empty, and as much as Sacharissa loves gossip, she wouldn’t make up rumors about anyone, especially not about one of her most loyal customers, so Mrs. Black was a bit too paranoid.

“I have no doubt you don’t need it,” she responded to the things Hesper said earlier, “but it does work well on others. Do you need it for a friend, or would you like I’d show you something from a newer collection?”

[hespergamp]

"Oh. How peculiar I have not noticed this before. I am sure I have inspected your shop only a dozen times." She noted, with a sly sense of superiority, that Tugwood was more edgy than usual - perhaps Hesper was putting her on edge. That would be reasonable, considering who Hesper was. 

Feeling rather satisfied that Ms. Tugwood wouldn't assume Hesper was in need of the potion, she picked the tiny bottle up again. "Oh, yes. A friend. I've told her time and time again she is prematurely worrying about diminishing looks, but she insisted on purchasing some. Of course, I saved her the embarrassment and promised to take note of any I came across on the market, as no one could mistake I was buying it for myself." 

"I'm glad to hear you so confident in your product. Not to doubt, as you know I have more than once purchased from you and been entirely pleased, but these days one must be wary on what they spend their galleons on. Do say, how can you guarantee this potion will do what it proclaims? I have-- my friend has tried many youth potions in the past that have been either faulty or useless. Why is yours so different?"

Hesper had not intended to interrogate Ms. Tugwood, but potions that claimed to 'make oneself appear younger' often had drawbacks and if Tugwood was intending to deceive Hesper, or any other woman vulnerable to the potion, she would take her business elsewhere. Her clasp on  the bottle had become so tight, that the warmth from her palms was causing condensation on its tiny glass coating.

At last, Hesper released how distressed she had become, and peered down at the bottle in her hands. After deliberating that it was most likely more safe for Tugwood to be the one to handle the items, Hesper reached out to hand the bottle to her. She raised an eyebrow, waiting for an answer that would do nothing more than make her smile in delighted surprise.

"Ms. Tugwood, I have great trust in you as you have served me well over the years. Please do not say anything that will break this."

[hespergamp]

Rekindle for the Kids ¦¦ Sirius & Hesper

[siriusthefirst]

It was difficult some days to stay so passive, under Hesper’s indifferent – no, loathing gaze – and it was times like this that made everything tolerable. As she passed Lycoris into Sirius’s arms, he smiled. “Shan’t drop him, my love. This is the very future of this noble house, here in this room, and they will grow up healthy and happy. Isn’t that true, Lycoris,” Sirius said to the sleepy infant in his arms. “You’ll be big and strong, and clever as your mother, though better educated, of course.” He smiled broadly at Hesper. A pity, Sirius sometimes thought, that women had no access to a real education. Hesper could have been a truly spectacular witch, under other circumstances. So much natural talent, and wasted at that flimsy excuse for a school, tucked up in the French countryside.

But women had no need of such things. Particularly not a woman of Hesper’s standing, fated to marry into the most powerful family in Europe.

Sirius settled nto the armchair, resting Lycoris against his chest as Acturus crawled onto his lap, eyes wide with admiration and love. “And you, my boy. You will look after him, until you’re both grown, and then the two of you will own the whole of Europe. You’ll marry girls as handsome as your mother, if such girls are to be found anywhere at all. Perhaps you’ll have a sister some day, as well, and you shall ensure that she finds the right sort of company for herself.”

He immediately regretted saying it, when Arcturus’s eyes lit up.

Hesper would never deny that Sirius was a good father. For that, he was grateful. And she was an excellent mother. Sirius had seen, over the years, how many parents of their station ignored their children, abandoned them to nannies and other house staff – sometimes even the deplorable elves – until they were old enough to be interesting. Neither he nor Hesper would do something to crass. They were each deeply involved with their children’s lives.

But Sirius wanted more. He would have happily had six children, or eight, were there a way to conceive those children without engaging in the act Hesper so despised.

And surely she despised it, and not just Sirius himself. It was possible to eke pleasure from such relations without the least bit pf goodwill towards one’s bed partner, as Sirius knew well. Some of the most satisfying encounters of his life had occurred after a bitter fight. With emotions and blood running hot such things were not unheard of. But since the early days of their marriage, Hesper had rarely raised her voice to Sirius, nor he to her. Sometimes, he wished they would fight.

“My beautiful boys,” he said. “If you are the only children I have the good fortune to raise, I will still count myself the luckiest man in the world.” He raised his eyes to Hesper again. “Perhaps Arcturus will join us for our evening meal tonight,” he said mildly. A challenge. He and Hesper had not had a meal together in some days, other than at the endless social functions of the season. “What do you think, my dear?”

[hespergamp]

Hesper pulled her head up sharply at the mention of a sister, and almost flamed a blush to her cheeks. She half wanted to scold Sirius for even mentioning it, especially in front of the excited Arcturus who did nothing but support the idea. Hesper had only just given birth to Lycoris a few months past, and Sirius was suggesting more children? Was she nothing but a machine to him? Although Hesper hadn't been thinking of trying for another baby, she knew perhaps in a couple of years, when Lycoris was old enough to talk and Arcturus was beginning to lose his first teeth, she would crave another baby to mother.

She smiled at the wide eyed Arcturus, who was looking from her to Sirius, trying to gage their feelings on the proposition. "Well... Arcturus is big enough. Morgana tells me you have been using a fork by yourself like a real gentleman." He sucked on his lips, hiding a chuffed smile. It was an idea that did little to enthuse Hesper but nevertheless, Hesper wouldn't deny something that excited her son so much, even if it meant tolerating Sirius for an evening. 

"Yes, I wonderful idea, my love." 

                                             ----

Once again, Hesper had ordered for the dining table to be made. It had been several days since Sirius had proposed the idea, and even though Hesper was delighted to spend a meal with her son, she had been postponing as much as she could. The numbers of suppers she had with Sirius in Valhalla had dwindled to practically non-existent, perhaps only being a monthly duty they both forced themselves to attend. At least with Arcturus there, she could spend her time doting on him so that the forced conversation with Sirius would be a minimal.

As they surrounded the table and took their seats (Hesper had sided herself closer to Arcturus), she tucked a napkin into Arcturus's shirt and pulled up his sleeves an inch, despite his protests. Breaking the silence, Hesper consciously spoke some words in appreciation of his time here as he was a 'busy man' with 'many duties'. The usual first words with Sirius - completely insincere and forced. 

Arcturus was doing well to maintain his 'big boy' bravado, despite a few peas falling of his fork and pinging to the floor every now and then. With each pea that fell, Hesper shot a look at the house elf who was standing in the corner, a silent order that the floor was to be cleaned to an inch of its life after the meal. Arcturus watched Sirius with complete concentration as he mimicked exactly how he ate- raising the food to his mouth at the same time as Sirius, pausing to chew, electing which vegetables went together- (Hesper hoped this was not a fad that Arcturus would maintain when he was an adult - the potential horrors he might pick up from Sirius made her throw a harsh look at her potatoes).

"I heard the terrible news about the vandalism of Ms. Tugwood's shop. Such a shame, I was rather fond of a few of her products. Surreal also, as I had visited her just a day before." She was speaking softer, as if muttering her own thoughts aloud to herself. "It's terrifying to think such vulgar acts could have taken place whilst I was viewing the store. I'm thankful the criminals are cowards and decided to do so at night, when no one was there." 

[antoniusmalfoy]

Instincts Are Misleading || Flashback || Antonius & Hesper

[antoniusmalfoy]

Antonius caught the venom in Hesper’s tone about Hogwarts. Tsk, tsk, she had better not let her future father-in-law hear her speak about his school in that manor. He would be most displeased. Antonius was not bored enough to inquire about what types of classes were offered at her school. Perhaps a topic for another time. He could not imagine that Sirius was paired with an empty headed girl. She seemed witty enough, he thought, the more he spoke with her. More capable than she looked. 

Her grasp on his hand and the pull of her eyes caught him off guard. No one, especially not a high-bred socialite, had ever looked at him like that before. He bit his bottom lip, willing himself to not react to her. She would have to do much more to unhinge him. He was not set on offending her than simply eager to ruffle her and to him, there was a distinct difference between the two. She was practically melting in his arms, but he knew she was not being fresh with him. She was making a mockery of the situation. He remained stiff, determined to actually teach her to dance properly. Sirius did not deserve to be wed to a second-rate dancer. It would be humiliating, considering the scrutiny their marriage would be under in the press.

Looking down at Hesper, Antonius’ breath caught. She was exceedingly beautiful now that he had a good look at her. Her hazel eyes shined in the light and he found her dimples incredibly endearing. He wanted to press his thumbs against them, he wanted to sink into her skin. He looked away from her, the moment that she instructed the pianist to play. “I will more than adequately sweep you off your feet.” He promised in a clam voice as he listened to the beat of the music. “Pfft. I would not dare to marry a woman that was not quick on her feet.” He muttered arrogantly and closed the extra foot of distance between them.

“Ah, I was hoping Miss Gamp and I would waltz.” He stated loudly over to the pianist, not bothering to part from his partner as he waited for a different song to play.

“This is a smooth and quite popular dance for us in London. It is important for you to master it.” He explained to Hesper. “A dance that you need a male partner to learn best with. You will not be jerked around by your partner, therefore you must not be afraid of me.” 

“The easiest way to remember the dance is that we will be making a box shape with our feet.” He stated, looking down at their feet. “Our steps will mirror each other in a gentle fashion. As I take one step forward with my left foot, you will be taking one step backward with your right. Ideally, when performed by a confident partner, you will quickly stop thinking about your feet and simply react to me.” 

As they glided around the room, on every turn, their chests seemed to get closer. He made no reaction as he brushed against her, but thought she would pull away eventually. He never did, believing it would be too awkward. When he felt confident in her steps, he took her faster around the room. He was pleased by her progress. Someone had taught her the dance in the past, he supposed, but the refinement was serving her well. He surprised her by twirling her in his arms, but he did it too quick. Not allowing her to trip, his hands pressed firmly against her back and he held her in place. “I think it might be time for a break.” He announced and lifted her back up, steadying her on the soles of her feet. “Should we call for some water?”

[hespergamp]

Initially, Hesper followed his lead idly, bored -and slightly annoyed- at the prospect of being taught by a man no more than three years her elder (she had to resist rolling her eyes at his comment of 'being afraid' of him, knowing if he so much as tempted her, she could have him screwed up into a matchbox). But, as they dropped into the rhythm of the music, Hesper found she was actually having to concentrate on not leading, until she finally let herself go and be submissive to the moves of Mr. Malfoy.

Despite herself, it was not that unpleasant. Certainly more pleasant than dancing with that goon of an old lady. But that was easy to explain - the old lady was frail and in desperate need of support, whilst Antonius could very much hold himself and Hesper along with him. Dancing with Sirius was far far different than with Antonius, as Sirius had a softness to him. Perhaps he was worried about hurting Hesper or simply didn't know how to hold a woman. Whichever reason, Sirius allowed Hesper to lead, whereas Antonius was firmer, more dedicated to take the male persona in the dance.

At her surprise, Antonius spun her, causing her foot to land clumsily on the other. Her eyes widened as the inevitable falling over came - but it didn't. As quick as a cricket, Antonius's hands saved her from the disastrous fall. Hesper's cheeks coloured in embarrassment, and straightened herself up. She could handle the essential touching of hands and shoulders in dance, but anymore than that had her upset. "Yes - yes a rest would be ideal."

Hesper slowly made her way to the window, keeping pace with Antonius, then used her wand to pour water from the jug residing on the ledge into two glasses. She took seat on the cushioned window seat. "Mr. Malfoy, I must admit I am obliged to swallow my words. You... you dance graciously." She dipped her head, and held a small part of her dress outwards, as if she were straightening it out to stop it folding, to adapt a curtsy in the sitting position. "It was a pleasure."

"My, I hear Sirius talk endlessly about you. With the way he speaks of you, I was sure you would have a halo sketched above your head. I am comforted to know the friends he obtains are just as gentlemanly as Sirius himself." 

She crossed, then uncrossed her ankles in a playful manner, deciding that Antonius's company was maybe not that dreadful to put up with, and that was a relief as she had spent many months bored to death in Valhalla. The thought of having even one person that wasn't torture to converse with in Valhalla, even if it were only on the occasion they spoke, put Hesper in a brighter mood.

[hespergamp]

The Secret of Beauty ¦¦ Sacharissa & Hesper

There were few things in life that Hesper considered flawless; one being her children, two being the extensive painting on the drawing room floor, and three being the products of Ms. Sacharissa Tugwood. In the current world, there were always con-artists eager to sell you 'pearls of beauty' (which would really sprout boils in places no gentleman should look) and other faulty items, so it was absolutely essential that Hesper buy only from the top retailers, and fortunately she had come across Tugwood only a few years ago.

It was that time again - Hesper's beauty cabinet was almost empty and yearned to be filled yet again. Of course over the years Hesper had accumulated her 'usual' order, and persistently resisted from buying any of Tugwood's new stock (unless she happened to suggest it at a time Hesper was feeling somewhat insecure about her features). Yet, this didn't stop her from politely scanning the display - with a perfectly intent face that suggested Ms. Tugwood's products were utterly delightful and that she would have to forcibly resist buying them all. 

"Good afternoon, Ms. Tugwood." Hesper entered the store, her dress flocking the aisle, and gave the lady a polite half nod before turning her attention to the hundreds of little bottles on display. 

A particular blue one caught her eye - it was a blue that matched Antonius's eyes - with small print that described itself to be some sort of youth potion. She took the bottle in her hands. Although Hesper never worried about her features growing old, she had had two children, and no matter how much people complimented her on her physique, Hesper knew child baring could throw years onto you. She looked to Ms. Tugwood. "Is this new?" 

She took an uncomfortable intake of breath, regretting picking the item up. In the public front, Hesper was deemed beautiful, which she secretly enjoyed, but if it ever came about in Vanity Witch that she was relying on anti - aging potions, Hesper would pass out from humiliation (and then proceed to bring the demise of Vanity Witch). Hesper carefully put the bottle back, giving Tugwood a small smile, her words racing quicker than usual. "I'm sorry. Simply curious. I... I have no need for this item. Though, I don't doubt it must work miracles for those who do need it." 

[antoniusmalfoy]

Instincts Are Misleading || Flashback || Antonius & Hesper

[antoniusmalfoy]

Antonius grinned as Hesper pouted. Her lips had turned a brilliant shade of berry. Pride overwhelmed him as she took a step back. He was affecting her. So easily offended, so fragile, whatever would Sirius do with her. He would eat her alive. She was no match for his best mate. He perked an eyebrow as she scanned him, he remained tall and proud, refusing to move. He was uncertain what she was looking for. It had not even crossed his mind whether she was implying that his family was of lower standing than hers. That would be laughable. Her neck was lovely, he thought as she turned to look away from him. She was full of grace and beauty. His brows furrowed, not knowing why he just thought that. She was just a girl.

“Pardon, ah, Miss Gamp. I did not mean to offend you. I understand that a lady matched with Sirius could not have  worked a day in her life.” Antonius replied, restraining from placing a single hand on her right shoulder. He was mildly curious if her skin was as soft as it looked. “I was simply making conversation about how you spend your free time. Girls at Hogwarts frequently made patterns and such.” He shrugged, remembering the many tokens that his admirers made him in school.

Oh he had bothered her greatly, he mused watching her cross her arms. He liked her looking this, more spirited. He would see to making her act out more often. It wasn’t as if he would ever put their reputations in danger since Sirius would not approve. It would be a challenge to keep it in line, but that was part of the fun. Listening to Hesper assert her musical abilities caused him to drop his grin at once. Sirius had not mentioned her playing to him and Antonius had not bothered to ask. Why would he have? “I am certain that you are a fine musician.” He answered with a quick nod. “I look forward to hearing you play in the future when you are ready.” 

“I have a great admiration for the arts.” Antonius explained. “I attend many shows… London has much to offer nearly every night. While I am not one for crowds, I do enjoy dancing. It is of the finest pastimes. May I say— I do believe that you would benefit from a volunteer male.” He added. It dawned on him that he never should have said that, but now he had to follow through. It would be unlike him to back down from his word. 

“Someone more naturally inclined to take the lead, like I am.” Antonius offered and held out his hand. Now she could inspect him all she wanted. He had nothing to hide. “It would be my honor to help you prepare for the greatest event of the season. At least I can help with the popular dances.” He winked at her elderly instructor. He wasn’t sure if she noticed. “Consider it my apology for offending you earlier. After all, I want the best for Sirius.” He stared at Hesper wondering what she would do next. He never had the intention of proposing such a thing when he entered the room, but he certainly was not lonely anymore. He wondered if she would pout again. He was counting on it.

[hespergamp]

Hesper commended herself for concealing a snort after learning Hogwarts girls sewed. But on second thought, she really ought not to have been surprised; after all, it was Hogwarts. "Mr. Malfoy, I am far, far more different than those girls at Hogwarts."

Hesper arched a perfect eyebrow. He was looking forward to hear her play in the future? When she 'was ready'? If it weren't for that condescending ending, Hesper would have bitterly laughed and wished him to cease being so ridiculously forward as she would never perform for him, but his last words irked her. He spoke to her as if she were a child, which technically she was in his perspective, and she fully resisted being spoken to as anything less than like an adult, as her father always told her she was just as mature as an adult despite only hedging on the edge of 17 (the irony of it was that Antonius had been the first person to propose she do something when she was ready, even with such a trivial thing as playing the piano, yet those words had yet to be uttered in regards to her marriage). And it was for this reason, that she suddenly wanted to prove herself to Antonius that she was just as much, and no doubt more, an adult as he.  "Perhaps on a rainy day." She muttered in nonchalance, knowing full well she would most definitely play for Antonius some day.

It appeared this man's forte was insulting her; he was now insulting her dancing? Worst of all, he didn't even seem to notice he had done so. Hesper pursed her lips at his atrocities. As he continued talking, Hesper had to consciously watch his face neutrally, so disgust wouldn't cross her features.

She took his hand, with a harshness she had intended -but failed- to conceal. And without a word, she drew herself closer to him, her eyes staring unwavering into his, as if she were challenging him. A silent challenge, of course, as she would deny to her grave, if he accused her of such, that she would be so bold to behave like the rowdy men in bars do when they fight. After all, Hesper intended always to be viewed as a good, submissive, dainty young lady - as her father insisted she should always be-  but if she could assert some dominance over a situation with eyes that could threaten, lie and kill, by Merlin she would use them.

"Oh, please, Mr. Malfoy. Do teach me." She spoke with an exaggerated eagerness, mostly to delight herself with her mischievous mocking. Perhaps it was the adrenaline from the temper he had brought out of her, but Hesper had not even spared a thought that she was now in the hands of a strange man - something that would have terrified her a month ago.

He may have been half a foot taller than her, but his blue eyes still blazed beautifully and their clarity was not compromised from the distance. Hesper hoped she should come across a piece of jewelry with that sharp colour to wear, as she was rather fond of it. She wanted to be cold and reserved from Antonius, but his eyes, regrettably  made that very hard to do. She almost cracked a smile when he winked.

"Play." She looked over to the pianist before turning back to Antonius, allowing a genuine smile to shyly brush over her lips, slightly unsure that she was not in her element to jest yet. "And if you fail so disastrously in playing teacher, perhaps I should take the time to teach you how to dance. It would only be fair as you do so to generously help me be... satisfactory" -she said through clenched teeth- "for Sirius, and I would do so to help you with whomever you decide to marry. And Mr. Malfoy, if that is how it pans out, do not fret; I shall not judge."  

[antoniusmalfoy]

Instincts Are Misleading || Flashback || Antonius & Hesper

[antoniusmalfoy]

Antonius tilted his head at Hesper as she pretended to not recognize him. She amused him, even slightly so, he would admit. Even if she was telling the truth, he was damn well willing to bet that her parents knew of him. He was an eligible bachelor from an excessively wealthy estate. Men like him did not exactly come in batches, especially under the age of 30. “How rude of me.” He answered placing his right hand on his chest. “My lady, I am Mr Antonius Malfoy from Wiltshire.” He smiled, showcasing his perfect teeth. “Guess the blonde hair and blue eyes are not as remarkable as they say… Liars all of them.” He added in jest.

“As you can see, I have plenty of mentors with me already. I do not need your supervision also.” That little comment of hers made him move off the wall and in her direction. “No, my lady, I would be a terrible a supervisor as a former Slytherin.” He replied smoothly. “We are typically the supervised.” Antonius shrugged, but then turned to stone in seconds. He found it difficult to not deliver a scathing look at Hesper as she suggested to look for Belvina in the garden. She essentially was kicking him out of the room and it didn’t even belong to her yet. Terribly rude of her, she had no right. Sirius and him were life-long best mates. He was not about to be pushed aside by her just because she was something new. Not a bloody chance.

“Belvina is not outside.” He replied in a smooth, calm voice and crossed his arms. “I was just outside myself. The weather will not accommodate until after sunset.” He explained with a single raised brow. He wondered if she knew or cared that Sirius spent most nights on adventures with him. They’d drink, smoke, and flirt with questionable ladies. All in the name of having fun before his honeymoon period. Hesper, being a socialite, was rarely allowed out after hours without constant supervision to protect her reputation. She could never witness Sirius being natural like he knew him to be. Such a shame it was to be marrying into a lie. It disgusted him. He was most grateful that his parents permitted access to their vault if he remained a bachelor. He wouldn’t know what to do if he was forced to share quarters with someone that he didn’t have an emotional connection with. For the most part, he found relationships difficult,that is other than trusting Sirius with his life.

“I had nothing important to say to the little one.” He stated and made no move to leave the room, continuing to stand nonchalantly so. “We will converse at another time. I wrongly assumed it was her playing just now.” He uncrossed his arms and took a few steps closer to Hesper, they only stood a foot apart now as he continued to explain. “I should have known better… Belvina is a better player. She is quite accomplished for her age. How about you, Miss Gamp? Are you proficient with an instrument or are you more the needlework type?” He asked and tilted his down at her, inspecting her again. She was short.

[hespergamp]

This one was trouble. He had cheek, and a lovely face that suggested he often got away with it. And it was for that reason that Hesper allowed herself only to pout haughtily instead of laugh at his comical jest. It was obvious in the way he spoke and the way he lounged around comfortably in her presence, that he regarded himself as a bad boy. His attractive smirk did nothing more than support this theory.

Hesper had often heard the girls in Beauxbatons giggle and fawn lustrously over men far too arrogant than needed be, which confused Hesper endlessly. Although she had barely considered what kind of qualities she would prefer in a husband, being wed to a man dubbed as a 'bad boy' made no sense - surely a lady deserved a gentleman?

Sirius was certainly had not displayed any 'bad boy' qualities, and could firmly be described as a gentleman, yet he still cast an ugly chill over her skin. Standing in front of Mr. Antonius Malfoy, who had, in the short time of talking, exhibited more than one quality one could refer to as being 'bad', it left Hesper feeling ill.  Perhaps she ought to have signed a contract to the nunnery. 

It was needless to say Hesper was more than taken back at Antonius's rude comment, so much so that she reclined back a step, fighting the urge to drop her mouth. Was she more the needlework type? Could he be anymore derogatory!  Sirius had mentioned some time ago (Hesper was listening idly, far more concerned with the button on her glove, and only picked up a phrase or two of what he was saying) that his closest friend Antonius was a year his senior. In retrospect, this was both humorous and ironic, since he was behaving as impolitely as a five year old would. 

"I assure you, Mr. Malfoy, that I have not so much as lifted a cloth to sew in my life. In my family, we have the house elves attend to such menial jobs, though I understand that some may not have the luxury of house elves or servants. Which is unfortunate, as manual labor and other idle processes can be detrimental to appearance." She cast a look at his hands, wanting to seek callouses or blister or some sort of indicator that he was beneath her, having to degrade himself to rough duties. 

She turned elegantly, so he could not see her face, to compose herself. Mr. Malfoy was utterly one of a kind - never had seen been spoken to so rudely. After a moment of composure, she turned back to his handsome face.

"If your desire to find out whether my skill with instruments are worthy, you ought to ask the opinion of Sirius himself, as he has more than once heard me play and he had been nothing but complimentary - even when  I was so nervous I missed a note. But now you mention it, I should get back to practicing as I do not want to be upstaged by an eight year old." She crossed her arms, examining him; she refused to be the one to walk away first - if she did, then it would mean nothing more than he had succeeded in intimidating her and she would not sacrifice her dignity like that.  

[hespergamp]

Rekindle for the Kids ¦¦ Sirius & Hesper

[siriusthefirst]

Sirius felt a terrible pang, at the look on his wife’s face. Her forced civility. At times like this he sometimes saw a flash, just a moment when Sirius thought Hesper might not truly hate him – that she might be thawing over time – even the smallest hope that they might one day genuinely be friends, if nothing more. But her gritted teeth told the truth. She did not love him, could not love him. Despised him, still, though he believed she thought him an adequate father. Many other men of his station barely saw their children until they were approaching school age. Unless it was to show them off at a social function. Sirius loved his sons. Once he achieved immortality he would bring them with him; a never-ending line of Black men, ruling over wizarding Europe, becoming more powerful with each unfolding generation.

How he would love to make Hesper a part of that world. But the thought of one lifetime with Sirius made her lip curl so. An eternity would make her spit, and tear her hair out. Perhaps in time things might change, though Sirius couldn’t imagine it. He tried. He imagined a softening, over time, perhaps as the boys grew. Imagined a third child conceived in affection, instead of with gritted teeth and that aching sense of humiliation that had always followed their marital acts. Sometimes, with the early morning sun streaming in his window, Sirius imagined waking with Hesper sleepy and smiling in his bed; though he knew they was nothing more than imagination at play.

For no reason Sirius could pinpoint, it brought to mind the odd quarrel with Antonius. So strange. Perhaps he should speak to Antonius about it.

Sirius snapped from his thoughts, summoning the broom with a smile. “Tell me, Arcturus – can you kick off the ground, yet?” These play brooms were very amusing. They only floated a foot or two from the ground, and no great speed could be achieved, but they were amusing. Brooms. A childish pastime. Sirius spent a moment wondering if indulging this would produce another Cygnus, determined to besmirch the family name with dreams of professional Quidditch – but of course not. Arcturus was barely more than a baby. He could learn to love to ride – could play Quidditch, in fact – and still be a suitable head for the Noble House of Black when the time came for Sirius to pass him the mantle. Arcturus would be married, perhaps have a child or two of his own, by then, and Sirius and Hesper would be doting grandparents.

Sirius helped Arturus on his chubby little legs to straddle the broom. “Just a gentle kick,” he said, standing, his hands on his son’s waist, guiding him. Arcturus’s delighted shriek made Sirius laugh, lightened his heart. “Look at him, dear,” he said to Hesper, as he let go of Arcturus’s tiny body, hovering close enough to catch him. “I do believe he’s a natural. A Black through and through.”

As Arcturus began to push himself through the room, clinging to the broom with white knuckles, tiny pink tongue sticking out in concentration, Sirius returned his attention to Hesper. He felt suddenly bold, cheered by the sight of a tiny boy on a tiny broom.

Hesper, with Lycoris on her knee, was a sight to behold. Sirius gave a smile he intended to be mild, but one which he feared stretched across his whole face, betraying him utterly. “I had hoped to hold Lycoris a while,” he admitted, “But I would not deny myself the sight of him on your knee for all the Galleons in Gringott’s.”

[hespergamp]

Oddly, Hesper always found pleasure watching Sirius interact with Arcturus. Whether it was only to place a kiss on his forehead or to play along with his games, Hesper approved greatly. A child deserved love from both parents, after all, and that was fully what she intended her children to have. 

"Don't let him fall." She cast Sirius a quick look of panic. It was tempting to sharpen her tone, but she didn't want to insult his parenting - she knew that would be one insult too far.

Flattering. It was a tactic Sirius had used sincerely as they became more familiar with each other during their engagement, but once they were married and the struggles began to show, any term of endearment sounded false on his lips. Affection was thrown around carelessly between the two, especially in public or in company. 

Still, his comment made her uncomfortable.  It made her inwardly sneer, though the smile she kept on her face, for Arcturus's benefit, didn't falter. Why having Lycoris on her knee would make any difference to him being on any other ladies' knee, she didn't know. Unless he often preyed his eyes on Morgana with Lycoris in her hands, admiring the scene. "That would be a detrimental move for investment." She remarked idly.

"No, it is quite fair you hold him. I wont be greedy." She rose Lycoris in her arms, to kiss his cheeks gently. Then, she stood, trying not to upset Lycoris by moving too quickly, and walked over to Sirius (avoiding the whizzing Arcturus) so she could carefully put the baby into his arms.

As a general rule, physical contact with Sirius was to be avoided at all costs in private. Of course, Hesper had the ability to desensitize in company and numbly cling to his arm as if he was the only thing keeping her smiling. But, when there was no people to flaunt her 'appreciation' for him, it felt wrong to go near him. Almost awkward, as she knew they both were tolerating each other. But she didn't let her dislike show, when  hands touched arms and arms touched hands, handing the oblivious Lycoris over. 

"Come here, Arcturus." She placed a hand on the broom to steady it, then pulled him off it, so his small feet were back on the ground. "Your Father's lap is big enough for the both of you." Her hand rested on the small boy's shoulder, as if to guide him to Sirius. In the back of her mind, Hesper was questioning why so was insisting to involve Sirius so much, but it was not something she wanted to dwell on. Perhaps it made him easier to tolerate, seeing him kind and protective and loving with his boys.

[hespergamp]

Rekindle for the Kids ¦¦ Sirius & Hesper

[siriusthefirst]

Sirius had been feeling out of sorts for the last two days, at minimum. Very difficult to say exactly why, but he had his suspicions. Too long between adventures. The summer made it difficult to do what needed doing. His experiments were lagging, and he required physical fulfilment.

Very difficult to manage such things at a time when people were coming and going to social functions at all hours of the day and night, when everyone was at home so frequently. Difficult, too, with London warm and welcoming, people strolling out of doors, of an evening. The brothels were busy, this time of year, and a magical exit more difficult to achieve, and the universities full of bold boys aligned to the classicists and eager for life experience at the hands of a talented lover were, for the most part, empty.

So little gave Sirius joy, and this too was denied him, for now.

He stepped lightly up the stairs. Before him, the lanterns obediently lit themselves, casting pretty flickering light and shadow play over the walls. Sirius smiled, pleased, as he made his way down the hallway and towards his destination.

Sirius had desire of his sons’ company. Arcturus and his few precious words were always a balm, and Lycoris and his pretty, heavy eyelids, and odd grimaces. Sirius looked forward to the day when they were both bigger, when they could bring them along to the occasional picnic or daytime gathering, rather than leave them with –

“Morgana,” Sirius said, startled.

“Mrs. Black is with your sons,” the nanny said, nervous. “She bade me go.”

Sirius was taken aback. “Quite,” he said. Also, “Well.” And he let her pass, and paused there by a door that led to – well, he wasn’t sure. A guest room, perhaps.

Things has been very strange between Sirius and Hesper since the tense outing with Antonius. Sirius has a terrible temptation to sit his wife down, and ask her if there was some deeper cause to the tension – had they quarrelled, whilst he was in London so long? What on earth about? Was she concerned about his… relationship with the Boothby woman? Antonius wouldn’t even bed a woman like that, not even for the temporary balm – surely, Hesper wasn;t listening to the gossip.

Sirius thought he might go, leave Hesper to her afternoon with their sons, but he found, suddenly, that he craved the company of all three of them. With the children, he and Hesper ceased being civil for the sake of civility, and were able to be parents. She would be herself, state her opinions, assure him that the boys were progressing at the right pace. She would be a mother, and his wife was never so fine in the newest London fashions and the most extraordinary jewellery as she was with a squirming boy in her lap, being, quite purely, a mother.

Sirius took the last few steps and steeled himself. He opened the door, to the shy, beaming smile on his eldest son’s face, to Hesper seated on the ay lounge with Lycoris looking sleepy an happy, curled against his chest.

When Arcturus called “Papa!” Sirius stooped to his knee. “Come here, son,” he said, holding his arms out for an embrace. Arcturus flew to him. Every day, he looked more like Sirius. He would be a man before Sirius knew it.

“You are so tall,” Sirius said, as he pulled his son close, and smiled at Hesper. She wished to look cold, for Sirius’s benefit, no doubt, but with Lycoris in her lap, she could not.

“You look very well, my dear,” Sirius said. The first time he had dared use the endearment since the ill-fated Quidditch match. “What a pleasant surprise.”

[hespergamp]

Sirius looked drained. Perhaps he had been having trouble sleeping? If so, Hesper had no clue what may be preventing him from the sweet escape of sleep; he had no taxing duties or heavy workloads that may be causing him stress. Fortunately, it was not her problem.

"Tall like his father." She smiled endearingly at Arcturus. He looked chuffed, pleased to be compared to his father. Of course, to Arcturus, his father was a hero and an idol. It was clear to see he tried his utmost to receive approval from Sirius.

She jigged Lycoris to give herself something to do. It was a pain, being with the children together as it meant they had to interact convincingly civil to each other, just as a real mother and father who were in love would. Of course, this rule had never been spoken aloud, yet it was solidly tacit.

Despite her lack of approval of all things Sirius, Hesper couldn't deny he was a good father. Watching him now, with little Arcturus in his hands, she could see genuine happiness and love in his eyes for his children. It was in these moments, and these moments alone, that Hesper's heart defrosted slightly. Sirius had not abandoned his children and leave them solely for the nanny to nurture like some men in his position had, instead Sirius was quite the opposite; Hesper had frequently walked into the nursery to see Sirius doting over his sons. He wanted to be a part of their lives, not some man who only conversed with them to dictate how they should rule the family once they were of age.

It was strange, but Hesper had not once regretted her decision to have children with him. Although he was not a man she loved, seeing the pure love he had for their sons made her feel justified in baring children into a loveless marriage; she was adamant her sons would never find out their parents could barely stand to converse with one another. After all, it had been Sirius who had initially spoken of his craving to be a father. And surely, if the both of them loved their children more than the earth itself, it shouldn't matter if the two adults did not love each other.

Their situation was secretly complicated, but when had it not been? That was something that was not unusual, but Hesper could not help but feel the tension from her and Antonius's argument still lingered. Sirius was not foolish enough to fail to comprehend the discomfort that stood between them now. Really, it was odd that he had not commented on it, which was lucky for Hesper.

"Thank you," She noticed his conscious effort to be affectionate in front of the children and added after a small pause (despite the sickening taste in her mouth trying to produce the word); "my... love." 

Surely it sounded false, but she tried to be as convincing as possible, for the sake of Arcturus's ears. She held the toy broom that was still in her hand. "Arcturus is a keen quidditch fan. Just like your Uncle Cygnus, isn't that right? Perhaps when the weather is brighter, we shall take you out on the gardens to fly this broom a little higher. Just you, me and your father? We can go when Lycoris is having a nap, so we can have you all to ourselves." She winked at the small boy, gently pushing the miniature broom into the air, watching it take off by itself for several seconds before looping twice and settling on the ground. She finally set her eyes on her husband. "What do you think of that, daddy?"    

[antoniusmalfoy]

Instincts Are Misleading || Flashback || Antonius & Hesper

The heat outside was unbelievably unfair and unnatural. Antonius would have loved to be on his new broom at this moment, but after nearly fainting, he decided it was best to get inside until after sunset. He would not be flying into his bedroom at Malfoy Manor because he was currently a guest at the massive estate of Valhalla which Sirius Black would inherit after his upcoming marriage. Sirius, his best mate, had invited him to stay over for most of the summer to “keep him sane”. Naturally Antonius was pleased to spend his time there, except on days like these. Days were Sirius was away on Head of House tutorials and there was no entertainment for Antonius. It was hours such as these in which Antonius considered apparating to the city, but no adventure would be as interesting without Sirius. Therefore, after bathing and redressing, Antonius simply wandered around the never-ending corridors and staircases. He was utterly aimless and lost in thought until he heard music playing. Someone in the castle was playing the piano. Antonius assumed it was Belvina practicing and he was not sure if he felt like talking to her, but at least it would give him something to do. No mattered how much she annoyed him (as the sister he never had), since she’d fix this overwhelming loneliness currently plaguing his heart.

“Oh, Bells, you’re—.” Antonius had to awkwardly stop mid-speech. He was just about to tease the child for being “off-key” as he had entered the ballroom, but she was not the one playing the cheery tune. “I do apologize… I thought to find the Little Miss Black in here.” He explained and moved to lean casually against the rear wall.

The ballroom was in fact occupied by Hesper Gamp, Sirius’ wife-to-be and Antonius’ least favorite person in the world. He wished she was not about to marry his best mate in a few weeks. This young lady of only 16 would take Sirius away from him. She would ruin them. What could she possibly know about keeping Sirius happy? He huffed at the thought.

Upon observation, Antonius concluded that Hesper was practicing a new dance with her small entourage of help. In the corner, an elderly lady was playing the piano, in another was a lady reading and finally the lady teaching Hesper how to dance. How lovely to see her fitting in her new home, Antonius thought sarcastically about Hesper. He made no move to leave the ballroom. In fact, Antonius decided to walk closer to them. “How do you do, Miss Gamp?” He greeted without emotion. Despite both of them staying on the same estate for summer, they hadn’t spoken much and never so intimately like this.

Hesper was decent looking, Antonius thought. Her cheeks were playfully rosy, but that was just a side effect from dancing. He was skeptical that they looked like that all of the time. Her waist was small, perhaps more than Sirius liked. She was also rather short. She would have to purchase proper heels to stand with Sirius in their society photographs. There would be many of those. Antonius continued to stare without shame, scrutinizing her every part for possible mutations. Certainly Sirius would have to cancel the wedding if she was not physically perfect. Only the best of women were permitted to mate with a Black.

[hespergamp]

Dancing was a dull thing, especially when concentration was needed on keeping the frail woman intact rather than improving one's step. Hesper's father had been insisting that she spend more time at Mr Black's living quarters during the summer, to get herself acquainted with the man she were to be spending the rest of her life with. And they said purgatory came after death. 

After several forced meetings, Hesper was eventually allowed to roam around the mansion without Sirius or his parents at her side. Initially, this seemed like a good thing. Oh, how she was mistaken. Hesper felt awkward partially living (she insisted to label it that, since most of her daylight hours were consumed with being in the presence of Sirius or his house) in a home that was not hers. She felt like an intruder, especially since she was inwardly ungrateful for any kind gesture given to her; she cared not for gifts and trinkets and food and chit-chat, she simply wanted to go home. Even worse, Sirius seemed to have a hundred siblings that popped up at every corner, resulting in forced small talk and fake smiling. By the end of the day, Hesper's cheeks hurt. 

This afternoon, Hesper had been 'treated' with the activity of dance lessons. She couldn't decide which was the greatest reward of it: dancing her feet raw or the awful piano music. It had just gone past an hour since the beginning when there was an interruption at the door. At first, Hesper had automatically assumed a servant boy had interrupted her lesson but upon looking at him she realised such a fine make of robes would be far above the standard a servant boy would have.

Hesper immediately detached herself from the biddy old woman whom had been teaching her the art of ballroom, causing the pianist to stop. Her memory ached to attach the name of Malfoy, or something similar, to his face. It was true, Hesper may have passed him once before during her previous visits to Valhalla, but she had not paused to pay him any attention and to be perfectly honest she intended to keep it that way.

Ah, so he knew her name? Perhaps he did have some importance to the family, rather than just being a friend of Belvina's. Either way, the fact that he was purposely searching for Belvina's company skewed Hesper's opinion of him. Child or no child, Belvina's tongue was just as sharp as an adult's, despite the adorable, innocent look in her eyes. Could he be the influence causing 'Little Miss Black's' crudeness? From what Hesper had noticed, Sirius was never as crude as she and neither was his other siblings. Perhaps it was due to her young age and it was something that would be grown out of over time.

"Well. Thank you. And you are?" She rose an eyebrow. Despite being almost certain he was a Malfoy, Hesper didn't want the young man to feel as if he were important enough to be known by her. Perhaps that would wipe the rude, smug look off his handsome young face.

Hesper crossed her arms, annoyed at his shameless staring. She shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, feeling like a slab of meat being inspected before purchase. Scowling, she eyed his casual stance against the wall; it was as if he were relaxing to watch entertainment. "As you can see, I have plenty of mentors with me already. I do not need your supervision also. You should care to know Miss Black is likely out in the gardens, since you were searching for her. " 

[hespergamp]

Rekindle for the Kids ¦¦ Sirius & Hesper

There was a small cheering inside the nursery followed by an outburst of giggling. The sound instantly caused Hesper to smile; little Arcturus' laughing was infectious. She couldn't help but peer inside the nursery.

"Ma- mother!" Arcturus crooned in an adorable voice, rising from the floor to go to her. His small, sticky fingers clung to her dress as he childishly hid his face into her skirts.

"The children are fine with me, Morgana." Hesper stood stiffly, waiting for the nanny to leave before she turned her attention to her son.  

"Arcturus, you've grown mightily. Quite soon you will be a man." She chuckled with an edge of bitterness, bending so her face was level with his. She took a moment to hold him in her hands, as if doing so would keep him from aging anymore - something she was terrified of as she knew aging did nothing but cause innocence to die.  Arcturus, oblivious to her thoughts, handed her his toy broom, chewing on his lip. It was a nervous habit Hesper had noticed whenever he was around strangers. Such a notion filled her with guilt - she should be visiting her children more often. Hesper took the broom in her hands, as if she were carefully inspecting it. "Have you been teaching your brother how to play, Arcturus?" 

Hesper rose, walking towards the crib in which Lycoris laid awake, and selfishly took him out to hold him. She knew it was soon the time that Lycoris was meant to nap, but the feeling of his velvet hair and soft skin persuaded her to keep him in her arms for a little while longer. She took seat in one of the chairs, craddeling Lycoris against her. Arcturus stood by her closely and watched her for several seconds before lifting his arms up to be placed on her lap also. Hesper chuckled at his attempts. "You're too big, my little gentleman. My lap is not big enough for the both of you." 

It was hard to comprehend how much love a child could give. At times, just like these, Hesper could safely say she had had no one love her as much as her children did before. Lycoris rested contently against her chest, Arcturus gazed up at her with his piercing eyes, desperate for her comfort and love  - until a noise at the door stole his attention from her.

"Papa!" Arcturus cried in delight, tearing the smile from Hesper's face. He was beaming shyly toward the door frame, in which Sirius was at.

"Oh look, daddy came to see you." She spoke in a neutral tone that neither invited him in nor cast him away. She nodded at the man, replacing the voice for her children with the voice for her husband. "Sirius."