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like ive been thinking about this line from that creme brulee brownie recipe for days like literally where is this woman now like how is she doing

The bean thief

greem beam

trying to get money from your parents after getting into a fight with them:

captainsnoop-deactivated2020041

creating venom without spider-man has created the greatest dynamic between eddie and venom that has ever existed. they aren’t bonding over hating peter parker, they’re bonding over the fact that they’re both complete losers. they’re two losers that love to eat junk food out of the trash and they can combine together to form an eight foot tall space monster.

glutenfreeformyownsanity

And they’re in

Love

whitepeopletwitter

savedby-thebell-jar

I’m hard for her

thatdisasterauthor

Reminds me of my coworker who, whenever she sees a Tesla at a gas station or something, she’ll look over and go “Wow! The new Toyotas look really cool!”

The drivers LOSE THEIR MINDS.

elfwreck

There was a quote in the original Sharks Are Smooth As Hell thread (which I can’t find, at least not with this comment, attributed to raptorific): Apparently for dudes who’ve got a compulsive need to be the smartest person in the room, “someone who’s wrong in a really stupid way who has unshakable confidence that they’re smarter than you” is their kryptonite. You can play dumb on almost any subject and their ego, their staunch belief that the masses are so far below them, will blind them to the fact that you’re just fucking with them, and as long as you don’t admit you’re fucking with them or acknowledge that there’s anything Off about what you’re saying, they won’t be able to stop themselves trying to get you to Respect Their Authority, and they won’t be able to see that will literally never happen.

i-am-mnphnc-grrrl

gymclassieros-deactivated201808

u ever wear fingerless gloves and hold a hot drink and immediately feel like a 1900s victorian urchin taking a break from pickpocketing to gratefully accept a meal from the soup kitchen

holmesianscholar

How did u KNOW

talesfromthecrypts

Putting all my interests on one blog like

solarsyrup

"would you be mad" is the funniest thing to append to hypothetical questions, especially if it doesn't make any sense

solarsyrup

what if granny smith apples were called granny smitt apples? would you be mad?

valtsv

hey what's up youtube, still chained to this rock with eagles pecking out my liver,

von-felden

Booty (licious)

theworsethingsgettheharderifight

Pussy (vicious)

Cock (nutritious)

Tits (malicious)

Bun witch!

Becuase the BOOBAH is important to ME

dearpercocet

All k9 dogs are abused hands down if you post any pro k9 stuff on my dash you’re unfollowed I don’t care if we’ve been mutuals for years, you can claim to be anti-cop or a leftist or whatever but if you post k9 dogs with like “a good doggo! A good boy!” fuck off, if I lose followers over this then good riddance

dearpercocet

cappucino-commie

It’s ALSO worth saying that police dogs serve a significant role in worsening police brutality. A dog trained to attack a human will maim them. A cop looses a police dog on someone, and that person is expected to peacefully cooperate while a dog is trying to tear their limbs off. It is very easy for those massive wounds to get infected. It is an absurd amount of violence. And beyond the initial attack, the fact that a “poor sweet innocent doggo” did this is used to excuse that brutality in court. Especially if the victim, panicking in the moment, lashed out at the dog. As this website has demonstrated many times, majority-white juries have more sympathies for injured dogs than the people of color who are most often victims of police brutality. So they’re not just systemic animal abuse, they’re also a tool for increased police brutality and to excuse