In My “Yes, And-“ Era

| 28 | bisexual | he/him or they/them| Wishlist | Send me asks! | insta: atlasprimedandready | twitter: atlas_primed | Me | Art | Music Tastes | You can call me Atlas or Ace

[atlas-prime]

I think my chest hair is getting thicker

[jame7t]

bald guy wearing a bald cap. Do we know why?

[monkeymage]

Covering blowhole

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

[mikkeneko]

#At this point they're just feeding him prime ministers - via @copiccrow

[depsidase]

[unclefather]

Reblog if you’re a true 90s kid and you remember this tumblr

[just-illegal]

i HAVE [remembers that suicide jokes are bad] no choice but to revolutionize the world

[nociceptrix]

You might've noticed my new tone

[vanity-complex]

And you might have noticed my new tome *casts fireball*

[mildmayfoxe]

1) any stretching is better than no stretching

2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable

3) statistically you will never be the worst person at anything, there is always someone in the world who is worse at stuff than you are

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Day one of trying to resurrect my dead wife and my assistant who for some ungodly reason is the only necromancy expert that agreed to work with me keeps asking things like “where's the lucky body, so to speak” and “are we still in the clandestine promenade to the graveyard with a couple of shovels stage orr” until I snap and tell him I don't need a body for all the advanced reconstruction that I'm pioneering here and I can swear the fucker is giggling behind my back as I type this. The fucking nerve.

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Day two of trying to resurrect my dead wife and my assistant keeps insisting it's “not, strictly speaking, necromancy” and I inform him if he keeps going on like that I'll kill him and bring him back to show him what real necromancy looks like, and he makes doe eyes at me and says he's my necromancy expert. I fear one of us may not survive this. Perhaps multiple times.

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Day one of trying to ✨reconstruct✨ my dead wife and now that I've conceded on the front of dialectics we can finally get some work done. Maybe exact language is really important when you're a ghoul or a vampire or whatever he is but I'm pretty sure being an asshole played the biggest part in this. Anyway, I showed my assistant (henceforth referred to as The Menace) all of the material I've gathered from my wife's journals and interviews with her friends and the more responsive members of her family and maybe going through all of her browser history and how I have been mapping my findings to an experimental neural guide that I can use as basis for growing a brain (something nobody has done this precisely before, not that it's a big deal) and The Menace went “woww you sure had to do a lot of research to figure out your wife”.

I shut myself in the dungeon as a murder-prevention measure and by the time I cooled off enough to reemerge he has plugged all kinds of new data into the neural guide, data that I have already deemed useless, might I add. The Menace has currently locked himself in the dungeon. Why the actual fuck did I think it's a good idea to have a dungeon that locks from the inside.

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Day two of trying to reconstruct my wife and the janky data The Menace plugged into the system seems to have, by some miracle, improved its output’s correlation with the sample data I have of my wife's preferences and ideas as they are presented in her journals by nearly 15%. The Menace still refuses to leave the dungeon even when I inform the bastard I have put away both the medical saw and my poisons kit. Highly unprofessional of him, but what could I expect. I try plugging in some of the other discarded data and correlation drops by 2%.

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Day three of trying to reconstruct my wife and The Menace- well I do need them to understand who you are, don't I- has agreed to exit the dungeon on the condition that I refer to him by name, and also that he has his input in making the logs, which currently consists of him peeking over my shoulder as I type and giving even more smug comments than usual. Are you happy now, Derek? Can we finally get to work? And why wouldn't I use Tumblr it's a perfectly adequate blogging platform-

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Day three of trying to reconstruct my wife, unmonitored log. Derek passed out as soon as I said we're done, so I have something akin to privacy, snoring notwithstanding. Today has been… productive, actually. Although he won't reveal his methods, he's been doing well enough consistently enough with sorting the data for the neural guide that I left that to him and switched my attention to constructing the body. If work continues at this pace we might get to prototype testing in no more than a week. Fast work. Too fast, maybe. Fuck, I don't know what I'm talking about. I should go to sleep.

…I should probably move Derek to the couch at least. If he sleeps in the chair he's bound to have a headache tomorrow.

[nosimpincurly]

[lilyblisslys]

I can see now that “oh fuck I’m gonna soak my jorts” was not an acceptable response to seeing how much pork shoulder I can get for 20$. I’m listening to the grocery shopping community and holding myself accountable.

[godblessthesickos]

World historical loser

[drwiltz-official]

[pangur-and-grim]

he's reeeally pushing his luck

[inaccessiblitykilledchaoticbuggy]

Mx why are they so shaped.

[milanesa42]

Chuletas con puré

[unpeeled-human]

[unpeeled-human]

[nocturnal-necromancer]

Hello?? Can anyone hear me???

[joycomplexx]

by the way it's fine to like sexual content just for the sake of it. "we can't ban porn because other stuff will get banned" "sometimes nude art has value" "the government will classify queer people as sexual" this is all true but it's okay to just like porn. its okay to not want porn to be banned because you like it.

[molabuddy]

its a battle every time i shower

[foxwarrenart]

hope you don't mind op

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

i love tto:u because you can truly never be safe. any of these people could have any number of horrible things happen to them! the ship is fucked and it’s all going to hell!

And none of them can leave

[impossiblepackage]

well. they could. probably wouldn't be a good thing, though

[rincewind87]

This is that thing where the powerful evil villain goes "of course you can leave whenever you like" and theres like...an army in the way.

Except this time its space.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Dracula's wolves were the job of a hack. Some of us use The Void.