i got banned from a canine fitness & structure evaluation facebook group once because somebody posted a dachshund for critique and i commented “too long” and nothing else

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@heybriannamay
i got banned from a canine fitness & structure evaluation facebook group once because somebody posted a dachshund for critique and i commented “too long” and nothing else
hey look at this meme I made for my cats
my cat
i need to put all three of these pictures in a single post. this is significant. this matters. this is why i exist
someone introducing t’challa at an international conference: and now, his majesty, king of wakanda, t’challa!
shuri, somewhere in the crowd: NERD
australia sucks but at least our politicians aren’t treated as celebrities and we can tell them to fuck off at the grocery store
forgive me father for I have sinned in all the coolest and most glamorous ways possible
depressed kids in the media: I don’t wanna go to therapy! I don’t need help! I’m not some specimen for you to dissect!
me, rollin up to my therapist’s office and collapsing in relief: what is UP my homeboy I fuckin missed you,, hope ur ready to hear some Bull Shit that fuckin happened to me this week
families of depressed kids in media: okay sweetie we’ve researched depression for ten hours straight and signed you up for therapy and re-arranged your school schedule to be less stressful
actual parents of depressed kids: look i get you’re sad but someones gotta do the goddamn dishes stop being lazy get up. why didn’t you go to school today, what’s wrong with you, you’re such a burden on this family.
Therapists in the media: *understanding head tilt*
My real live therapist whom I adore: Natalie, that is the DUMBEST thing I’ve ever heard.
Therapists in Media: Lets do some art therapy and be really quiet while we talk about your feelings :)))))) also I’m prescribing you 500 different medicines
My therapist Brian who I love to death: Jack, I think your first problem is you stay up too late looking at memes, so let’s try taking a nap
My real life therapist: Okay, before we start, I found this hilarious video I know you’d love.
Therapist in media: serious face the whole time
My therapist: *laughs awkwardly*
therapists in media: refined, cultured, poised, “I’m afraid I haven’t [heard of the nerdy thing their patient just referenced]”
my old therapist derek, from across the reception area, seeing me for the first time after the summer of 2015: HEY DID YOU SEE AGE OF ULTRON?? IT SUCKED, RIGHT???
my current therapist ian, in our very first appointment: do you like star wars? anxiety is like the force, it can consume you, or you can learn to keep it in balance… you’re my padawan now
green day releasing “back in the usa” and blatantly criticizing donald trump through the music video really makes me think of how this has all happened before with american idiot/george w bush and how this new song (even the title itself) LITERALLY sounds like green day cracking their knuckles and going like “bitch have you guys learned nothing since the last time we did this”
^ ACCURATE
T'Challa: *points at Steve* get this man a shield
T'Challa: *points at Bucky* get this man an arm
T'Challa: *points at Sam* get this man my number ;)
a bro: actually I'm a devil's advocate
satan: *appears from hell* you're not even a lawyer, chad
I love it when I wake up and stretch and something cracks. Makes me feel like a glo-stick
he had it in him all along.
Bucky: I owe you my life.
Sam: No thanks. I've seen it, and I'm not impressed.
Declutter Your Life
I’ve resolved that every Wednesday, I will write a masterpost about self care and living clean and happy lifestyles. Mainly because my blog is devoted to that too, besides being a studyblr, but I hardly ever post original content about it, so hereeee we go. :)
Plan first
Make a list of areas you want to tackle
Or items you want to go through
Set how long you’ll clean
And a little reward for yourself when you’ve reached that goal
Envision what you want your space to look like at the end
Set aside three baskets or areas: one for things to keep, one for things to trash, and one for things to donate/sell
House
There are just some ideas of things to get rid of or pare down. Feel free to add your own. :)
Bedroom
unnecessary pillows on your bed or extra blankets
monsters under your bed
chargers, wires, etc. that go to devices you don’t have anymore or that are broken
old devices, phones, ipods
books you felt kinda eh about while reading them
copies of books or CDs
old notebooks
sticky notes that have lost their stickiness
broken pencils
markers that have dried up
any art supply you don’t use
scrap paper that’s gotten too small
scrap yarn that’s gotten too small
old art projects
unfinished art projects
papers
candles w/o any smell
Scentsy-type stuff w/o any smell
Closet
clothes that don’t fit
all of those clothes you save for your “ugly days”
shoes that hurt that you don’t even like the looks of
underwear with holes (or blood stains - ya feel me, girls?)
socks without a matching pair
socks with holes
bras that are even looking tired
copies of clothes, like multiple white t-shirts
jewelry you don’t wear
childish jewelry
broken jewelry
Bathroom
hygiene products past their expiration date
faded towels
bottles with only a few drops of product left
worn out toothbrushes
hairbands that have lost their elasticity
congealed nail polish
makeup you regret buying
Digital Life
Social Media
Unfollow people, be merciless, make your social media a place of positivity
unfriend toxic people (see the next section)
go through your own posts and delete anything you regret posting
take social media breaks
Computer
upload all of your photos to Google photos or flickr or photobucket or onedrive or whatever, or even a CD, then delete them from your memory
also back up important documents or just things you want to keep to something else and delete them on your computer
go through and sort everything into files
delete any programs you don’t use
Phone
clean out your pictures, upload them to cloud or whatever
delete all of the apps you don’t use or need
go through your contacts and delete the people you don’t want to contact anymore
delete old text message conversations
give yourself a new background too, something clean and simple
Relationships
Get rid of those people who are toxic in your life, mute notifications from them, unfollow them on social media (you can unfollow someone one facebook without unfriending them), don’t answer them often
make an effort to interact with people face-to-face rather than through text or the internet
decide who you want to actively invest your energy in
School
make a study schedule
prioritize your schedule – study the hardest subjects the most
remember that grades are important
also remember that grades aren’t everything
(pls don’t fire me from being a studyblr)
if you can’t get everything you need to do done in 24 hours without sacrificing 8 hours of sleep and a bit of time for yourself, then you’re doing too much
Best tip to stay decluttered: Learn to say no.
ok but why does captain america have a fitness challenge and why is it still being shown in schools. he took experimental super steroids and is currently an international fugitive
Oh my god I’m obsessed with this.