For Your Eyes Only

This was my personal blog- now it's my writing blog!! I post words here.

[hopepunk-humanity]

“I’m almost 50, and here is the best thing I have learned so far: every strange thing you’ve ever been into, every failed hobby or forgotten instrument, everything you have ever learned will come back to you, will serve you when you need it. No love, however brief, is wasted.” @louisethebaker on Twitter

[colonelfitzwilliams]

"He was asking some odd unconnected questions—about her pleasure in being at Hunsford, her love of solitary walks, and her opinion of Mr. and Mrs. Collins's happiness; and that in speaking of Rosings and her not perfectly understanding the house, he seemed to expect that whenever she came into Kent again she would be staying there too. His words seemed to imply it."

DARCY REALLY WAS SITTING THERE FANTASIZING ABOUT HIS AND LIZZY'S TRIPS TO ROSINGS PARK AS A MARRIED COUPLE

[historieofbeafts]

I know I make fun of Pliny the Elder a lot, but I genuinely can’t stop thinking about this approach to taxonomy:

[There is a fish called the tursio, which bears a strong resemblance to the dolphin; it differs from it, however, in a certain air of sadness, and is wanting in its peculiar vivacity.]

Like, imagine someone describing an animal to you, but the only information they’ll provide is that it’s sort of like another animal, but much much sadder.

[hornypineapple]

okay so apparently the word “Tursio” is what people in Pliny’s time called the porpoise. for reference, here is a dolphin:

and here is a porpoise:

anyways long story short Pliny was entirely correct stop bullying him

[sixthrock]

“you ruined a perfectly good dolphin is what you did. look at it, it’s got depression” - Pliny, apparently

[collinear]

TWILIGHT (2008) dir. Catherine Hardwicke

[hi-mynameiselizabeth]

Idk why eddy thought that glitter skin would be scary tbh

[fuckmeyer]

Maria is Mexican but she’s white passing 🙃 colorism and racism at its finest

tbh, smeyer is Very Intimidated by any color darker than her own & it shows

(bc smeyer’s mormonism is rooted in her work, & bc the mormons have a uniquely fucked up relationship with native peoples, this post will focus on just vamps)

let’s look at how she describes other vamps with darker skin colors: the egyptian coven, the amazons, & the mexican coven.

“...the Egyptians all looked so alike, with their midnight hair and olive-toned pallor...” (Breaking Dawn, p.387)

“[The Amazons] wore nothing but animal skins... It wasn’t just their eccentric clothes that made them seem wild but everything about them... I’d never met any vampires less civilized.” (Breaking Dawn, p. 389)

“[Maria, Nettie, & Lucy] had such pale skin, I remember marveling at it. Even the little black-haired girl, whose features were clearly Mexican, was porcelain in the moonlight.” (Eclipse, p. 168)

compare these examples to how bella describes the cullens: perfect. timeless. beautiful. the good guys. bella regularly compliments their pale skin and light eyes, regularly asserts that the cullens, & by extension vampirism itself, embody beauty, power, immortality. vampirism is her end goal for this reason. (edward merely serves as her motivation to get there & her reward at the end.)

for covens of color, that “goodness” and “perfection” come with asterisks: oh, they’re all good despite being feral. oh, they’re all beautiful despite looking the same.

my point is, i’m not surprised maria is written as a white-passing vampire. because i think the whitewashing & assimilation that vampirism brings are smeyer’s way of saying: hey look, guys, anyone can achieve perfection. even people of color can be beautiful vampires. & an unspoken “despite...” hangs off the end.

tl;dr: hell fuckin yeah anon, ur right & u should say it

[jasperwhitcock]

bella didn’t deserve a rich vampire boyfriend i deserve a rich vampire boyfriend. not because i’m a good person but because i like to spend money

[hi-mynameiselizabeth]

So. Idk if we heard the answers to Eddys questions in twilight, but I didn’t need to read all of SMeyers self inserts’ favorite things.

[takemebisurprise]

So I’m listening to the midnight sun audiobook, and can I just say.... the fuck?

[bellaskhakis]

bella swan on her honeymoon

[stromuprisahat]

Carlisle, typing furiously: And now he’s telling me how to feed a human. Can you believe it? I am a DOCTOR, four times his age! Did you see this, Alice? Why didn’t you warn me?!

[bellaskhakis]

smeyer describing men: good looking, attractive or whatever i guess

smeyer describing rosalie: 

[jane-morgendorffer]

[asdfgbhjkfrgfkslehelsfhelfew-de]

[louissunshine]

this isn’t a twilight blog so I’m sure none of you care but since i can’t stop thinking about it, here’s some of the funniest moments from midnight sun

edward having to choke up the piece of pizza like a cat with a hairball

edward being the moody teenager of the family, complete with emmett’s big brother energy and esme’s clear favoritism towards her youngest

when he’s like “oh, i see. bella’s insane. i guess i’ll get her the best doctors then and visit her in the hospital often”

jasper and emmett acting as edward’s side mirrors when the actual mirrors fall off the stolen car

esme making edward mop the floor

edward going to bella’s house for the first time because he thinks a meteorite might kill her

carlisle forcing them to attend the funeral every time they fuck up and kill someone

finding out both charlie and renee have strange minds as well and edward just… never mentioned it?

emmett and jasper not letting edward play board games with them

this happens in twilight too, but bella asking about sex mere hours after their first kiss is still hilarious

edward preparing himself for bella to run screaming when he sparkles

edward’s victorian ass getting horny when he sees bella’s ankle for the first time at prom

smeyer feeling bullied enough to leave out the khaki skirt

[bellasredchevy]

[sadboyedwin]

the way jessica was portrayed by st*phenie m*yer as a stupid rude bitch has never sat right with me. like i know bella wasn’t supposed to Be LikE oThEr GiRlS but cmon , ur individuality complex is showing miss m*yer !!! i LOVE that she was valedictorian in the movies , like yes !! fuck the stereotype m*yer went by

in this house we stan jessica stanley