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[himynameisrecovery]

Another week of sobriety down. Slowly im clocking up the days and I cant lie, its not all a bed of roses. Trust issues and self doubt plague me. Memories of "good" drinking lead me into a false belief that maybe next time it will be different. It wont be different. NOW is different. And that there is the key. Today I have more than ive ever had before and I dont want to lose it. I dont want the nothing I had before, false friendships, money troubles and a constant stream of troubles. Those facts will hopefully keep me sober tomorrow. Good night.

[himynameisrecovery]

Anxiety is a major issue for me in sobriety. I need to constantly remind myself that my past is not who I am today. It played a major part in how I got here but its the change that defines me. I also have to remember that the precious new people in my life only know me as I am today. Anything they learn about my past is not something they have experienced first hand and although the contrast may seem extreme to them, as long as I am honest and genuine I have nothing to fear. I cant change the past and I cant stress what hasnt happened. The goal is progress, not perfection. Today something ugly raised its head from my past and the panic attack I suffered was totally unjustified. Nothing bad happened. I paused. I rang my sponsor. I did everything that I have been told to do and it worked (as it always does). Anxiety is an issue in my sobriety but it no longer controls me.

[himynameisrecovery]

[himynameisrecovery]

Reasons for staying sober...witnessing scenes like this with someone I love...and having the clarity to appreciate it.

[himynameisrecovery]

[himynameisrecovery]

Just for Today

Sometimes in my sobriety im aware of how crazy my head is but still can’t stop it running riot. So Tumblr, you’re gonna get all of my crazy and all of my solutions to the harder days.