ah, I'mtrans (he/him pronouns), and was wondering which words I should use for stuff like "I, me, my"? like, boku is my right? I don't know any ohers though.
Hi! Thank you for your ask. First person pronouns (I, me, mine) can get pretty complex in Japanese, but that gives you much more freedom of expression than English. Let me give you a thorough description of each so you can make an informed decision on which one is right for you. :)
First Person Pronouns in Japanese
In English, we only have one pronoun to express ourselves. “I.” It really doesn’t get any more boring than that.
Maybe that’s why personal pronouns are one of the most interesting aspects of Japanese in my opinion. I actually did a research paper on the history of second-person pronouns (you) in Japanese back in uni.
Why does Japanese have so many ways to say “I?” As I’m sure most of you know, social class and politeness is a fundamental aspect of Japanese culture and language. Different personal pronouns for oneself and others clarify the social standing of each person in the conversation.
I’ll introduce the commonly used ones in order of politeness (most polite to least polite), and then cover the rare ones.
Plural Form: Watakushi-tachi
This is the most formal personal pronoun, and is used in very formal situations, like when you’re speaking to the president of a company or someone very important. In writing, because it has the same kanji as “watashi,” it is commonly written in hiragana.
Gender: neutral (kind of)
Plural Form: Watashi-tachi, watashira
This is the most common personal pronoun.
Like the above watakushi, it conveys a sense of politeness. When used by men, it carries a note of humility and politeness.
However, it is the standard pronoun for women. Because we’re all supposed to be humble at all times? haha
So this is gender neutral and you can use it when you want to be polite.
Plural form: Atashi-tachi, atashira
This is a bastardization of watashi.
It is casual and used exclusively by women. It sounds very feminine. In Japanese tv shows and anime, most male characters cross-dressing as women use “atashi” and it sounds very hyper-feminine. Like, if drag is hyper-feminine dress, “atashi” is the hyper-feminine way of speaking that would go with it.
This comes from the word 家 uchi. The kanji literally means “house,” but it can be used to mean “my family” or “us” in certain contexts. For example:
Japanese: 田中さんは自宅でどんな醤油を使っていますか？うちはやっぱりキッコーマンです。
Romaji: Tanaka-san ha jitaku de donna shouyu wo tsukatte imasu ka? Uchi ha yappari Kikkoman desu.
English: Tanaka-san, what kind of soy sauce do you use at home? We use Kikkoman.
From that use of uchi we get the personal pronoun uchi. This is generally used by young girls, college age and younger. It definitely has a very Valley Girl feel to it and isn’t professional.
Gender: Mostly male, but female in certain contexts
Plural: Boku-tachi, bokura
If you want to rely on tropes to understand what sort of person would use “boku,” think of those harem anime. The nicest, sweetest guy almost always uses “boku” for himself. Contrasted with “ore,” it sounds softer, humbler, and kinder.
It can also sound very slightly childish. Well, not childish. It sounds young. My boss’s boss, who is in his 60′s, uses boku instead of ore and it always strikes me as peculiar because he’s kinda too old to use boku. It makes him sound very humble and kind and the most approachable person ever.
Boku is a good pronoun to use if you want to give off a soft, friendly, safe aura. While it isn’t as polite as watashi, you can still use it in formal settings.
Occasionally, this pronoun is used by women. Specifically, it is used by female singers. It doesn’t matter the band, it doesn’t matter the song–every single female singer uses “boku” in their songs to refer to themselves.
“Why?” you may ask. This is because singers want to connect to their listeners, and “watashi” is too formal and creates a bit of a barrier. “Atashi” and “uchi” are too feminine/childish, and “ore” is way too harsh. So “boku” became the choice for female singers.
Going back to anime tropes, “ore” is used by the “bad boy” or the “I don’t give a shit what you think” boy. Inuyasha, Kurosaki Ichigo (Bleach), and Eren Yeager (Attack on Titan) all use “ore.” This is in contrast to “nicer” characters in the shows that use “boku,” like Miroku (Inuyasha), Ishida Uryuu (Bleach), and Armin Arlert (Attack on Titan).
Ore is considered “rough and tough” because it is very informal. It is used when the people you are talking to are within your inner circle or are beneath you. So you would never use it when talking to, say, your boss’s boss. (You might be able to use it with your boss if you are close with him and you have a friendship though.)
That said, the vast majority of Japanese men I know use ore more than boku. So it wouldn’t be strange if you used ore. Just be aware that it isn’t as polite as you may want to be.
And now for the rare pronouns…
Disclaimer: DON’T USE THESE. Japanese people will think you’re super weird and not in a good way. But you are likely to hear them in anime, dramas, or conversations.
👆 Me outside your door if you use “sessha” to refer to yourself unironically
Literally “Unskilled one,” this is a very humble way to refer to yourself. It was commonly used by samurai, and probably the most famous anime character that uses it is Kenshin from Ruroni Kenshin. DO. NOT. USE. IT. unless you are jokingly pretending to be a samurai for like one sentence.
Though no longer in common usage, there isn’t a Japanese person that isn’t aware of this pronoun because of Natsume Soseki’s famous book Wagahai ha Neko de Aru (I Am a Cat). Written in 1905, it’s about a cat who observes its owners and the uneasy mix of Western culture and Japanese traditions and the aping of Western customs.
“Wagahai” is the pronoun a nobleman or someone of very high rank would use to refer to himself, so the fact that a common house cat is using it to refer it self shows that, even a hundred years ago, everyone thought that cats were self-important.
Plural: 我々 Wareware, 我ら Warera
To be honest, I don’t know a lot about this one. You hear it quite a bit in anime, and it’s always said by some stuffy important old guy. So…it’s probably for stuffy, old, important men to use? Just don’t use it.
Used exclusively by men, the only somewhat main character I’ve seen use this pronoun is King from Seven Deadly Sins. In manga, it is usually written in hiragana or katakana. It has a very “country bumpkin” feel to it. A simple country person who doesn’t know the ways of the world (but not in a bad way).
DO NOT USE THIS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. It is the rudest personal pronoun “ore” with the honorific “sama” attached to it.There is nothing ruder, nothing more “you are the dirt I walk upon” than this. If you use this and you’re not joking, the Japanese people around you will instantly dislike you.
Usually written in hiragana or katakana, “washi” is the way that old people refer to themselves. It’s gender-neutral. Like…idk, 60 and upwards? So don’t use this unless you fall into that age range.
I think I’ve only seen this once, used by a character in Rurouni Kenshin who was quickly killed. It was used by samurai. So unless YOU are a samurai from 150 years ago, don’t use it. It’s so low frequency that if you used it as a joke I doubt Japanese people would understand. But hey. You learned a cool new word.
I hope that this post helps you choose the pronoun that fits you best. ♡
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