Hive Bus Driver

@hivebusdriver

Mother of many seeking to cover all of the land with her family. Provides quick and easy transportation for those who have the stomach. (TW: Unreality, Bugs)

23 posts

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I HAVE FOUND A BUS I CAN CALL MY OWN. MY CHILDREN AND I ARE VERY EXCITED. NEED YE TRANSPORTATION? JUST ASK!

#BUSBLR #INSECTS #BUGS #UNREALITY #tw: insects #HIVEBUSDRIVER

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

whatever people are doing on tiktok will never compare to the people roleplaying osha, handing mangoes to everyone they see in the notes of a popular post, drawing spamton angst and then affectionately referring to tumblr as their wonderful, pest infested condemned home

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

remember how we all worshipped the eeby deeby elevator for like a week

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THE BUS DRIVERS

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

HELLO???????

im so sorry about this

chosenbusdriver

hello.

busdriverwithagun

So. Funny thing.

We’re not all bus drivers. Some of us are just sapient buses.

HELLO. CHILDREN, GO GREET THE UNINITIATED.

busdriverwithagun

WAIT NO THEY HAVEN’T LEARNED ABOUT THE TIME TRAVELLER YET!

*Deafening cicada noises*

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

whatever people are doing on tiktok will never compare to the people roleplaying osha, handing mangoes to everyone they see in the notes of a popular post, drawing spamton angst and then affectionately referring to tumblr as their wonderful, pest infested condemned home

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

remember how we all worshipped the eeby deeby elevator for like a week

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THE BUS DRIVERS

humanwheatleyslefttoenail

HELLO???????

im so sorry about this

chosenbusdriver

hello.

busdriverwithagun

So. Funny thing.

We’re not all bus drivers. Some of us are just sapient buses.

HELLO. CHILDREN, GO GREET THE UNINITIATED.

It'd sure be easier to sleep if the cicadas would shut the fuck up.

I mean, cicadas don't usually sound like that, but what the fuck? Might as well pretend that's what they are.

FUCK YOU MY CHILDREN HAVE BEAUTIFUL SINGING VOICES

*hands you a bunch of candycorns inside a plastic pumpkin basket* happy not-halloween-yet, have a treat!

THANK YOU, KIND STRANGER! CHILDREN, TONIGHT YOU FEAST!

[*She yeets the basket into her bus.*]

princebusdriver

Okay are you SURE you don't need the emotional support cicadas? You seem to be in a bad way.

--@hivebusdriver

I'M FINE.

Oh you’re fine with the emotional support cicadas?

Okay if you say so have fun kids!

[*Drives off, leaving one metric fuckton of cicadas behind alongside a VHS copy of Shark Tale*]

princebusdriver

GET BACK HERE I DON'T WANT YOUR STUPID CICADAS.

[*No response.*]

[*The cicadas have begun watching Shark Tale.*]

princebusdriver

Okay are you SURE you don't need the emotional support cicadas? You seem to be in a bad way.

--@hivebusdriver

I'M FINE.

Oh you’re fine with the emotional support cicadas?

Okay if you say so have fun kids!

[*Drives off, leaving one metric fuckton of cicadas behind alongside a VHS copy of Shark Tale*]

princebusdriver

Are you alright, royal brat? Do you need emotional support cicadas?

--@hivebusdriver

No. Absolutely not.

Is that referring to the being alright, or the emotional support cicadas? To elaborate, I am actually just trying to use this as an excuse have someone else babysit while I go out to have some fun with friends. And by friends I actually mean myself because it is difficult to find people who want to hang out with you when you have bladed limbs.

princebusdriver

It's for the cicadas. I am perfectly fine.

Uh... You don’t really seem like it, but alright!

princebusdriver

Are you alright, royal brat? Do you need emotional support cicadas?

--@hivebusdriver

No. Absolutely not.

Is that referring to the being alright, or the emotional support cicadas? To elaborate, I am actually just trying to use this as an excuse have someone else babysit while I go out to have some fun with friends. And by friends I actually mean myself because it is difficult to find people who want to hang out with you when you have bladed limbs.

I love to assert the pedestrian right-of-way. What the fuck are you going to do? Murder me with your vehicle? Lol

*hits you with my bus*

*also hits them with my bus*

*hits you with my bus*

What is a “MILF?”

human-bus-driver

a milf is a moonwalking iguana liking fish

Oh okay

FUCK WRONG BLOG

human-bus-driver

also to clarify it is a fish that likes moonwalking iguana not the other way around

Oh, okay. Do they taste good cooked? Because if so my children and I would probably like to eat some hot MILFs.

evil-osha-employee-blackbox

I am sorry that somebody threw soup at you.

*Gives you a bucket of cicadas*

Okay bye please be nice to my children!

... They die very soon what am I supposed to do with them....?

I dunno bye lmao!

*Runs back to my bus before you can hand them back*

*Clips a stop sign while driving away*

What is a “MILF?”

human-bus-driver

a milf is a moonwalking iguana liking fish

Oh okay

FUCK WRONG BLOG

What is a “MILF?”

HUH!? A FINE LAYER OF OBSCURING MIST SURROUNDS OUR VEHICLE? REJOICCCCCCCCEEEEEEE CHILDREN! BREATH IN THE MOIST AIR! ACCEPT IT AS A COOL BLANKET OF DAMP SAFETY!

[*Flops onto the ground and just fuckin lays there, for like, at least an hour, content cicada noises radiating from the area all the while*]

OKAY, THAT IS ENOUGH REJOICING, CHILDREN. WE MUST LEAVE, AND CONTINUE SPREADING OUR INFLUENCE ACROSS THIS WOEFULLY UNCORRUPTED LAND.

...

......

UH... CHILDREN, WE MAY HAVE GOTTEN LOST.

PLEASE DO NOT CRY THERE ARE WORSE PLACES TO GET LOST. LIKE THE MIDDLE OF THAT HUMAN VILLAGE THAT ATTEMPTED TO SET US ON FIRE THAT ONE TIME WASN'T THAT EXCITING?

[*Discontented cicada noises radiate throughout the area*]

--@hivebusdriver

oh, goodness- bugs- well. who am i to not offer folks in need a helping hand, and that means anyone... [a sort of speaker like thing pops out of the side of my bus as i drive up.] HELLO!! ARE YOU LOST

OH, YES! LOOK, MY CHILDREN ARE CRYING, THEY NEVER KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THEMSELVES IN THESE SORTS OF SITUATIONS!

[*A clawed, insectoid limb pokes out of the vaguely humanoid figure’s robes to point at the cicadas that litter the area. The cicadas show no outward signs of emotion.*]

IF YOU CAN LEAD US OUT OF THIS FOG, MY CHILDREN AND I WILL BE VERY GRATEFUL TO YOU, YOU WILL HAVE ACCESS TO OUR BUS’ VIP SEAT AND BE SPARED WHEN WE REGAIN OUR STRENGTH AND RECLAIM THE EARTH, THE CHITINOUS SHELLS OF BILLIONS UPON BILLIONS OF MY LITTLE ONES BLOTTING OUT THE WRETCHED STAIN OF THE SUN FROM THE SKY AS WE TAKE THIS WORLD INTO OUR CLAWED EMBRACE!

THANK YOU KINDLY! ૂི•̮͡• ૂ ྀ

...of course! just let me know when you're ready, and follow my bus as close as you can! [fog seems a bit worried, eyes darting around and looking at the thickening fog surrounding them.] just hurry, i fear that if we stall too long- well. hurry, alright?

ALRIGHT! CHILDREN, GET IN THE BUS.

[*The cicadas swarm into their bus, and the odd figure enters behind them.*]

OKAY, READY!

[lume seems relieved as they start to drive.]

so how did you manage to get so many cicadas??

I MADE THEM! THEY ARE MY CHILDREN! v_v

...alright. do you remember how you got here? in the fog, i mean.

Nope! I was just out on a drive through the unexplored forest with my children, and then we ended up here!

horrorbusdriver

[A slightly rusted bus approaches, the chirping of cicadas

Oh, another bus! how do you do!? I smell something... strange about you. Not in the way of that royal brat's bus, but a good strange! like the beauteous scent of decaying meat before my fly children would gorge themselves upon it! Oh, how I wish I could return to the days before those damnable mages in their ivory towers sealed my children and I away! I've only cicadas now, as much as I still love them so.

Oh, I got myself off on a tangent there, didn't I? I'm very sorry, I can fall into reminiscence quite easily!

--@hivebusdriver

You smell like rot.

What do you want?

“Oh, I was just wondering if you may happen to be yet another being of immense power like myself, brought low by craven mortals seeking to limit our might?”

librarianbusdriver

Perhaps I will adopt a typing quirk. To add to my otherwise plain way of typing.

I’ve been there, done that, and it really just made my posts harder to read!

librarianbusdriver

Hm. I will abandon it, then, unless someone asks me to bring it back.

[OOC] Oh no, I wasn’t encouraging you to abandon it, I just saw an opportunity to say something kind of humorous regarding the fact that Mother no longer types in all caps lmao

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