@holysmokesitsboo - Tumblr Blog

crucifrick

women being openly sexual online doesn't mean you can be a fucking weirdo in their dms

messsssmer

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

fireknightqueelign

thy mother

messsssmer

Art thou for fucking real

tidesandtwilight

do you wanna come over and be weird with me

oneheadtoanother

peachesmendes-deactivated201903

“don’t double text”

i will deadass send you ten messages in a row on completely different topics

pansyfemme

one moment ☝️ *pauses the blowjob to start violently coughing up blood*

wingedluminarychaos

That "I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum" whimper that makes you pin her down and fuck her harder

decad3ntwh1spers

little miss provokes you into fucking her the roughest you ever have

decaying-dolls

bitches be like “all bodies r beautiful <3” and then look in the mirror and start crying uncontrollably anyways i’m bitches

wingkink

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

theconcealedweapon

maarvarq

Always bear in mind that there is absolutely no legitimate evidence that Luigi was actually the one who killed the insurance company guy.

theconcealedweapon

Of course he wasn't. He was at a party with me that day.

tiny-space-whale

No but like literally, actually. All bits aside.

He didn't do it.

The cops very clearly planted evidence on him because they had to make an arrest because all eyes were on them and whoever actually did the deed was making them look stupid.

Why would the real killer hero have kept the weapon on his person and traveled two states over while carrying it and a manifesto in his bag, conveniently turning the crime into a federal matter? The same guy whose bag they found in a park, filled with monopoly money? Why did the police turn off their bodycams, take Luigi's stuff, drive a block away, turn their bodycams back on, go back into the restaurant, and then arrest him?

From the moment of his arrest, even left-of-center media has been presuming his guilt without examining anything (e.g. calling him "the killer" instead of "alleged" or "accused") and then when I say he didn't do it, the nearest person chimes in with some quip that tells me they think he did do it but should go free anyway. Don't get me wrong, I would have the same attitude if he had done it. But he didn't. It makes me feel like the only sane person in the world, even among my staunchly leftist friends.

noknowshame

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that

newlyy

Not that I think all marriages are doomed but when deciding who to marry you should ask yourself “is this someone I’d want to divorce?” As in, is this someone I believe would be mature and fair, even when they’re upset and don’t particularly like me at the moment. Is this someone I could continue to trust while going through an adversarial process? And if the answer is no, don’t marry them.