Meet the faces of the “I’m Sorry” campaign, a group of Christians who go to Chicago’s pride celebrations every year to apologize for their past hateful actions against LGBT people. The group started in 2010 and has since moved to other cities across the world. This is what love looks like. (via the Advocate)
Look it’s a little self-serving and feel-good for the Christians in question, I’m sure, but you have no idea how healing this can be for LGBT Christian folks. Even if they grew up in a welcoming tradition. Especially if they did not.
“The title came from our drummer, Spencer Smith—we were high and he was like, “Yeah, I don’t know what time it is but it feels like nine in the afternoon.” And we just thought that was hilarious, and after cracking up for 20 minutes that became the hook for this song.” - Brendon Urie
pretty odd came out when i was 14, in 8th grade. i was in the middle of the worst years of my life, too far in but not far out enough to see the light at the end of the tunnel. depression slowly descended upon me and swallowed me whole as my friends vanished. i got skin cancer and i thought that god sent the cancer to kill me because i liked girls. i began self harming.
music is what got me through those years. especially fall out boy and panic. infinity on high made me fall in love with fob. then i fell in love with everything else they had done. i cried when my mom refused to let me see them in a concert because it was on a school night. i wore my clandestine industries shirt constantly.
i didn’t get into panic right away. i do remember watching the IWSNT video for the first time because it kept popping up in my related videos on youtube as i watched fall out boy music videos over and over and over. i didn’t like the song at first. that was in 2007 i think. beginning of 2008 i came to my senses and became obsessed overnight.
this all happened probably a month or two before pretty odd came out. i was so, so hyped for the new album. the nine in the afternoon video came out and along with much of the fandom, i was simultaneously very confused but also loving it. the radical stylistic change that pretty odd brought was completely unexpected to us. they got a lot of shit. i even gave them shit in the beginning when i first listened to the album on itunes. “they’re trying too hard to sound like the beatles,” i complained, along with many others.
but once i looked more closely, pored over my cd lyric booklet, admired the art, and realized hippie ryan was still beautiful, i realized that pretty odd is a fucking gem.
at the time i was in a girl scout troop that basically consisted of me, two of my worst bullies, and girls who had once been my friends but now sided with the bullies and thought i was weird. shortly after pretty odd came out we had a trip somewhere, and one girl brought pretty odd to play in the car. we split up into 2 cars and i wanted to be in that car so i could listen to the cd, but the girls in that car didn’t want me to sit with them and made me go to the other car. i leaned against the window and cried. one of the bully bitches noticed, and then the troop leader, and they moved me to the other car and everyone apologized. apology not accepted. but i got to listen to pretty odd and smiled again. if that isn’t a representation of my life back then + pretty odd’s impact, i don’t know what is.
i saw a post on lj or somewhere years and years ago where someone was describing why pretty odd is so magical. i could have sworn i saved it, but can’t find it anywhere now. but the gist of it is this:
pretty odd is just pure joy and happiness and shameless fun. and it is so contagious. no matter what mood you’re in, you can listen to it and at least one of the songs will bring a smile to your face. it is pure happiness in music form. the songs, you can feel exactly how panic was feeling at the time - that sense of unity and friendship, of love and laughter, of dancing in the rain with flowers in your hair. even if a lot of fans didn’t like it, you can’t deny the energy and passion that radiates from that album. it’s a rainbow, it’s the sun, the way your eyes twinkle when you laugh. that feeling is in every word, every beat, every chord in that album.
i saw panic for the first time on june 14, 2008. i will always remember that date because at that time, it was the best night of my entire life. i went with my new best friend and saw other queer girls for the first time ever. we saw phantom planet, the hush sound, and motion city soundtrack, if i remember correctly. i wore shitty purple extensions in my hair. motion city soundtrack’s bass was too loud and i could feel it vibrating in my heart.
it was the last night of the honda civic tour. the band’s energy and excitement was palpable. so contagious. it was so fucking fun and i sang my heart out and smiled and laughed the whole time. brendon told us his arm hurt from getting a new tattoo earlier that day. every time i see the piano keys surrounded by flowers, it brings me back to that night. a night of hope, of love, of realizing there were things in life worth living for. that night changed my life.
the camaraderie of the pretty odd era was incredible. i checked patdonline every day to check for news and new photos, and spent hours poring over the old ones and saving my favorites to my ipod. i remember the day the ‘ryden exists’ airport photos came out and everyone lost their shit. i started writing fic. that summer, i wrote on SATD - which was being updated every few hours at that point, it was so active, RIP - every day, until i finished my fic and it ended up being about 260 pages. that was my proudest achievement thus far. i loved writing but could never finish anything. but posting each chapter on lj, and getting so many kind comments and encouragements from strangers that soon became friends, kept me going, motivated me to get out of bed in the morning. those kind words are what got me through that period of time. and i am so grateful to everyone who read and commented on that story.
10 years later... i am 24, a college graduate, have a ! tattoo on my foot, and am working full time and trying to figure out this whole adulting thing. sometimes i still feel like the girl crying silently against the car window, wanting more than anything to get out. but sometimes i go back and listen to pretty odd, and remember the hope and love and everything that surrounded it, and i smile again.
thank you boys, for your bravery and creativity and love that you poured into this album. i owe ya.
