𝖯𝖺𝗋𝗍 10: 𝖶𝗂𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖠𝖻𝗅𝖾
I wish you could know me, and I wish I could know you much more sometimes. I'll say "I love you" and mean it this time, say "I'm sorry", for everything else. If we found a way to the other side, I'd be willing and able. If you're willing, I'm able.
Nine people gathered in the largest parlor of Wayne Manor. Two of the adults argued while the rest sat awkward in mourning while nursing ceramic cups in their palms as the tea subtly went cold.
There were eight days left until Christmas and the tenth person was missing.
For about a month, no one could get a hold of you.
You weren’t returning their calls or messaging anyone back.
They were worried and freaking out.
“This is your fault!” Bruce and Clark shouted at each other.
If the Justice league thought Batman and Superman were being passive aggressive before, they were straight up aggressive now.
“If it weren’t for you showing up at the Gala being petty and, quite frankly, immature, then those photos and articles wouldn’t have existed in the first place! You made this a bigger issue to clean up!” Bruce was furious. Clark should have kept his nosey questions to himself instead of making a public spectacle of their situation. That way, you would have been left alone by the press and they wouldn’t have to deal with CPS calls and new unsavory rumors every other week.
“Well if you have been there for (Name) in the first place, then none of this would have happened!” Clark was ashamed, remorseful, and deeply guilty for his actions. He was so over Bruce’s lack of taking action that he thought by publicly accusing him might push him in the right direction. To encourage him to reach out to you and finally stitch up the wound.
But instead, he made things so much worse. He saw the photos and gossip articles.
(Name) Wayne Spotted Out for a Morning Jog.
(Name) Wayne Won’t Talk About Their Family. Possible Fallout?
The Middle Wayne Tries to Live a Simple Life Away in Los Angeles. What Does This Say About Gotham?
(Name) Wayne Out for Brunch With Possible Throuple?
The lies, speculation, and blatant stalking enraged him.
In the photos where your eyes would meet the lens of the camera, you looked like a deer in headlights. You looked horrified.
What were you feeling? Were you annoyed? Scared? Surprised?
Was this why you weren’t answering him? Why you haven’t called him, or Lois, or Jon?
Did you know? Were you resentful?
Clark would be if he was in your situation. He wouldn’t forgive himself.
He doesn’t forgive himself.
The back ‘n forth and pointing fingers were getting none of them anywhere. They could assign blame to someone all day, but that rarely ever solved the actual problem.
Being at each other’s throats wasn’t going to find you any quicker than them running through mud.
Out of all the people gathered in the parlor, Jon was the most distraught about your disappearance.
He was the one who grew closest to you.
Sure, the time he spent with you was short, only a few months, but being with you for nearly every waking hour felt like he was with you for a lifetime. He didn’t know why you were staying with his family during the summer and he didn’t ask any questions. He was just excited to have someone around while his parents were at work. Playing video games by yourself was only entertaining the first couple times, the rest is just kinda sad.
And then he learned how cool you were.
Solo traveling across the United States was unimaginable to him. The country is huge! Seriously! That’s so many miles!
From a super’s perspective, humans were incredible. They can endure a lot of physical stress along with mental barriers, and because of their drive, determination, and sheer willpower, they can accomplish anything. That’s so much more impressive than being born with superpowers, magic, turning meta, or having any kind of special artifact that allows you to manipulate or create.
They basically lived life on easy mode, while humans had grit and adaptability. They would go down fighting with their last breath if they had to.
But you,specifically, were outstanding.
You weren’t a Bat, but in your own right. You were a warrior. You’ve worked hard to make it where you’ve been. From your art to the distances you could run. Even your recovery during the summer.
You’ve worked hard for all your accomplishments and goals.
You even helped him achieve his own and taught him how to fly.
He grew to see you as his older sibling almost, like Conner. And he’d hope to see you again soon. He missed you.
So, to make up for not being able to see your face like he had, he settled for hearing your voice instead.
He told you about the topics he was covering in 5th grade and how he was progressing with flying. He was working on controlling how high and fast he could go, and smoothing out the transitions.
But when you stopped calling him and stopping answering his calls, his heart broke into a million little pieces.
He didn’t understand the sudden change. He didn’t know if something happened to you or if you decided you just didn’t like him anymore.
You stopped talking to all of them. You left them all on delivered.
You promised you’d come back for Christmas after the semester.
But that was months ago and you’ve gone radio silent for weeks now.
Jon thought about all the times he spent with you out in the backyard and joining you during your physical therapy. He thought about the times you joined them on Friday Family Game Nights. How you taught him to fly and how they celebrated your intern acceptance in California.
He thought those moments meant something.
He cried for hours in his bedroom from the heaviness his super strength couldn’t lift off his heart.
Leave to the eldest sibling to take charge when things start going nowhere.
Dick set his cold tea down on the closest side table to his left before standing from the couch and directing his frustration towards Bruce and Clark.
“Yelling at each other isn’t going to help find (name)!”
The two men ceased their less than civil disagreement to look at the mediator. A void of silence filled the room.
Dick took a breath before speaking again, this time to the whole room.
“We are all, in some way, to blame for this—except for you, Lois and Jon. I’m sorry you’re caught in the crossfire. But the rest of us all equally deserve blame. If it weren’t for us, (name) wouldn’t have left. But if it weren’t for Clark, those photos and articles wouldn’t have circulated. Even we knew (name) has never been a public figure. It likely freaked them out and caused them to run away again,” he said in reference to the latest news story about how you’ve seemed to have vanished from Los Angeles.
“So,” Dick said finally. “How are we going to find them?”
“Where do we even start?” Damian joined. “They’re a wild card. They could be anywhere by now.”
Jason looked over the couch he leaned on at Tim, “Any ideas out your case file baby bird?”
Tim shook his head, “I found a list of all the places they’ve always wanted to go to in their desk drawer, but that doesn’t narrow it down considering there’s a lot of destinations. Some of which are international.”
“(Name) was doing research for backpacking the Triple Crown before they left for California,” Jon piped up from where he cuddled next to his mom on a separate couch.
“Maybe they started one of those trails?”
“Possibly. But which one should they have started with?” Clark looked at Bruce, he was willing to set aside his pointed finger in effort to achieve the main and most important objective: finding you.
Bruce grunted and met Clark’s baby blues.
“The PCT would start in Southern California at the Mexico border. Heading northbound would be easier than starting from British Columbia and traveling south. Assuming they'd adequately prepared; had all the gear, plus food, and planned any additional stays in hostels and hotels, they could’ve started the trail the day the semester ended since Campo is only three hours away. On average, it takes about five months to complete the hike with California taking the longest part to complete. Since the semester ended a little over a week ago, we could safely say that (name) would likely still be in California. If we go now, we could intersect with them in Julian for their resupply.”
“While the thought is sweet and all, that won’t be necessary.”
Every head jolted to the entryway towards the voice no one was expecting. The room went still.
There you stood, at the threshold, wearing a Yosemite sweatshirt and an awkward smile on your lips.
“Sorry I’m late. There was traffic.”
Within a second, a mass aggressively wrapped itself around your middle and nearly knocked you over from the hug.
“You’re here! You’re here! You came back!” Jon cheered, misty-eyed. For a second, you saw the parallels between this moment and when Clark rescued you all those months ago.
But this wasn’t fear of the unknown.
Lois and Clark joined the hug shortly after. You closed your eyes and for a moment, you were back in that suburban home in Metropolis.
But it was only for a moment.
When you opened your eyes to look past your group, you met with six other pairs staring awkwardly back at you.
This was the reunion you were dreading. Or was this a first meeting?
Either way, it was an awkward but necessary meeting.
As the warmth of the group hug fell away, the bodies that surrounded you shifted to standing beside you. Once again, the room fell silent.
“We’ve made a lot of mistakes.” Bruce spoke first.
“Yeah,” you agreed. “You have.”
After everything they’ve done? After everything they didn’t do?
Bruce and the rest of them look as though you shot them personally.
“To start over would imply there was a beginning in the first place. And while I’m grateful for you taking me in and providing me with opportunities rare for others, there were a lot of things none of you could have done for me. When my parents were killed, I didn’t need justice or vengeance. I didn’t need an outlet for anger. I needed support and compassion. I needed a family. I needed to not be alone. And that wasn’t something you could do. These past months have shown me a lot. I’ve got to meet a lot of amazing people and I’ve learned a lot about myself as well. Gotham isn’t my home. It hasn’t been for a long time,” you looked over your shoulder at Clark. “But neither is Metropolis.”
Diana was right. Deciding to leave was a hard decision, but choosing to stay is just as difficult. And making the right choice will feel like we’re dying for a while. But eventually, when the debris from the catalyst settles, and you look out at all the destruction, you can either mourn for what was lost or look towards the future with the hope of building something new. Something better and stronger.
You looked back at Bruce.
“Maybe one day I might feel differently. But for the time being, I think I need to find my own way. I’ve felt more at home under the stars than I have anywhere else, and I think I’d like to keep chasing them. At least, for a while. Our relationship would need to take a lot of time and effort into understanding each other and finding middle ground. I’m still incredibly hurt, and angry, and betrayed from everything, but I don’t want to keep feeling this way. Maybe this is a case where we have to let each other go…but, if you’re willing, I’d like to introduce myself and learn more about each of you.”
You let the offer hang in the air and stepped forward with your hand extending towards Bruce, a friendly smile on your lips.
“Hi, I’m (name) (last name).”
Wayne was not your name. It was one you were associated with, and one recognized in court, but it was not yours.
You knew who you were. You were just too lost to see it clearly.
You might need to give Ma Kent another call.
Bruce gazed upon your face for the first time in a long time.
It’s been over seven months. And while he knew your name, he did not know you.
He was wrong to assume that by trying to take you under his cape would help ease your pain from the murder of your parents. He was wrong to assume that would give you a sense of purpose. You were nothing like him, and nothing like his other birds.
You found your own way. Your own meaning. One not defined by himself and he couldn’t be more blown away by you.
Did he have any right for that pride?
Relationships were always complicated for Bruce. He didn’t know where being a leader and where being a father began or ended. Where his sons stopped being his sons and became his partners.
It was a thin and fragile line that never stayed in one place for very long.
Bruce held so much regret in his heart from not giving you the full extent of everything you deserved, and he wanted desperately to make it up to you.
Shower you in gifts, spend time with you, do anything you’d request.
But he knew he couldn’t hold on to the version of you he was used to, the one he brought in years ago.
You were no longer that person. You haven’t been for a while.
And he’d like to know you. The real you, this time.
Bruce returned your smile and accepted your handshake, hoping one day it would become a warmer and less formal greeting.
“Bruce Wayne. It’s good to meet you (Name).”
Upon returning to Gotham and after talking to Bruce and the others, you’ve made a public appearance for the press and finally gave a statement about the
Obviously, you couldn’t outright tell them everything–secret identities and all that–but you could tell them your truth.
“Every family has their drama. They fight, there's arguments, and they don’t always see eye to eye. The Waynes are good people. They’ve done a lot of good for the city and have given me unbelievable opportunities by bringing me in. For that, I’m forever grateful. But I am my own individual with plans and aspirations. And traveling is my number one. I’m sorry for not making it public, but I prefer my personal life to remain personal and not in the tabloids. The speculation and CPS calls were unfair and unbecoming, I’d expect better maturity from adults considering you set the example for my generation and the younger generations ahead. My family isn’t perfect, but I highly doubt yours is any better. Imperfection is not a flaw; it’s a fundamental element in what it means to be human. And I love my family, not despite our flaws, but because of them. We make mistakes, we hurt each other’s feelings sometimes, but we make an effort and work towards being better people to each other and ourselves.”
That was the official statement. And it seemed to work for the most part.
There will always be negative neigh-sayers who hold one-sided hatred for people whose lives will never impact our own in a way that matters. But for the rest, they took your statement to heart and left you and the Waynes alone, with even a few who apologized via Twitter.
But you weren’t done quite yet. You still had a lot of places you wanted to venture off too. There were still many places to draw on paper, and many people to meet for the first time.
So, when New Years came, you packed your car and headed on the road once again. But this time, you answered the calls from not just Lois, Clark, and Jon, but from Bruce and the others as well. It was gonna take a while, and sometimes you might get lost in the dark, but the sun will always rise the next day to show you the possibilities of tomorrow. Your relationship will never be the same as it was, or how you’d hope it’d be like in the beginning, but with the right efforts on both sides, maybe something new will forge instead.
Your heart rate still elevates at the flash and click of a camera, but you’ve managed to not flinch so hard around it.
Besides, you only need to tolerate it for a little while. Just during public events, such as this.
You’ve spent a year on the road traveling across the country and drawing iconic destinations, along with portraits of the people you’ve met along the way. And now, you were showcasing your first gallery. Right here in Gotham City.
The turn out was more than you expected. You didn’t realize just how many people would be interested in touring your works. To say you were a little nervous was an understatement. Although, the snippets of conversation of patrons marveling at your work and praising your artistry did give you a bit of an ego boost.
The contrast between the open roads and the confined showroom (even if it was on the bigger end) made you feel ever so claustrophobic. You’re not sure you’ll ever feel relaxed in such a crowded space. Not to mention the lifestyle differences between you and the socialites of Gotham. Wool socks and flannels were way more comfier than formal attire.
Yup, you definitely preferred your stars over vaulted marble ceilings. They were a luxury many tended to forget about.
“Well, isn’t this a rare sight! (Name) (Last name) back in Gotham? I was sure you’d be off to Italy by now?”
You snickered at the joke and turned to face the voice behind you.
Bruce stood not far and greeted you with a smile.
“It’s good to see you again. You’ve changed.”
It was true, you have matured a lot during the year you’ve been away. Not just in age or your face, but in perspective too.
“I sure hope I did. Staying the same doesn’t offer much growth, does it?”
“No,” the man wistfully agreed. “It doesn’t.”
While the two of you haven’t seen much of each other’s faces over the past twelve months, you’ve become familiar with his voice through your phone’s speaker. You won’t lie, it was just as awkward talking with the bats on the phone as it was speaking to them in person. But at least everyone was trying, right?
The first few calls felt more like confessionals than a conversation. You would stay quiet while Bruce, Alfred, and the guys would spill everything they held or were trying to understand what they were feeling. And you would return the same.
It felt good to finally get the lingering weight off your chest.
And when all of you finally stripped bare of your guards, your personalities started to shine through. You learned about each of their lives before the Bat and how they changed afterwards. How they found meaning in their mission. What they hoped would become of them and how they wished to impact the communities. They told you about their relationship with each other, how they didn’t always get along and how sometimes they still fight with each other. But in the end, they always find a way to make it up, even if it takes a while.
And you would tell them about your life. Your goals and aspirations. You would tell them what interning at the Getty was like and how you met a lot of diverse people, both in Los Angeles and around the country. How just a single conversation would shift your outlook on the world and how a lot of people have similar, yet different perspectives.
Humanity was so fascinating like that.
“Are the birds around?” You asked Bruce.
“They are, I’m sure they’ll come find you after they’ve talked to anyone who’ll listen ears off about how great and talented you are.”
One day you’ll get over the embarrassment, but that won’t be tonight.
An arm slung around your shoulders and drew you closer to someone’s side in a hug.
“What? We can’t brag about (Name) at their first gallery showing? Where’s the fun in that?” Jason dramatically sighed.
“(Name), I request that you come to Gotham Academy and give a workshop to the art club. They could use your expertise to improve their elementary understanding of atmospheric perspective and composition.”
“Damian, their eleven.” Tim gave his younger brother a pointed look.
“Is that supposed to be an excuse?"
It was cute that Damian picked up art and joined his school’s club while you were away. In one of his calls, and he asked this to remain confidential, but he picked up the hobby to see what you saw in it. Translation: he wanted to feel closer to you.
And Tim picked his hobby in photography back up too. It warmed your heart, the impact you were starting to have on your younger brothers.
You were starting to feel like you actually belonged.
“Hey, hey! Look who I found at the entrance!” Dick entered the conversation with three more people who made the smile on your face grow wider. You went in for a group hug.
“I’m so glad you guys could make it!” It was good to see Lois, Clark, and Jon again after such a long time.
“We wouldn’t miss it for the world, honey.” Lois kissed your cheek.
“It’s a good opportunity for a family reunion,” Clark added.
It was unexpected how the dynamic formed. But in a way, you became the bridge between the Waynes and the Lane-Kents. Perhaps not from the typical marriage expectation, but one born from love either way.
They all loved you as you’ve grown to love every one of them.
It was wonderful how much a year could change a person. How it can change people.
For so long, you thought you were destined to be alone and forgotten. That you were just a spec of dust in the ever expanding cosmos. Small and insignificant. But truly, you held an entire galaxy inside you. And when combined with your family, they became your universe.
Through the joy and laughter of the moment you turned your head and looked beyond the crowd at your favorite display of the whole gallery, a lightness in your chest.
You had over two hundred and fifty works presented tonight, some large, some relatively medium, and a majority of them on the smaller scales from your first travel sketchbook. If you didn’t know better, this could have been a retrospective exhibit of your entire life’s work. But you were very much alive and just getting started.
There, along the main installation wall at the center of the room, were ten works spaced evenly at a sixty inch center.
Throughout the gallery, there was a mixture of landscapes and portraits of people you’ve interviewed from your time on the road, both from this past year and from the initial two weeks through seven months you started your journey.
Even Linda was on display, just like she predicted.
But the ten you loved the most were all relatively recent and larger pieces. Made bigger from the pages of your sketchbook.
Ten portrait interviews. One for each member of your collective family.
a/n: Alrighty folks, show's over! I'm a sucker for a good ending and if you let me think long enough on a word document, I'll spill my entire soul out, which is at it's essence is forged in hope. I love a story with character growth and I want to make more longer fics with plots and explore different genres as well. I want to see how far I can go and how I can improve my writing. I might revisit this fic at a later date to add more chapters and add even more details, but we'll see! I have a lot of fic ideas in my notebook and The Gotham City Run Club fics to finish.
Everyone, once again thank Noah Kahan for releasing The Great Divide, for which I would not have written my own. And please for the love of all things divine listen to the album!! I'm gnawing at the bars of my enclosure, it's so good!! And thank you for reading and LMK your thoughts, I really do appreciate it!
𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖦𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍 𝖣𝗂𝗏𝗂𝖽𝖾: 𝖠 𝖬𝖺𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍
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