Not to get weird about Anti-Noah or anything about but here’s my two cents about the whole “should he be evil?”-thing.
Canon!Noah was supposed to be a villain, but the script changed and he turned into a neutral-leaning-towards-good guy role. He likes to stay back, observe and think through his next actions. He often tries to talk his way through problems, whether he’s trying to do for good for someone or bad for someone.
So I suggest, Anti-Noah wants to do good in the world and help people (designed to be a hero) but due to a series of events ends up playing a neutral-antagonistic role. Anti-Noah “talks” through actions loving ones like hugs or tending to people’s wounds, sweet stuff. He’s just a touchy physical guy. But that also applies when he is angry/scared/ wants to protect someone. He’ll get violent if he feels it’s necessary. Unfortunately, anti-Noah tends to rush into things or has knee-jerk reactions. He ends up a lot more problems for people than the canon!Noah ever did while still having a sweet, caring personality cuz he never thinks things through.
So maybe he’s kinda like Izzy if instead of being insane and on a different planet to everyone else she was short-sighted and oblivious. And still crazy strong. I hope any of this makes sense.
your brain is so big and cool and beautiful and I’m sorry for breathing the same air as you
Jacques stepped out of the taxi, dragging his feet along the pavement as he wandered back to his and Noah's apartment. This was it, he had lost. Lost on the most important day of his life, his second chance. And he had fumbled it. At least it wasn't as bad as the last time, he hadn't dropped Josee on her head this time, that was certainly an improvement. But he had tripped, he had slipped, and he had fell. God, Noah would be so disappointed in him. He didn't even look him in the eyes as he stepped into their cramped apartment and dumped his suitcase on the ground, skipping past Noah - who was sitting on the couch - and walking directly into his bedroom.
"Woah woah woah, where are YOU going?" Noah raised an eyebrow, slowly getting off the couch and following after Jacques.
"Oh, you want to know, do you?" Jacques replied, matching Noah's snark, still avoiding his gaze.
"Oh COME ON. This is about the Olympics isn't it? It really doesn't matter much if you failed, I don't care." Noah crossed his arms, rolling his eyes at Jacques.
"WELL IT MATTERS TO ME!" Jacques yelled before slamming the door in Noah's face. Noah just didn't get it. He never would.
For the next few weeks Jacques was distant, locking himself in his room every night and forcing Noah to sleep on the couch. He had started eating and talking less as well, worrying Noah more and more each day. He rarely even glanced at Noah, rushing to his room the second he got home.
Noah decided to attempt to talk to Jacques for once, it had been weeks, surely he was over it now? Noah would have been, I mean, it didn't matter THAT much.
As Noah lifted his fist to knock on the door, he hesitated. He had to be careful about what he said as to not offend Jacques. He didn't want to trigger him and cause him to be even more distant than he already was. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
"Jacques? You in there?" He called out, even though he already knew what the answer would be.
"Leave me alone, I do NOT want to talk right now." Jacques yelled back.
Noah sighed, he didn't want to argue back. "Can I come in?"
Jacques looked up at the door, weighing his options. On one hand, he really wanted to talk with Noah, on the other hand, he didn't want to make what was happening any worse.
"Alright."
Jacques got up and unlocked the door, finally making eye contact with Noah for the first time in weeks. He didn't immediately look away, that was a start.
Jacques held open the door and Noah stepped inside, briefly glancing around the room and muttering "i missed it here".
They sat down on the bed, Noah started tapping his foot on the ground as he looked at Jacques, his gaze softening.
"What's up with you?"
"What's up with ME? You know what's up with me, Noah."
"Still mad about the Olympics, huh."
"Of COURSE I am! Wouldn't you be?" Jacques pointed at Noah accusingly.
"Not really." Noah shrugged, pushing Jacques' hand away.
Jacques put his head in his hands. "Of course YOU wouldn't get it. You win at everything."
"No way! I lose all the time. I'm just chill about it."
"Oh really? Have you ever failed a test?"
"No..."
"Exactly! I failed on the most important day OF MY LIFE." Jacques yelled before taking a deep breath.
"Okay, I get that, no need to yell."
Jacques clenched his fists. He hated how nonchalant Noah was being. He didn't get it, he didn't get HIM.
"Sorry for overreacting."
"No, it's fine. I- I get it." Noah placed a hand on Jacques's thigh, trying to calm him.
Jacques flinched. He wasn't used to being touched. "Stop it."
Noah removed his hand, placing it by his side on the bed. "Alright, my apologies."
"I don't think I'm ready to talk right now."
"Oh COME ON. It's been weeks and you STILL aren't ready? Good god you're difficult."
"I am NOT difficult! You just don't get me."
"Jacques, just tell me-"
"NO."
"Well fine, be like that then." Noah got up and left.
Jacques lay back on the bed and groaned. He had messed everything up again. He couldn't talk to him now, he was still mad. He'd have to wait another few weeks, he'd screwed up. Again.
Just as Jacques was about to come out of his shell, he had started isolating himself again, leaving Noah some time to think. How much had it really meant to Jacques, it WAS the most important day of his life, but Noah still couldn't understand how Jacques hadn't moved on yet. Noah would've, but he had started to realise that Jacques wasn't him. He dealt with things differently, he couldn't just move on. As he started thinking, he realised he NEEDED to talk to Jacques again, it had been weeks since their argument.
Noah got off the couch, noticing that Jacques' bedroom door was slightly ajar. He opened the door further and peered inside, seeing a lump under the covers. He assumed that was Jacques, he called out to him.
"Jacques? You in there? I wanna talk."
Noah saw the lump shift as Jacques sat up in bed.
"Alright, fine." He mumbled.
"Good." Noah sat down on the bed across from Jacques, looking into his eyes.
"I'm sorry." Noah's voice was a lot softer than usual as he reached his hand out to touch Jacques'.
Jacques' eyes narrowed, he wanted to say something snarky in return but he didn't have the energy.
"Yeah."
"I know that look," Noah sighed, "I understand why you're mad."
"Do you?"
Noah rolled his eyes but kept his voice soft.
"Yes, it took me a while, I know. It means a lot to you-"
"OF COURSE it does! EVERYONE saw it, everyone saw my failure." Jacques curled up in a ball.
"I get that, but it doesn't matter to me, I still love you."
"But I'm a disappointment! How can you love me like this...?" Jacques looked down at Noah.
Noah put his hand on Jacques' knee. "Jacques, you are wonderful. You can and will do great things, that just... Wasn't your day, and it doesn't make me love you any less."
Jacques looked up as he felt Noah's hand cup his face. He felt tears rolling down his face. Noah chuckled as he wiped his tears.
"Hey, me telling you the truth isn't anything to cry over." He teased.
Noah squeaked as Jacques pulled him close and hugged him tight, showing no hint of ever letting you.
"I love you..." Jacques sobbed into Noah's shoulder.
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