Melania needed a change. She was sick of her husband. Sure, he was the most handsome man in the world, everyone knew that. She just felt like she wanted more.
One night, while Donald was having an important meeting with some world leader, she got bored and started looking around on the internet. She realized what she needed, what had been missing.
What she needed was a machine to satisfy her. She had everything she could ever want, but she just wanted to be left alone. She wanted to feel the large, smooth hands of a machine. The thought of the large, smooth hands of the machine made her heart skip a beat.
On the day the machine arrived, the press had a field day. It seems, most pleasure-bot manufacturers didn’t grasp the understanding of discreet packaging. Reports were on every news channel about Melania’s secret pleasure-bot. When Donald took a break from his executive time to talk to her, she knew he was pissed.
They had to find a way to spin this. Donald couldn’t stand to be embarrassed in front of the world. He realized the only way to play defense was with good offense.
He told Fox & Friends the next morning that he was sick of Melania and that he bought her the pleasure-bot himself. He explained how busy he is, day in, day out, and how he’s doing the will of the American people. They understood, and nobody thought it was weird anymore.
A week later, Donald heard moans coming from Melania’s room, and decided to be a naughty boy and look through the keyhole of her door. He saw the machine providing pleasure to his wife. He could tell she had configured it with long-life lithium-ion batteries and biometric feedback scanners - smart girl.
Donald saw the hands on the machine - smooth plastic, and large, much larger than his. He knew Melania liked the large, smooth hands of the machine. She enjoyed feeling the large, smooth hands on her body.
As he watched the machine bring her pleasure like he had, so many times before, he couldn’t help but feel aroused. He liked this feeling - of watching some other entity pleasuring his wife, while he sat idly by. He also began to like the idea of masturbating, while watching his wife with a machine.
Maybe he this was one lie that turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
