"the stove isn't working! ha ha!!! it... just won't boil! AHAHA!! DAMN."
"which way am i supposed to go? they don't make this very clear :( heh! where are all the parking places??? ehehehe??! there's NOWHERE TO PARK-- ahah. [false happy sigh] [rolls eyes] [slams hand on dashboard]"
"rrrrgh this damn dog doesn't want to do anything except eat poop!!! [waves arms dramatically] ha ha ha?? you can't just do that and then expect to be let outside murray, this is your own damn fault!! ha HA!"
"[on christmas eve, referring to many dead #family members] not to make this trite or anything but, i do miss Those Who Aren't Here, ahaha."
"and this WOMAN just comes up to me and says [mildly rude comment repeated in a dramatic mocking voice]. and it was SO RUDE!!! ah ha. [starts crying]"
bc like i have seen this done passive-aggressively as a way to express righteous anger and that makes perfect sense to me but this. this is a whole different animal [gif of white man with a "no sudden movements" expression, there is probably a bluish filter so he looks pale gray and fleshy] this. is different this is trying to grant people protection from your negative emotions which is already a terrifying concept and adding bitter laughter to that is. it is the worst!! i do not like it and BOTH of my parents do it
and like sometimes they are just little chuckles and other times it's uproarious/way louder than the comment itself; sometimes it is rly fake or pointed but sometimes you only know it's not genuine because of how often they do this?? my parents do this ALL THE TIME but they do it for DIFFERENT REASONS
like with my dad it is definitely yeah, a defense mechanism, this makes sense to me i am def guilty of narrating my frustrations as a way to dispel them, it is a way of compensating for overstimulation, and i actually get hella frustrated when people respond to that, and i think my dad's just doing the same thing i do and the laugh is so it seems less startling to other people because then it looks like a positive emotion and those don't make people feel like they're being SUMMONED FOR SOOTHING SERVICES ASAP etc etc since both of us HATE that
and sometimes that is what my mom is doing. like when she's complaining about traffic and i'm the only other one in the car. that is not passive-aggressive she is just dispelling venom. but sometimes with my mom it IS passive-aggressive it's a cry for help it's a WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING ME or WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME or WHY HASN'T ANYONE NOTICED THIS/SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE etc whcih is the SCARIEST THING, LAUGHTER REPURPOSED AS A MANIPULATION TOOL IS SO TERRIFYING
and perhaps what i am not conveying here is that this false laughter is a good 30% of my parents' communication, esp my mom's. my parents do not laugh genuinely very often and when they do i can't tell for sure that it's genuine because they FAKE IT SO OFTEN and like it rly sucks to feel pressured to laugh and to always appear positive so i feel bad for them that they feel compelled to do this but i'm. so scared of it. they don't even realize they're doing it and i can't tell them it's upsetting because that is too much to take away from them?? my parents are REALLY bad at communicating like my dad is barely verbal and my mom is just rly shy and cant take criticism so like i can't exactly tell her "the way you express negative emotion is wrong" bc BEING TOLD THAT IS, THE WORST THING EVER, so instead i have been hiding from them for the past few days so i dont have to hear it, this is destined to turn out just smashingly, tune in next week
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stormborns
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