I loved being a kid. Even back then I wanted to have kids of my own, because I loved being a kid so much. Even today, I want to give my son the childhood I had, the childhood I loved so much. But my childhood can't exist in today's world.
Saturday morning cartoons aren't a thing. Cereal box prizes aren't a thing. Walking to and from school on my own isn't a thing. Going outside for 10 hours a day in the summer with next to no adult contact isn't a thing. We knew where to find trusted adults in an emergency, of course, but we also had to learn TO find them.
I think that's a crucial skill to learn -to know when and how to ask for help. I worry my son won't. But maybe that's survivorship bias and maybe kids can learn that skill without being left to their own devices. Maybe it's better this way, but I'm sad my kid won't learn and grow the same way I did. The way I loved. Maybe that's a kind of Stockholm syndrome. Maybe it's because I'm scared of how to do this new parenting right, and there aren't any adults to ask for help. Because the adults I had then are gone, and I'm the adult now. But I still feel like a kid.
Maybe Mom and Dad were scared back then too, but I never saw it.
I hope at least I can teach my son to love being a kid. I might not be able to avoid teaching him that same fear, but I can help him learn to be brave despite the fear.
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