A personal eulogy for The Big Bang Theory
I loved this show the way you might love a child who constantly frustrates you. It was never comedically brilliant (Iām not a comedy writer, and yet there were so many times that they gave set-ups and I accurately guessed the punchlines). It was often Problematic. Sometimes the characters frustrated me, and more often than not, the writers would make maddening character choices. (Even in the series finale! Like, couldnāt they just let a female character be happily child-free? UGH anyway...) In a lot of ways, it never quite reached its potential.
But despite its issues, I will miss it. At some point it became shorthand for āhacky sitcomā in the comedy world (or at least, the circles I ran in slash the podcasts I listened to), but I think it was a better show than people gave it credit for. It was far from 30 Rock, but it often had funny moments in its own way. It never became the wokest show on TV, but things did improve once it settled into having more of a female presence in the main cast (and also once they started laughing more WITH the nerds instead of AT the nerds). And it actually had some really interesting character and relationship development over the course of the series.
-i loved each of those main characters, even when they made me mad
-the characters loved each other, even when they made each other mad
-shots of a character smiling--with such genuineness--into their takeout after another characterās line
-regardless of the material itself, each of those main actors gave SUCH good performances
-especially Mayim Bialik. So many of her line readings just cracked me up
-and I just really appreciated Amy Farrah Fowler and for some reason always saw a part of me in her
-I have such complicated feelings on Howard. He was straight-up an awful creep at the beginning of the series, but I also enjoyed him? (Maybe I wouldnāt if I rewatched those early seasons now.) I appreciate that he became more of a normal human being as the series went on, and Simon Helbergās performance (which I donāt think heās gotten enough recognition for) in those later years really grounded him too. Iāll always remember the way he collapsed into himself when his mom died.
-Penny going from a ādumb blondeā stereotype who was essentially an object in the story of these two guys, to being an equal in the cast, wisecracking from behind a glass of wine
-Penny knocking Sheldon down a peg at times when he was being a bit of a jerk
-Penny and Sheldonās gentle, underlying affection for each other. Some of the best moments in the series were between them (e.g., The Hug).
-Obviously I donāt need to say it because Jim Parsons has the Emmys to prove it... but Sheldon Cooper couldāve been truly, wholly insufferable, yet Parsons was able to bring out his charm and vulnerability and all the other shades of that character.
-They never had the guts to actually name it, but for better or for worse, Sheldon was essentially the most prominent asexual character in popular media. The asexual community had lots of issues with this representation, and thatās 100% understandable. But regardless, it really mattered to me. I found the depiction of a mixed allosexual/(grey-)asexual couple in Amy and Sheldon, and the way that relationship developed, to be quietly powerful.
-In a similar vein, the showrunner(s?) had alluded to the possibility of Sheldon being on the autistic spectrum, and there were times when they touched on this in a serious way instead of simply playing it for laughs.
-that distinctive, colourful costume design! (one of my best Halloween costumes was when I dressed as Howard in 2009)
-and just... all those silly little moments. 12 yearsā worth.
It feels weird to say, but this show was almost a part of my family. The first time I heard of The Big Bang Theory was when my sister lent my parents her season 1 DVDs (the only season completed at the time). She was in the first year or two of her bachelorās degree in computer science (since then, sheās completed her bachelorās, her masterās and med school AND spent a few years working too, so yeah, this show was on for a loooong time), and I vividly remember her saying, āYou think people donāt actually act like that, BUT THEY DO.ā As a scientist, she saw her life reflected in the show in a way no other show was doing at the time. And since then, itās been the one show that my parents, my sister and I could all talk about together. Iāve had so many phone calls where my mom and I would discuss what just happened with āRajā or with āSheldonā that week -- first-name basis, like we were talking about one of my cousins or something.
So much has come and gone in my life since 2006, and The Big Bang Theory felt like it would always be there. Now itās done. And thatās okay. Despite all its flaws, Iāll remember it fondly.
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