[wannab-urs]

he definitely fucks but there’s no way he fucks normal

[archliches]

man c'mon

[broken-horn-of-equius]

[enlightened-moth]

[prohaloplayer-deactivated202601]

if I had a plasma pistol you wouldn't hear from me ever again. i would crouch behind highway guardrails and shoot fully charged shots at teslas passing by me

[jame7t]

It’s ok to post this

[starsickangel]

this came to me in a dream i just woke up out of dead sleep to make this before i forget

[starsickangel]

no tags on this one tumblr, i think this post will find the right audience on its own

[hasenpfefferbouillon]

[hexbugswallower]

Ants have the most badass lives of anything in the animal kingdom, life as an ant is like warhammer

[hexbugswallower]

Wake up in enormous underground cyberpunk metropolis

Venture outside with your ant buddies to forage scraps from an incomprehensible civilization of alien gods (each one several times larger than the city you've spent most of your life inside) for the glory of your GodMomEmpress

Get attacked by a platoon of soldiers from a rival megacity, they're an offshoot of your species except like twice as big (basically orks) and like 10% of them are genetically modified supersoldiers with wings

Luckily, you've been engineered from birth to spit acid so you and your antfriends successfully defeat the rival ants and their winged miniboss

Die from getting stuck on a jolly rancher

[mclennonyaoi]

[mclennonyaoi]

this is the funniest piece of graffiti i’ve ever seen. thank you mr two pens

[geniusoflove]

[augustwasheree]

[psychotic-gerard]

listening to a man break up with his partner on the train and the first sentence I heard was "I just don't appreciate you cheating on me six different times, once with my own father."

[noah-wyles]

[headaching]

march 4th? unto where?

[jonquilisms]

better call saul is the funniest show ever because the b plot will be: cartel shootout!!! nacho is bleeding out in the desert!!! will gus avenge his lover's murder at last?!?! and the a plot is: jimmy has a job interview. at the printer store.

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

[teathattast]

[moonlitmartyr]

I hate ruminating on what could have been. Out here thinking "if only I locked in when I was 13" are we serious

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

you should be addicted to shutting the fuck up

You wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid

[doubleca5t]

World Heritage Ask

[iconicanemone]

Desperately needed to have this on my blog

[xalatath]

Tumblr banned porn to appeal to advertisers only to exclusively host ads for links you wouldn't touch even while wearing full PPE

[swarnpert]

*right clicks on you*

[swarnpert]

*views your properties*

[gummiehell]