[natural-selections]

It's me!

[memewhore]

[meerlichtz]

Yesterday I confused a friend because I called him sir and he was like ??? why are you calling me sir we’re friends? And i had to explain that sir is not a word its a feeling. my mac shutting down for no reason is sir. My cat is sir. My pair of jeans is sir. An email that finds me unwell is sir. Two bugs outside my window are sirs.

[meerlichtz]

Examples:

sir please stop eating plastic

sir do you really have to do this right now

sir *intense stare*

my good sir stop that right now

sir why are you just standing in the way

(warningly) sir...

please listen to me sir

(tiredly) sir please.

[ennairea]

Too many of us have worked retail.

Sir is very close to, you motherfucker.

[liquid-pie]

You motherfucker (polite)

[beautifulterriblequeen]

Sir (retail derogatory)

[louisegluckpdf]

every time i sit down 2 watch a horror movie i think of that one tweet :/

[louisegluckpdf]

rb if you too sit down in ur room and watch horror movies alone

[todaysbird]

in 2022 may you find many seeds, nuts, berries, etc

[mjalti]

I didn’t even look at the name I was just like damn I hope so too thanks

[johnnyjava]

[smolmeg]

wake up babe new jesus just dropped

[alwaysscreechingbasement]

[mymichelle242]

I saw this posted on twt but haven’t seen it on tumblr yet:

Y’ALL.

QUANNAH CHASINGHORSE

UNDERSTOOD THE ASSIGNMENT.

BTS:

[shitpostinguniverse]

[coezoiudinha]

[android1000]

[l3sb0y]

ovid / x / bilbo fabriko / hozier / @sawasawako / gustave doré / kurt vonnegut / antonio canoza / tim siebels / “Portrait of a Lady On Fire”

[i-narutold-you-so]

Michael Peña is the best part about the Dora movie

[thebootydiaries]

[ladyofpembroke]

@kittytudor being extremely funny

[fullmetalfisting]

when i was 10 or so i was deathly afraid of vampires so i stole the garlic powder from my mom’s spice cabinet and kept it in my coat pocket and if i was out at night with like my parents and thought someone was acting really sus i’d try to surreptitiously sprinkle a lil garlic powder on them 

like imagine a weird little girl deciding you failed her vibe check and promptly seasoning you 

[foulserpent]

OBSESSED with the genre of person who is constantly going ‘be gay do crimes’ and has strong moral opposition to shoplifting