Medical License, Schmedical License.

“Heh, now that’s more my speed.” Frankly, Boomer figured any medical tool in Zed’s hands was potentially dangerous. He actually wondered how many people Zed killed as opposed to saved. The “doctor” could be the most lethal assassin on Pandora and no one would even know.

He arranged Zed’s steak and firemelon on a plate with the complimentary grenade tucked neatly to the side. “Here ya go, Zed! Just what the doctor ordered.” He winked at his wordplay.

#boomers boomin burgers #IC

Most of the deaths suffered from Zed's hands were actually accidental. At times, he seemed as harmless as a fly. The lethality lied within his mistakes that he tried not to dwell on. He often covered it up with a humorous crack or his forgetful nature. "Speakin' of which, don't remember the last time ya stopped by the clinic." He shot Boomer a look, imploring for the other man to drop by sometime. With the faintest of sighs, Zed leaned back in his seat. The gratitude shone within his eyes. He bobbed his head in appreciation, not one for excessive gratitude.

Zed’s hands shot up, as if he was admitting defeat. Heavy brows lifted, which contributed to the multitude of creases in his forehead. “Now, I ain’t gonna hurt’cha…” His voice adopted a warm undertone, similar to a parent addressing a child.

“Do no harm n’ all that,” he reassured her.

daughterxofxatlas

She was still, eyes still wide with fear, but he didn’t seem to be threatening her. That was good…. Didn’t calm her completely, though. Hazard found herself far too reminded of the inside place to feel comfortable. Still… She tried her best to look a little more relaxed, folding her hands before her and swallowing the lump in throat before giving a quick nod.

“A-Alright….”

#harpy shrieks #{{ this needs a title. hmmmm. }}#Ic

Women and children were another story entirely. Zed tried his damnedest to treat the citizens of Sanctuary well. He was a bit more rough around the edges with men, uncaring towards their tolerance for pain.

"Jus' takin' care of--" He paused, trying to come up with a name for the rather dead bandit. "Sonny." Blood-stained, gloved digits trailed over a lined forehead. His eyes crinkled as if he was smiling beneath the mask.

"Ya need somethin'?"

Zed's hands shot up, as if he was admitting defeat. Heavy brows lifted, which contributed to the multitude of creases in his forehead. "Now, I ain't gonna hurt'cha..." His voice adopted a warm undertone, similar to a parent addressing a child.

"Do no harm n' all that," he reassured her.

#harpy shrieks

The skag steak hissed as he pressed it onto the grill with his spatula. “Glad to hear it, Zed! I’d like to say I’d frequent your clinic, but I try to avoid getting injured normally. Maybe I’ll pop in for a check up! Just, eh, try and keep the sharp things outta my skin if you please.” He chuckled and grinned, though Zed and his sharps did make him pretty nervous.

#{{ zed pls }}#boomers boomin burgers #IC

"Y'all always resort to the vendors." His tone was rather dry, but he mirrored Boomer's laugh. "Alright, son. Ya have m'word. I'll use one'a those fancy-- Ah, shoot. What're they called?" Zed snapped his fingers together, racking his brain for the information. "Stegosaur- No, no. Stethoscope. Those won't harm ya."

A very cautious young lady poked her head into the good doctor(?)'s building, looking over his office with a mixture of horror and terror. As if the bloodstains weren't enough to make her worried, the smells of antiseptic and the medical feel of it was. She took a few steps back, eyes wide.

Buzz axe in hand, Dr. Zed had the tool raised high above his head. Upon hearing the tentative patter of footsteps, he cast a flustered look over his shoulder. With a reluctant sigh, he set down the object and turned to face the young woman. His hands rested comfortably on his hips, chest jutting out slightly.Warmth and hospitality rested within his gaze. “Need somethin’?”

#harpy shrieks #{{ Hello. owo }}#IC

☱

Echo Log #15672

Pretty, lil’ miss swung by the clinic today.

Made some small talk with ‘er. …Sendin’ her off on a top secret experiment counts; ain’t that right? [Whistles lowly.]

She came back covered in nasty Skag parts n’ a nick in her shoulder. Nothin’ serious.Was gonna pick up a scalpel to saw off the extra thread, but lil’ miss wasn’t too keen on that idea.

Then, she asked me somethin’ reaaal strange. Wanted to know if I was missin’ someone.I told her that she hit her head n’ to go get some sleep.

[End of recording.]

#blight phoenix #blightphoenix #Zed's Echo Logs

#{{ whAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EYEBROWS JFC }}#Dr. Zed #Borderlands #ask #Zed's dumb art

☱

Echo Log #34582

One’a them new Vault Hunters doesn’t like payin’ dear, ol’ Dr. Zed a visit. Shoot, he’s named after a number. Think it was Un0? No, hang on. Gimme a second. Zer0.Got this big, ol’ gash on his abdomen, but he kept speaking in flowers— Wait. Reckon it’s called fancy poetry.

Would love to see what’s under that mask. Poke him a lil’ bit with a scalpel— I meant: Medical Exam.

Shoot, I botched this, didn’t I?

[End of recording.]

#zer0thassassin #Zed's Echo Logs #IC

☱

Echo Log #76590

Saw this handsome fella (now, he ain’t Handsome Jackass) starin’ at one’a my vendors.

I told him, “Son, yer standin’ right outside of my clinic. If ya need somethin’, come in n’ ask me.”Said somethin’ cocky back to me. Can’t remember what. Shoot, it was mighty snarky…

When he came into the clinic, he nudged one’a my experiments— Wait, I— Shoot. I meant patient.

His voice got reaaal low. Then, he started askin’ me all sorts of questions ‘bout Engorge! Reckon I never laughed so hard in my whole life.

[End of recording.]

#askaxton #Zed's Echo Logs #IC

☱

Echo Log #65470

Had that big fella stop in today. Reckon his name is Rick. Wait, that ain’t… It’s Brick.Brick had a run in with ‘em bandits. Bullet in his thought. Bit too close to his prized possession. Kept squirtin’ blood. Would’a never thought that a man like him could cry so much while holding a lil’ puppy.

Guess there’s a first fer everythin’.

[End of recording.]

#brickashimself #Zed's Echo Logs #IC

☱

Echo Log #23405

[Metal clangs, followed by the heavy tread of footsteps.]Now, I ain’t one fer sentimental things, but I do gosh darn miss that woman.

I ain’t a field doctor. Was never meant to run out onto the battleground like a Commando or somethin’… Someone like Roland. I saw those looks she gave him, even when she was with me. Maybe he reminded her of Robert. I— I dunno. [Pauses, presumably to drink.]

She’s been gone n’ so has New Haven. Makes me wish in m’younger years that I played Vault Hunter. Maybe then I could’a saved her…

[Slurs slightly.] Them New-Boo Stations- No, no. That ain’t right. New-U Stations… Reckon she might come back through one’a those. I’d give anythin’ to hold her again. No experimentin’. I propose— Ah, no. That’s ain’t right. Promise.

[The Echo Log ends.]

#Zed's Echo Logs #helenapierce #IC

friendshipstates

Your character has just discovered my character's journal/diary.

Leave a ☱ in my askbox for an entry that’s about you.

#{{ oh why the hell not? =w= }}#prompt

“Oh, I’m starting to. Wasn’t expecting business to pick up so quick, but it seems word spreads fast in sanctuary. I’m glad of it though. It’s always a gamble starting a new business. You could set up shop and not have anyone show up! Good to know I won’t have that problem. Seems the free meal thing was a good idea. From what I’m hearing, I think I’ll be having plenty of repeat customers!”

"Word spreads faster than when I set a bandit on fire for ah, uh medical-- Never mind," he quickly corrected himself. "Words spreads fast when there's rumors of good food." There. That sounded much better. Granted, Zed sounded a bit repetitive, but maybe boomer wouldn't notice. The 'doctor' was a rather forgetful man, in these days. "Reckon I'll come back plenty."

“Heh, well, I do try to make every every meal memorable around here. The meal comes with a side. Would you like grilled firemelon, sauteed stinging cactus or fench fried bladeflower root?”

Dr. Zed whistled, dragging out the tune: low and hoarse. "I'll... I'll go with the grilled firemelon." That sounded intriguing enough. The muscles in his jaw twitched whilst he clicked his tongue. "Smells reaaal good in here. Ya get a lot of customers 'round these parts, son?"

“No, sir,” he grinned. “Not if you don’t want it to anyway. The Roulette Platter is made from steamed necrophage. It’s probably one of the tastiest things on the menu in my opinion, but it’s got about a fifty fifty chance of making you violently ill. But if you eat it without getting sick, you get a T-shirt!” He laughed a little. “But if you’re not a risk taker I recommend the skag steak. Got fresh meat this morning.”

Indeed, the young man's words rang true. Zed didn't take risks; he didn't actively seek out the line of fire. He preferred working in sheltered areas, away from the rain of bullets. A hearty smile reached his eyes, crow's feet crinkling. "Reckon I'll go with what ya recommended, then." Better to be safe rather than sorry. After all, if he were to fall ill, the effects would be disastrous. "M'sure it'll be a meal to remember."

“Well then, have a seat wherever you like. What’ll you have? I’ve got bullymong burgers, skag steaks, rack of rakk, you name it, I’ve probably got it.”

Dr. Zed slid into a old chair, which squeaked from his weight. He was immediately at ease, comfortable in the presence of the other. Gloved hands slid across the table, fingers flexing. He mulled it over. "Depends. Any of these gonna give me food poisonin', Son?" He was half-joking, half-serious about the matter.