Undecided Human @iamtheblondegirl - Tumblr Blog

fopk

tastefullyoffensive

(via mandytbh)

dothrakcitybitch-deactivated201

fuckslug

why cat praised for being fat and covered in hair but not i

sizvideos

Introducing the Luuup Litter Box, a three tray perpetual sifting litter system that allows you to clean it in under 10 seconds!

iamtheblondegirl

But if you can see all the way through it, won't shit and kitty litter fall on your floor? ... ?????

the-bored-cat

A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other.

A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY.

The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.

He explains, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa.”

Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.00.”

This catches the blonde’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”

The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. “Okay” says the lawyer, “your turn.”

She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?” The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail.

After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00. The blonde says, “Thank you,” and turns back to get some more sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?” Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.

angryaroacedragon

Yooooooooooo now THIS is the kind of blonde jokes I’m about

iamtheblondegirl

YESSSSSSSSS THNX BYE

aestheticacadema

Soda becomes vodka and kisses turn into sex. Remember when dad’s shoulders were the highest place on earth and your mother was your hero? Race issues were about who ran the fastest and war was only a playground game. Remember when the most pain you felt was when you fell over and scraped your knees and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And we couldn’t wait to grow up..

Unknown (via socotic)

best-of-memes

qqqqqqqqqwe-deactivated20170301

sightings

ejaysaurus

Do we all just know?

wannawatchfriends

realitytvgifs

belllllllll77

iamtheblondegirl

YEP

bluewanderings

y’all need to know what happened in the spanish masterchef last night

okay so we’ve got sweet little laura here

laura is 8 years old. even though she’d been constantly ignored and undervalued by some of the other contestants because of her age, she was definitely one of the best. everyone thought she’d definitely get to the final.

last night was the semifinal.

she wasn’t doing too badly until the last test, which was so hard that it had only ever been done in the grown-up masterchef. the contestants had to follow the instructions of a professional chef who cooked at the same time they did. it was not a test in which you could afford to waste time or get distracted.

and laura, poor, sweet, tiny laurita, whose pots and pans were almost as big as she was, got burnt.

she tried so, so hard to carry on with the test. she knew that having the burn treated would take up too much valuable time, so she kept cooking. but she couldn’t. the burn was bad, she was fighting back tears, and even the judges were starting to get worried. she had to go.

at this point, spain began to cry.

everyone thought it was game over for her. she’d be too far behind when she came back. there was no way she’d be able to make up for lost time.

BUT THEN

SWEET CINNAMON ROLL LUKAS SWOOPED IN AND COOKED IN HER PLACE AND TOOK CARE OF HER DISH AND INGREDIENTS WHILE HE WAS COOKING HIS OWN THING

THIS WAS THE SEMIFINAL AND HE WAS PUTTING HIS PLACE IN THE FINAL AT RISK SO HE COULD HELP HIS FRIEND

HERE YOU CAN PRACTICALLY SEE THE JUDGES AND THE CHEF ASKING THEMSELVES IF THIS IS REAL LIFE

SPAIN WAS BAWLING

and then laurita came back with a heavily bandaged hand. she tried to continue, but it was too much for her since she was basically cooking with one hand.

AND LUKAS KEPT HELPING HER

in the end, laura had to leave for good. she just couldn’t cook. she tried, though, and she was asked if she wanted to leave twice before she said yes.

and so our princess left.