Three Flavors of CRAZY!

"Hello Darling! The name's Neo Politan. I work in Armed Robbery, Assassinations, Brutalization, the baking of sweet treats and Interior Decorating Take your pick and give me a ring!" Indie AU Neo from RWBY Make sure you read the rules and info before interacting!

[ice-cream-nutshell]

wiceschnee‌:

@ice-cream-nutshell​ {X}

“Yes. So you keep saying.” She lets out a sigh as she follows behind her insane acquaintance. “Really, that’s not… Necessary. I’m not entirely sure I’d trust any food you give me. Let alone made yourself. You know, looking for someone who runs away, typically screaming for them doesn’t coax them out of hiding.”

Neo chuckled lightly, walking with Weiss down the lone, dark alleyway. Hips gently swaying side to side, heels clicking along the floor. “Oh but is is, I always repay my debts Dear. And as for not trusting any food I make. Do you think I would waste my time poisoning it? If that is what you fear. I have no need to harm you Darling. At least not right now. Any killing I do, is normally just a job. And I doubt anyone wants to pay for your death..”

She stopped before a horribly rusted door, a very pungent and disgusting smell was lurking around it. Her eyes glanced back behind her. “Weapon out, Darling. I feel...Something horrible is behind this door..”

[wiceschnee]

"Robbie! Robbie Darling where are you?!" Neo can be seen walking about the streets late at night, She seems to be looking for someone. "Oh hello, Darling!" She calls to Weiss and chanters over. "I am looking for someone, Dear. His name is Robbie. He has pink fur, long ears, a charming smile, wearing brown suspenders, about yay-high.." She would place her hand by her knee, suggest Robbie was very small. "And I believe he is carrying a butcher knife, last I saw him. Have you seen him?"

“Um… No?” She didn’t like hearing that. Not a single bit. That was very, very concerning to hear. “I’ve never seen anyone who matches anything even reasonably close to that description. If he causes damage, you’re going to be held responsible, you know. Would you like… Help? Looking? You’re… I mean you’re totally insane. So maybe it’s best you have a guide.”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

“Me? Insane? Oh Darling...WAH-HAHAHAAAH!” Neo gave her trademark laugh before lightly flapping her hand at Weiss as if saying ‘you’re too funny’. “I’m not insane, Darling. I’m MAD! Hahahaah! But you’ll soon learn, we’re all mad here, Darling.” She did perk up a little at the offer to help though. “Oh why sweetie that would be ever so fabulous of you. I do appreciate it. And as a thanks, I’ll bake you a cake! Hahah!” Neo would lead the way, waltzing down a dark, somewhat foggy looking alleyway, resuming her call for “Robbie”

@wiceschnee​

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dxsty-knxckles‌:

“Wha-….What?”

“I---I mean. Uh. Oh damnit all! Just stay out of my way!” And Neo storms off in heated huff.

[ice-cream-nutshell]

WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE

“I do not care if this non-ladylike. You do not insult a woman’s car, Darling! The gloves are coming off!”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dxsty-knxckles‌:

“MIDGET!!”

“FUCK ME RIGHT NOW!!”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dxsty-knxckles‌:

“SKANK!”

“WHORE!”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dxsty-knxckles‌:

“EXCUSE ME?! IT’S NOT LEAD! IT’S STEEL AN’ IT CAN CRUSH YAH LIKE A BUG!”

“I’d sit on yah, with these BUNS OF STEEL! But it looks like someone beat me tah it already, TWERP! I guess diver mimicking car wasn’t lie, since only a shrimp would fit a compact..Like that!”

“TWERP?! YOU WANT TO BRING HEIGHT INTO THIS, DARLING? YOU MUST HAVE BRAIN DAMAGE FROM ALL THE CEILING FANS YOU’VE WALKED INTO!”

“BITCH!”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dxsty-knxckles‌:

“Hey i’m not a fan of Big Blue, but he has more cojones then Y’ER sissy mobile! The Buick would eat y’er car for breakfast like a cheap doughnut!”

“Hah! And It seems all those doughnuts have gone to your car’s LEAD ASS! but then they say the diver normally mimics the car.”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dxsty-knxckles‌:

“RED CARS ARE TACKY! AN’ PLYMOUTHS ARE MADE OF TIN FOIL!”

“Tacky?! TACKY? You wanna talk tacky then lets talk about that Blue pile of warscrap YOU’RE DRIVING!”

[wiceschnee]

"If you like cars, then you should really see MY car, Darling." Neo laughed and pointed to a parking space. A deep, blood red, updated, 1958 Pymoth Fury was parked in the shadows. The name "Christine" lovingly embroidered on her door. The head lights and grill gave Christine the image of a monster, waiting for one to turn their back so she could swallow their soul. There was almost an aura of evil around the car. Christine made the Big Bad Wolf look like chump change. The perfect car for Neo.

“Uh… I’m not. Really into cars, Neo. Eva has one. It was the first one I ever saw. Although yours… Makes me feel uneasy. It looks nicer than hers, but I feel like if I get into it, it might… Have a mouth, and try to eat me. With big… Car teeth.”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

“Oh Darling. No need to fear of that. I already filled her up this morning.” Neo chuckled lightly and eyed her car as it sat there, shimmering in the light.

“She gets 70 miles to the Soul---Ah I mean, gallon. Wah-hahaha! Yes, gallon.”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

wiceschnee‌:

@ice-cream-nutshell​ {X}

“What’re you… Talking about..?” She was clearly perplexed by this question. How’d she get into this world? Just like anybody else, she thought. Born from her parents. Unless she meant… Something else? “I was born to my parents. They raised me from birth. Are you trying to insinuate something, Neopolitan? If so, I don’t think I much care for it.”

She idly spins the chaimber of her sword with her thumb as she sits, not really sure what else to say. I mean, she was being posed an odd and mysterious question by an odd and mysterious benefactor. She SUPER didn’t like it, but what she liked less was oweing this lunatic. So she wanted to pay her asap.

Neo started laughing at that answer and it was a rather annoying, high pitched “WAAAH-HAHAHAAAAH!” That could probably break glass if she got any louder. The ice-cream girl shook her head and hopped down from the crate she was sitting upon, walking over to Weiss, her heels clicking on the damp cobblestone road.

“Oh Darling, you are a riot. No no no. I mean, THIS world.” She outstretched her arms to the fog all around them. Still it was everywhere, dense, thick fog that, seemed somewhat haunted and lost. There was no sound at all outside, only their voices.

“This is the Fog-World, Darling. Did you not notice? Have you not been paying attention? You’re not in Altas anymore Toto..”

[wiceschnee]

The air is heavy with fog, fog that didn't seem to be there a while ago. The lanterns of the street shine eerily through the haze and it's quiet out. Too quiet. Except that of a voice lightly singing somewhere in the mist. Neo is sitting on a old crate. Filing her nails, lightly singing to herself. "It's just a drop. Just a little drop of poison. A little drop, into my cup."

Well, it’s easy enough to follow a voice. Fog or no fog. Eerie features have never really weighed heavily on her. She finds a seat facing the opposite direction of Neo, and contemplates for a minute before speaking.

“Okay. You saved my life. I owe you. i get it. What is it you want? Why do you keep following me?”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

Neo raised her head from her nails and then raised a brow in an amused fashion at Weiss. Her legs crossed, the top bouncing lightly over her pleasantly thick thighs. “I beg your pardon, Darling. But from what I can see, it is you who is following me. I have been sitting here doing my nails.” She held them out, nice and smooth and painted pink with little cookies on them.

“But this is a rather interesting turn of events. How did you get into this world?” She questions with a chuckle.

[ice-cream-nutshell]

“Why do people insist on Gluten Free cakes?! Honestly gluten free had no benefits to you unless you are REALLY allergic to gluten!”

[sweetoothgirl]

Unicorn Funfetti Cookie Bars

[ice-cream-nutshell]

dorothyofremnant‌:

Oscar jerked back when she ran it over his lips, quickly wiping off his mouth with the back of his hand. “Fine, I’ll try it, just please stop being so creepy about it…”

He took the popsicle from her and took a bite. The chocolate was pretty tasty and the strawberry ice cream was pretty good too. “Ever think of using dark chocolate?”

Neo smiled while watching him finally give in and take a bite. Her hands resting on her hips. When she wasn’t busy doing questionable things, Neo had an obsession with baking and creating sweet treats. “I made a few dark chocolate types, but they are still cooling right now...They should be ready once the strawberry pie is finished baking..”

She leaned down and looked the boy over, only to narrow her eyes at him and purse her lips together tightly. “My word Darling. You are practically skin and bone, look how thin you are. Do you eat enough?” She complained, shaking her head. If it was one thing she disliked, was poor nourished people.

[ice-cream-nutshell]

@dorothyofremnant​

Neo grinned and ran the scent of the popsicle under the boy’s nose, wafting the heavy smell of chocolate and strawberry to him. She laughed mildly when he asked about poison.

“Darling, who in their right mind would poison food? Such a waste of poison. And food. It’s a popsicle. If you do not want it, you just have to say no..” She ran it along it lips, very cold, smearing some of the homemade chocolate on his lips.

“I’m looking for test tasters so I may sell these later, what good would it do me to poison someone who would give me feedback?”

[ice-cream-nutshell]

“Go back to sleep, Darling. It’s all a bad dream..”