Pinned Like A Piercing Needle-Prick
See, I can play with alliterations too. I can do a lot of things, and better. But the question is, do I actually care to? No.
But even with being half-asleep, I can still provide better advice than the others. Especially the the blue one. Karamatsu Matsuno is not a real doctor.
He got his license from filling out a form in the back of a comic book (not even a good comic book at that). Unlike me. I've spent hours studying, snapping many pencils in half, gritting my teeth, and burying my nose in decade old required-used-college-text books with Dorito-thumbprint stains on the pages in order to learn how to do it properly. I actually learned Photoshop to make a legitimate doctor/therapist license that I've printed out and hung up.
I've also Photoshopped many awards in my name for being the only truthful piece of garbage therapist there is on this rancid planet that actually gives facts.
You won't like it and you won't like me. But sugar will rot your teeth. Problems are like cats. You just have to know how to work them, but if you touch the wrong spot, it will scratch you up and you'll be in a world of pain.
Luckily, I am a hiss-terical breakdown expert when it comes to cats. Depending on the day. As it could also be very unlucky for either of us at any given point.
Because in honesty, I'm really not an actual doctor or therapist. I'm just trash. Don't listen to a thing I say. Don't even pay attention to me. Leave me in my claw-ssical despair... or come share it with me, I guess... -Dr. Ichimatsu Matsuno
Oh. And as stated in my blog info, minors: do not interact. I mean children, not the people that dig up coal in tunnels. I once took LARPing the story of Hansel and Gretel too seriously, and it didn't turn out well for anyone. So kids, stay away from me.
