Feelings Are Rad And Sad

I wrote some poems about how I feel I guess.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

Sandy blonde hair and a crooked cute smile. Eyes that sparkle for far away places with adventures planned for them. halo circle marks cover his body almost as proof of innocence fighting deviousness for control. Strong hands for they have to carry the weight of not only his world but the worries of his families. A mind full thoughts and facts so vast one could never find they’re way out once they dove in A sense of love so strong that travel could not stop it only slightly delay it.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

drunk people are a new form of the person they were sober. they express what they're feeling loudly and they dont care who hears them or what anyone says to them. they feel everything so harshly, good or bad. they act like newborns discovering everything again for the first time.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

it comes creeping back at night. when everything goes wrong and nothing goes right, it comes back. the feelings of angst and anger because you’re alone and you know you always will be . the only thing you know is darkness . the deep ugly  drowning sense of being broken and unfixable

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

There's an earthquake in my legs and I can't find sturdy ground. A tsunami in my eyes and they won't stop flowing. There's a fire in my lungs that's burning all my air. My head is pounding like the swirling wind that whips into windows and makes the howling noise that sounds like my internal screams. My heart is covered in quicksand and can't make a move. What has my world become, but other than many disasters.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

tick tock there goes the clock but I'm not getting any better tick tock theres the watch but time never moves tick tock theres a walkway but theres no end

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

Two eyes and a smirking smile were what I came to love Rough palms and heavy hands became interlocked with mine A kind heart full of opportunity was what I slowly saw Slow songs and a raw voice was what I knew I would hear A calm soul with a hint of fire blended perfectly with my wandering self and in that all I became yours

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

No body sees the world as I do, but with your hand in mine The only world I want to see is yours

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

Love and lust are far different things. But all I have for you is lust. I don’t see the twinkle in your eyes just the biting of your lips when I’m laying on the bed. I can’t ever remember what your favorite color is just the taste of your skin on my lips. I won’t want you in the morning after just in the moment when you’re whispering in my ear if this is okay. I will never get the “good night beautiful ” txts just the drunken “u up?” txts at 3am when you want someone next to you. And that’s okay.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

broken bottles shattered mirrors drunken minds and devilish intentions blurred memories slurred words deceiving arms and smirking smiles smoldering cigarettes burnt hands faked happiness and shushed secrets

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

Worn out, crumpled, and torn a little I still held onto it it showed the last happy moment I would never forget that day. “smile everyone” and the camera flashed just like that. The picture is still whole although the people in it are not. The colors are starting to fade just like the bond we all once had. If the picture was like the people in it, then it would be ripped to shreds, burned to no end, and thrown out like trash. But never will I forget the “smile everyone” so I hold onto the worn out, crumpled and torn a little picture.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

The mountains are calling my bones are aching for something new The sun will be my friend and the stars my guide The ocean will always be my home and the forest is my jungle gym Forever a lost spirit with a sense for adventure

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

She always stared at the stars and sky in fascination. They were an endless wonder. Filled with bright lights that could never be dimmed nor reached. She felt the wonder in her heart and bones. It was calling her near.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

You were my everything Until you left.

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

And suddenly you weren't just a person You became the song we listened to in the car You became the messed up bed sheets I never fixed You were the last light of the sunset You became everything I wanted and soon everything I needed

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

Tired bodies Eyes full of lust One track mind Focused on what think they must Hands start to wander With mouths they learn to trust This is going to be how it is For a night full of wanderlust

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

They say life that everything happens for a reason. But what reason does the little boy who died in a drunk driving accident serve? They say that everything will be okay. But how is everything okay when I have no family to love and call mine? They say there is a light at the end of the tunnel. But how is there light when all I've ever felt is darkness? They say life goes on. But how does it go on for my best friend when she commits suicide? They say depression isn't real. But if it's not real then why does my brain not work right?

[idkbutthesearemythoughts]

I got a letter from an old friend the other day asking what sadness was.. All I could explain it as was bird with clipped wings. It is screaming for hours but no one hearing your voice. It is the captain of a sinking a ship; it is the ringleader of depression, anxiety, and addiction. Sadness is a clock that is frozen in time forever. It is the darkness, sleeplessness, and loneliness of nights. Sadness is feelings left unsaid. Sadness is a once full soul left hollow. It is the bottom of a bottle that was supposed to alleviate pain, the end of a cigarette that was made to keep restless hands still. It is the unbreakable curse of life. Sadness is a letter from an old friend, written in the middle of the night , wanting to know what sadness is.