nutshell

life in a nutshell. welcome.

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

feeling like a fraud

lately i have been feeling like a fraud. i have goals for the future and im ambitious but i feel like i have lost my way. am i worthy? do i belong here? i just want a little bit of time to figure out what im doing. nowadays i feel like im just looking through my life through a lens. im staring at myself go through the motions like its a 3rd person pov. im split between crying and then invalidating my own feelings. :’) lol why am i like this. how does anyone cope with this? how do you create that balance? advice is appreciated

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

3.9.21

it’s a good day i think. i relaxed and journaled for a bit. i watched youtube and danced around listening to music. i made a schedule for this month and my goals for this year. i began my mcat schedule. hopefully i will follow it idk we’ll see.

GOALS FOR THIS YEAR:

- take MCAT

- exercise daily

- make weekly food schedules

- journal daily and blog daily

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

cruising down the river of life, watching people live their lives.

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

"red sky at night sailors delight; red sky in the morning sailors take warning."

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

food coma

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

okay is it just me or is this song amazing. bazzi has the voice of a god and camila has the voice of an angel. this is probably one of my fav collabs. 10/10 would recommend.

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

c o l o r in the v o i d

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

if the body is a temple; the heart is the deity

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

fireworks in my heart 🎇

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

Tired

im tired. im exhausted. every part of my body, down to the atomic level, feels heavy. as i type this, my eyes are shutting. words don’t make sense, people make even less sense. life goes by so quickly but each day is so difficult. we work hard constantly and for what? to die one day? i don’t understand. you don’t appreciate being young and when you’re older it’s too late. i sound like a whiny child filled with nihilistic beliefs but i am just so tired. i need a break. i need a break. i really really really need a break. is death the break? im not sure. i don’t think I’m suicidal. i fear death too much but i am exhausted. the bone deep exhaustion that a good night’s sleep can’t cure. im not happy anymore and I don’t know why. why am i not happy? I want to be happy but I don’t know how to anymore. I don’t remember.

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

bye it’s been a fun time 🧡💙

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

purple skies; happy smiles

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snack timeᵀᴹ

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

objects in the mirror are closer than they appear

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

it was a good day :)

[ifyoucouldhaveanythingintheworld]

New Apartment

so i'm moving to a new apartment. i can’t decide which theme i should make it. should i do plant or space or both or something entirely different. any ideas? there are no stupid ideas, all are welcome and appreciated.