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[ihategodandthatsfinal]

I wish i could Show Every single character in Heaven 'Satans turmoil' on Ao3.

Then I don't mean that for them to judge the person who wrote it, but I just need them to react to the ANGST and DRAMA 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

And also It would be good if they actually knew *why* he rebelled.

because again, no one must know.

[garthnadermemestash]

I'm a generous god

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

is jesus wearing a SKIRT? He's slaying!

[particularlypointless-deactivat]

Shit im an atheist and i dont even know how to answer this

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

A tually, Atheists are the only ones who can say "Oh My God!" Because thou shall not use the lords name in vain

[loweffortartist]

RIDDLE ME THIS [OC]

[garthnadermemestash]

Not today satan 🤘

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

God: I'm gonna kill this baby, this baby, yeah, this baby too, and this bab-

Christians: God is Anti Abortion, He knew us in the womb and he cares for us, he LOVES babies

God: what the fuck

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

Lucifer: guys, how about we are prideful and believe in ourselves?

Jesus: haha, no. *loads shotgun*

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

Satan: I absolutely hate you. I want you to die. I sinned against you, I hate ever part of you and every fiber of your bod- God: Love thy enemies

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

God: Thou shall not lie With another Man Satan: Hey god, You know how you like breaking your own rules?

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

welp, might as well throw it out there.

God was in his very private heavenly rooms, There was dim lights and mostly mild colours as he rested on his bed in the heavenly chambers. Suddenly he heard a light knock on the door.

- "Come in."

His right hand Man Lucifer respectfully and Slowly walked into the room, Opening the door varily and giving him a slight nod of respect and greeting. The Angels wings shifted as he turned and closed the door behind him.

"Lucifer?" The lord asked. "What are you doing here, it is dark outside?" His heavenly presence sounded a mix of confusion and concern.

The Angel Walked up to him and Bowed before his lord, The Almighty Yahweh. "To be sincere it is out of mild familiarity that I come here. I mean in no way to bother you with My presence but I assumed you wouldn't mind." He said and stood up straight from his bow, Nodding a little again so his brown hair flused as his blue grayish eyes pierced into the lords eyesight. "Simply, Nowhere else in heaven is making me feel bliss right now, And that is the point, isn't it, My Lordly godly presence?" he asked.

God thought, and tilted his head slightly looking away in thought. "I..Assume it is." He concluded, and Lucifer nodded and Walked up to him.

"Then it would be at my utmost pleasure to be blissed by your presence." The Archangel said.

The Lord thought for a moment, before his eyes softened. Lucifer *was* his favourite Angel after all. "Alright then, Morningstar." he said, still sitting on the bed. his hands grasping a little looser and softer at the gray sheets.

- "But As I already said, It's late. So I wouldn't want you staying uo too much." The Lord said, When Lucifer looked away he knew exactly what that meant. "Lucifer...I know you worry so much on your work, but you should *really* take it easy on ya.."

"I..I'll consider it My Lord." Lucifer said hesitantly. With his arms in an unsure and defensive cross. The Lord nodded, and Lucifer went over to one of the White bookshelves in the room to begin reading.

God noticed that having Lucifer's presence there felt Almost *calming*. A natural, strange chilling way. He didn't know what to make off it, as he sat up in a sitting position, letting go of the laying position he'd allowed himself to rest in for a while.

He watched the angel, curiously so, And In an almost protective manner. As if he didn't want him to get hurt, even though he knew *nothing in heaven could hurt him* And the Angel even barely knew what pain was...

After he had watched Lucifer for a while, He started to get a little worried. "ey, Lucifer." He raised his voice a bit, catching the attention of his Archangel. Lucifer froze, slightly, before shaking it off and furrowing his eyebrows as he remained stern and professional, not letting any fear show as he stood with his back turned. he was about to say 'yes my lord?' but God beat him to it. "Cut it out, will ya?" He said softly almost in an asking and pleading way, as the lord tilted his head, looking sympathetic. truly, wanting lucifer to stop his studying and to get some rest.

"My Lord, I can't-" Lucifer was about to say, but got interrupted *AGAIN* Before he could finish the sentence.

"No Lucy, you need to get some sleep." The lord said pushingly and Lucifer sighed.

"fine." he Said putting down the book and lowering his arm he had reached out to take a book off the shelf. he turned around and walked towards god, On His bed as he was. "Yes my Lord, I will."

As he walked over to him "Good." Was the only thing god said, God had noticed how Lucifer's first response had been more like treating god as a friend, while the second Adressed him as a Superior. he also saw how his tone had shifted from casual to More firm and genuinely caring and Compliant.

for a moment Lucifer wasn't sure what to do After he'd walked over to The Almighty's bed, But The Almighty (God) Just smiled and tapped the spot beside him.

Lucifer's eyebrows shot up. "*me*? Cuddle with the Almighty *Lord*?" He asked surprised.

God gave him a playful tilt of his head and a playful smile. "oh Come on! Don't act so surprised, you know I favor you, and can be soft like this with you." God was very fond of Lucifer, so technically the Angel shouldn't be surprised.

Still, when he slumped down on the bed next to god he couldn't help but feel that this was unexpected.

God looked over at him, smiling.

"Now time to get you some sleep."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Two beings Layed cradled together, Lucifer In Yahweh's Arms and Yahweh with lucifer's hands loosely hugging him, though not quite holding him.

They breathed softly, as they layed there in the bed. Lucifer felt comforted and Safe.

As his head was at about The height of Facing into god's chest and at that level next to him, compared to him, and would have layed into him if they had been closer, and not as apart.

God smiled contentedly.

Finally, Lucifer would finally get some *sleep*

[k-i-l-l-e-r-b-e-e-6-9]

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

no thanks!

[existennialmemes]

Christmas Movie, but it's from the perspective of Jesus Christ, who sneaks back to Earth, and is immediately confused why everyone is celebrating his birthday in December.

He wanders into a Megachurch on accident, thinking it was a mini mall, and hears an evangelist (who lives in a mansion) taking the Lord's name in Vain to guilt donations out of people. Then he gets arrested for rushing the stage and beating that guy with a whip.

A significant chunk of the movie is just his elaborate escape from prison, wherein he starts a riot upon learning how cruelly the prisoners are treated by a blasphemous carceral system.

The movie ends with him using God Magic on the president of the US, and being formally declared the Anti Christ by the Catholic Church

[ihategodandthatsfinal]

God: Blasphemy Is a Sin

Me: But Rape is not?