it's a long road, to get it right.

Freddie Hickson. 20. Inventor. –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– ❝No one really knows his {m i n d} and no one knows behind his eyes. The man [d e s e r v e s] a medal, But he’s never really won a prize before.❞

[alanaeloisecolon]

Then why are you here? I mean… why stay? 

[iknowits-arock]

Because I love you. 

[alanaeloisecolon]

Why don’t I get to have any say over how the world spins around me?

[iknowits-arock]

You do. But there's a point where it becomes unhealthy. It becomes...obsessive. And instead of aiding yourself, you're hurting yourself.

[obrien-news]

[alanaeloisecolon]

No, it’s the only part that makes sense. I can’t control the weather. I can’t control my mother, or games being rescheduled and pushing into my paper-writing time. I can’t control who likes me, who doesn’t, or who’s going to risk their lives in a storm that could have gone so much worse than it did. I can’t control any of that. I can’t…. all I get to control is what I do. And I have to, Freddie. 

[iknowits-arock]

It may feel like it, but the world won't end if you don't. And I know it's not my place to say that because I'm not you, and I'm not in your head but...I just want you to be ok. I'm so worried about you, and I feel so desperate to help you but I just can't... Alana, I think you––...we need to get help.

[alanaeloisecolon]

Me, Freddie. I get to control me. When I sleep, what I do, when I eat…. it’s all I get to control.

[iknowits-arock]

O..kay. And–– And that scares you? I'm just..I'm concerned for you because I know you like to have things set up, and ready to go, nothing spontaneous... But don't you think it's getting to the point where you can't...You can't live your life? It's unhealthy, Alana.

[mrsmaudlin]

[alanaeloisecolon]

I don’t know if it’s wrong. Everything else is going crazy right now, and I can’t control any of it. I get my schedule set, and a tornado happens. This is the only thing I have any real control over. Sometimes it scares me, but most of the other times, it’s the only thing that makes sense anymore.

[iknowits-arock]

What's the only thing that you feel like you can control? You can tell me, Alana. I won't judge you. I love you.

[alanaeloisecolon]

That’s the thing – I don’t know if I can.

[iknowits-arock]

It may be hard, Alana, but I need you to tell me. I can't help you, if I don't...If I don't know what's wrong.

[alanaeloisecolon]

I lied to you.

[iknowits-arock]

Then tell me the truth.

[alanaeloisecolon]

When you’re with me, everything is okay.

[iknowits-arock]

I'm glad. I'm so, so glad, Alana. 

[alanaeloisecolon]

And I always will. Okay? Just remember that. 

But I need to tell you something.

[iknowits-arock]

Anything.

[alanaeloisecolon]

But… I checked the hospital. How did I not see you? Were you in a special wing? Did they not check you in? Did you know your own name? How bad is the concussion? Oh my god, Freddie. I was so worried. I was so worried. 

….I love you.

[iknowits-arock]

You don't need to worry anymore, I'm here.

...I love you too, Alana...I think I always have.

[alanaeloisecolon]

Where have you been?

[iknowits-arock]

I've been in the hospital since Monday. When the tornado hit, I think I shelf clocked me in the head, and I got a concussion. My phone wasn't with me, I'm so sorry. Are you ok? What happened to your lip?

[alanaeloisecolon]

Oh my god.

[iknowits-arock]

Hey, hey... It's alright. I'm ok now, Alana.

[andwetalktoo]

Freddie… Freddie? What the hell? Where have you been?

[iknowits-arock]

Well...I was trapped in a book store for a few days. And then I went to the hospital because God knows what fell and hit my head, found out I had a concussion, hung out there for a day and a half with no cell phone...And here I am.

[alanaeloisecolon]

Oh my god. Oh my god.

[iknowits-arock]

Alana! Hey, oh my god. Sorry I've just...It's been a long few days. How are you? Are you ok?

[iknowits-arock]

Only thing I have to say about these past four days is...No chill.