Just Keep Swimming...

Breathe....

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Open mic at the Cushion Biddulph with this magnificent beast... (James Earnshaw) Great night as always, made greater with this smile the wonderful human puts on my face everyday 😊♥️ (at The Crown & Cushion) https://www.instagram.com/p/BqM9OwTgSBK/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1vd69dhbom62j

[imalwaysthatgirll]

29th October 2018 Well we went out for some shopping and I came home with a new baby. 🎃 Looks like our first Halloween together is going to be a long one 😂😂 (also begging and being all hyper can work out for you, sometimes 🤫) Photo taken by @thornleaf James Earnshaw, Edited by Veronica H Holmes (Olive Studios) #photography #halloween #anxietyrelief #mentalhealth #anxiety #myrock https://www.instagram.com/p/BpludajhyoF/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=2ot3ppjnh6je

[imalwaysthatgirll]

So I took a selfie on Saturday (15th) when me and the gorgeous @thornleaf went to meet @palewaves at HMV Hanley ♥️ I feel a-little pretty In the photo but at the same time convention tells me I’m wrong 😅 all in all the day was ok and I enjoyed it other then the anxiety attacks. #palewaves #hmv #mentalhealth #anxiety #anxietyrelief (at hmv) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bn0mlUAgQmt/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=cci0703rhkkf

[imalwaysthatgirll]

For the first time in a long time I did a performance @victoriahotel (instead of arranging them for other people) 🙄 anyway it went really well and I enjoyed everything about it..... great friends, great drinks and great people. Thank you for making my comeback to music a phenomenal one 😘🧡 #comebackstronger #music #loved (at Newcastle under Lyme) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bngco6Ghuaw/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1kows95k8ha8n

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Hey you guys, I remember watching a video where you said you didn’t remember if Jason was in house or not and that the only thing were we’re getting was photos so here is the clip, it just come on my tv as I was watching and I remember also just so you know the episode is called “The Tyrant and it S6,E4 much love. ♥️♥️@trishapaytas @jasonnash

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Not uploaded anything for awhile so thought I would do something for you. Pain is stoping me from doing a lot at the moment. This isn’t very good but it will have to do for now. #hopelessromantic #musically #chronicpain ♥️🧡

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Spent a week stuck In a hotel so filmed a few things this is one of them. #hotel #musically #hopelessromantic #somebodyoncetoldme 🧡♥️

[imalwaysthatgirll]

****Thursday throwback**** Isn’t it amazing how you look and feel when your in love, you feel lighter, pretty and like nothing can touch you.... being big and beautiful is never a bad thing.... and it’s even better when your with someone who see it and loves you more for it....🧡🧡 I haven’t taken a lot of photos lately because I just don’t look as good anymore. Heart brake destroys every part of you and it’s even worse when you know it was all your fault 🤭🙄😔 #fillyourheart #hopelessromantic #loveyourself #forgiveness #bigandbeautiful #takemeback #takeitallback #love

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Not done any for a while, need uploads on musically 💙 some happy some sad but as always they are there.... did some little cosplays, not done that for ages either, but as I went to one this weekend I though I might. 💜 #fillyourheart #hopelessromantic #loveyourself #cosplay #harleyquinn #dccomics #musically

[imalwaysthatgirll]

*Throw back* this photo was taken in a place that feels more like home to me then anywhere else and reminds me of a great night with @zombimo_zombs_sfx, sometimes things happen and you get hurt and things can be stolen from you. But the one thing no one can ever take from you is your memory’s ♥️🧡♥️🌻 #hopelessromantic #hope #loveyourself #loveyourfriends #fillyourheart #memory #missingyou

[imalwaysthatgirll]

#trying #failing #brokenheart #hopelessromantic #hope 🧡♥️ (at High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire)

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Snapchat got me over here looking like a cute ass god damn bunny rabbit 😂👏 having alittle more me time from ordering things I need for the office and changing my flat. TTFN 👋 ♥️♥️ #downtime #bunny🐰 #bunny #metime (at High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire)

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Alittle me time before I lose my mind. 🙄#fallingapart #brake #broken (at High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire)

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Having a change 🤞since my depression is at rock bottom and I can’t sleep during the night I have now gone for what I was going to be doing with “JD” anyway. Changing things round and throwing things out and trying to stop myself having a bloody meltdown in the process. #destraction #heartbroken #secondchances #continue #loveyou #oldmemories 😔😔

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Dear the man that called me fat…..

Dear the man I loved that called me fat,

I loved you, more then i had ever loved anyone but why did you have to do that?

Why did you have to go and brake all the love I had for you.

I had loved you for so many years with out ever asking for your love back, but one day something changed in you and you desided to love me too.

So I let you love me, I let you in, deeper then I should have.

But you wouldn’t touch me, you would only kiss me…….

Are physical relationship was non existent.

But you still keep telling me you loved me so we kept going.

Why I have no idea, selfishness I guess or maybe just plain stupidity.

I never really noticed the diggs that you made, the comments and the looks, then some how at some point I did.

The comments about my body, the way you said things about my me to other people.

I was very much blinded by love.

So dear the man I loved that called me fat, thank you showing me who you really are and helping me let go of the love I held for you.

Dear the man I loved that called me fat…. I loved you, now I don’t even know you.

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Why do I even try haha 😅😂

[imalwaysthatgirll]

Cleaning things out and moving things round and getting my office sorted. Finally!! #backatit #workingonmyself #youtuber #youtubechannel 🤞😊🙌🧡

[imalwaysthatgirll]

The song that started my new year with a bang!! Definitely not a night I am ever going to forget. Because that’s where it all started. #takemeback #secondchances #heartbroken #forJD #loveyou 💔🧡