Immodest Jewish Girl Problems

So hard being this Jewish and this immodest!

[progressivejudaism]

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn on Twitter

“9-year-old: Why do we have to dress up for church? Me: To show God we have our act together. 9: But he knows we're lying.”

9-year-old: Why do we have to dress up for church?

Me: To show God we have our act together.

9: But he knows we're lying.

@xplodingunicorn

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Shavuot, The Jewish Festival Of Sex, Books And Cheese Is Upon Us. Let’s Rage.

Stock up on Lactaid pills and follow along.

Bringing this account out of retirement for this epic article. Happy Shavuot! “We f****d in a field and got the Torah. Now let’s make a cheese board.” —Jenny Singer @jeanvaljenny

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

I got the Kylie lip kit in Posie K, but I kissed my tallit and now it's on everything.

#immodestJewishgirlproblems

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

From the brilliant “Egalitarian Memes For Capital ‘C’ Conservative Teens” Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Egalitarian-Memes-For-Capital-C-Conservative-Teens-1444725098926756/

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Dear UJA, 

Your tag line is better suited to @porn4jews. (The image? Less so.)

Love, 

Immodest Jew

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Spending my evening texting Abraham Joshua Heschel puns to my father. Which is what Saint Valentine of Terni died for.

#immodestjewishgirlproblems

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Gold glitter lens filter is really Moses' קרן עור פניו filter.

#immodestJewishgirlproblems

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

On Wednesday, the candles are pink!

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Apparently messaging all the men on JDate, 'You'd be so handsome if you smiled,' isn't a winning strategy.

#immodestJewishgirlproblems

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Via @haaretz http://www.haaretz.com/jewish/the-jewish-thinker/.premium-1.619406, “What good is a hut with a view to the moon if you can’t shack up in it?”

[lascapigliata]

This didn’t get nearly the attention it deserved

[asearchforg-d]

oh dammit

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Grandma and her friends need to stop trying to set me up with rabbis I've already fooled around with.

#immodestJewishgirlproblems

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Anyone who manscapes as much as Rabban Shimon bar Yochai didn’t deserves to go hide in a cave.

#immodestjewishgirlproblems

[witch-of-habonim-dror-blog]

during sefirat haomer, can we listen to music if it doesn’t bring us joy

can i listen to nickelback

[cashcutie]

Rosh Hashanah snapchat masterpost

[immodestjewishgirlproblems]

Tomer Hanuka’s “Take the L Train”