Umm This Is A Personal Blog For My Thoughts

Like don’t follow me if you find this. don’t bother reading my post cause they’re just random shit that comes to mind when I’m sad or whatever. Also maybe one day I can go back and use these for reference to my therapist. 🤷🏻

[fangthroat]

✦✦✦

[immolation-scene]

Like WTF do you do when you have a once in a lifetime opportunity in front of you but your partner isn’t supportive like idk I love her so much I don’t wanna hurt her but I’m really in my head about this shit

[immolation-scene]

Feeling self destructive…. Might smoke a whole pack of cigarettes till I pass out

[closeyoureyesplease]

Today sucked I felt so… ignored, i guess. Our roommate has been a bit of a dick lately, it’s probably not on purpose I can just tell he doesn’t like me that much. I’m a lot younger then him, idk he’s like 40 something and my girlfriend is 30, I’m 25. This isn’t an issue ever but lately he’s made some comments about the shows and podcasts I watch calling it all mind numbing and stupid, including the people who watch it. I didn’t know one old commercial reference that him and my girlfriend knew and he’s blaming it on me being from “the streaming generation”. I just know by the way he talks to me he thinks of me as some stupid young kid which sucks cause in a sense this is mine and my girlfriends place he’s just staying with us cause him and my girlfriend are making an album together.

Anyways previously I started to learn how to play the bass since they both play guitar I thought it would be cool to be able to play with them from time to time. At first they were both super supportive we played together once and it was a lot of fun but then life got weird for all of us and during that time I took a break from learning for a month or two. Yesterday my dad gave me a bass to practice with and it relit my interest in playing so I was super excited to play with them again cause I really felt like it was helping me learn. So I wake up in the morning and brew some coffee for everyone and I sit down with the bass. I kept making joke at the two of them like “crazy I’m the only one with a guitar in my hands that’s a first.” “Lol don’t walk in here empty handed.” Kinda poking them to come play with me and then FINALLY the both come and play. I convinced my girlfriend to call out of work and have a chill music day with us since we were both off. For the first idk 10ish min it was fine I was feeling the bass out again but they both lost focus on playing with me and started jamming together (that’s fine they’ve got their own band thing going I didn’t want them to be waiting for me to relearn) but then they asked me to stop playing so they could get the count or timing down for one of the songs and after that anytime I tried to play along they just seemed annoyed. My roommate talked about re-recording one of their songs today and they both totally tuned into doing that which was fine they said they would be done by 9pm I didn’t mind taking a little nap and playing some video games while they recorded.

So they spend all day together recording and don’t stop till like 10:30ish. At this point I’m super hungry and board cause the who night was starting to turn into that and I really was hoping to watch a Halloween movie with my girlfriend. Our roommate asked for pancakes and sausage for dinner so the plan was for me to start cooking at 9 but that didn’t happen. Once they we’re finally done I got ready to cook and turned on some of my music to jam too while I was in the kitchen. Half way through my roommate turns off my music and asks my girlfriend to play the song they were working on and he played it like 5 times and then got it my way while I was trying to finish cooking.

Idek I have no problem with them working on music but I just felt like nothing I wanted to do was even taken into consideration. We never got around to the movie cause they kept working till almost midnight. I didn’t get to practice the bass as much as I wanted too cause I had to stay quiet while they were recording and I didn’t get to spend any time with my girlfriend that didn’t involve the roommate. I would’ve been happy just cooking with her in the kitchen with some nice music on but even that was ignored and interrupted

[kosmogrl]

[shesfancyfree]

[animatedtext]

requested by lesbianfeministsstuff 

[dankmemeuniversity]

[fiddlersbone]

Hello, neurodivergent person. You have to go to sleep because you have work in the morning. Your body needs a very specific combination of things to sleep, but it changes every night. You have no way of knowing what the exact combination is. If you mess anything up, you will not be able to get to sleep tonight and will be miserable tomorrow. Also, there's a decent chance that you will have nightmares and you will remember every nightmare you've ever had around bedtime. Good luck.

[fiddlersbone]

Hello, disabled person. You need a certain level of cold in order to sleep. If it’s too cold, you’ll feel sick. If it’s not cold enough, you won’t sleep. If you don’t sleep, you’ll also feel sick. Of course, feeling sick could also mean you’re hungry or you’re actually sick. You will have to sort through all these possibilities and figure out what changes you need to make in order to be less sick. Good luck.

[enbydust]

So y’all don’t have to keep making new ones

[killrockstar]

[escuerzoresucitado]

[closeyoureyesplease]

I finally have my own place and I thought life would be stress free (minus work) boy was I wrong. I feel so overwhelmed with life I want to die. I can’t handle all the bills, all the house work, taking care of our cats, and taking care of myself while trying to maintain a relationship and answer to my boss and my landlords who think it’s ok to just show up any time. I can’t afford any of my medications nor do I feel safe going to my doctor to get them. I have to get to a dentist ASAP but my cats also need medications. My job just reopened from a remodel and I worked a 40hr 6 day week two weeks in a row to get it set up just to be talked down to by my coworkers. I wanted to try to learn bass guitar so I can have a little excitement in my life but there’s no way I’m gonna be able to afford to get one till January if even. My flakey ass roommate promised to help us with a bunch around the house but ended up falling in love and disappearing for weeks at a time just to come home and be passive aggressive. I can’t get my girlfriends help with any work around the house I asked for some help on her day off for her to do the litter and switch one load of laundry but she didn’t do any of that and didn’t start dinner till I got home now I have to wait hours to eat it’s midnight and I have to be up at 10am. I’m so Burt out and overwhelmed I just need some help or a week off paid to catch up but that’ll never happen 😭

[the-memedaddy]

Meirl

[crowngates-deactivated20181210]

[hop-water-music]

[madnessofmen]

he's a manic pixie dream girl except he's a depressed alcoholic middle aged man