Inconvenient Ruth

She could bake a mean pie, but was a huge bitch, and so remained blissfully single.

[everythingfox]

“His favorite place is his bed.”

(Source)

[in-convenient-ruth]

Hard same.

[npr]

What’s Italian for “sheesh”?

Ever since the quasimythic birth of margherita pizza in Naples in 1889, Neapolitan pizzaioli have regarded their variety as the only true pizza, looking down upon differing styles in Brooklyn, Chatham, Chicago, Detroit, Kansas City, Melbourne, New Haven, Stockholm and Tokyo. For more than a century, they have seen anything beyond their Neapolitan borders as little more than nuanced blasphemy, the squabbling dialects of errant heretics. To them, non-Naples pies have counted as pizza about as much as Rob counts as a Kardashian.

But as Naples doubled down on tradition decade after decade, its prestige pies took on a dusty flavor amid a global renaissance. “My father and grandfather never strayed,” said 29-year-old Vincenzo Capuano, a fourth-generation Neapolitan pizzaiolo, in Italian by way of a translator. “Tradition strengthened us but it also held us back.” So Capuano did something his ancestors never did: He listened to the heretics, despite not becoming a convert. “I can learn from any pizza — even Chicago deep dish,” he said. “My family and my Naples never thought that before.”

Naples Rolls Out A Fine-Tuned Dough And The New ‘Cloud Pizza’ Is Born

Photo: Courtesy of Carlo Sammarco

[in-convenient-ruth]

“Even Chicago deep dish.” 

Buuuurrrrrrrnnnnnn!!! 

[hyrude]

accidentally bought whole milk for the very first time and used it in my cereal… milk lovers? i get it now. i didnt get it before bc skim milk tastes like weird white water but now i get it. it’s like using melted ice cream as broth. it’s divine. also i woke up in the middle of the night and made it to the bathroom about .5 seconds before shitting myself so. pluses and minuses

[in-convenient-ruth]

Eff this ess

Tumblr has flagged an ANCIENT post of mine featuring two Alex Coleville paintings that I posted after he died in 2013. One featured a nude child from the back standing with a dog. The other was a nude figure holding a gun. Pubic hair was visible. So sorry to have offended the anti-porn bots with art. This filtering method of having bots look for nudity and flagging literally anything is, imo, much more offensive than being confronted with the images in the first place.  I’ve appealed this, which I guess means Tumblr will have a human look at this to determine if it’s offensive or not. THANKS GUYS.  

[itsbyrosie]

[ripe]

bo_mang_co on ig

[dansoncapaldi-deactivated201910]

TED DANSON BEING TAUGHT HOW TO DO THE FLOSS IS THE GREATEST THING YOU’LL EVER WATCH.

[in-convenient-ruth]

Tonight I’m not takin’ no calls cause I’ll be Danson.

[lifesgrandparade]

Imagine typing out this letter and not stopping halfway and thinking “Hmmm, this makes me sound like the worst human being in the world.”

[bogleech]

Holy fucking shit

[catnipkittie5-deactivated202101]

I found the response for anyone else who was curious

[shesells136seashells]

Response is gold! I’d ALWAYS want a handmade gift more than some random store bought thing!

[in-convenient-ruth]

Good LORD! The person who knit them a fucking BEDSPREAD is a SAINT. This is why I only knit things for other knitters. Dear Prudence answers are almost always great. But I kind of wish this one had said “How dare you, you ungrateful bitch!” 

[npr]

Photography and nostalgia often have gone hand in hand; the scrapbook, the family album, the postcard, the Polaroid, even the Instagram post all reinforce a love for the way something was. In Nashville: Scenes from the New American South, novelist Ann Patchett and photographer Heidi Ross — both longtime Nashvillians — instead set out to show, in all its varied forms, how Nashville is.

“As emotions go, nostalgia is both cheap and unrealistic,” Patchett writes. “Sometimes we’re not even nostalgic for things we liked, it was just that we were used to seeing a particular thing in a particular place.”

The book, consisting of photos mostly taken in 2017, is about Nashville’s multiple identities: how the city is home to both the Grand Ole Opry and The Gulch — one a legendary mainstay of Nashville arts, the other a neighborhood that many longtime residents call made-up.

It is expressly not intended to immortalize Nashville. Nashville, both the movie and the television show, already have done that. It’s a project born of and meant for this moment, a love letter to Nashville’s charms and quirks as it evolves further.

A Love Letter To A Changing Nashville, In Photographs

Photos: Heidi Ross

[loloftheday]

Our cat had all four roommates feeding him each day because he acted like he was starving and we didn’t know that the other roommate already fed him. This was our solution, hopefully he will slim down a bit.

[in-convenient-ruth]

Jess and I do this for Imelda, who is a lie guy about having been fed. So now we have a sign that says “I ate.” We attach it to the fridge and if she’s been fed, we put it on the cupboard.  

[soyonscruels]

those who dream only by night: the gothic short stories rec list

have you ever felt like you want to read more fiction in the gothic tradition, but you haven’t the money or the time, or you’re the sort of person who only reads a novel if you’re sure you like the writer? i can help with that! here is a list of short stories, novellas, and one poem, all of which are important in the gothic tradition, the gothic revival, or contemporary gothic fiction, and they are all on the internet! for free! (i enjoy making rec lists, but i particularly enjoy making rec lists where i know that everyone who reads the list can get all of it for free.) so, take a night, make some hot chocolate, and frighten the life out of yourself. you’ll thank me!

manfred by lord byron (1817)

the tell tale heart by edgar allan poe (1843)

carmilla by sheridan le fanu (1872)

lord arthur savile’s crime by oscar wilde (1887)

the yellow wallpaper by charlotte perkins gilman (1892)

lot no. 249 by arthur conan doyle (1892)

the great god pan by arthur machen (1894)

the turn of the screw by henry james (1898)

the monkey’s paw by w.w. jacobs (1902)

sredni vashtar by saki (1911)

casting the runes by m.r. james (1911)

the damned by algernon blackwood (1914)

the tomb by h.p. lovecraft (1922)

the garden party by katherine mansfield (1922)

a rose for emily by william faulkner (1930)

the lottery by shirley jackson (1948)

lamb to the slaughter by roald dahl (1953)

a good man is hard to find by flannery o'connor (1955)

the company of wolves by angela carter (1979)

i, cthulhu by neil gaiman (1986)

[softwaring]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BmdoKm1gKc7

[curlicuecal]

an entomologist rates ant emojis

Beautiful big almond eye, realistic and full of expression as she gazes gently at you. Elbowed antennae and delicately segmented legs and body. Gorgeous pearlescent sheen like she is glowing. This ant moisturizes. This ant is round and huggable. This ant is a star. 11/10.

Beautifully detailed, lifelike pose but with an unexpected neck and odd antennae, perhaps scared straight. Her eyes suggest she has seen things. Her expression confirms she has seen too much. She is haunted and I want to know more. 7/10.

Floppy antenna, pointy muppet face, oddly posed legs. What is she? She has no waist. May be she is some kind of bee in disguise? I find her unsettling. 3/10.

This ant has an unexplained, double-jointed thorax, and no evidence of a waist. Her four-footed pose suggests that she a centaur rather than an ant. Centaur ants would be cool. I’m not sure what was intended here. 2/10.

Good first impression, kind of bland in the details. This ant has no particular waist to speak of, floppy rather than elbowed antennae, and an inexpressive face. Her color scheme is soft and hazy. I like the sharp angles of her stylishly sophisticated legs. This ant may not know quite were she is going, but she knows how she is getting there. 6/10.

Were you even trying. 0/10

Gasp! This ant is elegant. This ant has a beautiful tapered thorax, a segmented abdomen, alert, elbowed antennae, and a light-footed pose. This ant’s face suggests curiosity and a desire to explore the world. This ant inspires me. I want to be like her. 10/10

3-legged, waistless centaur-ant with strange, limp antennae and a beak. I don’t know what this is? It kind of reminds me of a Hork-Bajir. 1/10, not an ant.

This ant… makes me sad. All of her legs are broken. The MS Paint art style and gradient abuse convey distress. She has a duck beak. Despite this, her expression suggests perseverance and determined cheerfulness. I want this ant to have a better life. I am rooting for her. 3/10

This ant is a bold and challenging mixture of photorealism and caricature. She is broad and low-built and seems very sturdy. She looks like she would help you move. This ant is a dependable friend. 9/10

A picture of an ant from a children’s book.  She is wearing little boots.  This ant is wrong in every way, and yet I can’t stay mad at her.  7/10

An interesting, top-down view of an ant; her legs are positioned with slightly jarring symmetry.  Nevertheless, her overall impression is that of a graceful, stylized design, like a pictograph.  She is suitable for adorning fine garments and jewelry or perhaps gracing the walls of a tiny ant church.  I like this minimalist ant.  8/10.

This is a termite. -10/10

[cwunch]

[omgsexyfood]

This strawberry lemonade recipe is refreshing, easy to make, and a great way to use up summer strawberries. It’s the perfect crowd-pleasing pitcher for summer parties, the Fourth of July, and BBQs.

[xenitesunite]

this is a fucking mood

[the-memedaddy]