Totally Canon My Dudes

(in)correct quotes for ocs. mine, or otherwise.

[in-correct-ocs]

Jason: My therapist is selling her house so I'm gonna find the online listing and make her living room my zoom background before our next session. You wanna get in my head? Well, I'm in your home now, babe. I'm in charge.

Alex: I see why you're in therapy.

[in-correct-ocs]

Jason: so it turns out a squirrel would need to fall 4,800 miles to die because that would give it time to starve to death because squirrels can survive terminal velocity

Ophie: Jason, I'm begging you it's 2:30 in the morning

[in-correct-ocs]

Ophie, to Alex who's messing with him: You're trying to ruin my life? I'll do it myself.

[in-correct-ocs]

Amber: Ophie, can you come out please?

Ophie: I'm gay.

Amber: I know what, silly. I meant to the car

Ophie: Car, I'm gay

[in-correct-ocs]

Amber: what's your ideal date?

Felicia: DD/MM/YY

Felicia: other formats can be confusing

[in-correct-ocs]

Alex: wrong awnsers only what's your favorite class?

Jazz: boobie

[in-correct-ocs]

Ophie: I have no concept of height

Ophie: all I know is step stools

Jason: that is the most short person thing you've ever said

[in-correct-ocs]

Ophie: Skylar?

Skylar: Yeah?

Ophie: Don't fight an ugly girl. She's got nothing to lose.

Skylar: ... I'll keep it in mind.

[in-correct-ocs]

The Council: You know what they say, if it's not broken, don't fix it.

The rest of Heaven: But. But it is broken-

The Council: SHUT UP!

[in-correct-ocs]

Alexus: Come on, it's not like you killed anybody.

Dearbhail: ...

Alexus, mentally: FUCK

[in-correct-ocs]

Dearbhail: Look, one day when everyone I care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one I have.

Jophiel: I can't wait.

[in-correct-ocs]

Tania, after her first day at the daycare: Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid.

Alexus: You did what?

[in-correct-ocs]

Xena: How would you rate the pain, from one to ten, where ten is the worst pain you can imagine?

Ophie, curled up into a ball: The worst pain I can imagine?

Ophie: …

Ophie: …

Ophie: One.

Xena: … What the hell is wrong with his imagination?

Ryder: It’s not a normal place.

[in-correct-ocs]

Alexus, texting Kay: You're super oblivious, yet somehow smart.

Kay: Thanks. Confess.

Alexus: No.

[in-correct-ocs]

Dearbhail, watching an entire revolution happen in front of her: How do I always get into these situations...?

Dearbhail, spotting Jophiel: Oh, right.

[in-correct-ocs]

Amber, after losing her in a store: Where have you been?

Felicia: I've been looking at rice for the last hour.

[in-correct-ocs]

Screenshots don't scare me. I know what the fuck I said.

Felicia, probably