you're making a choice to live like this

[firedrill]

me: *mocks parents for not understanding technology*

me: *has to google how to cook an egg*

[inallofthenoiseiamsilence]

This.

But you can ask a cooked egg how to use technology. So who’s the real winner here.

[yourplayersaidwhat]

Me at a player who keeps oneshotting my peusdodragons in a small oneshot I’m running.

[shencomix]

[hotboyproblems]

this is my dream job

[nessa007]

The fact that Andre Braugher has still not won an Emmy and hasn’t even been nominated in recent years for his portrayal of Captain Raymond Holt is an absolute travesty.

[lizzie-mcguire]

[mockwa]

[assgod]

oMg????????

[apollos-justice]

I rolled 4d20 and got 69

[bdmemnun]

nice

[dairy-aer-deactivated20230131]

nice

[modernluigi-deactivated20200204]

nice

[justmonicca]

nice

[needledreamweaversrpgideas]

nice

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

nice

[gnome-bodyknows]

Nice

[pabloescoparty]

nice

[inallofthenoiseiamsilence]

Nice

[birdnormal]

Brave warrior, you have faced many challenges on your quest for the Chalice of Harmony. You have slain the Shining Gods, stood against the infernal legion, even faced the wyrm of the crystalline desert. But now you must face your hardest challenge - you must retrieve Uhp’daugh.

[1980sspaceman]

Wh-what is Uhp'daugh??

[birdnormal]

Not much, oh holy champion. What is up with you?

[inallofthenoiseiamsilence]

I’m stealing this for me D&D group. I don’t care that the person I reblogged it from is in the group okay.

[postmarxed-deactivated20190429]

Just saw a velociraptor sucking dick on my dash and y'all better appreciate me not making all of you see it too

[postmarxed-deactivated20190429]

This is so sad

[b0ggyb1tch]

Where’s the fucking picture, op

[postmarxed-deactivated20190429]

You fucking asked for it

[par-vollen]

me clicking that link:

[ithappensoffstage]

And how big your balls were. Which makes sense in how you create a tone in Deadpool that’s as edgy as it is.

Ryan Reynolds and Josh Brolin Insult Each Other

[obviouslyphelps]

Courtesy of Sincerely Tumblr on Twitter

[roze-rabbit]

This is the greatest post I have ever laid eyes upon.

[bencoppersupportgroup]

HONESTLY.

[mrdittomansir]

[summonerxi]

HIS DAD IS A DITTO

I AM NOT OKAY *SOBS*

[pkmnrivals-blog]

My heart

[blackmodel]

Viviabisvisbibi OMG……… MY HEART

[i-felt-my-life-rewind]

[yourplayersaidwhat]

““Word to the wise, don’t use mayonnaise as lube.””

— Our Warlock after we found an Alchemy Jug

[inallofthenoiseiamsilence]

I fucking love my d&d group.

[anarchetypalarchive]

i saw this post earlier about therapists and it reminded me of my old therapist paul, who in my opinion is one of the greatest men alive and who did not put up with my bullshit for even one second

anyway i go in to see paul one week in the summer of 2016, and i’m doing my usual bullshit which consists of me talking shit about myself, and paul is staring at me, and then he cuts me off and says that he’s got a new tool for helping people recognize when they’re using negative language, and gets up and goes over to his desk

and i’m like alright hit me with that sweet sweet self-help article my man, because i’m a linguistic learner and whenever paul’s like here i have a tool for you to use it’s pretty much always an article or a book or something

paul opens a drawer, takes something out, and turns back around. i stare.

i say, paul.

is that a nerf gun.

yeah, says paul.

i say, are you gonna shoot me with a nerf gun in this professional setting.

he happily informs me that that’s really up to me, isn’t it. and sits back down. and gestures, like, go ahead, what were you saying?

and i squint suspiciously and start back up about how i’m having too much anxiety to leave the house to run errands, like it was a miracle to even get here, like i’ve forgone getting groceries for the past week and that’s so stupid, what a stupid issue, i’m an idiot, how could i–

a foam dart hits me in the leg.

i go, hey! because my therapist just shot me in the leg. paul blinks at me placidly and raises an eyebrow. i squint again.

i say, slowly, it’s– not a stupid issue, i’m not stupid, but it’s frustrating me and i don’t want it to be a problem i’m having.

no dart this time. okay. sweet.

so the rest of the hour passes with me intermittently getting nailed with tiny foam darts and then swearing and then fixing my language and, wouldn’t you know it, i start liking myself a little more by the end of the session, which is mildly infuriating because paul can tell and he’s very smug about it 

anyway i leave his office and the lady having the next appointment walks in and i hear what’s all over the floor? and paul very seriously says cognitive behavioral therapy tools.