in this house we anihiliate our father's forces

Incorrect quotes based on the roguelike action game Hades (NOW WITH HADES ii: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO). Suggestions are open! Run by @emrowene

[kukuraga]

after Heracles and Prometheus

[incorrect-hades]

Hecate, pointing at the broken coffee machine: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just want to know.

Melinoë: ...I did. I broke it.

Hecate: No, you didn't. Eris?

Eris: Don't look at me. Look at Moros.

Moros: What?! I didn't break it.

Eris: Huh, that's weird. How did you even know it was broken?

Moros: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Eris: Suspicious.

Moros: No, it's not!

Icarus: If it matters, but probably not, F was the last to use it.

Dora: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Icarus: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Dora: I use the wooden sticks to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Icarus!

Melinoë: Okay, let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, headmistress.

Hecate: No! Who broke it!

Artemis: Sister Hecate...Odysseus has been awfully quiet.

Odysseus: Really?

[everyone starts arguing]

Hecate: I broke it. It burned my hand, so I cursed it.

[incorrect-hades]

Nemesis: I'm sorry for all the stuff I said.

Melinoë: And for punching me in the face?

Nemesis: No, you definitely deserved that.

[incorrect-hades]

Zagreus: What's your biggest fear

Melinoë: Failing everyone who depends on me and the mission I was raised from birth to perform

Zagreus: Damn, that's deep.

Zagreus: Mine is our father but I feel kinda stupid about it now

[incorrect-hades]

Melinoë: Does everyone know what they're doing?

Icarus: In general, or with the plan?

Melinoë: With the plan, Icarus.

Icarus, breathing a sigh of relief:

[incorrect-hades]

Eris: I sort of did something and need advice, but I don't want any judgement or criticism.

Nemesis: So you came to me?

[incorrect-hades]

Melinoë: Eris can I speak with you please? In private.

Eris: Oooh, someone's in trouble! It's me. I don't know why I did that.

[incorrect-hades]

Zagreus: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be!

[amarynth]

moonlight guide us

[incorrect-hades]

Dora: Those pants look great, and I bet they'd look even better on Mel's floor.

Melinoë: Are you hitting on Moros...for me?

[incorrect-hades]

Melinoë: We're going to defeat you with the power of friendship.

Nemesis: We're not friends.

Melinoë, holding the Moonstone Axe: We're going to defeat you with the power of incredible violence.

[incorrect-hades]

IM BACK

[incorrect-hades]

Zagreus: Oh, no. I'm in trouble. In times like these, I really wish I'd listened to what my father told me.

Achilles: What did he tell you?

Zagreus: I don't know. I didn't listen.

[incorrect-hades]

Hades: What do you think you're doing??

Zagreus: Honestly, father? Most of the time, I have no idea.

[incorrect-hades]

Zagreus: You saved me. I owe you my life.

Meg: No thanks. I've seen it and I'm not very impressed.

[incorrect-hades]

Zagreus: I'm tired of people telling me to "go to a healer" and that I've "lost a lot of blood." It's my stab wound, not yours. Stay out of it.

[brosnyaa]

z̶̩̀̑̈̚a̷̠̻͍̍̒̈́̀͜g̷̹̬̯̃̊̌r̷̰͉̕e̶̙̭͇̝̓̾ş̴̗̈́͋͒̍ü̵̪̭̓̌s̷̫̪͠.̵̫̺̝̎̄̉.̸̳͕͗.̵̡̣͂͋

(I shared the before to after sketch and final piece on tiktok!)