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Sergeiception

Sergei: All right Arytom I think it's time to tell you about the time that you were conceived. You see son when a mom and dad love each other very much, they decide eventually that it becomes time to bring little thems into the world. You are what I would consider to be a little bit of a problem child, in that she was laying there in bed all naked and women-like, but I just couldn't get it going no rod dog your mother. Yes it wasn't until she whipped out the tracksuit that things really got spicy. I shot my load all in one big go and nearly drowned your mother. And that son is the story of how you were conceived. Ember: Uh...Mr. Bylinkin, I'm not Artyom... Sergei: D'um here's 5 rubles...

#Sergei #Ember #Artyom #quotes #source:hughception

Dakota: You pick and choose what you want, huh? Ace: Just like religion. Jackie: Jesus? Jackie: Are you here? It's me, Jackie. I don't believe in you.

#Dakota #Ace #Jackie #quotes #source: super best friends play

Jackie: "You're just Russian to get into the good shit, huh?" Sergei: "Waah?" Dakota: "Jesus fucking Christ, Jackie."

#jackie #sergei #dakota #quotes #source: none

Luna: "You've made a grave mistake... You've divided my friends and I for the last time." Alina: "Umm... Who are you talking to??" Luna: squints "The WALL." Alina: ".... oh my fucking god Luna what the hell-"

#luna #alina #quotes #source: none

Dominick: I took a five hour nap today.

Syreis: I’m pretty sure that’s just called sleeping.

#dominick #syreis #quotes #source: the internet

"Dont cry for me, Im already dead"

Flare Honeybottom

#flare #quote #source: the simpsons

Well, the pen is mightier than the sword, but a baseball bat can be pretty effective too.

Batter Aria

#aria #quote #source: castle

Always remember to protect your crimes People.

Carlos

#carlos #quote #source: super best friends play

Clearly, I ruin everything the instant I open my effing mouth…

Stella whenever something bad happens.

#Stella #quote #source: TFS Gaming

Dakota: “You know how pirates used to be bloodthirsty ruthless killers and they’re now have been turned into cartoon characters.” Sergei and Jack: “Yeah?” Dakota: “You think they’re gonna do the same with ummm…. gangsters in the next 300 years?”” Autumn: “Racoon Falls Gangsters, If Jimmy has 4 cocaine packets and Benny has 3 then Jimmy should fuckin’ shank Benny!” Stella: “I’m gonna show you how to pop a bitch when he don’t give you yo money!” Gregory: “It sounds like something that could happen…”

Sergei: You’re not a Perfect Person and you’re not a Bad Boy, you’re something in between… Jack: I’m a normal man! Sergei: You’re a Bad Person, no wait… Jack: No, I’m a- Sergei: Perfect Boy. *Jack cracks up and absolutely loses it*

#sergei #jack #quotes #source: super best friends play

Sergei: "Stella, have you been up all night eating cheese?" Stella: "I think I'm blind.."

#Sergei #Stella #quotes #source: the simpsons

Owari: "It's over Prism! I have the high ground!" The Prism: "You underestimate my power!"

#owari #the prism #quotes #source: revenge of the sith

Dakota: *hands Jackie a glass of fruit punch at a party.*

Jackie: *tries taking a sip*

Dakota: *giggles*

Jackie: *looks at her*

Dakota: *stops, looking serious*

Jackie: *tries taking a sip again*

Dakota: *laughs uncontrollably*

Jackie: *holds onto Dakota's shirt* "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY DRINK?!"

Dakota: *nervously grins looking up at Jackie while giggling.* "I-I..."

Jackie: "YOU WHAT?!"

#Dakota #Jackie #quotes #source: spongebob squarepants

Man that's gotta be a McOof.

Dakota: *enters a McDonald’s after a really terrible day*

Carlos: “Yeet!” *throws a burger onto Dakotas face*

Dakota: “I just about McFucking had it...”

#dakota #carlos #mcdonalds #source: none #i would try and tag the whole big smoke's order meme but i'm too lazy lel #mcoof #mcoofles #mcooferonis #i'm mcoofin' it #i'll have #two numbrr nines #a number nine large #a number six with extra dip #a number seven #two number forty fives #one with cheese #and a large soda #thanks smoak

Dakota: Here Jackie. I know I annoy you most of the time, but here is a nice, hot cup of coffee.

Jackie: Why, thank you, Da- this is cold.

Dakota: Nice cup of coffee.

Jackie: This is disgusting.

Dakota: Cup of coffee....

Jackie: This isn't coffee.

Dakota: CUP.

#dakota #jackie #quotes #source: cabin pressure

Ragnus: Hyland, have you been taking your medicine? Hyland: I ran out of it a week ago. Ragnus: what have you been taking in the mean time then? Hyland: these weird pills with faces on them. *shows them to Ragnus* Ragnus: that’s ecstasy you dope.

#ragnus #hyland #source: none

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