Totally Not Canon

An iccorect quote blog about one of our favorite sanrio franchises

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Pack it in, pull the plug, shut it down, leave the dead meat in the freezer, and put on your Sunday best ‘cause its Arbor Day, baby!

Puko Probably

[yourfavewouldstealdiamonds]

FENNEKO from AGGRETSUKO would steal your diamonds in Minecraft!

(Requested by @sanibels.)

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Manumaru: I need your help! Can you come here?

Resasuke: Well, I can't. I'm buying clothes

Manumaru: Alright, hurry up then come over here.

Resasuke: I can't find them.

Manumaru: What do you mean you can't find them?

Resasuke: I can't find them. There's only soup.

Manumaru: Whaddya mean "there's only soup"?

Resasuke: It means there's only soup.

Manumaru: Well get out of the soup aisle!

Resasuke: Alright, you don't have to shout at me! There's more soup!

Manumaru: Whaddya mean "there's more soup"?!

Resasuke: There's just more soup!

Manumaru: Go into the next aisle!

Resasuke: There's still soup!

Manumaru: Where are you right now?!

Resasuke: I'm at soup!

Manumaru: WHADDYA MEAN YOU'RE "AT SOUP"!?

Resasuke: I MEAN I'M AT SOUP!

Manumaru: WHAT STORE ARE YOU IN?!

Resauke: I'M AT THE SOUP STORE!!

Manumaru: WHY ARE YOU BUYING CLOTHES AT THE SOUP STORE?!

Resasuke: FUCK YOU!!

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Resasuke: Look out the window and tell me what you see.

Manumaru: Uh, a bunch of buildings.

Resasuke: Wait, what? A bunch of buildings? Are you sure it's not a tunnel?

Manumaru: Yeah, I'm pretty sure.

Resasuke: Ah, dammit I'm on the wrong train.

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Ton: Komiya! I believe I am experiencing character development!

Komiya: Wow, what does that feel like?

Ton: It kinda tingles. From this day forward I'm going to become a total jerk with a stick up my ass the size of East Texas!

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Retsuko: Don't worry Haida, we'll be supporting ya all the way!

Fenneko: Ten bucks on Manumaru!

Tadano: Fifty bucks on Manumaru!

Anai: A hudred quid on Manumaru!

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Retsuko: Thanks for the Christmas card you sent me, Anai.

Anai: I didn't send you a Christmas card.

Retsuko: Don't you know sarcasm when you hear it?

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Haida: Give me one good reason I should memorize this.

Fenneko: I'll give you five good reasons. One, two, three, four, five! (makes a fist)

Haida: ...those are good reasons. Christmas is not only getting too commercial, it's getting too dangerous!

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Retsuko: TAKE THAT, YOU INSUFFERABLE F**KING SIMPLETON!!

Fenneko: Whoa, Retsuko! What the hell?!

Retsuko: Wha? I'm sorry, Fenneko, I didn't mean to snap like that!

Fenneko: No, stay snapped, STAY SNAPPED!

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Retsuko: Ok Retsuko, don't be nervous. He's just a normal guy. Just introduce yourself.

Retsuko: So you're Sasuke, right?

Retsuko: DAMMIT

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Retsuko: Soooooo...

Tadano: Wanna go drive cars?

Retsuko: Bitchin'

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Haida: Oh, if it ain't you, you old so-and-so!

Haida: It's been so long since I... Uh...

Haida: I... I mean youuuu...?

Washimi: We've never met before.

Haida: Oh thank god!

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

CEO: And not just any mahogany! But mahogany from the planet of Malchior 7! Where the trees are 300 feet tall and breathe fire! From these trees this desk was forged 2,000 years ago, using ancient blood rituals of the ancient Malchior people! Not only does this make my desk nigh indestructible, but it can bend the fabric of the universe itself! Also, it's a very fine material. Very expensive.

Washimi: Oh...kay.

CEO: Mahogany.

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Oh no, don't mind me, I'm just a little bit absolutely livid.

Ton

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Resasuke: Are you OK in there?

Ton: Yeah, I'm fan-fucking-tastic. Nothing but gumdrops and ice cream in here.

Resasuke: Oh really!? Can I come in too!?

Ton: I'm surrounded by idiots.

Resasuke: I thought you were surrounded by gumdrops and ice cream!

Ton: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH. THAT'S IT. EVERYONE DIES.

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

CEO: Washimi... WAAAAAASHIMI.

Washimi: WHAT?!

CEO: I saw a bird. It was pretty. Kick it's ass.

[incorrectaggretsukoquotes]

Ton: Alright maggots, listen up, Ton's 'bout to teach you the pecking order; it goes you, the dirt, the worms inside of the dirt, Ton's stool, CEO... then Ton. Any questions?

Haida: Um, yeah, I- [Gets blasted out of the office]

Ton: Enjoy the climb back up, bitch!