Incorrect Panda Pearl Quotes

this is also a texts from last night and dirty cnfession blog too basically all types of shitposts

[incorrectpandapearl]

maria: bitch

edgar: blocked

maria: wait wait i have something to tell you

edgar: ..unblocked

maria: bitch

[incorrectpandapearl]

Pillowchan: What color would your lightsaber be? Don't lie we've all thought about it.

Nori: black and red im emo

maria: purple purple purple purple purple purple pu

edgar: green so that the ppl yelling abt me about global warming will understand im one w them

reason: black like my soul

pillowchan: all right well fuck you guys im going piss yellow

[incorrectpandapearl]

edgar: its really muggy out today

maria: dad if i go outside and all our mugs are on the front lawn i am going to kill you

edgar: sips coffee from a bowl

[incorrectpandapearl]

Emi: That's it! You're all grounded. Maria, no carrots for you. Nori, no more cooking. Edgar, you're kicked out for the time being because we hate you. And Rennird...

Emi: Oh god, is there anything that you love?

Rennird: revenge

Emi: No vengeance for you.

Rennird: i was gonna say "ill get you for this" but i guess thats off the table.

[incorrectpandapearl]

edgar: hey kid you wanna buy some blades

maria: no!!

maria: blades r for skatin

maria: ya dingus

[incorrectpandapearl]

emi: i bought you this flower because it made me think of you

nori: uh thanks i gue-

emi: its cheap and fake like you

[incorrectpandapearl]

edgar: excuse you

nori: u cant excuse me that easily fucker

edgar: i can and i will guards take this excused fucker away

[incorrectpandapearl]

president: totally love this constitution you whipped up, edgar but we ARE gonna have to make a few edits

edgar: bullshit!! like what?

president: like this part where you called the citizens "fresh meat"

edgaR: RLY fresh meat

[incorrectpandapearl]

maria: im very sad

edgar: dont worry dear daddy's here to give u some compliments

edgar: relish, ketchup, mustard -

maria: dad those are condiments

edgar: see the thing is i realized my mistake when i offerred compliments, because really theres nothing to compliment about you so i just chose the next best thing

[incorrectpandapearl]

edgar: I love you i love you so much im going to make a sandwich out of you

emi: where are you going

maria: dad's gonna devour me now see you later !

[incorrectpandapearl]

EDGAR: How do you know if the water is boiled.

NORI: You can try putting your hand in the water.

[incorrectpandapearl]

Emily: great job nori, you're becoming more like gran

Nori: gran is dead, emily

Emily: wow see gran was also a little bitch

[incorrectpandapearl]

Emi: Maria, why is there a normal sized carrot in the bag of baby carrots?

Maria: They needed adult supervision.

[incorrectpandapearl]

Maria: Quick, you have to act like my dad to my teacher (since my real dad is a piece of shit)

Rennird: Hello, this is.....Maria's real father.

Rennird: Yes, the children are playing swords.

Rennird: Sorry, playing with swords.

Rennird: They're bleeding, oh no, they are dead.

Rennird: Don't call again.

Rennird: *hangs up* ....I panicked.

[incorrectpandapearl]

Nori: Hey watch this.

Nori: *loudly* 1 3 double 0

Rennird *from the other room*: 6 triple 5 06

(For those who dont get it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzgLY0Nkoa8 )

[incorrectpandapearl]

Emi: No one told you to bring that backpack!

Nori: Well no one told you to bring that nasty attitude but I'm stuck with both.

[incorrectpandapearl]

The Panda Crew’s coffee pot is found broken in the kitchen.

Edgar: So, who broke it? I’m not mad, I just want to know.

Maria: I did, I broke it-

Edgar: No. No, you didn’t. Emi?

Emi: Don’t look at me. Look at Nori.

Nori: What? I didn’t break it.

Emi: Hm. That’s weird. How did you even know it was broken?

Nori: Because it’s sitting right in front of us, and it’s broken.

Emi: Suspicious.

Nori: No, it’s not.

Rennird: If it matters… Probably not… Moko was the last one to use it.

Moko: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap.

Rennird: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Moko: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Tentadick!

Maria: Alright, let’s not fight. I broke it, let me pay for it, Daddy.

Edgar: No. Who broke it?

Emi: Edgar, Enneth’s been awfully quiet..

Enneth: Really?!

Enneth: Yeah, really!

Cut to Edgar in the kitchen with the other members of the crew arguing in the background.

Edgar: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now, they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.