Incorrect Slipknot Quotes

What's up, my name is Danny, I'm a lesbian, I really like those "Incorrect ____ Quotes" blogs and I really like Slipknot so this is now a thing.  Feel free to send me asks and quotes, they're always appriciated.

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*phone call*

Sid: Hi, where are you?

Clown: You are calling on landline phone.

Sid: Yeah, and where are you?

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[The guys finish tour and are going their separate ways]

Clown, leaning out the window: Bye Craig! Bye Jim! Bye V-Man! Bye Craig! Bye Ja-

Jay: You said bye to Craig twice.

Clown: I like Craig best.

[angry-lez]

The fastest "aged like milk" post I've ever seen

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LOSING MY FUCKING MIND OVER HERE BUD

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uhhhhhhh

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CRAIG’S FUCKING GONE????

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WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU???

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uhhhhhhh

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CRAIG’S FUCKING GONE????

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uhhhhhhh

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Jim: Joey, you shouldn’t be drinking on an empty stomach.

Joey: You shouldn’t be talking on an empty brain.

(there’s no source it’s just a quote I came up with and decided it would work here haha)

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Jim, putting his hands over Tim's eyes: Guess who! Mick: It's either Jim or the cold, clammy hands of death. Jim, pulling his hands away: It's Jim! Mick: Dammit.

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[The guys finish tour and are going their separate ways]

Clown, leaning out the window: Bye Craig! Bye Jim! Bye V-Man! Bye Craig! Bye Ja-

Jay: You said bye to Craig twice.

Clown: I like Craig best.

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Corey: I don't think the therapist is supposed to say "wow" that many times during the first therapy session or write that much down but here we are

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Michael: I need life advice.  Sid, sipping Gatorade and eating cookie dough: You came to the right person.

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Clown: *repeatedly slams into computer monitor* Jay: It's not a touch screen, Clown, you have to use the mouse

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Mick: *pulls curtain back while Corey is in the shower*

Mick: Are we - stop screaming, it’s just me - are we out of picks?

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Kidnapper: We have your DJ.

Corey: Sid? Sid Wilson?

Kidnapper: Yes.

Corey: Good luck with that.

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Shawn: Wait... where’s Sid?

Corey: Oh, shit.

Fan: You can’t leave him on his own?

Corey: Haha, no, Sid’s our... have you ever seen a drunk baby?

Fan: ...

Shawn: It’s a long story, involving my son, a rum cake, and a low counter... At first you think it’s endearing to watch them bouncing off the walls, and then next thing you know, they’ve got a bucket on their head and they’re plowing through your brand-new flatscreen TV.

Shawn: God save me, it had barely left the box.

Fan: ...

Corey: Anyway

Corey: Sid’s our drunk baby.

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Mick: I brought you frankincense

Corey: Thank you

Tortilla: And I brought you myrrh

Corey: Thank you

Tortilla[taking of his mask]: MYRRH-DER!

Corey: *gasp* Chris! No!

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Joey: Dammit Corey, keep yourself and your gross fetish shit 500 feet away from me.

Corey: 500 feet, you say? 👀

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Corey: all the good percussionist are either taken or they left.

Clown: I AM RIGHT HERE