hate that I was understanding when I shouldβve just been a cunt

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@indighoulx
hate that I was understanding when I shouldβve just been a cunt
βWhy donβt you use aiβ idk man beyond the obvious environmental and βthis machine causes psychosis and encourages people to kill themselvesβ thing I think asking the equivalent of a solid D student who is also a pathological liar if they can answer my question/do the work for me seems pretty fucking stupid
i know some of my posts are corny but this is my blog so whatever
every time I reread my diary I laugh like wtf this cannot actually be my life bro
I need someone. I need someone's voice on the other side of the call to tell me that I'm fine. That I'm not alone. That I'm loved and cherished. I need someone's voice to murmur sweet nothings. I want someone to hold me when I'm trying to fall asleep. I want someone to read me bedtime stories. I want someone to care. I want someone to fill the void in my soul with their kindness.
I'm so lonely right now, I can't.
you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life
AnaΓ―s Nin, Delta of Venus
I feel my heart sink every time I read that people donβt want a friend or partner thatβs always doing bad. I donβt know what to do about doing bad. Iβve been doing bad for the past 6 years. I donβt know if Iβll ever get better.
WILL IT EVER STOP? GET OUT OF MY HEAD YOU DON'T DESERVE A SINGLE SYNAPS IN MY BRAIN TO LIGHT UP AT THE THOUGHT OF YOU!
I'm so angry, it's ridiculous.
Lying piece of garbage.
there's this girl i used to be friends with, and we don't talk anymore, but today i found myself in the supermarket getting the ingredients for a recipe she taught me, and it reminded me of how much of the people around us we keep stored in ourselves. like i am a graveyard of everyone i've ever loved.
sorry my hands are so cold all the time it's cuz i died a few years back
convinced myself that all of my friends secretly hate me, again.
Really gross of me to desire attention, disgusting honestly.
as my final act of love, I will swallow every "please stay" and turn it into silence so you don't feel trapped by my ache
hey i noticed your vibe was off for .5 seconds, was it something i did?
i feel like a puppy no one wants
up at 1 AM inventing new ways to want and want and want and want and