Her Sweetest Downfall

A twenty-six-year-old lady who once believed that life could be compared to the stories of the books she have read. Shattered into million tiny pieces, as the dull glimmer eyes of her would tell, she was slapped by the reality that her life is way too different from those stories. Eventually, she learned to piece back the fragments. She got up from the ashes of memories surrounding her, dusted herself off, and learned to walk away from a mindset that no longer suited her. The remnants of the past will continue to haunt her, but at whatever cost, she will protect herself from experiencing the crushing, all-consuming wave of despair again. Now look how she'll cope up and wander this heart-rending world.

[infinityjezz]

how do i fill this void?

[infinityjezz]

Wahhhh want to do blogging again, but I always forget to take good pictures. I usually just dig in our food and talk with my friends right away.

[infinityjezz]

Good food. Good company.

I love it when we end up choosing a good restaurant. Lol, finally had the energy to go out and meet my sisters. Not gonna lie, working from home sometimes makes me crave for human interaction although I am claiming I am an introvert haha.

Let me also add that I am in my era where I choose drinking lemonades over coffee lol.

[1anonyymous1]

[infinityjezz]

ano ba feeling ng gentle love

[infinityjezz]

idk im tired of thinking about the kind of love i want

[bnmxfld]

“Because in the end you can’t always choose what to keep. You can only choose how you let it go.”

— Ally Condie / Crossed

[infinityjezz]

Hello, it has been awhile.

I honestly did not plan writing again here in this space. But the effect of the iced coffee vanilla of McDo led me here lol.

A lot happened, and funny how I can't recall the details but I can't forget how I felt over the past year. It was miserable. I found myself crying while working, taking a bath, playing, reading, and even attending meetings there's a sudden burst of emotions that I cannot suppress. I felt so lost that I don't have any motivation to get up and face another day.

But if I try to recall a few details here are some: failed relationship, failed the board exams, allowed my work to consume me, toxic workmates, resigned, got rejected by several companies, lost friends along the way, doubted by the most important persons of my life.....

It was tiring. I actually have no idea how to recover from the sorrow and loneliness, how to deal with all of those at once during that time. Playing and sleeping were my only escape. It was tough, but life gets better.

Despite the pain, sorrow and rejections, good things would prevail. I got accepted in a company where peace of mind is not asked but given. The simple statement "I look forward to working with you." reminded me that it will get better. And it did.

And I have never been this content with the kind of life the world has offered me. My heart and my mind are at peace.

I am grateful that I surpassed those survival mode days. Today, I am most grateful for: the comfort my current job is giving me, my hard working parents, my understanding friends. It is true that during your dark days it is easier to just fuck everything and let everything consume you, however, I came to realize that I am still in control of some other stuff that would help me recover.

Cheers to every decision I made that led me here.

xoxo,

Z

[roundo]

blogging is my version of bloodletting. gets the poison out etc

[verformt]

whats ur filthiest fantasy?

That someone actually stays in my life and loves me unconditionally lmao

[danger]

[treygotguap]

[infinityjezz]

2013 geez 😳

[tolerateit]

lover.mp3 becomes so much more personal and impactful when you realize that she has been thinking about the concept of all's well that ends well for almost a decade and finally found her happy place and felt secure enough to put it out in the world

[buhaybabae]

also "I'm in the new hell everytime" to "hell was the journey but it brought me heaven" ♥️

[honeyglazedgoblin]

WOAH INTERESTING QUESTIONS

[d-eth]

01: tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?

02: what on your body is hurting or bothering you?

03: what was your last thought before going to bed last night?

04: what are you listening to?

05: what’s something you’re not looking forward to?

06: where do you think your best friend is right now?

07: have you kissed anybody in the last five days?

08: favorite song ?

09: kiss on the first date?

10: is there one person you want to be with right now?

11: are you seriously happy with where you are in life?

12: is there something you would like to say to someone?

13: what are three things you did today?

14: would you rather sleep at a friend’s or have them over?

15: what is your favorite kind of gum?

16: are you friends with any of your ex boyfriends/ girlfriends?

17: what is on your wrists right now?

18: ever liked someone you thought you didn’t stand a chance with?

19: does anyone have strong feelings for you?

20: are you slowly drifting away from someone?

21: have you ever wasted your time on someone?

22: can you do the alphabet in sign language?

23: how have you felt today?

24: you receive £60 without any reason, what do you spend it on?

25: what is wrong with you right now?

26: is there anyone you’re really disappointed in?

27: would you rather have starbucks or jamba juice right now?

28: why aren’t you in ‘love’ with your last ex anymore?

29: how late did you stay up last night and why?

30: when was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

31: what were you doing an hour ago?

32: what are you looking forward to in the next month?

33: are you wearing jeans right now?

34: are you a patient person?

35: do you think you can last in a relationship for three months?

36: favorite color?

37: did you have a dream last night?

38: are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?

39: if someone could be cuddling you right now, who would you want it to be?

40: do you love anyone who is not related to you?

41: if someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?

42: do you like meeting new people?

43: are you afraid of falling in love?

44: ever self-harmed or starved yourself?

45: has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?

46: have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?

ask me some questions maybe?

pls ^^

[ahuhluh]

patola

[justsayfkit]

someone being patient with u is one of the softest forms of love

[dsm7]

tumblr is the safest social media to open in public bc nobody recognises its interface. if u recognise it thats ur problem

[daddys-littleone6]

Nonsexual turn ons:

Grabbing me and making me listen to you when I’m not paying attention

Rubbing my back when I’m talking to someone

Playing with my hair

Telling me I’m a good girl

Helping me put on my shoes/clothes/jacket

Asking if I need help when I’m doing something like laundry or cleaning

Pulling me close in public

Picking out my clothes/pajamas for me