insanehamsterwheel

Ever been inside a hamster wheel? Don't answer that.. user on ao3: ascetic_lynx

[luna-azzurra]

Signs your romance subplot has absolutely no tension (sry)

♡ they meet and immediately like each other (goodbye conflict, we barely knew you)

♡ the only thing keeping them apart is a misunderstanding that one conversation would fix

♡ both characters describe the other as "beautiful" within three pages of meeting

♡ their chemistry is told not shown (the narrator insists they have spark. they don't.)

♡ the love interest has no personality outside of loving the protagonist

♡ they argue once, make up immediately, never argue again

♡ obstacles are external. they always agree with each other about everything.

♡ the rival love interest exists for two chapters then vanishes without explanation

♡ they almost kiss. something interrupts. this happens four times. on the fifth time they kiss. the end.

♡ the love interest is described as funny, clever, and kind. we see none of this.

♡ their big emotional moment is in the rain. it is always in the rain.

♡ the breakup lasts exactly one chapter before they reconcile

♡ "i've never felt this way before" said by someone with no prior emotional history

♡ both confess feelings at the same time. no awkwardness. no stakes. just synchronized emotion.

♡ their first kiss is perfect. no bumped noses. no wrong angle. cinematic and frictionless.

♡ jealousy subplot introduced and dropped without consequence

♡ they have one shared interest and it is the plot

♡ trauma bonding mistaken for romantic chemistry (these are different things)

♡ the side characters ship them loudly. this is not a substitute for actual tension.

♡ one of them dies temporarily. other is devastated. they come back. no lasting emotional damage.

♡ they end up together because the plot ends, not because they chose each other

♡ epilogue: married with children. every loose end tied. nothing left to feel.

[insaneehamsterwheel]

Keeping this in mind for Pyrrhic Victory

[cedarwool]

being an everything crafter is great but also sucks. like i want to get my watercolors out but i need to put away my microcrochet first. i want to do some leatherwork but my oil paints are on the table. i want to whittle but i'm using the bucket i catch wood shavings in to hold my papermaking mush. i want to write my book but my hands are too busy knitting a sweater. i want to code another video game but i'm too busy studying nalebinding. do you see my problem. the problem is that i need more hands

[insaneehamsterwheel]

If you add 3 sentences to your work in progress and show me, I will add 4 sentences to my work in progress and show you.

It can be any work in progress that you want it to be. Preferably ones that you haven't added anything 2 in a while.

This ask gave me inspiration to write two paragraphs to something I haven't touched in.. 4 months <3

[insaneehamsterwheel]

Can harem endings work?

I'm currently working out a concept for a fanfic and I really want the character to end up with everyone because I really can't choose (5-6 love interests). I'm planning on it being polyamory, because polygamy is NOT the goal, but I have yet to see good harem fics. Do you think a harem ending can work? If not, why so, what can I do? And if yes, PLEASE leave some tips. And if there's anything you guys hate to see in tropes like this, let me know! I look forward to any response because I need help ;(

Also, the harem-ing makes sense to the plot, so to say, of the fic, but everyone looks forward to end-ships, that's the problem!

[magekrove]

I love memes and have a lot of time on a bus

[deikshen]

I FUCKING LAUGHED OUT LOUD

I FUCKING LOVE YOU SO MUCH. MY STOMACH HURTS FROM LAUGHING

*Edit: For those asking about the fic, it's mine!! and you can read it here :3

[writerscourt]

Would you happen to have any AU Career ideas (like completely underrated or bizarre things people might not consider when throwing their kickbut hero into a different state of adventure?)

Unique Career AUs

Cast at Adventure Parks (disney, mermaid in aquariums, …)

Clinical Trial Volunteer

Employee at a pizza place used as a front for money laundering

Ethical Hacker

Hostage Negotiator

IRL Actor/Actress (hired to cry at the funeral of random people, stand in at a wedding party, pretend to be a date, get interviewed on the news pretending like they were present at an event, …)

Ice Sculptor for fancy events

Investigative Journalist

Matchmaker

Paranormal Medium

Poison Specialist (claims to focus on antidotes, but is that true?)

Professional Cuddler

Running a wildlife sanctuary in a fantasy/scifi setting

Testing security/TSA by deliberately trying to smuggle forbidden items past them

Similarly, testing security systems by trying to pull off a heist with permission of the company

A legal advisor in a setting where the world has ended, but bureaucracy survived

Translator for an organised crime ring

[red-garden]

Scumegaverse but Shen Yuan transmigrated from a non omegaverse world and he doesn’t always realize what he’s actually doing in context. He ends up scenting his disciples when he’s being affectionate with them, which does melt their little brains a bit since only family and lovers are supposed to scent you. He also gives disciples nesting supplies to make them comfortable, which is again something only family and lovers do. It’s not helping the accusations of outsiders who think he perves on his disciples, but the disciples themselves have become even more feral in their devotion. That’s not just their Shizun, that’s their MOMMY.

Luo Binghe of course gets scented the most, followed by Ning Yingying. Binghe is incredibly torn between loving the scenting and hating that Shizun sees him as a baby. Ning Yingying used to get scented all the time by Shen Jiu (he smelled content like jasmine with her so people never recognized it as him) and she’s trying to keep a brave face about Shizun not treating her as closely as before. Ming Fan almost had an aneurysm the first time he got scented and he subtly begs (by conspicuously standing nearby longer than necessary) for more attention.

Shen Yuan accidentally scented Liu Qingge during the caves incident and has continued to do so during meridian cleansing. Liu Qingge believes that he is being desperately flirted with, and is trying to speed the proper courtship process as quickly as possible. He was on one occasion pulled into Shen Yuan’s nest when he accidentally intruded on a heat, and he’s never been the same since.

Yue Qingyuan is one of the only people who regularly visits Shen Qingqiu who hasn’t been scented. He is so incredibly sad about it.

[eggsolotl]

Hamhuaaaa!! I always thought abt sqh/xf having thick, floofy hair and writing sheep-haired bingbing to resemble himself in a way (FOOD FOR THOUGHT!)

[writer-woes-and-woahs]

I challenge you to put a

FROG

in your current story.

Just drop the little guy in there.

Everything's better with a

FROG.

[writersisland]

Reasons for Fake Dating

ACTING AU: “I'm up for one of the biggest roles of my life but never had time for dating, so please help me perfect that longing look I need.”

“After only a night together my nosy neighbour saw you leave and told my parents and they can't know I'm having casual sex so I need to introduce you to them.”

“Being married gets you benefits at my job, so I really need a partner but I don't have time to date.”

CELEB AU: “I'm sick of my PR team putting me up with other celebs so I want someone to go on dates with me every couple weeks so the press thinks I'm in a committed relationship.”

CELEB AU: “My PR team wants to better my image and you have a really good reputation so now we're on a fake date but you're actually really charming.”

CRIMINAL AU: “I need to steal some stuff from a rich people event and need someone to come with me to cover for me while I sneak off.”

“I never cared to find a partner but my childhoold best friend is getting married and I don't want to be the only one without a plus one there.”

“I paid you for a night but ran into someone I know and I was embarrassed and called you my partner and now we're both invited to a dinner next week.”

“I’m an influencer and need a partner to get pics with and post cute videos with and shit my follows love our dynamic specifically, can we keep up the act?”

“I'm trying to get back at my parents and you look like trouble, so wanna cause chaos at thanksgiving?”

“Let's get dressed up and go to different bars to pretend to get engaged for free drinks and desserts.”

“My ex cheated on me and I need to show that I can pull too and you're the hottest person I know so can I use you to make my ex jealous?”

“My grandparents are horrible people but to get their inheritence I need to marry, will you fake a wedding with me and keep it up until they pass?”

“Thank you for playing along when we ran into my ex with their new partner and I pretended we're together even though we're just coworkers, but now we're both invited to their wedding.”

“They offer free drinks to couples at the bar on valetine's day, so wanna pretend to be my partner?”

“This person is following me around the bar and won't leave me alone, please play my partner for a second.”

“To be able to see you when you're in a coma in the hospital, I lied about being your partner, but now the nurse introduced me as such to your family and I was too awkward to clear it up and we spent weeks at your bedside together and now that you're awake I need you to keep up the act.”

“We both need a place to live and this apartment is perfect but the landlord is weirdly conversative and will only rent out to couples so we need to pretend to be together and it worked but oops wait there is only one bedroom.”

“We're barely even friends but when my friends saw a picture of us together and asked I wanted to show off and said you're my partner, but now you moved closer and I need to keep up the lie.”

“We're childhood best friends and I just found out people back in the day bet on whether we would get together and I kinda want to know how they would react if we say we're together at the next class reunion.”

“You're in the hospital and I'm worried so I pretended to be your partner to be able to come see you but you need to stay a while longer so we need to keep up the act.”

[kcokaine]

itafushi stocks going up

[lambiesvault]

Magical girl transformation but it's Shen Yuan immediately going from lazily lounging as he reads with half his robes falling off his shoulders to sitting up with immaculate posture and perfectly covered skin when someone knocks on his door

[nigelgraz]

Gentle

[insaneehamsterwheel]

Of course it's NIGEL GRAZ drawing what's been clawing at my mind. So beautiful..

[aquilacalvitium]

[izunias-meme-hole]

I dunno about Jekyll and Hyde... but we did get two spiritually faithful adaptations for Frankenstein and Dracula

[infinityundone]

The best part about Iron Lung is that it's not a movie about Markiplier, it's a movie about a guy who just happens to be played by Markiplier. Like it starts and you're like "Omg it's Markiplier!" and then a few minutes later you stop seeing Markiplier, and instead you just see Simon, a guy trapped in a submarine in an ocean of blood. If, say, Mr Beast tried to make a similar film it would be like "Hey guys, I'm Mr Beast, and today, I'm going on a wacky adventure in this blood ocean with my zany cast of friends!"

[writersisland]

Ot3 AU Dynamics

DJ x Barkeeper x Bouncer

Food Reviewer x Waiter x Chef

Barista x Tattoo Artist x Flower Shop Owner

Singer x Drummer x Manager

Thief x Security x Shop Owner

Performer x Make Up Artist x Costume Designer

Unruly Employee x Team Lead x HR Rep

Lawyer x Informant x Detective

Hero x Villain x Civilian

Lawful x Chaotic x Neutral

Pessimist x Nihilist x Absurdist

Saint x Sinner x Deity

Friend x Friend x Foe

Grumpy x Sunshine x Chaos Goblin

Protégé x Mentor x Enemy

Leader x Second-in-Command

Service Top x Bratty Bottom x Verse living the Life

Knight x Royal x Jester

Guard x Prisoner x Medic